George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[Mops]

[guest] the powers that be might make a new generation of dumb people.

Well, George Noory must be one of the Illuminati then...

And now the Chinese want them dead. 

[The Professor]

Unfortunately, that's less realistic than the rest of their predictions. If the web bots picked my stocks, I'd be in the poorhouse right now.

Its convenient that they don't see any point to making money off their technology

[Noory] Your newsletter has gotten cheaper and cheaper over time, you can't be making much on this! That proves you're not in it for the money.

[The Professor]

I've coverted what the guests are saying into lingusitic archetypes, so you can see through their complex jargon:

"There's a sucker born every minute."

[Supernormal]

SuperN, you need to get a scorecard to keep track of your charlatans,
project merlin is totally different than webbots...


by the creators of The MERLIN Project -- Paul Guercio and Dr. George Hart
MERLIN is the first, scientifically-based forecasting technology that combines equations derived from celestial phenomena with past historical data and blends that information into a "timetrak(r)" that accurately plots the chronology of future events.  THE ART OF ANTICIPATION Surfing the Waves of Change in your Future

That's as clear as mud. It's like how the most boring jobs get the most complicated titles. I'll stick to reading tea leaves and coffee grounds. It's more scientific.

[The Professor]

Can Noory quite using his mind to bring rain, we've gotten into a heat wave here in LA...

[The Professor]

That's as clear as mud. It's like how the most boring jobs get the most complicated titles. I'll stick to reading tea leaves and coffee grounds. It's more scientific.

I'll stick with reverse-writing analysis.

[Mops]

Wonder if all of the periods and exclamation marks the web bots digest from the internet add up to 2012?

[Supernormal]

"There's a sucker born every minute."

George Voice: "I feel born again with each new show."
Barnum Voice: "That's my boy."

[Mops]

Can Noory quite using his mind to bring rain, we've gotten into a heat wave here in LA...

Send it back this way.  My rain gauge cracked from the heat/drought and the thermometer needle got stuck at 115 so I won't notice the difference.

[Mops]

It's not raining in San Antonio either.

[The Professor]

I tuned in late, is this show live, or is it a replay of any one of the last 5 times these guys were on? How about just a "best of web bots" next time...

[The Professor]

Ed Dames has got to be home kicking himself as he listens to this...

[Dames] Jeez---what are these hacks doing on instead of me?!? I would have predicted silver at $60,000 an ounce and a hundred times as many dead!!!

[The Professor]

[Caller] I stubbed my toe---do the web bots have anything to say about that?

[The Professor]

I don't know about the "contact meme", but I'm guessing you'd get a contact high if you shook hands with these guys...

[Mops]

I tuned in late, is this show live, or is it a replay of any one of the last 5 times these guys were on? How about just a "best of web bots" next time...

Could be a repeat.  They just mentioned something about the web bots predicting that Ted Williams will never hit .400 again.

[The Professor]

wow,  Noory is quick as a whip with his Twilight Zone episodes...maybe he watches them while the show is on....

[The Professor]

I think I might have a new career in lingo-web-botics...let me try:

On September 23, either Iceland will explode in a giant volcanic eruption, killing 65% of the world population, or North Korea will launch an all out nuclear stike on The Maldives, triggering a world-wide nuclear war, or, if not, at least some blogger out there will call for lower taxes.

[The Professor]

Lightning round!!!

[Noory] Any chatter on end times?

[Noory] Any chatter on Planet X?

[Noory] Any chatter on Angels?

[Noory] Any chatter on my next contract negotiation?

[Mops]

Magic pies.  Well why didn't they say so up front?

[The Professor]

Magic pies.  Well why didn't they say so up front?

"You got your problems...I got my hash pipe!"

(maybe they are Weezer fans)

[Supernormal]

I think I might have a new career in lingo-web-botics...let me try:

On September 23, either Iceland will explode in a giant volcanic eruption, killing 65% of the world population, or North Korea will launch an all out nuclear stike on The Maldives, triggering a world-wide nuclear war, or, if not, at least some blogger out there will call for lower taxes.

George can get that stuff over the phone. He just has to dial 1-900-SEX-DOOM.

[Mops]

I just realized there is an upside to advertisements.

[The Professor]

well, until next time, the lingusitic archetype is "Noory Sucks!"  <----come and
get it, web spiders!

[Supernormal]

Magic pies.  Well why didn't they say so up front?

Most of those predictions sound more like *cow* pies. The C2C bakery smells like the farms of Wisconsin.

[The Professor]

I just realized there is an upside to advertisements.

Yeah, Noory reading them is sort of like a dog on a leash...still makes a lot of noise, but won't dig up the tulips....

[The Professor]

Most of those predictions sound more like *cow* pies. The C2C bakery smells like the farms of Wisconsin.

but cow pies can at least be used for fertilizer...these guys produce toxic waste...

[The Professor]

Hey Texas!!! Pop over to the Refugees thread next door, we are doing Noory Science Theatre 3000 nightly there...we could use your straight-shooting Texas style...

[Mops]

Once again I can't rate tonight's program.  Another forfeit.  Neither side showed up............

[valdez]

     Cheney killed Bhutto?  The Iranian uprising was a plot by the British embassy in Tehran?  Ahmadinejad never said bad things about Israel?   Ian would have eaten these clowns alive.  Thank you, George, for allowing George Ure, and "Clif" (No last name?  Huh? Perhaps presently being hunted by the Mossad?), the WEB BOT BOYS  (july 22) to ramble unchecked for three hours. 

[KnyeGuy]

     Cheney killed Bhutto?  The Iranian uprising was a plot by the British embassy in Tehran?  Ahmadinejad never said bad things about Israel?   Ian would have eaten these clowns alive.  Thank you, George, for allowing George Ure, and "Clif" (No last name?  Huh? Perhaps presently being hunted by the Mossad?), the WEB BOT BOYS  (july 22) to ramble unchecked for three hours.

I wasn't listening too intensely (as usual), but I do recall them stating that Ahmadinejad's speech was taken out of context. I forget to what extent they went on about it, except for mentioning that the whole idea of him wanting to 'nuke' Israel was just pure sensationalization of his speech by the media. After looking up a transcript, it appears he made mention that the occupying regime of Israel needed to be wiped off the map, which of course can be interpreted to mean many things.
Gotta LOVE media spin.

At any rate, these 2 guys came across as pretty unreliable sources of info themselves, so yeah I can imagine that Ian would've torn them a new one.

One part I caught as well is where George went on about that episode of the twilight zone where the little girl is lost in another dimension (another ANNOYING thing he constantly makes reference to)... Instead of just mentioning it (which is bad enough) and then maybe perhaps actually asking some relevant questions, he had to slightly spin off on a tangent and state that the girls father 'did find her afterall.'  As lame as the guests were, you could tell they were mystified by this idiocy as well and kind of cut him off to resume the topic.
--I guess when you have no interest in the topic at hand, or a lack of attentiveness, it makes sense to bring up redundant tv references to at least sound like you're still awake, huh Georgie?--

I still cannot find even the lamest of guests entertaining when George is interviewing, because he always seems to TOP them.