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George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

Started by MV/Liberace!, April 06, 2008, 01:23:02 AM

Can Noory pronounce anything correctly?

No
No

Zircon

Quote from: ziznak on August 04, 2012, 02:25:48 AM

This new age fagotry has reached new heights... it's def the crop circle playing yer harp not the frigging wind we can hear blowing in the background... I can stick a guitar in front of a fan and it will do the same thing does that mean my fan is playing cosmic music???

I'd rather hear the harp than Georgies singing though... for sure.
Yes, this guy's "twat quotient" is pinging off the charts. I wonder if Tony the Tiger can ever be heard playing since corn grows in a field. I wonder if this is how Sugar Frosted Flakes are actually made? Need to get Linda Molton (or Moron) Howe on this and report back to George. Might help solve food problems in the upcoming calamity.

DebbyS

Quote from: Sardondi on August 03, 2012, 12:38:16 AM
If it just gets too unbearable I see a very simple solution, and it's not changing this to a Birdwatchers of America site.

Drat. See picture to your left. I took it myself. I love Kingbirds; they so enjoy their food.  I like birds a lot more than Jorge Cabeza de Snoro.

NoMoreNoory

Quote from: DangerousBlossom on August 04, 2012, 03:31:32 AM
I kind of turned off my ears after hearing the phrase “quantum nutrition” from the guest.   ::)

Sterling also comes up with 'quantum visioneering' in a hilarious interview on You Tube. What a fantastic wheeze when you're a barely average musician, to claim that it's angels/crop circles/the wind actually playing your instrument. Given the amount of wind Noory blows out of his ass on a nightly basis, they'd make a great duo. And if by any chance he's right and it is the angels thrumming his strings, it only confirms my belief that Heaven would (were it to exist) be the dullest place imaginable, with the most mind-numbing MOR New Age soundtrack to accompany it.
Did anyone hear him play shortly before a break and Noory declare in hushed tones 'It certainly sounds angelic, doesn't it'? Barf bucket, please.
This man is to the harp what Richard Clayderman is to the piano. Reminds you how great Harpo was. Your angelic challenge is to attempt to get through all 7 minutes of this pap without either falling asleep or opening a vein.


Peter Sterling "The Sands of Time"


b_dubb

Quote from: Camazotz Automat on August 04, 2012, 02:14:19 AM
That pretty much sums up how I felt when still listening to the show.

I've tried turmeric, after reading about claimed anti-inflammatory properties - however, when I burped, it tasted like my 1911 edition, 15 Volume collection of the complete works of Jules Verne.

So there's a definite trade off there.   ;)
you should be taking your supplements with meals. never on their own

ziznak

Quote from: MV on August 04, 2012, 10:45:46 AM
what the fuck?
He's performing an exorcism by harp... you'd think his musician schtick or the fact that he's hanging out with new age hippy chicks would be enough to get him laid but nah...
he's got a backup plan!

This just in.

Harpist Peter Sterling's first great inspiration revealed in a recent crop circle podcast interview.

Also, there are rumors that John B. Wells believes he looks like this to the world, especially if he's recently traveled on the Great Green Express.

[attachimg=1]

Quote from: Morgus on August 04, 2012, 02:18:12 AM
How sickening: Noory just mentioned on the air in the final hour tonight that he has been asked to produce and record an audio CD of his own singing songs...


It's true.  I for one have urged he do this.  And all this time I had the impression they weren't reading my emails anymore.


CoastCanuck

Quote from: Morgus on August 04, 2012, 02:18:12 AM
How sickening: Noory just mentioned on the air in the final hour tonight that he has been asked to produce and record an audio CD of his own singing songs...
This could open up a new door for Noory, if successful.  Concert tours, backstage female fans, more money... he'd be so busy he would have to retire from C2C.

Morgus

Quote from: CoastCanuck on August 04, 2012, 02:03:22 PM
This could open up a new door for Noory, if successful.  Concert tours, backstage female fans, more money... he'd be so busy he would have to retire from C2C.
or more likely will just result in another freebie CD to pass out to new streamlink (coast insider) subscribers, like they did in the past with an audio cd of Noory reading short stories like Edgar Allan Poe...  :P

b_dubb

Quote from: Morgus on August 04, 2012, 02:42:30 PM
or more likely will just result in another freebie CD to pass out to new streamlink (coast insider) subscribers, like they did in the past with an audio cd of Noory reading short stories like Edgar Allan Poe...  :P
you ARE kidding ... right?

Quote from: nooronhorizontal space Once apron a midnight deary, while I pandered wake and wearing a trench quote ...

Quote from: CoastCanuck on August 04, 2012, 02:03:22 PM
This could open up a new door for Noory, if successful.  Concert tours, backstage female fans, more money... he'd be so busy he would have to retire from C2C.


Picture the very hip George Noory, center judge seat on Idol between Randy and Mariah, matching wits with Richard C, er, Ryan Seacrest...

Sardondi

Quote from: Morgus on August 04, 2012, 02:18:12 AM
How sickening: Noory just mentioned on the air in the final hour tonight that he has been asked to produce and record an audio CD of his own singing songs...

Yep, you had to see this coming when he started the "by request" butchery of Elvis songs.

Quote from: DebbyS on August 04, 2012, 06:43:39 AM
Drat. See picture to your left. I took it myself. I love Kingbirds; they so enjoy their food.  I like birds a lot more than Jorge Cabeza de Snoro.

Heh. Love the birds; just don't want the site changed to be about their worship....or to a site about Swedish land use, or rates of syphilis among the 15th century priests for that matter.

Quote from: Camazotz Automat on August 04, 2012, 11:46:24 AM
This just in.

Harpist Peter Sterling's first great inspiration revealed in a recent crop circle podcast interview.

Also, there are rumors that John B. Wells believes he looks like this to the world, especially if he's recently traveled on the Great Green Express.

[attachimg=1]

We have the makings of a combo...


Morgus

Quote from: b_dubb on August 04, 2012, 03:25:07 PM
you ARE kidding ... right?
sadly no.
Noory has even played some of his Poe readings on the air at the end of some of the Friday night shows...



Harmness

Quote from: coaster on August 03, 2012, 09:32:48 PM
wow. For once Im fucking speechless....from c2c's fb-
Friday night guest, harpist Peter Sterling, shares a video of his wind harp producing music in a crop circle...

I dont even know what to say to this.

Eeww.

Quote from: DangerousBlossom on August 04, 2012, 03:31:32 AM
I kind of turned off my ears after hearing the phrase “quantum nutrition” from the guest.   ::)

Eeww.


Quote from: Morgus on August 04, 2012, 04:37:23 PM
Noory has even played some of his Poe readings on the air at the end of some of the Friday night shows...


Eeww.


analog kid

Did George say who requested this album of his?

Sleepwalker

Quote from: Morgus on August 04, 2012, 02:18:12 AM
How sickening: Noory just mentioned on the air in the final hour tonight that he has been asked to produce and record an audio CD of his own singing songs...

Actually, a CD of Noory singing could be a real life saver.  Imagine your kid accidentally swallows poison and you have no syrup of ipecac.  The drug store is closed.  What to do?  Get out the Noory CD, hit PLAY and, within seconds, the kid is VOMITING. 

FRANTIC PARENT:  My son just swallowed poison.

POISON CONTROL: Relax and do as I say.  Do you have a George Noory sings Elvis' Greatest Hits CD?

FRANTIC PARENT:  Yes.

POISON CONTROL:  Put it in your player and hit PLAY.  Do it now.

FRANTIC PARENT:  Okay.  Come here Billy.  Listen to this.  (Wretching sounds heard in the background).

POISON CONTROL:  Good. I can hear him vomiting.   

PARENT:  I'm vomiting too.

POISON CONTROL:  I know.  I heard Noory singing over the phone.  I'm vomiting  too.  But the important thing is that Billy vomited so he'll be fine.  Keep that Noory CD in your medicine cabinet.

PARENT:  Okay.  (still vomiting).  Thanks!





Sleepwalker

Quote from: analog kid on August 04, 2012, 05:11:21 PM
Did George say who requested this album of his?

Yep. The Poison Control Center.  As a substitute for syrup of Ipecac.

analog kid

By "request," here's the first track from his upcoming album.

McPhallus

Quote from: CoastCanuck on August 04, 2012, 02:03:22 PM
This could open up a new door for Noory, if successful.  Concert tours, backstage female fans, more money... he'd be so busy he would have to retire from C2C.

What would be the demographic of the typical Noory groupie?  It boggles the mind.

Quote from: McPhallus on August 04, 2012, 06:59:36 PM
What would be the demographic of the typical Noory groupie?  It boggles the mind.

This is just a guess, but I think the typical Noory groupie may represent the same demographic who wear adult incontinence aids and carry a drool cup. Of course, this is just an educated guess and not based on any scientific evaluation.

And I don't care what anyone says, I eagerly await the debut of George Noory's song cd because it will head directly to youtube where it will be hailed as the perfect storm answer to Shatner's "Mr Tambourine Man" , the Russian TROLOLOL guy and Bill Murray's SNL lounge lizard. Bring it on George, the world waits.

Quote from: analog kid on August 04, 2012, 05:11:21 PM
Did George say who requested this album of his?


His friend Pat Boone would very much like George to put out a CD



HAL 9000

Quote from: Paper*Boy on August 04, 2012, 07:34:46 PMHis friend Pat Boone would very much like George to put out a CD

Seems to me I posted that album here long ago but don't know where, so here is the link again for those souls brave enough to listen:

http://www.rapidshare.com/files/3448251789/Pat.Boone-In.A.Metal.Mood.No.More.Mr.Nice.Guy-1997.rar


indigoo

Quote from: MV on August 04, 2012, 10:45:46 AM
[attach=1]


what the fuck?

Reminds me of a video I saw from George Kings' "Aetherius Society" where a bunch of them go up to this mountain and "charge a prayer battery" with chants and stupid words. Equally ridiculous new-age nonsense like this Sterling fella.

C2C is really getting me down when I think about it, and listen to old shows at work/

Morgus

Quote from: HAL 9000 on August 04, 2012, 08:45:19 PM
for those souls brave enough to listen
no thanks, i preferred pat boone singing on The Beverly Hillbillies instead...  :P

michio

Quote from: Morgus on August 04, 2012, 02:42:30 PM
or more likely will just result in another freebie CD to pass out to new streamlink (coast insider) subscribers, like they did in the past with an audio cd of Noory reading short stories like Edgar Allan Poe...  :P

Between Simple George's barely average "singing" ability (Frank Sinatra would have cringed at the sound) and his completely talentless "story telling" (Roddy McDowall is turning in his grave), sNoory should stick to what he's able to do best. He's mediocre at asking questions from 3x5 cards, saying "truly" and "dramatic" one thousand times a night, and making frequent references to his celebrity acquaintances. I've said it before and I'll say it again, sNoory has no shame and no humility.

Morgus

Haha, John B. Wells' main guest on tonight just now complained about cranks and wackos that tell him about the ridiculous 'abiotic oil' theory.
Thats Noory's pet theory and belief.
No wonder this guest hasn't been on c2c at all with Noory, last time he was on with Art Bell 7 years ago.
Noory won't have guests on that disagree totally on his core beliefs like oil.

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