George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[SnapT]

George reported on the death of that GLEE star AGAIN tonight.

Right after a report of dead children in India who ate poisoned food, naturally.

[Meanandnasty]

Just leaked on TMZ, one of the exclusive agreements within the contract.  George will be taking an all-expense paid vacation to a tropical island.  He will be taking a trip to Haiti, home country of thuh Haters.  He will be doing a live remote broadcasting.  It is reported that there is civil unrest within the staff, and they are joining forces for an uprising.  George will be removed and sent home packing to St. Louis to pod cast as the Nighthawk. The Master is waiting in the wings of the frequencies.

[NooryIsADouchebag]

I  HATE saying this, but at the risk of preventing JBW getting the nod...it could have been worse.

Personally, I'd rather listen to Wells 24x7 for 1000 years than listen to George for 5 stinking minutes - let alone for however many utterly depressing more years we just got stuck with.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

Cries of 'Bingo' and shots of strong liquor all round if Joorchie asks Varla if she's related to Jesse, which he did last time she was on. She also provided NMN with one of our all-time favorite sNoory moments as he trailed two of her novels, The Vampyr and The Malevolent Banshee. The Idiot adopted one of his stupid accents, so the first title came out as The Vumpeeerrrrrrr and the second as something akin to Thuh Ma Lava Lamp Bunsheeeee. Hoping for a repeat tonight.

First question "I ask you this every time you're on the show, but any relation to Jesse Ventura?"  It was almost like he was embarrassed to ask it, apologizing in advance.

[Morgus]

Ugh, a caller in the first hour told Noory that he remembered listening to when Art Bell announced his retirement and he thought Noory was going to do that with his announcement at the start of the show.
But Noory then comforted him telling him that he isn't going anywhere for a long, long time. Yuck...

[Morgus]

First question "I ask you this every time you're on the show, but any relation to Jesse Ventura?"  It was almost like he was embarrassed to ask it, apologizing in advance.

Again Noory didn't even know that Jesse Ventura's name isn't his real name either, so why would a real Ventura be related? 

[popple]

I thought he was going to say they're asking him to step down because he's not capable.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

How is it someone who studies Mermaids sounds way more rational than the vast majority of economic, political, and science reporters on the show?

[Morgus]

Noory just brought up the old movie "Splash" starring Darryl Hannah as a mermaid.
Apparently he did that so he could lead in to telling about meeting Darryl at one of the many health expo events he goes to...

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

...Apparently he did that so he could lead in to telling about meeting Darryl at one of the many health expo events he goes to...

lol that was a pretty obvious play by George.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

Again Noory didn't even know that Jesse Ventura's name isn't his real name either, so why would a real Ventura be related? 

It just seemed he felt obligated to ask it for some reason.

[Elinor]

Noory, Chicken of the Sea



[attachimg=1]

[imagine]

In the announcement on the Coast website George claims he's looking forward to bringing riveting programs...

If only.

[coaster]

He really showed his haters.. If he only knew the only reason he still has a job is because no one else wants to host that shitty show.

[MTB]

How is it someone who studies Mermaids sounds way more rational than the vast majority of economic, political, and science reporters on the show?

I was wondering the same thing

[zeebo]

George reported on the death of that GLEE star AGAIN tonight.

Right after a report of dead children in India who ate poisoned food, naturally.

This must be the "new heights" they were talking about in the press release.

[Ccavsman]

Since George fired a nuclear suck torpedo up this shows ass years ago, I'll assume you're being massively sarcastic!

Very. Keep the musicians and actors off the show too Jorch.

[Jackpine Savage]

Why did the Good Lord take Jimmy Hoffa and not George!!! Only the good die young. 

[Elinor]

In the announcement on the Coast website George claims he's looking forward to bringing riveting programs...

If only.

This is about as riveting as George is gonna get:


[attachimg=1]

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

This is about as riveting as George is gonna get:


[attachimg=1]

Norie the nonRiveter lol

[WOTR]

I have what I consider to be proof that Noory died two years ago- it is not surprising that George and the rat signed a long term contract.  Tommy has just been pressing buttons on the board using recorded clips of George performing his standard questions and comments from the 3X5 cue cards for the last couple of years.  It has been commented on that George and Tommy are always seen together and that George never goes anywhere without his producer... Ever see A Weekend At Burnies???  Take a look at that video of George and Tommy in the back seat of the convertible during the parade and tell me if you cannot picture Tommy pulling a string to make his hand jump awkwardly.


How are Youuu?
It ahs been a long time since we have spoken.
How did you get into this thing?
Faxcinating.
Where can we bi your book?
Hahaha.  What have you been up to?
Letsh take a caller.


And on it goes with Tommy hitting a random button any time he hears silence on the other end of the line.

[RedMichael]

Jorch was just lucky that Art Bell's potential return happened during a contract year. They really can't afford to change hosts right now. That would just encourage listeners to be open to other things. If Mr. Bell is coming back he really has C2C cornered. They are stuck with Jorch and Jorch doesn't stand a chance against Bell.

[Treading Water]

How is it someone who studies Mermaids sounds way more rational than the vast majority of economic, political, and science reporters on the show?

Ummmmm, because they aren't "real" economic, political, science reporters??   

[dog_breath23]

I really feel that we are living in a strange world.  George Noory is  a great talent.  WTF

[valdez]

I have what I consider to be proof that Noory died two years ago...

I love this theory.  Tommy must also be cashing George's checks and has invested a portion of it to buy one of those Japanese robots to do meet n' greets and Elvis songs.  Another theory is that we've all died and gone to hell.

I'm hoping George tries to read from Varla Ventura's bibliography again.
varlaventura.mp3 (56.62 kB - downloaded 16 times.)

Dr. Nick Begich on HAARP, and Varla Ventura on ... mermaids.  Ye gods.  This contract extension is a nightmare.  The jackboot of mediocrity stomps squarely on the heads of intelligent c2c fans everywhere.  We must remain steadfast and continue to document the idiocy, and, perhaps more importantly, to do more of the work that folks like Coaster (Maxwell also shared a prime piece of audio with us) are doing.  George and his minions can brush off the criticism, and the photoshops of him with his head up his butt, and the Hitler youtube parodies, as mere products of hateful, no-life, minds; but straight audio of George and his mumblings cannot be ignored or explained.  There are people here at coastgab that admit to not having listened to him in years and have been shocked by what they heard on Coaster's samplings.  Yeah.  That's George Noory.  The guy who just extended his contract up until astronauts land on Mars, and if that's the case I say we chip in and get a cockroach on the next rover to that planet, call it an "astronaut," and be done with this fool.
 

hell

[Lunger]

     I love this theory.  Tommy must also be cashing George's checks and has invested a portion of it to buy one of those Japanese robots to do meet n' greets and Elvis songs.  Another theory is that we've all died and gone to hell.
     Dr. Nick Begich on HAARP, and Varla Ventura on ... mermaids.  Ye gods.  This contract extension is a nightmare.  The jackboot of mediocrity stomps squarely on the heads of intelligent c2c fans everywhere.  We must remain steadfast and continue to document the idiocy, and, perhaps more importantly, to do more of the work that folks like Coaster (Maxwell also shared a prime piece of audio with us) are doing.  George and his minions can brush off the criticism, and the photoshops of him with his head up his butt, and the Hitler youtube parodies, as mere products of hateful, no-life, minds; but straight audio of George and his mumblings cannot be ignored or explained.  There are people here at coastgab that admit to not having listened to him in years and have been shocked by what they heard on Coaster's samplings.  Yeah.  That's George Noory.  The guy who just extended his contract up until astronauts land on Mars, and if that's the case I say we chip in and get a cockroach on the next rover to that planet, call it an "astronaut," and be done with this fool.
 

hell

There can't possible be any intelligent C2C fans.   So no problem.

[ItsOver]

"The continued growth and success of Coast to Coast AM is a testament to George's incredible talent and dedication," stated Julie Talbott, President of Content and Affiliate Services for National Media Groups, Clear Channel Media and Entertainment. "Each year, George takes Coast to Coast AM to new heights, and we couldn't be happier to extend our partnership with him for years to come."

....President of Content and Affiliate Services for National Media Groups, Clear Channel Media and Entertainment.  That does it for me.  How could you not accept the words of somebody with that position title?  "Content and Affiliate Services" must be PC verbology for fertilizer production.

[WOTR]

    Another theory is that we've all died and gone to hell.


...and if that's the case I say we chip in and get a cockroach on the next rover to that planet, call it an "astronaut," and be done with this fool.

I really had not considered myself to be worthy of living in hell; but it is a plausible explanation.


Do you have an estimate on the cost to get a cockroach to Mars? I will start saving to send George on that long, interplanetary vacation.

[bateman]

Premiere has made it abundantly clear that they don't give a flying fuck about the quality of their programming.

http://www.premrad.com/pages/contact.html

[PB the Deplorable]

"The continued growth and success of Coast to Coast AM is a testament to George's incredible talent and dedication," stated Julie Talbott, President of Content and Affiliate Services for National Media Groups, Clear Channel Media and Entertainment. "Each year, George takes Coast to Coast AM to new heights, and we couldn't be happier to extend our partnership with him for years to come."

My understanding is Julie Talbott is also President of the Peter Principle in Broadcasting Society, and has been the annual recipient of their Shining Example award for the past 10 years.