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RELIGION Thread

Started by theONE, October 25, 2016, 03:51:49 AM


K_Dubb

Quote from: albrecht on August 29, 2020, 03:08:48 PM
   Sanhedrin Petitions to Govt to Blow Shofar on Temple Mount 

https://www.breakingisraelnews.com/157145/sanhedrin-petitions-to-govt-to-blow-shofar-on-temple-mount-for-first-time-since-temple-destruction/

I always get a kick out of the mystique around shofars, especially among Evangelicals -- I remember my 10th-grade prophecy/world history teacher playing a tape for us like it was heap big juju.  They are probably the first natural trumpets, universal to humanity since some bored caveman blew a raspberry into a discarded goat or antelope horn and figured out it made a loud noise.  But, like vestigial remnants in evolution, most peoples moved on to more sophisticated instruments while the natural trumpet survived either due to cultural conservatism, like the Jews, or isolation -- our bukkehorn is essentially dentical but was blown by poor herd-girls to scare away wolves.  It's just a wild vuvuzela.

albrecht

Quote from: K_Dubb on August 29, 2020, 04:32:41 PM
I always get a kick out of the mystique around shofars, especially among Evangelicals -- I remember my 10th-grade prophecy/world history teacher playing a tape for us like it was heap big juju.  They are probably the first natural trumpets, universal to humanity since some bored caveman blew a raspberry into a discarded goat or antelope horn and figured out it made a loud noise.  But, like vestigial remnants in evolution, most peoples moved on to more sophisticated instruments while the natural trumpet survived either due to cultural conservatism, like the Jews, or isolation -- our bukkehorn is essentially dentical but was blown by poor herd-girls to scare away wolves.  It's just a wild vuvuzela.
When the World Cup was in ZA that vuvuzela crap was amazing. Amazingly bad. I reminded me of during those times of the 17-year locusts (really cicadas) with the ferocity and noise but, oddly, something one could get used to- unless one thought about it. Then it could drive a person to madness. As if soccer wasn't bad and frustrating enough you had that incessant buzzing. No wonder there is hooliganism, riots, and wife-beating frequently associated with the sport.

K_Dubb

Quote from: albrecht on August 29, 2020, 04:41:50 PM
When the World Cup was in ZA that vuvuzela crap was amazing. Amazingly bad. I reminded me of during those times of the 17-year locusts (really cicadas) with the ferocity and noise but, oddly, something one could get used to- unless one thought about it. Then it could drive a person to madness. As if soccer wasn't bad and frustrating enough you had that incessant buzzing. No wonder there is hooliganism, riots, and wife-beating frequently associated with the sport.

Haha yeah I caught the beginning of one of their cycles I think it was 2004 in DC that was something else.  I should get a vuvuzela for my big sis in AK; there's a brown bear that has made sort of a seasonal camp under a couple of her trees.  She says he runs away from loud noises but always comes back.

AZZERAE

"Let not those who are niggardly with what Allah has granted them out of His bounty think that it is good for them. Indeed, it is evil for them. What they are niggardly about shall be hung about their necks like a collar on the day of Resurrection."

- Al-Imran, Verse 180

AZZERAE

"Avoid suspicion, for suspicion in some cases is sin. And spy not, neither backbite one another."

- Al-Hujurat, Verse 12



Dr. MD MD

Quote from: SpaceMeowMaid on October 03, 2020, 01:38:30 AM
I will just sit on their lap. Problem solved.

No, that’s not a gun in my pocket. I’m just happy to see you. :)

SpaceMeowMaid

Quote from: Dr. MD MD on October 03, 2020, 01:41:11 AM
No, that’s not a gun in my pocket. I’m just happy to see you. :)

Just think about dead baby bunnies. It'll make your chubby go away! See problem solving all over the place. Also you need some churchin up.

Dr. MD MD

Quote from: SpaceMeowMaid on October 03, 2020, 01:55:57 AM
Just think about dead baby bunnies. It'll make your chubby go away! See problem solving all over the place. Also you need some churchin up.







Innerreach

Quote from: Jackstar on January 05, 2021, 03:12:30 PMIs this going to be on the midterm?

Well, yes but, not for you Jackstar. ;)


pate


Apparently, this local pastor has caused a bit of a stir.  The local radio guys say it has gone viral nationally, Nautical Shore about that.

I love the "...I'm not worth your Red Lobster money?!..." bit.

I will reserve judgement until I hear Big Chicken's take on this...

-p

Juan

That reminds me - I need to check on Pastor Butch.

Jackstar

Quote from: Juan on August 22, 2022, 05:46:30 AMThat reminds me - I need to check on Pastor Butch.

Tell her I said, "Hi!"


pate

I experienced a Miracle the other day.

In the course of my weekly Property Maintenance for the old landlord dude I ran into three Brothers from the Little Brothers of the Lamb.

Two were from France, and the blind guy was from around hear.

Anyway, I always stop People of The Cloth and talk to them.  These brothers were decked out in their standard Blue Monk Cowl things and were probably on Mission.

We talked for awhile, I cracked jokes about me being a B-Teamer (Protestant) and them being A-Teamers (Catholic).  I massacred a little French with them, they were fascinated by my Reel Mower (except the blind one, I am going to hell, HAH!), and tried to figure out where in South of France I spent summer when I was a kid.

Apparently, they have a Monastery somewhere near Marseilles/Avignon.  Talked about the Papal Palace there, and other stuff.

We probably chatted for about a fifteen minutes, and since both they and myself were "On Mission" with Work to do they took off.

Before they did, they offered to sing me a blessing, which is apparently something they do for friends.  They did it in French, a cappella and it was incredible.

Something akin to this:


Only it was three brothers and not the entire choir.

While they were singing, I silently prayed a bit about something I had lost about a year ago that has really been bothering me ever since.

What do you suppose I found shortly thereafter?

I will tell you that the lost thing once belonged to my dead squad-brother that went down on the helicopter all those years ago...  And I have been searching EVERYWHERE for it, thought it was gone forever.

Anyway, I stopped by their local monastery today and told them the story.  I also said that if the Pope will accept Testimonials about Saintly Miracles from a heathen heretic Protestant, I wanted to make it Official as I think the three brothers are indeed Saints.

Their vow of humility of course prevented them from agreeing with me.

I am not converting to Catholicism;  but I am going to at least get them some of my mom's Red Oak logs for their wood-stove in the Monastery:  one of them was out back trying to split some green Elm "biscuits" which are Hell.

HAH.  They also invited me to some dinner thing they do every Saturday, haven't decided about that although I am considering teaching them how to bake some decent bread if they don't do that already.

Praise Kord Jaysus!

-p

K_Dubb

Quote from: pate on November 05, 2022, 08:01:38 PMI experienced a Miracle the other day.

In the course of my weekly Property Maintenance for the old landlord dude I ran into three Brothers from the Little Brothers of the Lamb.

Two were from France, and the blind guy was from around hear.

Anyway, I always stop People of The Cloth and talk to them.  These brothers were decked out in their standard Blue Monk Cowl things and were probably on Mission.

We talked for awhile, I cracked jokes about me being a B-Teamer (Protestant) and them being A-Teamers (Catholic).  I massacred a little French with them, they were fascinated by my Reel Mower (except the blind one, I am going to hell, HAH!), and tried to figure out where in South of France I spent summer when I was a kid.

Apparently, they have a Monastery somewhere near Marseilles/Avignon.  Talked about the Papal Palace there, and other stuff.

We probably chatted for about a fifteen minutes, and since both they and myself were "On Mission" with Work to do they took off.

Before they did, they offered to sing me a blessing, which is apparently something they do for friends.  They did it in French, a cappella and it was incredible.

Something akin to this:


Only it was three brothers and not the entire choir.

While they were singing, I silently prayed a bit about something I had lost about a year ago that has really been bothering me ever since.

What do you suppose I found shortly thereafter?

I will tell you that the lost thing once belonged to my dead squad-brother that went down on the helicopter all those years ago...  And I have been searching EVERYWHERE for it, thought it was gone forever.

Anyway, I stopped by their local monastery today and told them the story.  I also said that if the Pope will accept Testimonials about Saintly Miracles from a heathen heretic Protestant, I wanted to make it Official as I think the three brothers are indeed Saints.

Their vow of humility of course prevented them from agreeing with me.

I am not converting to Catholicism;  but I am going to at least get them some of my mom's Red Oak logs for their wood-stove in the Monastery:  one of them was out back trying to split some green Elm "biscuits" which are Hell.

HAH.  They also invited me to some dinner thing they do every Saturday, haven't decided about that although I am considering teaching them how to bake some decent bread if they don't do that already.

Praise Kord Jaysus!

-p

🙏

Mom was just telling me about a time my dad sat next to two Catholic priests on a flight back from SLC and naturally talked religion all the way back, ended up offering them a ride from the airport since he decided they were ok, "more in common with them than I realized".

pate

Quote from: K_Dubb on November 06, 2022, 02:01:13 PM🙏

Mom was just telling me about a time my dad sat next to two Catholic priests on a flight back from SLC and naturally talked religion all the way back, ended up offering them a ride from the airport since he decided they were ok, "more in common with them than I realized".

I believe the word "catholic" in Latin actually means "common" or something like that...

-p

pate


This will probably be removed from the Vidya-Toob by themthe hobo elite, probably the Pope will order it or something.

Clearly heretical content, watch at your Immortal Soul's risk.

-p


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