Jazmunda's Excellent Adventure in the USA

[FallenSeraph]

YAY! Welcome to the States! Y'all c'mon over to Memphis and visit Graceland and eat a fried peanut butter-and-banana sandwich with me if you get bored in NYC! 

[wr250]

jaz hit up a walmart so you can see "people of walmart " in their native habitat.

[eddie dean]

Don't forget to bring your large knife when you are walking around the streets of  NYC  jaz!

[attachimg=1]

Coaster beat me to the first Dundee joke!
I couldn't resist another one

[UnscreenedCaller]

There was a great vibe in the city today. Spent the morning shopping in SoHo. My wife is doing her best to keep your economy afloat. You're welcome.

Went for a stroll to Washington Square Park and found myself in the middle of a Hare Krishna festival. This also happened to me once in London in Hyde Park so they must be following me around.

I went for another stroll and then found myself amongst another local festival on 8th Ave which was really cool too.

The weather was superb. Tomorrow we will venture into midtown and Times Square as I've promised my daughters a haul from the Disney & M&M stores. We're also going to be taking in a Broadway show so we will be on our best tourist behaviour.

The city really put on the dog for you and the Mrs, Jaz. Gorgeous photos. The weather has been horrible this past week. You arrived for the best of it, plus the Hare Krishna festival, an extra bonus. Washington Square Park was one of my favorite hang outs way back when. It's a great place to people watch.

Please extend our thanks, on behalf of all NY taxpayers, to the Mrs. for helping lessen the load. Watch out for the Disney store- you'll want to buy two of everything for your princesses. I wish I still had a connection there to get you a discount, but maybe you both can charm them with your Australian accents. 

[b_dubb]

I wish I still had a connection there to get you a discount, but maybe you both can charm them with your Australian accents. 

Just tell them you're Jazmunda from the GabCast and then show them your black AmEx GabCast credit card

[Catsmile]

Yes Jaz, please eat a fried peanut butter-and-banana sandwich.

We can start a betting pool if you do.
We'll bet on how long it will make you blast a dookie through a screen door.
I'm sure we can conjure up many side bets on this as well...

[PB the Deplorable]

Anybody know where one can pick up a quick jar of Vegemite on the down-low?

[bateman]

Oh no...

[TheMan WhoFell ToEarth]

Oh no...

Pizza's on Bateman.  Literally. 

[jazmunda]

Oh no...

It rubs it's lotion on it's skin.

Jetlag is still a bitch. It's 2 am and I'm wide awake.

UC or Bateman, you ever been to Bed, Bath & Beyobd on 18th and 6th. I actually got lost in there. By the time I found my way out I passed the milk section and there were cartons with a picture of my face on them.

[paladin1991]

Don't forget to bring your large knife when you are walking around the streets of  NYC  jaz!

[attachimg=1]

Coaster beat me to the first Dundee joke!
I couldn't resist another one

Is that a poster with Jazz and his wife?  Shit.  I hope their swingers.

[UnscreenedCaller]

UC or Bateman, you ever been to Bed, Bath & Beyobd on 18th and 6th. I actually got lost in there. By the time I found my way out I passed the milk section and there were cartons with a picture of my face on them.

Yes, it's big. Very big. That's why it's '& Beyond'. Why didn't you just take the opportunity to crawl into one of the floor beds and sleep off the jet lag? No one would ever notice.

[paladin1991]

Jazz, if you're feelin' it. Rent a car and drive over here to Anaheim.  We'll go to Disneyland.  It'll only take you a couple of hours to drive over. 

4 hours, tops. 

[UnscreenedCaller]

Anybody know where one can pick up a quick jar of Vegemite on the down-low?

The Australian Consulate is in midtown. I'll bet they have a pyramid of Vegemite jars on every desk for the taking.

[George Drooly]

Yes, it's big. Very big. That's why it's '& Beyond'.

Bed, Bath & Portal

[UnscreenedCaller]

Bed, Bath & Portal

LOL

[jazmunda]

I found the source of George Noory's power and destroyed every last bottle of the stuff.

[albrecht]

I found the source of George Noory's power and destroyed every last bottle of the stuff.

Question. How was your experience with our customs and immigration when you arrived?

I've heard bad experiences from some European relatives and friends in recent years (complaining of almost harassment and giving fingerprints, photographs, etc. As if there is a big threat of Norwegians looking to come here illegally or commit terrorism.) Though last month a Dutch relative (not an uncle haha) said he got through in minutes and said it was "the best experience he ever had" going through customs in any country and he travels for business quite a bit. I almost missed him at the airport because he breezed through so quickly.

[Heather Wade]

I found the source of George Noory's power and destroyed every last bottle of the stuff.

Enjoy the Big Bad City, Jaz! 

[jazmunda]

Question. How was your experience with our customs and immigration when you arrived?

I've heard bad experiences from some European relatives and friends in recent years (complaining of almost harassment and giving fingerprints, photographs, etc. As if there is a big threat of Norwegians looking to come here illegally or commit terrorism.) Though last month a Dutch relative (not an uncle haha) said he got through in minutes and said it was "the best experience he ever had" going through customs in any country and he travels for business quite a bit. I almost missed him at the airport because he breezed through so quickly.

The guy at customs didn't have much of a personality but that is what you would expect. You want them to be on the lookout for terrorists and not being your best friend. Every foreigner entering is finger printed via a scanner and not the old fashioned ink ones and has their photo taken. I think this is also done to confirm you are the same person if you ever return and not someone using someone else's passport. It was pleasant enough experience. No anal probes is also appreciated.

[Heather Wade]

The guy at customs didn't have much of a personality but that is what you would expect. You want them to be on the lookout for terrorists and not being your best friend. Every foreigner entering is finger printed via a scanner and not the old fashioned ink ones and has their photo taken. I think this is also done to confirm you are the same person if you ever return and not someone using someone else's passport. It was pleasant enough experience. No anal probes is also appreciated.

You didn't see in the brochure that they do those on your way home?   

[jazmunda]

Day 2:

Started the morning with a stroll down to Ground Zero. The view walking south towards the site is dramatically different to what I saw when taking this journey my last time here in 1998. I still vividly remember that day (late at night for me). I was watching The West Wing when they cut transmission of the program to bring breaking news. Little did I expect that for the next few days I would be glued to the TV.

If you haven't been to Ground Zero and in particular the museum that they have there then you simply must. I think they have done tremendous job in respecting the site and also moving on. It was a very moving experience and my wife and I will never forget it.

[UnscreenedCaller]

I'm glad they left the footprint be, in the end. Everyone here has a story about that day, and I won't bore anyone with mine. But one reason why I love NYC so much is the defiance that made it possible for life to get back to normal as quickly as possible afterwards, a real drive to not let something like this bring the city to its knees. The show went on on Broadway after that first night, and people went back to work and school, a little shaky but alright. And where there once was a vista of skyscrapers that you could see from Brooklyn and Queens, there now was a gap and pillars of smoke. But life went on. It's good that the gap is being filled with human activity again.

[eddie dean]

The guy at customs didn't have much of a personality but that is what you would expect. You want them to be on the lookout for terrorists and not being your best friend. Every foreigner entering is finger printed via a scanner and not the old fashioned ink ones and has their photo taken. I think this is also done to confirm you are the same person if you ever return and not someone using someone else's passport. It was pleasant enough experience. No anal probes is also appreciated.

Your trip just started, so you never know.
What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas!

Seriously though, I hope you and the mrs. are having a good time!

[Evil Twin Of Zen]

i gots yer ticket home.... or maybe it will just tickle those other "gotta go now" fears of yers...


How does it feel to be flushed down the toilet,sparkcleanh20

[Raskolnikov]

Where is the closest Wal Mart located at if you stay in Manhattan? And how do you get there the easiest way?

Jazmunda; If it's shopping you want you should check out the Woodbury commons outlet.

[jazmunda]

Jet lag sure is crazy. I crashed just after writing the first part of my Day 2 post and was part way through the second part when I must have crashed. I awoke at nearly 5:00 am with my cell phone in the bed and my feet on the pillow and my head on the other end of the bed. There was turmeric everywhere.

Anyway to continue ....

We then took the subway to perhaps one of my favourite destinations in New York which is Central Park. What a beautiful piece of nature amongst the concrete jungle (which has it's own beauty). The day was just stunning and we walked around the park, sat on the grass and soaked in the fact that we didn't have a care in the world. Then we spotted a homeless guy pissing on a tree not three feet from where we were. God bless America.

We decided to grab a bite to eat and headed to the famous Carnegie Deli for a Pastrami on rye and a matzah ball chicken noodle soup. My god the portion sizes remind me why obesity runs rampant in this country. I could only eat half of my sandwich.

From there we headed to Broadway and took in a show. We saw Beautiful which was a fantastic. I never knew what a prolific song writer Carole King was. The next show we are seeing is The Book of Mormon. I can't wait.

We headed into Time Square which has certainly been cleaned up since the last time I was here. We did some shopping for the kids and thankfully I will never have to go back to that tourist trap. I can see why the locals won't step foot anywhere near there.

[area51drone]

This thread should be titled "Jazumunda sets his sights on bringing down NYC."   I'm really surprised that our NSA hasn't red flagged your ass and that they let you into our country based on your Bellgab posts, Jazmunda.   

[UnscreenedCaller]

Jaz, it's Monday in NYC. I hope you enjoyed the sights and sounds and smells of our majestic Department of Sanitation trucks as they make their way around the city picking up the festering weekend offerings. They're just one more sight  that makes NYC unforgettable. If you're lucky, you'll spot a driver or two wearing Crocodile Dundee hats.

[b_dubb]

jazmunda can you swing by Geneveve's in Queens and confirm the awesomeness of their za. That is your sworn duty as a member of the GabCast.