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Any Good Jokes?

Started by pyewacket, March 01, 2014, 07:34:47 PM

pyewacket

Quote from: maureen on April 29, 2014, 09:34:15 AM
careful with the legal codicil net!!

Is that what they use to catch Cod fish? We saw the old fishermen fixing those on our visit to Cape Cod.  ;D

zeebo

There's something fishy going on around here, and I think I fell for it hook, line, and sinker.

pyewacket

Quote from: zeebo on April 29, 2014, 02:03:06 PM
There's something fishy going on around here, and I think I fell for it hook, line, and sinker.

Yeah- we managed to lure you in on this one.  Glad you took the bait! ;)

paladin1991

You guys cut bait.  I'll fish....for Cod.

pyewacket

Quote from: paladin1991 on April 29, 2014, 03:44:42 PM
You guys cut bait.  I'll fish....for Cod.

Well- if you're angling for an invitation- we can all chum together!

zeebo

This thread is spawning a stream of good posts.

pyewacket

Quote from: zeebo on April 29, 2014, 09:20:30 PM
This thread is spawning a stream of good posts.

I agree- I haven't seen a crappie one yet! I hope more join in- don't be koi!

Check out "Wet Dream" by Kip Addotta on Youtube.  It is not porn, just a very funny, punny song on the subject of fish.  Dr. Demento sort of material....

pyewacket

Quote from: West of the Rockies on April 29, 2014, 10:21:45 PM
Check out "Wet Dream" by Kip Addotta on Youtube.  It is not porn, just a very funny, punny song on the subject of fish.  Dr. Demento sort of material....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6l1GvDWtccI

Thanks, West! He tackled the subject well!

Quote from: zeebo on April 29, 2014, 09:20:30 PM
This thread is spawning a stream of good posts.

I think we're gonna need a bigger boat, zeebo.

Hope your roe is easy to hoe, that you're happy as a clam at high tide, and everything is going swimmingly!  I'm a bit walleyed right now, but I'm not yet stewed to the gills, and I'm certainly no piker. I snagged this clip just for you, you magnificent basstard.  Enjoy!  I'm calling it a night so I don't overdo it and wake up tomorrow with a bad haddock.

http://youtu.be/http://youtu.be/PPa6WNj82Gs


maureen

All of you are brilliant!! ;D

a bit of Ogden Nash before bed:

         Whales have calves,
         Cats have kittens,
         Bears have cubs,
         Bats have bittens,
         Swans have cygnets,
         Seals have puppies,
         But guppies just have
         .... little guppies.
 

b_dubb

Wasn't sure where to put this.  This thread has to be more appropriate than one of the religious themed threads.

Quote from: Robert Ghostwolf's Ghost on April 29, 2014, 11:08:23 PM
I think we're gonna need a bigger boat, zeebo.


And a different link to the Fishin' Musician clip. Try this one.

SCTV John Candy & The Tubes

bigchucka

Quote from: West of the Rockies on April 29, 2014, 10:21:45 PM
Check out "Wet Dream" by Kip Addotta on Youtube.  It is not porn, just a very funny, punny song on the subject of fish.  Dr. Demento sort of material....

Never did care for that.  Just never found it that funny... used to catch Dr. Demento on my local radio station when they carried it.  Comedy can sometimes be hit or miss.



zeebo

I know you guys aren't fishing for compliments, but you're all so smart I feel like I'm back in school.

pyewacket

I'm having a whale of a time- I hope everyone doesn't clam up!  ;)

Quote from: pyewacket on May 01, 2014, 10:24:32 AM
I'm having a whale of a time- I hope everyone doesn't clam up!  ;)

I'm going to get up off my perch to say that anyone who bails now is either bullheaded or ef-fin inseine.

One of my favorite songs is "Sole Man" by Salmon Dave.

paladin1991

Quote from: West of the Rockies on April 29, 2014, 10:21:45 PM
Check out "Wet Dream" by Kip Addotta on Youtube.  It is not porn, just a very funny, punny song on the subject of fish.  Dr. Demento sort of material....
Kip Adotta?  He still alive?  Maybe Jorch could do a show on 70's comedians who are not dead...but should be.

paladin1991

Quote from: zeebo on April 30, 2014, 11:46:33 PM
I know you guys aren't fishing for compliments, but you're all so smart I feel like I'm back in school.
Back in school, eh?  Remember this oldie but goodie? "First one smelt it dealt it!"

maureen

... and Molly Malone's "cockles and mussels" body-building shop!!


zeebo

Quote from: paladin1991 on May 01, 2014, 06:21:12 PM
Back in school, eh?  Remember this oldie but goodie? "First one smelt it dealt it!"

I used to play poker with a guy who would say that - he was a real card shark.  So sometimes we just played Go Fish.


pyewacket

Quote from: zeebo on May 01, 2014, 07:38:09 PM
I used to play poker with a guy who would say that - he was a real card shark.  So sometimes we just played Go Fish.

Nice one! You little scampi!  :)

Quote from: maureen on April 29, 2014, 11:24:47 PM
All of you are brilliant!! ;D

a bit of Ogden Nash before bed:

         Whales have calves,
         Cats have kittens,
         Bears have cubs,
         Bats have bittens,
         Swans have cygnets,
         Seals have puppies,
         But guppies just have
         .... little guppies.


O is for Ogden,
The incomparable Nash
Rare among poets,
He's one none will bash.

And since you mentioned viviparous fish, you might like the chapter about the blenny, as well as as the rest of Will Cuppy's uniquely twisted academic essays on natural history in his almost forgotten classic, How to Become Extinct.  If you like snide, snarky humor,  he was one of the originators.



pyewacket

I think the fish thread has reached it's lowest ebb- maybe it's time to gut it and put it on ice. LOL Thanks for all the funny posts.

here's a quick one for the ladies:

Statistics and latest research shows that women who carry a little bit of excess midriff or pelvic fat actually live a lot longer than the men who point it out to them.

zeebo

Quote from: pyewacket on May 03, 2014, 12:52:00 PM
I think the fish thread has reached it's lowest ebb- maybe it's time to gut it and put it on ice. LOL Thanks for all the funny posts....

Yes it was swell, but I'll wave goodbye to the previous eddies and currents of the thread, and swim march on.  Here's one:

Q. How many paranoids does it take to change a lightbulb?

A. Why do you want to know?

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