George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[pate]

Social Nutworking?

Social NutSucking, it's what him and Tommee do when they skip out early on Fridays...

[pate]

... Again with "We have more firepower in our smartphones than the Apollo......" ...

Why do I envision Simple Jorch running around in a Zorro costume with his smartphone going "pew! pew! pew!" then getting beaten up by the neighborhood 12-year old bully?  (Note:  in this vision Simple Jorch is his current age...)

[AvDaBr]

Am I the only one who can't believe Howard Bloom does 450 pushups?

[Morgus]

Am I the only one who can't believe Howard Bloom does 450 pushups?

Noory thought he meant this kind of pushup?

[narcissist noory]

Jeez, even Dinovite's starting to sound good by comparison.

itchy..sticky..smelly..gooey

[narcissist noory]

Am I the only one who can't believe Howard Bloom does 450 pushups?

It's the part where he does them in eight minutes flat that i have to call bullshit on

[Nick el Ass]

Noory thought he meant this kind of pushup?

Mmmmmmm, orangey goodness. My guess is the only push ups Noory does involves Tommy sitting on top of him while screaming one more set before you get those pizza rolls George.

[coaster]

itchy..sticky..smelly..gooey

For some reason when I read this I imagine Tom Danheiser's couch cushions.

[Major Ed Damien]

George (speaking about a computer virus making news):  "We'll just wait and see how this thing unfolds."

Oh, yeah, right.  I guess we'll be doing that for everything that happens in the world.

Damn.  I was just waiting for George's "unfolding" thingy to unfold.

[Major Ed Damien]

I think George gave "Coast-to-Coast AM" a virus.

It's called "winzip/dimwit."

[Major Ed Damien]

Listen for how Katherine Albrecht pronounces "Mark of the Beast."

In her innocent, five-year-old voice it sounds like a new outfit for Barbie.

Or a delicious new Pop Tart.

What a nutcake she is.

[Major Ed Damien]

My god, credit cards were once the Mark of the Beast?

Is she snorting oven cleaner?

[Major Ed Damien]

"We have to acknowledge the existence of the Devil."

I'll acknowledge deviled eggs and devil's food cake.

Goddamn, they taste good.  I don't care if I go to hell for them.

[Major Ed Damien]

When you listen to Katherine Albrecht, you get an idea of what living in a theological state like Iran must be like.

She's a Shi'ite Baptist from the Christian Republic of Holy Roller.

Now George is playing "Rebel Rebel" by David Bowie.

"Got your mother in a whirl/
She's not sure if you're a boy or a girl."

"Hot tramp, I love you so."

Katherine must be crapping in her chastity bucket.

[Major Ed Damien]

This program has degenerated from being "The 700 Club" to lurching crazily into "The 666 Club."

[Major Ed Damien]

George said his credit card "was going to put in a fraudulent activity"?

Huh?

Oh, I get it.  He meant "a fraudulent activity report."

That goddamned moron.

He's the Mark of the Dumbassed Beast.

[Nick el Ass]

This program has degenerated from being "The 700 Club" to lurching crazily into "The 666 Club."

Worship the Noory!!!

[NoMoreNoory]

This absolutely infuriates me. Outside of a God Channel, is there any other place where a deranged lunatic like Albrecht can be given a national, nay global, platform to spout this drivel and have it go not only unchallenged and unquestioned but simply rubber-stamped by a soi-disant major talk show host? It's appalling. An abdication of all duty and responsibility by Noory.
So Noory was the victim of fraud and someone made a few online purchases using his credit card. So what? That's annoying, but common or garden. Only in the head of someone suffering from a serious mental illness could that have anything to do with some guy raving on a Greek rock two thousand years ago.

[Major Ed Damien]

Worship the Noory!!!

Pat always looks like he's taking a shit whenever he's praying.

[zeebo]

I don't get it.  Is this show about Facebook or Revelations?

[Major Ed Damien]

This absolutely infuriates me. Outside of a God Channel, is there any other place where a deranged lunatic like Albrecht can be given a national, nay global, platform to spout this drivel and have it go not only unchallenged and unquestioned but simply rubber-stamped by a soi-disant major talk show host? It's appalling. An abdication of all duty and responsibility by Noory.
So Noory was the victim of fraud and someone made a few online purchases using his credit card. So what? That's annoying, but common or garden. Only in the head of someone suffering from a serious mental illness could that have anything to do with some guy raving on a Greek rock two thousand years ago.

Katherine has one word for you:

"Oooooh."

[Nick el Ass]

Pat always looks like he's taking a shit whenever he's praying.

I always thought he was doing his best Yoda impersonation myself.

[PB the Deplorable]

This program has degenerated from being "The 700 Club" to lurching crazily lazily into "The 666 Club."

Fixed

[Major Ed Damien]

If there is a god, I can't imagine him wanting anything to do with this carping twinkie.

[Major Ed Damien]

Damn, Mickey Mouse is Satan.

This woman has shown me the light.

Too bad it's the light of darkness and crazy shit.

[Nick el Ass]

Damn, Mickey Mouse is Satan.

This woman has shown me the light.

Too bad it's the light of darkness and crazy shit.

Of course he is.

[Major Ed Damien]

Katherine Albrecht:  "The Mark of the Beast isn't going to come looking like a steaming plate of dog poo."

No, that would be Dinovite.

[Major Ed Damien]

Of course he is.

Mickey never should have been given Dinovite.

Now, he's not even Mickey Mouse.

He's the Mark of the Mouse.

[zeebo]

Strange, I always figured Lisa Simpson was an athiest, or at least agnostic.

[NoMoreNoory]

'The Mark of The Beast is not going to come like a plate of steaming dog poo'


Speechless.


Seriously, I'm lost. What exactly is this awful thing that Disney or supermarket check-outs are supposed to be doing? I'm trying to understand what exactly her point is. And since Noory won't ask, I suspect I'm going to be none the wiser.