George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[Jorch Einstein]

Jorch, if you or one of your Premrat stooges is reading this, I'd just like to tell you that it's not too late to try and improve yourself. I'm not saying you would succeed...but it's not too late to try. You can take one of these night classes, for instance.

[coaster]

I guess they are so hard up for guests that they are going back to the 2012 nonsense-
Betsey Lewis, will discuss her latest work on transformational events taking place on Mother Earth according to the 13 Indigenous Grandmothers of the world. According to the 'Star People,' we live in a time that will herald the "Galactic Dawn"-- a mass awakening of humanity to our cosmic origins and intergalactic relationships.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

I guess they are so hard up for guests that they are going back to the 2012 nonsense-
Betsey Lewis, will discuss her latest work on transformational events taking place on Mother Earth according to the 13 Indigenous Grandmothers of the world. According to the 'Star People,' we live in a time that will herald the "Galactic Dawn"-- a mass awakening of humanity to our cosmic origins and intergalactic relationships.

Aren't all grandmothers indigenous to the world?

[chefist]

The following is a list of documented George Noory quotes. Known as "Nooryisms"... these non sequitur quips and half-witted, meandering ramblings serve only to exacerbate my feelings of disappointment over what has happened since Noory took over Coast to Coast AM. If you happen to know of others and you can document when they occurred, please post them in a reply to this topic.


"Could it be a portal?"

***********

"Fascinating, could it be angels?"
"I don't think there's any doubt."

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"Let me tell you even I have learned some things here I didn't know about."
From Jul 19 2007. Following a round table discussion on trans-humanism.

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"How 'bout a dramatic topic... trans-humanism... you know, when you just think of the word trans-humanism, you dudint think that it's that exciting but it really is!"
From July 19 2007. He really did say dudn't.

***********

"If we all had our own solar system, we wouldn't have to worry about that."
From July 19, 2007. During a discussion on solar energy.

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"Did you hear today they just found Saturn's 60th moon? I will give you one million dollars of the network's money, James, if you, in the next two minutes, can name all sixty."
From July 19, 2007.

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George Noory: "Dr. Leir's website is www.alienscalpel.com. Ooh, that's scary sounding. Alien scalpel."

Dr. Roger Leir: "Well, you know me George, I don't try to scare people."

George Noory: "Yeah, with those fang teeth of yours?"
July 6, 2007.

************

"If you raised a baby and beat it and kicked it and yelled at it, it would turn out to be a mean baby?"
July 19, 2007.

************

"Jim, humanity has always been looking for ways to improve on our suffering and improve on disease, aging and involuntary death..."
July 19, 2007.

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"You know, Ray, everytime I think of things in the future, I think of the Jetsons."
July 19, 2007.

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"Well before too long we'll all be cyborgs won't we?"
July 19, 2007.

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"I would guess your mind is part of who you are."
July 19, 2007.

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"If you had a chance to go back to Skull and Bones right now, as a little fly on the ointment, so to speak, what would you be looking for?"

************

"Gosh!"

************

I've been fascinated by this my entire life.

************

Al-ja-reeza.

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"Things are never as they seem.

***********

I should write a book. I've always wanted to write a book. I should write a book about kids who see dead people.

***********

"Wouldn't it be amazing if one day they discover a buried UFO and flipped a switch and on it goes?" (Another non-sequitur.)

***********

I don't believe in coincidences.

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There are no coincidences.

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Coincidences don't exist.

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Have I ever mentioned that I don't believe in coincidences?

***********

OK, Canadian. Don't knock our administration.

***********

I really do believe 2012 is coming. What do you think about that?

***********

"Well, the group mind experiments I've done on the show have been rather tentative because I don't know what the heck I'm doing.

***********

George: "It would be great if Saddam just left Iraq, don't you think?"

Hal: "Yes, but he's not going to do that. Like last time, he's going to put his citizens in harm's way, use them as human shields, and wreak destruction on the oil fields."

George: "That's kind of selfish, isn't it?"

***********

"Yeah, March 3rd is a full moon. When our boys go in that'd be the best time, because they'll really need the light to see." (On the Iraq invasion.)

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"I truly believe there are other solar systems out there. I really do."

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That'll make you want to think.

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"Just let it go. Don't worry about it. If you screw up, no one will ever know." (George talking to his board operator during a break when his mic was accidentally left open.)

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A story is worth a thousand words.

***********

Richard C. Hoagland: So he used the Star Wars theme the night before the God damn war started! Can I say that on here?

George Noory: No.

Richard C. Hoagland: Oh. OK.

***********

"That's got to be the worst luck I've ever heard of... in a very long time."

***********

I was jumping over chairs and knocking them over with my back feet."

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"Yeah. Pretty scary. But has anyone considered the people that live underground? (Referring to the Sounds From Hell clip.)

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"Lex has done it again. I don't know how Lex does it." (Referring to listener-submitted photos on the website.)

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"Oh, yeah."
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Sure.
That's right.
Uh huh.
Gee.
Ha ha. That?s true.
Yeah.
I was just going to say...
Sure, yeah.
Gosh, he comes up with some great stuff.
(Noory's interactions with Michio Kaku in April of 2003.)

***********

"He's dedicated to finding the 'Theory of Almost Everything.'"
(Referring to Michio Kaku.)

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"Did he have.....Lamb Legs?"
(Referring to a half-man, half-animal thing a caller said was chasing her.)

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"You know, you sound exactly like Don Johnson."
(Immediately following a lengthy monologue by guest Zeph Daniel.)

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Are they called sand scripts because they were written on tablets of sand?
(To Michael Cremo, referring to the Sanskrit language.)

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Chucacabra.

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"Do you think asteroids have a brain and know which side of the planet to crash into?"

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"You'll know how advanced they are by the amount of graffiti in the tunnels.
(Referring to Mars.)

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Wagering war...

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"I've got to ask you something, and this is going to be a very profound question. I want you to think for a moment, if you haven't already, and... oh, I guess you probably already have...

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Can you add hydrogen to, say, gasoline... or does that defeat the purpose?"

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"I want to go back to the dark ages and find out what the reason was. I think it was an asteroid or a meteor."

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"Elderly Thomas Edison was elderly."
March 28, 2007.

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"Bigfoot may well be an extraterrestrial, because... remember Chewbacca?"

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"We're not talking about dead people. We're talking about the aliens... of their ghosts!"

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"Well, with prophecy you got to see what happens."

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"You do something annual every year, don't you?"

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"What I do is create an aura of mystery."

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"Sometimes I wish the aliens would abduct me and crown me as their leader."

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"Who or what was the Great Pyramid?"

[Rico999]

What's with Dave and that MH370 flight?  He's obsessed with it.  And obsessed with saying "I told you so," if it turns up somewhere other than the bottom of the ocean.

Speaking of the ocean, did any of you pick up on the most pea-brained conversation ever between Tommy and Dave late on the open lines segment last week?  The one where Dave pondered the question "Whut'f they drained the ocean, whuddya think they'd find on the bottom?"

Tommy replied "Lots of dead bodies."  He meant human.   Even Dave couldn't buy into THAT one....

[Dateline]

What does Norry call a baby wig?  A mean baby wiglet.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

Well goodnight Noory.  I can get more informed discussion about this subject on NPR or equivalent.

[trostol]

so i am new here and i have been lurking before i joined..why is he called Dave? lol

[Gassy Man]

For a Harvard professor, Robert Putnam doesn't seem like the most articulate or even thoughtful man in the world.

[UFQuack]

Robert Putnam might as well have been burping out his asshole for an hour and half and it would accomplish as much. Why don't Jorch and Mr. Putnam give up their jobs so all these "poor children" can get to work. Hell I'm sure some of them would do a better job hosting than Jorch does--even right now as little kids!

[Royal_Tenenbaum]

so i am new here and i have been lurking before i joined..why is he called Dave? lol

Welcome! Could I offer you some tumahric?

[WOTR]

so i am new here and i have been lurking before i joined..why is he called Dave? lol

Long story very short... A station manager had referred to George as being "Dave Noorie" in correspondence with a poster here and the name stuck.

I think we need a faq...

Anyhow, welcome, and post often.

Here is the long, complete story from a couple of years ago... The reference to "Dave Noorie" may have made lonevoices' day, but it made our decade.

Already did. 

For background:  when it comes to AM news/talk format, my market has a Clear Channel owned blow torch and a locally-owned independent station.   We don't have a Cumulus station, but the local station has always carried some Cumulus content, as well as Hannity (which they lost to Clear Channel recently).  My thinking was that IF Art's announcement is that he's returning to broadcast radio, and IF Cumulus is the syndicator, the locally-owned station would have been approaced by Cumulus about carrying it, and might be lead into spilling some beans.

Here's the email I sent to their VP/GM:
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Hello.  I’m sorry to see that the local Clear Channel affiliate has taken Sean Hannity from you and given you the Dave Ramsey show in his time slot.  As a listener, I’d prefer to support your local station rather than Clear Channel.

My main question to you, since your station carries some Cumulus content such as Mark Levin, will you be picking up the new Cumulus-syndicated  Art Bell show?   If so, do you have any information as to what time slot it will occupy?
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Here's the reply I got (emphasis mine):

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At this point we look to keep Mark Levin on and I will check out the Art Bell return.  He was gone for awhile and I think Dave Noorie replaced him.

We were Sad to have Sean leave but that is sometimes what happens to small broadcasters vs the Big Guys of Clear Channel when they own all these shows they syndicate.


Thanks again for being a listener
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Make of that what you will.   To me, it doesn't seem like the guy's being disingenuous that he's heard nothing from Cumulus regarding the possibility of syndicating an Art Bell show.   Still, his reference to Dave Noorie made my day.

[Gassy Man]

Robert Putnam might as well have been burping out his asshole for an hour and half and it would accomplish as much. Why don't Jorch and Mr. Putnam give up their jobs so all these "poor children" can get to work. Hell I'm sure some of them would do a better job hosting than Jorch does--even right now as little kids!

Mr Harvard is also a bit clueless.  George makes some asinine remark about how college graduates can't find a job in their field anymore.  Anyone who has read the research knows that a sizable amount of college graduates -- around 40 percent according to one study -- historically has either not found a job or not found a job in their major.

[Gassy Man]

And now some jackass is going on and on about how we don't teach the right classes at college, as though college is a trade school.  :  There goes a non-college graduate.  Silly.

[trostol]

I think we need a faq...

Anyhow, welcome, and post often.

Here is the long, complete story from a couple of years ago... The reference to "Dave Noorie" may have made lonevoices' day, but it made our decade.

ahh..thanks for the explination

[castimout]

Exactly ... and George seems to have a fear of OPEN LINES ... wonder why that is.

Fear of questions?  Has he resorted to "Just Google it" yet? He usually remembers almost nothing about the callers "question subject" on open lines and stumbles to avoid answering.
I am so curious about only hearing gn's little boy genious stories or current b.s. stories that sound like he made them up on his way to work, but very quiet about high school stories, college activities, friends, military, or his work life before c2c on air. When he does, or is asked, it sounds like he pulls up his Bio and reads the answer from it----no more, no less!  Was he hidden from society from age 10 to 47?? 
I'm too tired to edit this mess.
GNSGNSGNSGNSGNSGNSGNSGNSGNS

[Izintit?]

Dave joked before to a caller that he was a robot, in an extended and frankly bizarre aside. I'm increasingly becoming convinced that Norry was either raised in a household using another language or iHateMedia,Inc HAS installed a computer program to do C2C because of these issues, frequent in immigrants/second-language (think Charlie Chan movies as a popular example) or earlier voice-recognition software. The mixing of phrases, the odd cadences, the odd grammar, mixing metaphors, etc. I don't think drinking, "bad tongues", lack of attention, or autism (etc) could explain it.
-GNS

Ya think?  Noory was born in 1950 which would have made him eighteen in 1968. How can he know so little about all the cultural references that came out of that period? 

[Izintit?]

Occasionally I find myself looking elsewhere online for independant verification that...wait for it...Jorch sucks.

Found a brief article by one Steve Kowch, who ran two Canadian newstalk radio stations for 14 years. He cites three major flaws that make for bad talk radio, and I'm not surprised to discover Jorchie went 3 for 3.

Mistake #1 -  Talk Show Host Doesn't Have an Opinion

sNoory violates this at least two ways, he's constantly riding the fence on most issues, or when asked directly, saying "lots of people have seen things" or some such non-committal garbage. Plus he never calls out the bullshit when it's shoulder-deep.

Mistake #2 - Replacing Opinions with Questions

Pretty much his entire game plan every show, but it's even worse. Jorch never follows up on the index cards questions!

Mistake #3 - Stealing the Listener's Thunder

Here the author is referring to "telling listeners what the caller is going to say before putting them on air" but BumblesNoor has his own more condescending version. After a caller lays out his point, Jorch will sidestep it entirely and replace it with his own simplistic question. He's not just stealing thunder, he's rendering a caller's input completely useless.

Discuss. 

Article: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/20140908141717-62696685-top-3-mistakes-talk-show-hosts-make-on-radio

This all stems from one thing : Noory is extremely mentally lazy.

[CornyCrow]

For a Harvard professor, Robert Putnam doesn't seem like the most articulate or even thoughtful man in the world.

I'm so disappointed.  I expected much more from a Harvard guy.  THere was a time in which Harvard never failed anyone.  They gave their failures a C and people called it 'a gentleman's C'.  He was boring in that he seemed to just repeat the same information over and over and over and offered next to no solutions to the problem.  It was only one caller, I believe, who spoke of NAFTA and that giant sucking sound of jobs going elsewhere. 

Then he kept saying these poor kids don't have a positive adult influence in their lives to encourage them to get a higher education.  Well, that's happened to lots of kids and they managed to put themselves through school.  They also check the employment situation to determine the sort of education required. 

I think the positive influence would better be to see an adult making some sacrifices and working towards a goal. 

Yes.  It's a shame that college has become a trade school.  If I had been independently wealthy I would have had a totally different major.

[expat]

My personal nightmare: A ditsy new-age " Earth mysteries Investigator " trying to tell me she understands quantum physics in an old-lady voice.

That couldn't actually happen, could it? COULD IT?

[michio]

Jorch told a guest a few nights ago "You spell it like it is!". Brilliant Jorch.

The other night Georgie was selling something and finished a sentence, "...as well, too." I kid you not, kids.

[Dateline]

There is an entangled multiverse in every grain of cat litter, just ask Schrader's cat in a box. 

[136 or 142]

21st Century Man,
You may be interested in the upcoming episode of Radiolab
"What if the best medicine was no medicine at all? This hour, we explore the healing powers of belief; from the symbolic power of the doctor coat, to the very real stash of opium in your brain. Listen to Placebo by tuning in to a station near you. "
http://www.radiolab.org/

[21st Century Man]

21st Century Man,
You may be interested in the upcoming episode of Radiolab
"What if the best medicine was no medicine at all? This hour, we explore the healing powers of belief; from the symbolic power of the doctor coat, to the very real stash of opium in your brain. Listen to Placebo by tuning in to a station near you. "
http://www.radiolab.org/

Thanks 136!! 

[136 or 142]

The sh(pl)it show format is doing Jorch no favors.  I find myself tuning in less because no subject is approached with any depth.  At least before, Jorch had to struggle to carry on a conversation and maybe some unusual anecdote would filter through the sludge.  Now its 6 or 7 of Jorch's stock questions and then its off to the callers aka Bill and Annie.  Why bother?

1.You're welcome!

2.I mostly disagree with this above.  As one person wrote here about the Harvard Guest, he started to repeat himself about half way through.  Though there are some guests who have enough material for three hours (and Coast still does some three hour interviews), most don't even have enough for two.  There is probably a reason why most talk shows that have guests rarely have them on for more than one hour and, maybe it's just me, but I find my attention start to fade by the end of the first hour.  The callers tend to bring it back.

Obviously if this were some kind of police interrogation that would be something else, but GN isn't up to that.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

1.You're welcome!

2.I mostly disagree with this above.  As one person wrote here about the Harvard Guest, he started to repeat himself about half way through.  Though there are some guests who have enough material for three hours (and Coast still does some three hour interviews), most don't even have enough for two.  There is probably a reason why most talk shows that have guests rarely have them on for more than one hour and, maybe it's just me, but I find my attention start to fade by the end of the first hour.  The callers tend to bring it back.

Obviously if this were some kind of police interrogation that would be something else, but GN isn't up to that.

But that's just it.  Noory is the one making it repetitive.  He doesn't dig but only asks standard superficial questions, sometimes running out of new things to ask after half an hour.  He doesn't give the guest much to work with.  I think the format is tailored so that he only has to interact with each guest for half an hour (excluding ads) before opening it up to callers, since he is so bad at developing information and narrative in interviews.  They chose unrelated subjects so that we don't see him asking both guests the exact same formulaic questions on the same night.

[136 or 142]

I'm so disappointed.  I expected much more from a Harvard guy.  THere was a time in which Harvard never failed anyone.  They gave their failures a C and people called it 'a gentleman's C'.  He was boring in that he seemed to just repeat the same information over and over and over and offered next to no solutions to the problem.  It was only one caller, I believe, who spoke of NAFTA and that giant sucking sound of jobs going elsewhere. 

Some manufacturing jobs, especially in the auto industry have gone to Mexico, with which, the United States does have a free trade agreement, most though, have gone to China (and probably the majority have been lost to automation) with which the United States does not have a free trade agreement, and, I believe, isn't even a member of GATT or the WTO, or whatever it is called now.

Of course, China is now also seeing the 'giant sucking sound' of their low wage jobs going to the area formerly known as IndoChina  and even to, I believe, North Korea of all places as China has seen large real increases in wages for the last decade or so.  And, what one person wrote here previously is correct.  One response China has implemented to their decline in jobs has been to impose movement restrictions on their citizens while trying to attract industry to under developed areas.

Automation (or what economists refer to as capital, though capital is more than just automation but is all forms of property, plant and equipment) is likely already a  far bigger 'killer' of jobs than outsourcing and will be a bigger killer in the future, and, it's possible that many of the outsourced jobs will also be replaced by automation in China and other low wage areas.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

Some manufacturing jobs, especially in the auto industry have gone to Mexico, with which, the United States does have a free trade agreement, most though, have gone to China (and probably the majority have been lost to automation) with which the United States does not have a free trade agreement, and, I believe, isn't even a member of GATT or the WTO, or whatever it is called now.

Of course, China is now also seeing the 'giant sucking sound' of their low wage jobs going to the area formerly known as IndoChina  and even to, I believe, North Korea of all places as China has seen large real increases in wages for the last decade or so.  And, what one person wrote here previously is correct.  One response China has implemented to their decline in jobs has been to impose movement restrictions on their citizens while trying to attract industry to under developed areas.

Automation (or what economists refer to as capital, though capital is more than just automation but is all forms of property, plant and equipment) is likely already a  far bigger 'killer' of jobs than outsourcing and will be a bigger killer in the future, and, it's possible that many of the outsourced jobs will also be replaced by automation in China and other low wage areas.

Absolutely true.  It's not the current administration killing the economy, though a long series of decisions over decades have partially led to the current situation (especially the 2008 collapse).  It's globalization and automation which concentrates the wealth into the hands of those who own, control, and manage industry, and removes jobs from the traditional middle class.

[136 or 142]

But that's just it.  Noory is the one making it repetitive.  He doesn't dig but only asks standard superficial questions, sometimes running out of new things to ask after half an hour.  He doesn't give the guest much to work with.  I think the format is tailored so that he only has to interact with each guest for half an hour (excluding ads) before opening it up to callers, since he is so bad at developing information and narrative in interviews.

I agree that he doesn't ask many follow up questions but seems to flit around from topic to topic randomly.  That said, I find that he does bring up plenty of topics, some of which are interesting and some of which aren't.  I stand by that even a real interviewer like Charlie Rose would have difficulty with many guests with a two hour interview, yet alone a three hour one (which, to be sure is actually closer to 2 hours excluding commercials.)

When Art Bell was starting out, the paranormal topics were new to many people (of course, many listeners also did their own research.)  Now, many have been done to death and for nearly all of them, there has been little new material for the last twenty years.  New and more cases to be sure, but very little new research or theories.

[136 or 142]

Absolutely true.  It's not the current administration killing the economy, though a long series of decisions over decades have partially led to the current situation (especially the 2008 collapse).  It's globalization and automation which concentrates the wealth into the hands of those who own, control, and manage industry, and removes jobs from the traditional middle class.

Yes, I don't begrudge the new technological titans though.  A number of them are self made and they have invented products and services that have provided great benefit and/or enjoyment to many people. Also, many of the high tech jobs are the only really new highly paid jobs to be created over the last 30 years or so.  That said, there are a great many jobs in the high tech sector that are also low paying, such as warehouse workers.

Of course, contrary to what the one caller said, nearly all of these high tech jobs require a great deal of expertise in mathematics, especially calculus. Don't know about trigonometry.

My guess would be that the only poor people with a decent shot these days of moving into anything higher than the lower middle class is to be lucky to be born with a great deal of aptitude in mathematics.