George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[PhantasticSanShiSan]

I think that it just comes down to the fact that some folks believe in the "Anything's Better Then Noory" mantra. Personally, I like the one that goes "There are 2 kinds of people in this world: George Noory, and those who wish they were."

[Meegle]

Or my belief which is...

There are two types of people in the world: Those that are George Noory and those that aren't.

[Frys Girl]

Why can't George Noory pronounce words? If you have a gig like Coast to Toast, you MUST be able to pronounce Horror. Sorry. You do. I keep hearing whore whore whore. Idiot! Imbecile!

I used my powers: Welcome to Fast Blast, where you can send one message to the host per 30 minute period. Please note that we log your IP address and other identifying information with your message.
Your Fast Blast message has been sent.

[Frys Girl]

I only have a few days left on my coast to toast account, which I might miss only because I love those Art archives they have. But I plan on using it judiciously. That is, I will use my fast blast powers to send him links to our banners and topics. Hopefully we'll get some debate going

[Spikegirl]

Why can't George Noory pronounce words? If you have a gig like Coast to Toast, you MUST be able to pronounce Horror. Sorry. You do. I keep hearing whore whore whore. Idiot! Imbecile!

I'm sure George must be used to A LOT of fast blasts like this.

[EvB]

I'm sure George must be used to A LOT of fast blasts like this.

If I understand it correctly - Fast Blasts show up like IMs -- how much you wanna bet George doesn't read 'em?  That is, unless they flatter and the Tommy passes them along.

[PhantasticSanShiSan]

Happy Halloween!!!

Thurs. October 30 - Night of the Snoring Dead

"Fright Week" Thursday night begins with news.  Steve Fosset's tennis shoes, drivers license, and possibly some bones found 2 miles from his crash site - seems coyotes like BBQ too.  Leaf Phoenix decides to retire from acting at 34 *did he ever really start? Really?*  Thanks to a court ruling in France, French President Nikolas Sarkozy fails to block sales of sets of pins and voodoo dolls of his likeness*Some claim that in response to the ruling, Sarkozy had this to say - "You Pricks!"*

First hour guest author David Skal let's us all in on a big secret - People like to be scared. Noory displays his industry knowledge by claiming that Hollywood scares are "cheap programming with huge returns." Skal agrees that the returns are pretty much surefire but that many recent fright flix have had monster budgets*<- you see what I did there - scares, fright, monster...huh? huh?*.  Skal explains that things that are really scary to us are scenarios based in reality.  Many early horror films were actually allegories of real world situations.  The two discuss the transformation of Dracula's image.  George asks "How did the Nosferatu aspect of the Dracula phenomena end up? How did it start?"*? ? ? ? ?*  Next up - Frankenstein.  George asks "How did that evolve?" *Have you heard of books brotha?* and get's a laugh out of the fact that Bela Lugosi was forever typecast after playing Dracula. Karloff, Lon Chaney sr., Claude Raines are all discussed.

Spotlight guest, author Dr. Bob Curran comes to entertain and mystify us with Zombie lore. He and George gloss over lore origins from Egypt, Vikings, Celts, Medieval England, and the Caribbean. They talk about Wade Davis, Haiti and possible "zombiefying poisons".  The medical condition catalepsy is expounded upon.  Grave robbing and the medical professions growing need for dissection corpses.  "Half-hanged" resuscitated humans with slight brain damage adding to the view of the "shambling dead/zombie" imagery.  The growth of the lore in U.S. cities built on the slave trade, such as New Orleans and  Charleston SC.  Talk then drifts into the ties between Zombies and Vampires, and symbolic connections between the novel Dracula and the Irish state of mind during the time of the novels publication.  Myths and Facts of Vlad "Dracula" Tepes. Jewish Golems, and Sumerian death priests and conclaves of the dead.  Dr. Curran talks about certain muquarrabin -"lost shamans" who could summon the physical forms of the dead.  Apparently they were last photographed in the 1920's, and then subsequently disappeared from existence. Ze NightHawk responds "What do you mean disappeared? Where did they go?" They finish up with cities built by Djinn where armys of the dead could be gathered to await the final conflict.  The outlawed living mummies of Japan.  Demon Dogs.

George's Gem of the Night - Curran tells a story involving a female zobie.  Noory asks if there are more reports/tales of one sex over the other in history.
George - "You hear these tales of zombie women running around.  Is that the case more so then men?"
Curran - "I'd say it's about 50-50.  You have these tales of zombie women running around......because..."
George - "I've known a few."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

[Frys Girl]

OH my god. I couldn't stand to listen to that. It was so cheesy and awful. I can't believe he said that about zombies.
Why is this guy on radio still? It makes no sense.

[EvB]

You know - I was about to say how PLEASED I was that 33 had learned to use the picture-link function. 

Operative word: WAS

GROSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!   

[Frys Girl]

I'm beginning to wonder what this number 33 stands for. I have some ideas, but they can't be right.

[EvB]

I'm beginning to wonder what this number 33 stands for. I have some ideas, but they can't be right.

It's just another nick-name.  English translation of part of the one he uses here.  Sorry if I let a cat out of a bag - Phan . . .

[Frys Girl]

My account is closed now, and they sent me an e-mail already asking me to come back.

[Duckling Hunter]

Someone should start a tally for every time George references those damn Night Vision Goggles, TWO..TWO UFO's, TRAVELING AT 90 DEGREE ANGLES!

[Frys Girl]

1:42AM Thursday night. Listen this is ridiculous. George's stupid UFO guest tonight, i dont know who, said that Anderson Cooper said something on Fox News Channel and that Obama picked Leon Podesta as Chief of Staff. Both wrong, both undisputed by Snoory.

Then he goes "Anderson cooper asked an analyst if they will brief obama about the aliens. George it's getting in the main stream." Snoory asks "Are you sure it wasn't about the border?"
"no it was about roswell."
What a bullshit show. I feel sorry for anyone who is taking this show seriously. I really do. There was that one lady who wanted to kill herself until She called snoors and he consoled her out of it. That's sad on so many levels. I wonder if snoory planted that call.

[Duckling Hunter]

I heard that one as well, I can just imagine the blank look George had on his face until they started playing the Voice Recordings...Challenge your Guests to have a little accountability, Albino Cooper is obviously on CNN.

[Frys Girl]

The guest listens to the news, but not carefully. Podesta is in the transition team, but he's not the the chief of staff. Snoors and his "fact checking" team are on it, i'm sure.

[Meegle]

Hey all,

I'm still here.

I was listening last night and one second into the show George says, "Las Vay Ix".

Of course he meant to say Las Vegas. I was stunned. ONE SECOND into the show. I HAD to write George:

George,

Did you realize that one second into the show you said Las Vay Ix Nevada?
George, seriously what is your problem with words....like Vegas?     
But Vay IX?    It is SO hard to listen to you and all the slurring.

Seriously.

Well he responded (or someone did). Wanna know his response?

"???v"

The sheer eloquence!

Ijit!

[Frys Girl]

You got a response? You know what's sad? Rush Limbaugh probably still takes his happy pills and he doesn't slur but George probably doesn't smoke or drink or do recreational drugs and he still fucks up right and left.

[EvB]

You know - I did get an email from George once.  I was new to C2C - I don't know how long George had been in the driver's seat.  He sent out, to a bunch of people I imagine unless he just happened to pick my email off the streamlink list at random - one of those internet "HOAX" links (this one was funny at the time - old hat now - having to do with how your driver's license had been posted on the web and ou end up at a page -- after a few in betweens - with a picture of an ape on a driver's license)

I sent him a return E that only said:

BAD BOY! ;-)

And, got a reply, that said  . . . wait for it:

"I love it!"

At the time I was amused.  Actually - even in retrospect I'm amused.  But knowing more aobut him now, eh - well - you know. 

[Frys Girl]

That was a great story. I think George is a robot. Always repeating the same lines all these years.

[Meegle]

These are from random shows from last week...


"...welcome to cose to cose day m..."


"...tocking to the dead..."


"...hello due you..."          (to)


"...you only have innow until...." (now)


"...he later dedicated mudge of his work to..."    ( I don't like George very mudge )


"..he's also spent several days camped around dare e ah 51..."


"...mountains of the Monk-golian/Chinese border..."


"...muh-bee you got your shot of hang grrr eighteen..."                    (Hanger)


"...paranorbal research..."


"...buh I when into brat casting so that I could tock to peepa like you..."        (Brat is to wurst as wurst is to worst)


"...were gonna get into some buv your research..."


"...now that sounded like a lair nix problem..." (Actually sounds like someone with a tongue problem because I think it's pronounced Layer Inks....right?)


"FROM LAS VAY IX NEVADA...!!!"                 (One second into the show)


"General Motors the nations largest otto maker..."


Linda Moulton Howe: "It is great to be looking at your eyes and you're wearing this great chocolate striped shirt..." (George/Linda - 2 great tastes that go great together?)


"It's really sobering to see people out there that keer so much about this subject."


"Do you remuhmber Close Encounters of the Third Kind and they're in Africa and they hear the 5 tone NA NA NA NA NA and they all point to the sky?"                                        (Why is this or 'Fire in the Sky' always George's references?)



More to come (fortunately or unfortunately)

[Meegle]

Tuesday November 11th, 2008



"...good morning good eve ding..."


"...and once again credits say it just doesn't seem to go far enough. The plan announced by federal officials and morgan giants Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac sounds sweeping in it's approach. Bowwers would get reduced interest rates and longer loan terms..."       (Credits=Critics,  Morgan=Mortgage,  Bowwers= Borrowers)


"...in U.S. otto sales..."


"...Vet trins day daday..."         (Veterans day today)


"...peepa are concerned aboud their how wusses..."         (People, About, Houses)


"...Jevree..."            (Jeffrey)


..................................yawn.................................

[Frys Girl]

ROFL this was an amazing set!!!!!!!! Meegle me hearts you long time for the "chocolate stripes". LOL. Way too much info!

[Meegle]

Monday November 10th, 2008


Another crackpot Chicken-Little show...



"Will there be any changes with this adbinistration?"

"...we canna afford the uddamobile inustry to go under."

"...ok back to what Obumma might do..."

"And I would guess they would be pretty buhlarge ones."

"..................you ka.............ok......................?"      (This was George's response to something pretty scientific.)

"...when we come back we'll alsa tock about prophecy.........OH YES.......prophecy."

"...course as you know I don't buhlieve in coincidences."         ( Well......really?)

"...I don't think they would spend jussa couple a million dahlers on simply exspuriments."

"If Apocalypto, that movie, was accurate then..."              (It wasn't you moron.)

"...and the Hopi Inii uhns..."         (Indians)

"...his map is jramatically altered..."          (Dra! Dra! DRAMATICALLY!)


Chicken-Little is always dramatic.

[Meegle]

Thanks FryBaby!!!

[Meegle]

Thursday November 13th, 2008


"....after jriving it down to..."                  (Driving)


"..and that struck up kra kra great friendship..."


"...after three days ofsssssssselling..."


"...an alumnus of Florida A nuh nem University..."     
                                       (2 minutes in the show)


"...Anjoo watta you thinka this..."          (Andrew? Andre?)


"...killed over haffa million peepa anya lee..."        (Anally?)


"...they said is kids were malnurshed..."      (His, Malnourished)


"...he hid in the lawn-jree room...and jumped indo the FedEx bawx..."


"...I think suz."        (Me too?)


"...they cud stay there almos permanently..."               (Mmmmmm...cud)


"...and a reminder my Sci Fi telefish television show..."       
                                            (Tele = across , Fish = fish)


"...middight Mountain time..."   


"...where whir tocking about the show called 'Direk from dthe
Mooooon'...."        (We're, Direct from the Moon)


"...that's incherusin..."              (IN TER EST ING)


___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
George: "I notice that Buzz Aldrin is gonna be on the 'Direk from dthe
Moon' show and I was with Buzz on the Larry King show not too long ago."
Guest:
"..........mmhmmm."                                                                                                     
(So what?)
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________



"Well you know Edgar Mitchell za staunch buhliever in extraterres teal
life....AND I BUHLIEVE 'IM....CUZ I KNOW 'IM!!!"          (Name dropper
mispronouncer)


"I unerstand."            (There is no way that you do George.)


___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
George: "...without the gravuddy, will the astronauts be able tuh moove
aroun?"
Guest:   "....well now you have to remember that the moon does have
gravity..."                        (Imbecile)
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________



"Definutly wool be a learning cuhyurve..."


"...dan it's gone ketchup to war it's ben dan."                    (?)


"Do you recommen that?"


"Anahahow have theyd done that?"


"Dthat's pretty jramatic."             (George's new phrase.)


"...that's fantastic.....chrooly is."        (George wasn't listening)



___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Guest: "We can reduce cow farts which is reason enough to go to BioFuel."
George:
"Ok....uh..............."                                           (I
bet George could power a blimp with his 'emissions'.)
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________



"How didjoo gedincherested ind this Davuh?"                 
                               (Did, You, Get, Interested, In, This, David)



Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

[Frys Girl]

So last night I woke up at 2AM because I thought someone broke into my place and was looting the place and I turned on the radio after checking stuff out.

George's entire career became clear to me: it's all about him saying "there must be some scientific support for this" or "I bet there is some medical reason for that". It's not just speculation, it's wild and dumb speculation and it's not even interesting or creative! I know kids who can be more creative than George.

One guy called in about waking up during surgery and asked him about the anesthesia. Never-mind that George is not a doctor. He still had an answer: "Oh I'm sure they use different drugs for different surgeries."

[Meegle]

Hey Fry's Girl. I have to apologize. I didn't mean to wake you up and disturb you last night.

You had me at "Get out!".   

[Frys Girl]

LOL. If you want to steal stuff, don't drop the pots and pans!

This isn't the right folder to discuss it, but it was a coast to coast moment! It had to be a ghost!

[Meegle]

Monday November 17th, 2008



"...long lost reladiv..."


"...soffer from golf war illness..."


"...as you know Joyx..."      (Joyce)


"...urging Present Bush..."   


"..heebuh he lent him some money..."


"...your new show cording to Gordon..."


"...so they were ehduhdid down..."


"...he saved Chrysler buhcause he's brilly hunt..."


"...what the heck cappened?"


"...slowes they've ever seen Las Vegas...that's a barombetter Mish..."


"...you play duemorrow night..."


"..whir lookin' four do see what you ha to see saaaaay about this..."


"...sits my 'ole listen from my Nighthawk dies..."       ("For dark is the suede that mows like a harvest.")


"Waah lez go to Joe in Missouri, *click**click* Joe? *click**click**click* Joe? *click* You there? *click**click**click**click* Joe? Well.... *click**click**click* ...nothing's working..."                                                                                                                                 (dumbass)


"Stan touch!"         (Stay In)


"Hello! Huhwar you?"


"...will the documennary happen..."


"...this could have perfound impact on..."


"...now I wanchoo tuh painus a pitcher..."


"And unknown means what?"                (I got this wrong on the SAT as well.)



_________________________________________________________________
George: "Loyd I think we're the visitors."
Guest:    "................................................"
George: "..........I think we're the visitors."
Guest:    "................................................"
George: "We'll be right back."
________________________________________(Even the guest doesn't care.)__



"Loyd weren't you on an 'ole History Channel duckumentary...?"             (Yes...he's a quack!)


"Haakkuh they do this?"        (How could)


"What if the skull was some kinda projector and an if you could somehow turn it on it would show you the secrets of the Universe?"          (What if you George's skull was some kinda projector an if you could somehow turn it on it would show you old black and white cartoons from the 30's?)


"Now does a fish have the same ammomamoun of chromosomes as we do?"           
                                                  (Yes George, but we don't have as many scales.)