George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[b_dubb]

Coast has become a country club for idiots and buffoons

[albrecht]

http://www.accuweather.com/en/weather-news/pacific-storm-to-bring-rain-fl/38156280
Norry will proclaim his "thought intention experiment" worked. And, likely, mention it "working too well" due to the minor landslides.
-GNS

[Designx]

Hmm mustache?

[/size]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QAjZaSlWG50[/size]

[narcissist noory]

Back to the suckfest
  One guest format, georgie has his work cut out for him

[Major Ed Damien]

Oh, sweet joy of Noorgasm.

George is never more idiotic, off-the-wall, off-putting, inappropriate, inarticulate, "un-bull-lee-bubble" than when he is talking to a scientist.

His last scientific interview with the biologist from Duke University left the poor woman scratching her head so much it's a wonder she doesn't have a permanent bald spot on her pretty noggin.

Who knows what lunar lunacies George will ask the ex-NASA official?  Who knows what planet George will be on tonight with his next dumb-assed question for our guest?  What black hole of fuckwittery will emerge from that awful black hole between his ears?

He isn't limited by time nor space.  And he's slower than the speed of dark.

I love you, George Noory, you big, ignorant hunka man.

And for once, my dear kooky friend, a worthy couplet:

You bewigged fool with the dyed mustache: benighted knight of the night/
Mentally bumping into every goddamned thing in sight

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

It's a good thing space fascinates George.

[Juan Cena]

 Snoory trying to comprehend Howard Bloom is like Dave Bowman trying to comprehend the Monolith.

[Major Ed Damien]

Amazing.

George once starred in a Japanese science-fiction movie.

He played the evil Krankor in "The Prince of Space."



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YEZfLlHbFDI

[NoMoreNoory]

Joorch asked Bloom about the new Al-Quaeda threat. Bloom went off on one of his stream-of-consciousness pieces which was confused and confusing but seemed to be promoting the idea of a Pax Americana as the only way to keep the world in peace. I was intrigued to hear where that was going, but we'll never know. Joorch presumably got bored, or just wasn't listening, and completely cut across Bloom with a non-sequitur question about this record-breaking Cyber Monday and the implications of that for bricks-and-mortar stores...
It's going to be a loooooong night.


-GNS

[Major Ed Damien]

During George's news, he said that Al Qaeda may attack during Christmas "at the U.K. level."

The U.K. isn't even a country in George's faulty cranial processing unit.  It's only a unit of measure, turned to with a knob.

[Mind Flayer Monk]

George once starred in a Japanese science-fiction movie.

He played the evil Krankor in "The Prince of Space."

I doubt it. Krankor has a silent nobility about him. And his performance brings gravitas to an otherwise silly movie.
Also, notice the sparkle of intelligence in Krankor's eye.
Krankor correctly pronounced "caustic", something GN could never do.

[Juan Cena]

Joorch asked Bloom about the new Al-Quaeda threat. Bloom went off on one of his stream-of-consciousness pieces which was confused and confusing but seemed to be promoting the idea of a Pax Americana as the only way to keep the world in peace. I was intrigued to hear where that was going, but we'll never know. Joorch presumably got bored, or just wasn't listening, and completely cut across Bloom with a non-sequitur question about this record-breaking Cyber Monday and the implications of that for bricks-and-mortar stores...
It's going to be a loooooong night.


-GNS

The ironic thing is Snorge referred to this as a "conversation" with Bloom.

[zeebo]

The ironic thing is Snorge referred to this as a "conversation" with Bloom.

He does the same thing with LMH, when all he does is play her taped convos with someone else.

[michio]

I had a feeling that Mishy Shedlot's imminent appearance with his usual economic downer news segment would be "eminent" suck. sNoory doesn't disappoint.

[narcissist noory]

I had a feeling that Mishy Shedlot's imminent appearance with his usual economic downer news segment would be "eminent" suck. sNoory doesn't disappoint.

night after night, georgie exceeds all expectations of what it means to truly suck

[Mind Flayer Monk]

Social Nutworking?

[Major Ed Damien]

Bloom:  "A hammer can be used to build a house.  It can also be used to kill someone."

George (inner voice):  "I don't get it.  Why would a house want to kill someone?  Howard never makes any sense."

[narcissist noory]

GN-" whenever i microwave anything i stand wayyy to the side"

[Major Ed Damien]

George uses a stick with a mannequin's hand attached to it whenever he wants to deal with a microwave oven.

[Major Ed Damien]

"Howard, you should have been bed-ridden for fifteen years on a Sleep Number Bed."

[Major Ed Damien]

George really needs to hit Howard in his nut-grid with the solar flare scare.

[NoMoreNoory]

Jesus. Joorch tells Bloom that when he microwaves anything - primarily to defrost - he pushes the Start button and then steps away to the side to avoid being hit with cancer-causing microwaves. He's how old, now? Seven? FFS. Can you imagine? He pops in the pizza rolls, hits start, and runs around the far side of the fridge or something, grabbing the tin foil hat as he goes. There he cowers, until the All-Clear has sounded and he gingerly creeps out to grab his Late-Night Snack. What a moron.

[Major Ed Damien]

Jesus. Joorch tells Bloom that when he microwaves anything - primarily to defrost - he pushes the Start button and then steps away to the side to avoid being hit with cancer-causing microwaves. He's how old, now? Seven? FFS. Can you imagine? He pops in the pizza rolls, hits start, and runs around the far side of the fridge or something, grabbing the tin foil hat as he goes. There he cowers, until the All-Clear has sounded and he gingerly creeps out to grab his Late-Night Snack. What a moron.

George is living proof of an important scientific principle:

The bigger and more frightening the microwave oven, the more micro the mind.

[Major Ed Damien]

This dumbass once burned his esophagus with a microwaved pizza roll because he was too stupid to read the instructions on a box.  Who in the hell wants HIM as an expert on ANYTHING, let alone microwave ovens?

[narcissist noory]

Tonight george postulates that there might be life in other solar systems and is amazed he can't see it with his naked eye

[NoMoreNoory]

This dumbass once burned his esophagus with a microwaved pizza roll because he was too stupid to read the instructions on a box.  Who in the hell wants HIM as an expert on ANYTHING, let alone microwave ovens?

Edit: George has no idea what his esophagus is. Remember he told us he burnt his 'little flapper thingy'.

[norrykilledc2c]

Back to the suckfest
 

Whenever George announces an upcoming guest, I hear "more assholes for your suckfest" from the Reno 911 movie.

The best part is 0:40 - 0:50.


Reno 911 Miami Suck Fest Hotel Scene

[zeebo]

This astrobiology guest sounds promising.  This worries me.  Chances of another Noory-patented missed opportunity is rising.

[narcissist noory]

Edit: George has no idea what his esophagus is. Remember he told us he burnt his 'little flapper thingy'.

You simply couldn't make this shit up!

[Major Ed Damien]

George and his wonderful primordial soup revelation.  Thank god it got nowhere near a microwave oven.