George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[Nick el Ass]

Dipshit Dave needs to realize that Beyond Suck is not a tv show.

[Nick el Ass]

Name dropping, hahaha.

[Morgus]

Dipshit Dave needs to realize that Beyond Suck is not a tv show.

Noory thinks because you can view that internet streaming videocast on a flat panel big screen TV by hooking up a Roku, that makes it a TV show.
If true, then so is a youtube video showing a cat meowing... 

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

Jorch hypnotized the hypnosis guy.

Guest (after the show):  "He somehow hypnotized me.  I remember yawning, and when I came out of it, I was drooling and had shit my pants."

I think both the host and the guest are under self-hypnosis.

[Major Ed Damien]

Jorch:  "Could hypnosis cure my constipation?  I would like to be put under to go doo doo."

[Dateline]

Noory thinks because you can view that internet streaming videocast on a flat panel big screen TV by hooking up a Roku, that makes it a TV show.
If true, then so is a youtube video showing a cat meowing... 

In the same vein, Falkie has his on TV show, if you follow the beyond belief that Norry is telling.

[Dateline]

Stay tuned!  The website will be revised even more.  The name is going to be changed to Fade to Suck in honor of Norry's newest bested friend behind Greg the Cook, Jimmy the Lurch.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

I dunno, it is on a regular schedule like a TV show.  I figure let him have his fun calling it that.

[Major Ed Damien]

Jorch decides to use what he's learned about hypnosis to try and get into Linda Moulton Howe's pants.

Off the air -- thanks to her fatigue and Jorch's boring voice -- he finally manages to get her into a hypnotic trance.

Jorch:  "Will you let me have sex with you now?"

Linda Moulton Howe:  "Mooooooooo."

Jorch:  "OK . . . does one 'mooooo' mean 'yes?'"

[goldendeal]

Jorch decides to use what he's learned about hypnosis to try and get into Linda Moulton Howe's pants.

Off the air -- thanks to her fatigue and Jorch's boring voice -- he finally manages to get her into a hypnotic trance.

Jorch:  "Will you let me have sex with you now?"

Linda Moulton Howe:  "Mooooooooo."

Jorch:  "OK . . . does one 'mooooo' mean 'yes?'"

Linda Moulton Howe:  "Mooooooooo." means maybe; how much air time??

[Morgus]

Ugh, Noory ended this 2 hour hypnosis session on the air with his attempt at a hypnotic voice saying "you will listen to this show for a hundred years"
Noory must think he is now an ageless vampire who will still be hosting a century from now?

[Nick el Ass]

Ugh, Noory ended this 2 hour hypnosis session on the air with his attempt at a hypnotic voice saying "you will listen to this show for a hundred years"
Noory must think he is now an ageless vampire who will still be hosting a century from now?

He must be aware that his ratings are slipping with each passing month, and figured it was worth a shot especially with Art returning in July.

[Major Ed Damien]

Guest says "idear" for "idea."

Looks like we've got problems.

[Nick el Ass]

My mind can't comprehend how Noorie keeps his job.

[Major Ed Damien]

The fact that somebody as dimly lit as Jorch Noory doesn't accept the Big Bang Theory makes me accept it even more.

Go figure.

[Major Ed Damien]

Jorch:  "I'm a believer in intelligent design."


Impossible.  Something had to have designed Jorch, and it was as stupid as fuck all.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

This guy is claiming he came up with the idea of particles being generated from vacuum energy 20 years ago?  That was part of Dr. Alan Guth's widely accepted Inflation Theory from the early 1980s.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

The Big Bang Theory doesn't say how the Universe started.  The recent paper doesn't contradict it.  Noory and his guest are useless.

[Nick el Ass]

Jorch:  "I'm a believer in intelligent design."


Impossible.  Something had to have designed Jorch, and it was as stupid as fuck all.

Maybe God just needed a good laugh, and created this bumbling imbecile for that reason alone.

[Major Ed Damien]

The Big Bang Theory doesn't say how the Universe started.  The recent paper doesn't contradict it.  Noory and his guest are useless.

GFP, don't piss on another man's idears like that.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

GFP, don't piss on another man's idears like that.

[Falkie2013]

This guy is claiming he came up with the idea of particles being generated from vacuum energy 20 years ago?  That was part of Dr. Alan Guth's widely accepted Inflation Theory from the early 1980s.

Noory's knowledge of the universe probably coomes from the Hoover theory, the noise that the C2C janitor makes every time he uses the vacuum to clean up all the turkey sammich and pizza roll crumbs in George's studio after the show.

[Major Ed Damien]

Identity thief who stole Jorch Noory's identity:  "Awww, shit . . . now everybody's going to think I'm stupid."

[Nick el Ass]

Identity thief who stole Jorch Noory's identity:  "Awww, shit . . . now everybody's going to think I'm stupid."

A thief would probably see what he has been up to, and give his identity back.

[nextgen.fm]

I had to turn the Show off driving home

I turned on 740am out of Canada some good oldies

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

From the Rational Wiki entry for Nassim Haramein:

...Despite his claims, he's virtually unknown to mainstream physics, and the only people who take him seriously are the kind of people who listen to Coast to Coast AM.[2]

[Major Ed Damien]

Whenever Jorch has heard something he obviously doesn't understand he always says:

"Well, that's certainly true, too."

[Nick el Ass]

I think the guest is coughing from the joint he is smoking while the show is going on.

[Major Ed Damien]

Does anybody else see the endless humor possibilities here?

We have a goofball wearing a bad wig -- and who doesn't know his ass from a black hole -- discussing physical cosmology.

[Nick el Ass]

I find it hilarious that they found someone who is just as hard to understand at times as George is to be a guest.