George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[Meggini]

Obviously, the Cheap Channel executives thought they could simply plug George (as the little blonde girl) in to follow Art's formula.  Equally obviously, George's ratings, based on Cheap Channel's requirements for its business model, are good enough.  Otherwise, they'd get another little blonde girl.

Your whole post was really informative. I get it now. Art's show was great because he had total control. Coast is never going to be good again because it's just another product... not a creative endeavor by a talented showman who's not afraid of his audience.

My grieving period is over. 

I would love to see Ian get an another evening show with a different carrier. I really looked forward to his early show. That was good radio,and I'm in Eastern time so that worked better for me.

I listened to a live broadcast on election night (a mock election show that wasn't really about the election at all) that made me believe that there are other "Art Bell"'s in the making - who are using a variety of different mediums to have unscreened call-in shows that are actually fun - not one-trick pony political shows or sports shows. It really is the variety of topics and the call-in portion that makes it interesting. There's an edge-of-your seat element with audience participation and the variety keeps a show from becoming too angry or too sappy.

[McPhallus]

They probably figured the show had already peaked when Art Bell was going through his numerous retirements.  Noory isn't a young man, and his pliability makes him a willing participant to them cashing in while the show inevitably goes down the drain.  When George quits/retires, the show can be conveniently rolled up.

[Eddie Coyle]

When George quits/retires, the show can be conveniently rolled up.

Exactly. Like a dead prostitute in a rug. Dropped off in a vacant lot just to the south of Boston Sand and Gravel depot, underneath the Tobin Bridge where the Mystic River begins to ebb. The area is heavily weeded and in disrepair, only bums and stoners go down there and nobody will ever notice. The rats and raccoons will feast and with winter coming...

[stevesh]

      Exactly. Like a dead prostitute in a rug. Dropped off in a vacant lot just to the south of Boston Sand and Gravel depot, underneath the Tobin Bridge where the Mystic River begins to ebb. The area is heavily weeded and in disrepair, only bums and stoners go down there and nobody will ever notice. The rats and raccoons will feast and with winter coming...

Sounds eerily like the voice of experience. Are there any smiley faces on that bridge ?

[stevesh]

Otherwise, they'd get another little blonde girl.

OK, you Photoshop wizards. We need Simple George as a little blond girl.

[Eddie Coyle]

Sounds eerily like the voice of experience ...

Merely hypothetical. Or coincidental. 

        *Actually, the "alleged" Smiley Face killing(s) in Boston happened not too far away, near the Charles River bridge. My, uh, um..scenario is more discreet.

[ItsOver]

OK, you Photoshop wizards. We need Simple George as a little blond girl.

... and don't forget the crumb-collecting mustache.

[ziznak]

wtf... waters off and some fat guys are pulling my street up... there are no coincidinces... say some poop about noory and blimps... boom waters off.

[Jasmine]

wtf... waters off and some fat guys are pulling my street up... there are no coincidinces... say some poop about noory and blimps... boom waters off.

I'm sending you wads of empathy, tea and sympathy. Two months ago our water was shut off with NO warning and me in the shower lathered in soap! Those fat guys are most definitely from another dimenshun...shadow people...big fat casted shadows.

Totally off topic, has anyone else noticed the VERY bizarre drawing/graphic on the Google home search page? Truly weird drawing...if I was a paranoid person I'd be screamin' New World Order from the rooftops.

[Meggini]

Totally off topic, has anyone else noticed the VERY bizarre drawing/graphic on the Google home search page? Truly weird drawing...if I was a paranoid person I'd be screamin' New World Order from the rooftops.

It's Dracula... a little late for Halloween. From right to left you have
Dracula.
His freaky wives (I can't remember if the dog is also him or just a servant)
His castle (and himself as bat)
Harker and Mina
A villager (I assume)
Lucy and Fiance who I can't remember
Van Helsing
(some guy with a record player - actually maybe that's John Seward)
Renfield

Edited to fix John Seward's position

[SnapT]

It's a tribute to Bram Stoker's Dracula.

[Jasmine]

It's Dracula... a little late for Halloween. From right to left you have
Dracula.
His freaky wives (I can't remember if the dog is also him or just a servant)
His castle (and himself as bat)
Harker and Mina
A villager (I assume)
Lucy and Fiance who I can't remember
Van Helsing
(some guy with a record player - actually maybe that's John Seward)
Renfield

Edited to fix John Seward's position

Thanks, Meggini and SnapT. I see it clearly now. The way post Halloween thang threw me off. Well, so much for those subliminal Skull and Bones messages.

I just had a horrid thought. Imagine Noory breaking into the audio reader biz, and doing the narration for Bram's "Dracula" or Mary Shelley's "Frankenstein". Imagine the tone and inflection in Snoory's voice as he lisps and spews spittle all over these classic Goth tales? Egads!

[Meggini]

Thanks, Meggini and SnapT. I see it clearly now. The way post Halloween thang threw me off. Well, so much for those subliminal Skull and Bones messages.

I just had a horrid thought. Imagine Noory breaking into the audio reader biz, and doing the narration for Bram's "Dracula" or Mary Shelley's "Frankenstein". Imagine the tone and inflection in Snoory's voice as he lisps and spews spittle all over these classic Goth tales? Egads!

Hsssss... The horror!

I've loved Bram Stoker's Dracula since seeing the Frank Langella as a kid (which is why the characters in the graphic jumped right out at me). There was a high-quality version of Frankenstein out around the same time, and I loved that too.

[Jasmine]

Let me tell you some things about broadcasting - based on my own career. Broadcast executives think they know everything.  Anchors, hosts, producers, account executives, and particularly audience members are all idiots.  They are all to be manipulated and fooled.

My specialty in broadcasting was to go to television stations with news departments that were failures in the ratings.  I would work for 2-3 years to devise and execute a plan and get the ratings up significantly.  The executives expressed their gratitude, but when it came time for me to be rewarded for my efforts, the executives would run me off or fire me, and turn the operation to a 25-year old blonde girl with two years experience.  They thought she would be able to follow my "formula" and keep the ratings up. She never did.  In another few years, the ratings would stink again, and the executives wouldn't know why.  They never understand creativity and flexibility.

Obviously, the Cheap Channel executives thought they could simply plug George (as the little blonde girl) in to follow Art's formula.  Equally obviously, George's ratings, based on Cheap Channel's requirements for its business model, are good enough.  Otherwise, they'd get another little blonde girl.

Fascinating post. That totally fucked up yet all-too-familiar corporate mindset can be applied to any and all industries. As the old saying goes, it's not one thing after another, it's the same damn thing over and over again.

BTW, speaking of corporate bullshit, DO read the new book by the witty and brilliant James Kunen - "Diary of a Company Man: Losing a Job, Finding a Life". My husband just read it and raved about it.

Perhaps we should send George a copy?

[Jasmine]

Hsssss... The horror!

I've loved Bram Stoker's Dracula since seeing the Frank Langella as a kid (which is why the characters in the graphic jumped right out at me). There was a high-quality version of Frankenstein out around the same time, and I loved that too.

That Frank Langella version was damn good. I'm an avid 60's and especially old 70's horror film fan. Brian De Palma's "Carrie" is one of my faves - Sissy Spacek and Piper Laurie were simply outstanding, and it was a pretty damn good film translation from King's novel.
I also love those ancient old 70's made-for-TV thrillers - my dad has a lot of them. Cheesy, campy are some, but there's something about the 70's - they nailed the horror genre in a manner we'll never see again. There are exceptions (Rob Reiner's "Misery" being one of a few). I love 1975's "Race With the Devil" with Peter Fonda and Warren Oates - freaky film.

Another cheesy-but-fun 70's made-for-TV thriller: "Devil Dog: The Hound of Hell" !!

NOORY SUCKS. Carrie's mom: "They're all gonna laugh at you...George!"

[Morgus]

Today is the start of a special 4-day Noory-free weekend since Noory is taking some of his end of the year vacation days off...

[Eddie Coyle]

I love 1975's "Race With the Devil" with Peter Fonda and Warren Oates - freaky film.

         The best "hicks as Satanists" film of the mid 70's. Another reason I've spent a life time avoiding Tejas. And Winnebago trips. And trips with other couples. And people.

[Meggini]

I also love those ancient old 70's made-for-TV thrillers - my dad has a lot of them. Cheesy, campy are some, but there's something about the 70's - they nailed the horror genre in a manner we'll never see again. ...

NOORY SUCKS. Carrie's mom: "They're all gonna laugh at you...George!"

I agree. Those made-for-TV movies were great. What were the smoking? If only SyFy could get some because their made-for-TVs are terrible.

I did like the recent Katie Holmes remake of Don't Be Afraid of the Dark.

[ItsOver]

Today is the start of a special 4-day Noory-free weekend since Noory is taking some of his end of the year vacation days off...

Good news:  4 Noory-free nights!  Bad news:  Wells is on for 3 nights.  Oh, well.

[HorrorRetro]

That Frank Langella version was damn good. I'm an avid 60's and especially old 70's horror film fan. Brian De Palma's "Carrie" is one of my faves - Sissy Spacek and Piper Laurie were simply outstanding, and it was a pretty damn good film translation from King's novel.
I also love those ancient old 70's made-for-TV thrillers - my dad has a lot of them. Cheesy, campy are some, but there's something about the 70's - they nailed the horror genre in a manner we'll never see again. There are exceptions (Rob Reiner's "Misery" being one of a few). I love 1975's "Race With the Devil" with Peter Fonda and Warren Oates - freaky film.

Another cheesy-but-fun 70's made-for-TV thriller: "Devil Dog: The Hound of Hell" !!

NOORY SUCKS. Carrie's mom: "They're all gonna laugh at you...George!"

We'd get along great.  '70s made-for-TV movies are my favorite genre -- Bad Ronald, Crowhaven Farm, The House on Greenapple Rd., Home for the Holidays, The Screaming Woman, Trapped, etc.  I never get tired of watching them.  I, too, love Race with the Devil and Devil Dog: The Hound of Hell with Richard Crenna lol. When my husband and I are out for drives in the country, I always tell him we have to be alert for the hillbilly witches.   

[ziznak]

whoa... carrie was probly the best and only really good king book to film... its impossible to translate his writing to film with all his fucking character developement... ahhh what was that short story or actually i think it was a full book "geralds game" about the wife getting rapped and the husband passes out n dies with the chick tied to the bed and she's all thinking about how her dad fondled her as a kid... great shit. spoilers my bad!!

[Jasmine]

We'd get along great.  '70s made-for-TV movies are my favorite genre -- Bad Ronald, Crowhaven Farm, The House on Greenapple Rd., Home for the Holidays, The Screaming Woman, Trapped, etc.  I never get tired of watching them.  I, too, love Race with the Devil and Devil Dog: The Hound of Hell with Richard Crenna lol. When my husband and I are out for drives in the country, I always tell him we have to be alert for the hillbilly witches. 

LOL! HorrorRetro, did you ever see the 1973 made-for-TV thriller "Dying Room Only" with Cloris Leachman, Dabney Coleman, and Ned Beatty? Husband and wife on road trip - stop off at slimy roadside cafe for gas and coffee - husband goes into washroom...and vanishes. When my husband and I drove down to Florida, I REFUSED to take the side roads and stop at small town cafes! He thought I was insane! Great flim.

"The Screaming Woman" !! LOVE IT! Ending scene when Olivia digs up the buried woman during the thunderstorm (all 70's TV thrillers had the most horrific storms!) That ending blew me away.

I agree. Those made-for-TV movies were great. What were the smoking? If only SyFy could get some because their made-for-TVs are terrible.

I did like the recent Katie Holmes remake of Don't Be Afraid of the Dark.

They were smoking something cheesy but memorable! Remember the old 1970 made for TV thriller "The House that Would Not Die" with Barbara Stanwyck?
"Aimee come home!" I wouldn't go into our basement for days after seeing that one.

[Eddie Coyle]

I agree. Those made-for-TV movies were great. What were the smoking? If only SyFy could get some because their made-for-TVs are terrible.

They smoked/snorted/shot better shit than today. The SyFy movies are intentionally awful, but completely witless and worthless. Charmless and dull bad movies starring "actors" who should have their SAG cards burned. They make Lifetime movies look like Stanley Kubrick.

[ChewMouse]

Remember the old 1970 made for TV thriller "The House that Would Not Die" with Barbara Stanwyck?
"Aimee come home!" I wouldn't go into our basement for days after seeing that one.

Oh my gosh!! I thought I was the only person alive that saw that movie! I swear to you I can do that call ("Aimeeeee, come hoooome!") almost perfectly, but nobody gets it. That movie scared the hell out of me.

[LacyWoodrow]

I've never read the old school dracula novels, though I did read Mary Shelley's Frankenstein and loved it. My view of a vampire was nailed in Anna Rice's novels. Though I admit there were some annoying parts with the gay lust parts, everything else I admired.

I hear people talk great about Twilight, and my only opinion of them is that they failed to read Anna's work. 
When someone says Hunger games, I tell them I don't need to read it. I read Richard Bachman's (Stephen King) the Running Man and The long walk. If they did too, then they would see where she got her idea for the book. Sorry, just had to add in my 2 cents. 

[LacyWoodrow]

Speaking of made for TV movies, "The 10th kingdom" was soo good. I wish DVR was out then, I would watch it over and over again lol.

[Jasmine]

         The best "hicks as Satanists" film of the mid 70's. Another reason I've spent a life time avoiding Tejas. And Winnebago trips. And trips with other couples. And people.

I hear ya, brother. And it seemed as if the entire state of Texas was populated by satan worshippers! The ending totally freaked me out.

Oh my gosh!! I thought I was the only person alive that saw that movie! I swear to you I can do that call ("Aimeeeee, come hoooome!") almost perfectly, but nobody gets it. That movie scared the hell out of me.

My brother quotes that line to me from time to time...and it STILL sends shivers down my spine! Glad to know there's some other 70's thriller fans here!

[ItsOver]

          They smoked/snorted/shot better shit than today. The SyFy movies are intentionally awful, but completely witless and worthless. Charmless and dull bad movies starring "actors" who should have their SAG cards burned. They make Lifetime movies look like Stanley Kubrick.

Hahahahah.....you've got that right.  Complete swill.  Kubrick was an absolute genius.  SyFy and it's ilk only cater to the lowest denominator now, much like C2C and the Snooron.  Not even B-grade, cheesy good.  Just bad.  Ed Woods would be embarrassed. 

If I want to watch cheap movies, I'll go with the '50s and '60s sci-fi.  Enjoyed "Earth vs. The Flying Saucers" and "20 Million Miles to Earth" on Turner last week.  Cheesy, yet strangely satisfying. 

[Jasmine]

whoa... carrie was probly the best and only really good king book to film... its impossible to translate his writing to film with all his fucking character developement... ahhh what was that short story or actually i think it was a full book "geralds game" about the wife getting rapped and the husband passes out n dies with the chick tied to the bed and she's all thinking about how her dad fondled her as a kid... great shit. spoilers my bad!!

Ziznak, haven't a clue as to that story (wife raped, etc.) It sounds pretty effed up.

King was said to be very pleased with Brian De Palma's script and editing for "Carrie", yet pissed at Kubrick's translation of "The Shining", which, while brilliant as a book, was far too layered and complexed re two hour script format.

You guys want to see a FABULOUS 70's horror? Try and get your hands on Bob Clark's 1974's "Black Christmas" with Olivia Hussey, Margot Kidder, and John Saxon. John Carpenter totally ripped this very frightening film off four years later with "Halloween". "Black Christmas" will have you turning all the lights on in your home, and afraid to answer the phone!

Also, does anyone here remember the cheesy but fun 1974 TV thriller "Satan's School for Girls" with Kate Jackson and Cheryl Ladd pre "Charlie's Angels"? Or, "Play Misty for Me" and "The Norliss Tapes".

The 70's rocked...Noory doesn't.

[Meggini]

I haven't seen Black Christmas or The House That Would Not Die, but I can watch them on YouTube:

Black Christmas:
Black Christmas [1|10]

The House That Would Not Die:
The House That Would Not Die - Barbara Stanwyck (1970) Full movie

Good times.