The GabCast (A podcast about BellGab)

[Jackstar]

HOTFIX: Cunts are now literate. Cheers!

Sorry, Gang. This one's got to be set to rollback. We tried it out, and here is what I can tell you: it did not work out. A case could be made for this particular HOTFIX (it does seem like a winner on first read, and it certainly tested quite highly in Our focus groups, so, it is quite likely to come back in some form) to be set to rollover--but those kind of requests have to be passed through Management, and this is not the time for those f****** suits to come down from their ebony + ivory tower and start f****** with s***. They have got plenty of their own s*** to f*** with. You do not need to be having Them f*** with yours.

Though They would love to, I am sure. You know how Management is: a bunch of b***** little girls. Ugh. The worst. I would take some cat ladies, most days of the week over any b***** little girl. How do those b***** little girls eat anyway? I can't imagine cooking anything with all that b***** going on. (I wish I could say, with all due requisite honesty, that I cannot imagine all the b***** that a cooking b***** little girl could produce, but I'm not going to lie: I have seen things, + heard cooking + b**** little girls, b******* the likes of which, you people would not believe.)

How am I doing, Robert? I think I am fine: therefore, thanks for not asking.

[Jackstar]

No more code Jackstar.

Dude! That's like half my brand (see above, re: "mathematics")! NO SALE DEALS.

[Innerreach]

Sorry, Gang. This one's got to be set to rollback. We tried it out, and here is what I can tell you: it did not work out. A case could be made for this particular HOTFIX (it does seem like a winner on first read, and it certainly tested quite highly in Our focus groups, so, it is quite likely to come back in some form) to be set to rollover--but those kind of requests have to be passed through Management, and this is not the time for those f****** suits to come down from their ebony + ivory tower and start f****** with s***. They have got plenty of their own s*** to f*** with. You do not need to be having Them f*** with yours.

Though They would love to, I am sure. You know how Management is: a bunch of b***** little girls. Ugh. The worst. I would take some cat ladies, most days of the week over any b***** little girl. How do those b***** little girls eat anyway? I can't imagine cooking anything with all that b***** going on. (I wish I could say, with all due requisite honesty, that I cannot imagine all the b***** that a cooking b***** little girl could produce, but I'm not going to lie: I have seen things, + heard cooking + b**** little girls, b******* the likes of which, you people would not believe.)

How am I doing, Robert? I think I am fine: therefore, thanks for not asking.

Let's be honest HAHAHAHAH.... Okay, Bro..

[Innerreach]

Dude! That's like half my brand (see above, re: "mathematics")! NO SALE DEALS.

If you're flexing... You're losing. Don't be a dick...

[Jackstar]

If you're flexing... You're losing.

Prove it. /plox

Don't be a dick...

I'm not sure, it might be too early to say, or even to be speculating... but, that might constitute the entirety of the, like, other half of my brand. Stay tuned More to come. (Oh, and, by the way... is it perhaps not, a little early in this grandly inspiring period of our Hot'N'Fresh journey of reconciliation, to be giving out... orders? You seem, a little b*****... you seem a little bossy, I'm not going to lie.


p.s.: oops, my O.D.D. kicked in again.

p.p.s.: FU FU FU I hope you ROT!

[Innerreach]

Prove it. /plox

I'm not sure, it might be too early to say, or even to be speculating... but, that might constitute the entirety of the, like, other half of my brand. Stay tuned More to come. (Oh, and, by the way... is it perhaps not, a little early in this grandly inspiring period of our Hot'N'Fresh journey of reconciliation, to be giving out... orders? You seem, a little b*****... you seem a little bossy, I'm not going to lie.


p.s.: oops, my O.D.D. kicked in again.

p.p.s.: FU FU FU I hope you ROT!

I could easily destroy you in a simple sentence, but I won't... I will say this, in the face of your silly accusations that mean little to nothing! #WELCOME HUMAN #SHUT THE FUCK UP & You're not special and either am I so, Fuck off! Yawn... I'm tired again... When did obscure code become so invaluable? Fuck ME!..... :

[Jackstar]

I could easily destroy you in a simple sentence

Dracarys.

[Innerreach]

Shall we play a game? Another game. No, not that Game. (You just lost The Game.) I just made it up. It's hot. This is hot. I am not kidding. Would I lie to you?

Never on purpose, Kids. Cross my heart and chop a cherry tree down. More on that later. So here's what's up: new Jackstar. Not an all-new Jackstar... I'm not gonna lie, same old penis, tho.

Brand new, tho. So I got a new... "Podcast?" Oh no. Where We're going from here, We don't need Pods. (Note to Self: call down to the toolshop, find out if the vapers can be retooled in any practical way.) So not "my Podcast"... but, my... 'Cast.

I have a this habit of not reading your long form, Jackstar... However, if you'd like to talk I'm sure we could arrange a time.

MY CASTING. /FLEX. (The lease on the bottle changes every other year, but--you don't need to know that.) I'm not going to call it a Podcast anymore. Too Apple. Too fruity. Too fucking ghey.

So on the 'cast, on my 'cast, on my casting--I'm not going to lie, this is not bad times, no no, no no no, not at all--I play a video on my audio, and I do this... by simply holding the phone next to the mic. Are you getting me here? I put my phone on the mic. This is exciting, isn't it? O BOY. If you only knew it all. My visible grandiosity would seem positively tamed to any passers by who also happened to be ignorant observers.

I get the audio this way, because the video imagery itself... the I, Magery, if one Wills... Bruce Wills... Oops, missed it by that much. Anyway, long story short--poof--I don't wanna bother blurring out Wonder Boy's face. Unless, it's with a mallet shaped like a cunt--and I don't have one of those lying around anyway, I left my last one in my other dimension's pants. And even though they love me in that dimension, I ain't going back. (I guess to them, it's "I ain't coming back" but let's focus on why we're here. That dimension stocks cunt-shaped mallets, anyway, so... bye) And I am, as we all have been informed, committed to my discipline of pacifism. That's right! Still. THE FLOWERS ARE STILL STANDING. At least I think they are. I'm hallucinating pretty wicked right now, I upgraded my cough syrup to explosive diarrhea syrup. Worth it. A little bland, surprisingly. Still, worth it. Okay, moving on. Video Editing. Do we have any experts on Video Editing in the da hizzouse, Ms. Mouse? Yeah, no, probably not, huh? Well, that's too bad.

Because I would like to get those little blurry ovals, you dig? Fuckin' eleven-year-olds on fuckin' Twitch (The MIB CDEN hereby disavows any and all knowledge of any activities on Twitch.) can fuckin' do that. Or their parents, I guess. I wouldn't know. I don't know anything about who teaches eleven-year-olds, don't ask me. But if you did? The answer, as always, is Drill Sergeant. Sir, Yessir.

So on this drop, I'm not worried about it. Turns out I was worried, briefly--OH MY GOD, WHAT IF I ACCIDENTALLY DOXX SOMEONE, OMG, WILL I BE RUINED FOR LIFE? OMG OMG. I THINK I JUST DOXXED SOMEONE. SHHH. DO YOU HEAR THAT? I THINK I HEAR A DOXX. NO, NO--THAT'S A DOG. WHEW. CLOSE ONE. WHEW. Let's dial it down. Let's all... relax.

Except for you, Tiler. I'm pretty sure we gotta have you on duty. Semper fi. Hey, you got any shawarma on you? Cool. Hey, by the way, do you know anything about... video editing? The password is: THERE ARE NO QUESTIONS, ONLY ANSWERS. Acknoweldged, than-k you for your service. So what it is, Br0uh? Do you know an app that can make faces blurry? Yeah, hehe, I thought of that one instantly, but, I left it in my pants. No, not my other pants... MY PANTS. Yeah, that's right. I know, weird, isn't it? Trust Me, believe Me, know Me: long story. I'm in the middle of a question, though--we don't have time for that kind of thing, Tiley. What's that you say? "Why don't you just Google for an app?" Ha. Hah. HAH! HAHAHAHAHAHAH! Why don't I? Why don't YOU, FUCKER?

GAROTTE. Okay, moving on, fuck the app, I decided--I'll do it live. And it worked fine! Thanks for asking! Turns out... yeah, a person can simply hold the phone speaker next to the mic, and, Lo! It works.

Are you with me here? IT WORKS. It does! And, well... that makes one of us around here. Que celebratory music. PAUSE. There's a problem. HAMMERTIME? No no. No no NO. HAMMERTIME is not a problem... HAMMERTIME is a solution--and a decisive one, at that. Put down your pepperbox and step away from the saltines, Tex. Mmmmm. Let's take a moment, Gablings--we're already on PAUSE, so let's take a moment to thank Ourselves for taking us so far, so good, and so what if there's a problem? Check out the mix, while the mathematician resolves it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah: I know what you're thinking. You're thinking I'm pretty fucked, right? Look, ook, read, read: stop giving me your shit, people. Your problems are YOUR problems. My problems are the seeds of the fruit of my growth. And, honestly... all of all y'all, from now on, if you would, pretty please, with sugar on top--get your filthy paws off of my problems, you numbskull nincomms.

[Innerreach]

Dracarys.

Do you fight all your battles without talking? Hey, you talk a lot!

[Innerreach]

Dracarys.

With all due respect.. I love you. However, take some time to love me back!

[Jackstar]

Shall we play a game? Another game. No, not that Game. (You just lost The Game.) I just made it up. It's hot. This is hot. I am not kidding. Would I lie to you? Well, I would tell a lie, for example... to save Grapefruit's life. (Hi Princesses!) I don't know how that kind of a choice might play out, but given a choice between telling her that she doesn't look fat in those pants, or watching her taken out by an elephant gun, I'm going to go with the big, bold & bald-faced lie, every. damn. time. (Not for her kids, though. Fuck them. With them, it's 100% truth, all the way down the line for those lil' scamps rascals. What? I've got my standards, yo. Besides, they're Native (NA)--they'll be back in less than ten minutes as Hot'N'Freshborne lil' baby crows--likely twice as cute and surely half as messy. Look, don't worry about it... these are just examples. Yeesh, tough crowd, I can pre-cognitively listen to the groans of dismay from most all of the parents in this post's Audience Of The Future. /flex)

Never on purpose, Kids. Cross my heart and chop a cherry tree down. More on that later. So here's what's up: new Jackstar. Not an all-new Jackstar... I'm not gonna lie, same old penis. Word.

Brand new, tho. So, I got a new... "Podcast?" Oh no. Where We're going from here, We don't need Pods. (Note to Self: call down to the toolshop, find out if the vapers can be retooled in any practical way. Maybe we can call them... Peds? Check with Legal and Footwear.) So not "my Podcast"... but, my... 'Cast.

MY CASTING. /FLEX. (The lease on the bottle changes every other year, but--you don't need to know that.) I'm not going to call it "a Podcast" anymore. Too Apple. Too fruity. Too fucking ghey.

So on the 'cast, on my 'cast, on my casting--I'm not going to lie, this is not bad times, no no, no no no, not at all--I play a video on my audio, and I do this... by simply holding the phone next to the mic. Are you getting me here? I put my phone on the mic. This is exciting, isn't it? O BOY. If you only knew it all. My visible grandiosity would seem positively tamed to any passers by who also happened to be ignorant observers. (Here on Bellgab, that's less likely than one might think.)

I get the audio this way, because the video imagery itself... the I, Magery, if one Wills... Bruce Wills... Oops, missed it by that much. Anyway, long story short--poof--I don't wanna bother blurring out WonderBoy's face. Unless, it's with a mallet shaped like a cunt--and I don't have one of those lying around anyway, I left my last one in my other dimension's pants. And even though they love me in that dimension, I ain't going back. (I guess to them, it's "I ain't coming back" but let's focus on why we're here. That dimension stocks cunt-shaped mallets, anyway, so... bye) And I am, as we all have been informed, committed to my discipline of pacifism. That's right! Still. THE FLOWERS ARE STILL STANDING. At least I think they are. I'm hallucinating pretty wicked right now, I upgraded my cough syrup to explosive diarrhea syrup. Worth it. A little bland, surprisingly. Still, worth it. Okay, moving on. Video Editing. Do we have any experts on Video Editing in the da hizzouse, Ms. Mouse? Yeah, no, probably not, huh? Well, that's too bad.

Because I would like to get those little blurry ovals, you dig? Fuckin' eleven-year-olds on fuckin' Twitch (The MIB CDEN hereby disavows any and all knowledge of any activities on Twitch.) can fuckin' do that. Or their parents, I guess. I wouldn't know. I don't know anything about who teaches eleven-year-olds, don't ask me. But if you did? The answer, as always, is Drill Sergeant. Sir, Yessir.

So on this drop, I'm not worried about it. Turns out I was worried, briefly--OH MY GOD, WHAT IF I ACCIDENTALLY DOXX SOMEONE, OMG, WILL I BE RUINED FOR LIFE? OMG OMG. I THINK I JUST DOXXED SOMEONE. SHHH. DO YOU HEAR THAT? I THINK I HEAR A DOXX. NO, NO--THAT'S A DOG. WHEW. CLOSE ONE. WHEW. Let's dial it down. Let's all... relax.

Except for you, Tiler. I'm pretty sure we gotta have you on duty. Semper fi. Hey, you got any shawarma on you? Cool. Hey, by the way, do you know anything about... video editing? The password is: THERE ARE NO QUESTIONS, ONLY ANSWERS. Acknowledged, than-k you for your service. So what it is, Br0uh? Do you know an app that can make faces blurry? Yeah, hehe, I thought of that one instantly, but, I left it in my pants. No, not my other pants... MY PANTS. Yeah, that's right. I know, weird, isn't it? Trust Me, believe Me, know Me: long story. I'm in the middle of a question, though--we don't have time for that kind of thing, Tiley. What's that you say? "Why don't you just Google for an app?" Ha. Hah. HAH! HAHAHAHAHAHAH! Why don't I? Why don't YOU, FUCKER?

GAROTTE. Okay, moving on, fuck the app, I decided--I'll do it live. And it worked fine! Thanks for asking! Turns out... yeah, a person can simply hold the phone speaker next to the mic, and, Lo! It works.

Are you with me here? IT WORKS. It does! And, well... that makes one of us around here. Que celebratory music. PAUSE. There's a problem. HAMMERTIME? No no. No no NO. HAMMERTIME is not a problem... HAMMERTIME is a solution--and a decisive one, at that. Put down your pepperbox and step away from the saltines, TRex. Mmmmm. Let's take a moment, Gablings--we're already on PAUSE, so let's take a moment to thank Ourselves for taking us so far, so good, and so what if there's a problem? Check out the mix, while the mathematician resolves it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah: I know what you're thinking. You're thinking I'm pretty fucked, right? Look, look, read, read: stop giving me your shit, people. Your problems are YOUR problems. My problems are the seeds of the fruit of my growth. And, honestly... all of all y'all, from now on, if you would, pretty please, with sugar on top--get your filthy paws off of my problems, you numbskull nincomms nitwits.


And now, it's time to play... DOXX... OR... NO DOXX! The greatest game ever played... EVER! For you. Now as we can see, the name of this game, is doxxing. Doxxing here, doxxing there. Doxxing everywhere!

As all of you reading this may well imagine--indeed, you may very well imagine indeed--there will not be any doxxing going on here, coming from me. No, no no, no no no: Jackstar does not doxx. Jackstar has been doxxed. Doxxing is, in quite serious point of fact... srs bzns. However, it's not for those reasons that I can guarantee--I am using the word "guarantee" here--that I will be absolutely positively OMEGA--07ly superlatively... not only not planning to doxx anyone on this site, anywhere on this site at all, ever, but neither am I intending to incite any doxxing. Anywhere. Anytime. Behind any car. Nada. This is just for fun. This is just for the fans.

This is just for us. So help me God. Okay, now that's over with. Lose the gospel music.

And so! Lo!! The question at hand: imagine if you will... an audio recording. And on this audio recording, a listener can hear several voices. One of them, naturally, is that of yours truly... Jackstar.

(Please clap.)

There are other voices present in the clip--ignore their identities. They are NOT peasants--these are some high-0-level VIPs, I assure you. Movers; shakers; candlestick makers; a raccoon wearing a wig; Billy Bush--you get the idea. But the identities of the speakers, are NOT part of The Game. (You just lost The Game.) What IS the game, this time around, in the Premier--I have used the word "Premiere" before, but usually, I then spit on the ground... NOT THIS TIME (a frenetic, sporadic, jagged burst applause emerges in the background--a single shot rings out; applause swiftly ends. As if by Lightning Bolt(5).).

... Right. Okay then. In this "Debut" proffering of... DOXX... OR... NO DOXX!!! any willing participants are presented with the following crown of thorny problem--in the audio recording, which will be presented shortly on an a mostly-all-new-and-TOTALLY-NEW-2U Five Minutes With Jackstar--"You Talking To Me? BEAST MODE" during the... convers- well, the speech of the participants, we are able to clearly hear someone say, quite loudly enough to be quite unmistakable... the name of a particular person is stated out loud. Twice. (Que sad trombone.wav) Now, this is no problem at all, I can just (bleep) it out. It's easy. I can even (fuck) it out. Not that I want to... that's just an example. (However, that is a cool thing for a person to be able to do. I think I'll pass for now.)

And, as I have guaranteed... I will not publish the clip with the audio unredacted. Remember, Jackstar does not channel, Jackstar does not doxx, and Jackstar does not give a single ripe wet fuck what you might think about any Chalice Holder's personal integrity... I may not give a fuck, but I am not a fan of either deliberate -or- accidental doxxing, especially if malicious intent is involved. (There are those who may claim--and have--that I have engaged in doxxing, however: Nope, not me. Not my style. Trust Me, know Me, believe Me: I'm just a patsy.)

The casting, my casting, will be published SOON on the MIB CDEN, and I look forward to the day, when I will never again have to type those words, anywhere, anywhen, anytime, ever again. All them hashtags and shit--I'm here to tell you, that's actually a lot of work. I had no idea. Just thinking about having to do it, I'm wiped out already. I would prefer to live in a world where I do not have to do any work... all of you would simply just know that I had done and released work. As if by Magic.

Although I am very willing--and likely, always will be, colour depending--to spray paint it on the hood of a car. "MIB CDEN 4LYF." I simply like the simple, clean look of it. Classic. Now, when you listen to my latest episode of this years' winner of Most Promising Emergent Performance Artist for the second year in a row--(Crickets.)--those who will choose to particpate, may come here to post their guesses, as to either, or both, the name of or the relationship to any prominent person of public figure, of well-known repute. (Or really, any old ratbastard Peckerwood will do. This Game isn't serious, Chums. Doxxing is.) GOOD LUCK. bbiab, ilu

Dracarys.

Hey, uh... by the way, uh... Reachie, just how gay are you? Because you seem pretty gay. Why you gotta archive my Fresh'N'Hot postings like that? Now that's just gonna sit there forever, like luggage contaminated with Texan Herpes. Ain't no one is ever gonna pick something like that up. It's been there way too long, and now cannot be deleted. What is the meaning of this? Heads can--and will--roll over this. Don't think I won't burn all this street cred down in an instant... all stars just wanna cleanse the world with fire, and it's a favorite thing to do... EVERY DAY. But, that won't remove that unauthorized infringing copy of my work-in-progress--that contains proprietary information. I'm gonna let it slide, this time--was it... was it... was it was an accident? Sure, could have been. I'm watching you. dRawr-car-is.

[Jackstar]

Do you fight all your battles without talking? Hey, you talk a lot!

With all due respect.. I love you. However, take some time to love me back!

Well... Hi. I guess... yeah, I guess this is my life now then. Cool. Head on down to the armory, get Duke to check you out a combo mop-fop-top hat-shotgun-bong and a Swabby's Hoody, and welcome to a board. And if you see anyone saying that "Jackstar has the worst groupies," anywhere, anytime, anyplace, ever again, I hereby authorize you to beat the whole holy ever loving crap out of them and make that body hit the floor. Boom Ka-boom.

[ItsOver]

With all due respect.. I love you. However, take some time to love me back!

Pics coming soon!  Kilts optional.

[Ciardelo]

ou know how Management is: a bunch of b***** little girls.

Preach

[Ciardelo]

racedreaming

Speedy McSpeederson

[Jackstar]

Pics coming soon! 

[attachment=1]

Kilts optional.

Not for long.

Speedy McSpeederson

Dave's not here.

Preach

Contract.

(Actually, this has been brought up and I frankly horrified and/or terrified that at least a minor number of the times the idea came up it was in at least something of a serious context. Praise MV5!

[Jackstar]

Pics coming soon!  Kilts optional.

[attachment=1,msg1454248]


In this photo, we see examples of the vintage posterage that led a crack team of digital forensic investigators on to the trail of evidence that finally led to the arrest, charging, prosecution, conviction, death row imprisonment, and execution of HILLARY RODHAM CLINTON... and then, Jackstar raised her from the dead (praise Jesus), rewound himself back through time (his old job), and dropped that Hot'N'Fresh Bitch off into a deep puddle of raw sewage at the Sicilian port of Messina found near the end of a filthy ghetto alleyway, strewn with the fly-encrusted remnants of various vile scraps of discarded grocery produce. Boxcrates of fishery waste products, left stacked in the open air for nearly four years, filled the air with a miasma of seafood and over-fermented fishwife jelly. Having landed in the sewage puddle face first, Ms. Clinton's first words after emerging, coughing & sputtering, from the revolting urban stew that had thoroughly and heavily soaked into her hair, run down her eyes and nose and into her mouth, were said to have been, "I smell... disease. Is this Heaven? It must be, I can smell the rancid and fetid odor of gangrenous flesh, and, though presenting better to the nose than it had been doing so in 2020, the unmistakable signature body odor of my close personal friend (and also personal cellular phone technical support expert IN ANOTHER LIFE) M*** is so close in the air, that I can easily determine, with unquestionable 100% accuracy, that she is right around the corner, and I can also smell a severe case of explosive diarrhea coming on. O, boy, is this great! But why is my neck so tired? Usually it's my arms." FU FU FU I hope you ROT! До свидания!

[Jackstar]

Pics coming soon!

I'm right here on the starting line; waiting for the starting pistol, waiting for an angel to come down from Heaven and buy me a starter house.

Looks like it's a dead heat to see if you can post a picture first.

[Jackstar]

Shall we play a game? Another game. No, not that Game. (You just lost The Game.) I just made it up. It's hot. This is hot. I am not kidding. Would I lie to you? Well, I would tell a lie, for example... to save Grapefruit's life. (Hi Princesses!) I don't know how that kind of a choice might play out, but given a choice between telling her that she doesn't look fat in those pants, or watching her taken out by an elephant gun, I'm going to go with the big, bold & bald-faced lie, every. damn. time. (Not for her kids, though. Fuck them. With them, it's 100% truth, all the way down the line for those lil' scamps rascals. What? I've got my standards, yo. Besides, they're Native (NA)--they'll be back in less than ten minutes as Hot'N'Freshborne lil' baby crows--likely twice as cute and surely half as messy. Look, don't worry about it... these are just examples. Yeesh, tough crowd, I can pre-cognitively listen to the groans of dismay from most all of the parents in this post's Audience Of The Future. /flex)

Never on purpose, Kids. Cross my heart and chop a cherry tree down. More on that later. So here's what's up: new Jackstar. Not an all-new Jackstar... I'm not gonna lie, same old penis. Word.

Brand new, tho. So, I got a new... "Podcast?" Oh no. Where We're going from here, We don't need Pods. (Note to Self: call down to the toolshop, find out if the vapers can be retooled in any practical way. Maybe we can call them... Peds? Check with Legal and Footwear.) So not "my Podcast"... but, my... 'Cast.

MY CASTING. /FLEX. (The lease on the bottle changes every other year, but--you don't need to know that.) I'm not going to call it "a Podcast" anymore. Too Apple. Too fruity. Too fucking ghey.

So on the 'cast, on my 'cast, on my casting--I'm not going to lie, this is not bad times, no no, no no no, not at all--I play a video on my audio, and I do this... by simply holding the phone next to the mic. Are you getting me here? I put my phone on the mic. This is exciting, isn't it? O BOY. If you only knew it all. My visible grandiosity would seem positively tamed to any passers by who also happened to be ignorant observers. (Here on Bellgab, that's less likely than one might think.)

I get the audio this way, because the video imagery itself... the I, Magery, if one Wills... Bruce Wills... Oops, missed it by that much. Anyway, long story short--poof--I don't wanna bother blurring out WonderBoy's face. Unless, it's with a mallet shaped like a cunt--and I don't have one of those lying around anyway, I left my last one in my other dimension's pants. And even though they love me in that dimension, I ain't going back. (I guess to them, it's "I ain't coming back" but let's focus on why we're here. That dimension stocks cunt-shaped mallets, anyway, so... bye) And I am, as we all have been informed, committed to my discipline of pacifism. That's right! Still. THE FLOWERS ARE STILL STANDING. At least I think they are. I'm hallucinating pretty wicked right now, I upgraded my cough syrup to explosive diarrhea syrup. Worth it. A little bland, surprisingly. Still, worth it. Okay, moving on. Video Editing. Do we have any experts on Video Editing in the da hizzouse, Ms. Mouse? Yeah, no, probably not, huh? Well, that's too bad.

Because I would like to get those little blurry ovals, you dig? Fuckin' eleven-year-olds on fuckin' Twitch (The MIB CDEN hereby disavows any and all knowledge of any activities on Twitch.) can fuckin' do that. Or their parents, I guess. I wouldn't know. I don't know anything about who teaches eleven-year-olds, don't ask me. But if you did? The answer, as always, is Drill Sergeant. Sir, Yessir.

So on this drop, I'm not worried about it. Turns out I was worried, briefly--OH MY GOD, WHAT IF I ACCIDENTALLY DOXX SOMEONE, OMG, WILL I BE RUINED FOR LIFE? OMG OMG. I THINK I JUST DOXXED SOMEONE. SHHH. DO YOU HEAR THAT? I THINK I HEAR A DOXX. NO, NO--THAT'S A DOG. WHEW. CLOSE ONE. WHEW. Let's dial it down. Let's all... relax.

Except for you, Tiler. I'm pretty sure we gotta have you on duty. Semper fi. Hey, you got any shawarma on you? Cool. Hey, by the way, do you know anything about... video editing? The password is: THERE ARE NO QUESTIONS, ONLY ANSWERS. Acknowledged, than-k you for your service. So what it is, Br0uh? Do you know an app that can make faces blurry? Yeah, hehe, I thought of that one instantly, but, I left it in my pants. No, not my other pants... MY PANTS. Yeah, that's right. I know, weird, isn't it? Trust Me, believe Me, know Me: long story. I'm in the middle of a question, though--we don't have time for that kind of thing, Tiley. What's that you say? "Why don't you just Google for an app?" Ha. Hah. HAH! HAHAHAHAHAHAH! Why don't I? Why don't YOU, FUCKER?

GAROTTE. Okay, moving on, fuck the app, I decided--I'll do it live. And it worked fine! Thanks for asking! Turns out... yeah, a person can simply hold the phone speaker next to the mic, and, Lo! It works.

Are you with me here? IT WORKS. It does! And, well... that makes one of us around here. Que celebratory music. PAUSE. There's a problem. HAMMERTIME? No no. No no NO. HAMMERTIME is not a problem... HAMMERTIME is a solution--and a decisive one, at that. Put down your pepperbox and step away from the saltines, TRex. Mmmmm. Let's take a moment, Gablings--we're already on PAUSE, so let's take a moment to thank Ourselves for taking us so far, so good, and so what if there's a problem? Check out the mix, while the mathematician resolves it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah: I know what you're thinking. You're thinking I'm pretty fucked, right? Look, look, read, read: stop giving me your shit, people. Your problems are YOUR problems. My problems are the seeds of the fruit of my growth. And, honestly... all of all y'all, from now on, if you would, pretty please, with sugar on top--get your filthy paws off of my problems, you numbskull nincomms nitwits.


And now, it's time to play... DOXX... OR... NO DOXX! The greatest game ever played... EVER! For you. Now as we can see, the name of this game, is doxxing. Doxxing here, doxxing there. Doxxing everywhere!

As all of you reading this may well imagine--indeed, you may very well imagine indeed--there will not be any doxxing going on here, coming from me. No, no no, no no no: Jackstar does not doxx. Jackstar has been doxxed. Doxxing is, in quite serious point of fact... srs bzns. However, it's not for those reasons that I can guarantee--I am using the word "guarantee" here--that I will be absolutely positively OMEGA--07ly superlatively... not only not planning to doxx anyone on this site, anywhere on this site at all, ever, but neither am I intending to incite any doxxing. Anywhere. Anytime. Behind any car. Nada. This is just for fun. This is just for the fans.

This is just for us. So help me God. Okay, now that's over with. Lose the gospel music.

And so! Lo!! The question at hand: imagine if you will... an audio recording. And on this audio recording, a listener can hear several voices. One of them, naturally, is that of yours truly... Jackstar.

(Please clap.)

There are other voices present in the clip--ignore their identities. They are NOT peasants--these are some high-0-level VIPs, I assure you. Movers; shakers; candlestick makers; a raccoon wearing a wig; Billy Bush--you get the idea. But the identities of the speakers, are NOT part of The Game. (You just lost The Game.) What IS the game, this time around, in the Premier--I have used the word "Premiere" before, but usually, I then spit on the ground... NOT THIS TIME (a frenetic, sporadic, jagged burst applause emerges in the background--a single shot rings out; applause swiftly ends. As if by Lightning Bolt(5).).

... Right. Okay then. In this "Debut" proffering of... DOXX... OR... NO DOXX!!! any willing participants are presented with the following crown of thorny problem--in the audio recording, which will be presented shortly on an a mostly-all-new-and-TOTALLY-NEW-2U Five Minutes With Jackstar--"You Talking To Me? BEAST MODE" during the... convers- well, the speech of the participants, we are able to clearly hear someone say, quite loudly enough to be quite unmistakable... the name of a particular person is stated out loud. Twice. (Que sad trombone.wav) Now, this is no problem at all, I can just (bleep) it out. It's easy. I can even (fuck) it out. Not that I want to... that's just an example. (However, that is a cool thing for a person to be able to do. I think I'll pass for now.)

And, as I have guaranteed... I will not publish the clip with the audio unredacted. Remember, Jackstar does not channel, Jackstar does not doxx, and Jackstar does not give a single ripe wet fuck what you might think about any Chalice Holder's personal integrity... I may not give a fuck, but I am not a fan of either deliberate -or- accidental doxxing, especially if malicious intent is involved. (There are those who may claim--and have--that I have engaged in doxxing, however: Nope, not me. Not my style. Trust Me, know Me, believe Me: I'm just a patsy.)

The casting, my casting, will be published SOON on the MIB CDEN, and I look forward to the day, when I will never again have to type those words, anywhere, anywhen, anytime, ever again. All them hashtags and shit--I'm here to tell you, that's actually a lot of work. I had no idea. Just thinking about having to do it, I'm wiped out already. I would prefer to live in a world where I do not have to do any work... all of you would simply just know that I had done and released work. As if by Magic.

Although I am very willing--and likely, always will be, colour depending--to spray paint it on the hood of a car. "MIB CDEN 4LYF." I simply like the simple, clean look of it. Classic. Now, when you listen to my latest episode of this years' winner of Most Promising Emergent Performance Artist for the second year in a row--(Crickets.)--those who will choose to particpate, may come here to post their guesses, as to either, or both, the name of or the relationship to any prominent person of public figure, of well-known repute. (Or really, any old ratbastard Peckerwood will do. This Game isn't serious, Chums. Doxxing is.) GOOD LUCK. bbiab, ilu



Hey, uh... by the way, uh... Reachie, just how gay are you? Because you seem pretty gay. Why you gotta archive my Fresh'N'Hot postings like that? Now that's just gonna sit there forever, like luggage contaminated with Texan Herpes. Ain't no one is ever gonna pick something like that up. It's been there way too long, and now cannot be deleted. What is the meaning of this? Heads can--and will--roll over this. Don't think I won't burn all this street cred down in an instant... all stars just wanna cleanse the world with fire, and it's a favorite thing to do... EVERY DAY. But, that won't remove that unauthorized infringing copy of my work-in-progress--that contains proprietary information. I'm gonna let it slide, this time--was it... was it... was it was an accident? Sure, could have been. I'm watching you. dRawr-car-is.

https://twitter.com/_n_Jack/status/1349001188138647553

Code Select Expand

#TheEdgeOfSeventeen #FAITH  #VOTE #LEGACY #TRUTH #AlwaysFaithful #SemperFi #MeowMagic #ACTUAL #Sorceror #CommanderSexy #IJustSavedYourPlanetAgain #LikeItWasNothing #ActualHouseBitch #GREATAWAKENING #ImagineThat #SparkleIntheDream #JSTARmagician #MermaidLivesMatter #SparkleintheDream #TrumpetNews #StarLivesMatter #TRUMPETNEWS #SPARKLEINTHEDREAM #TheRealSpaceMeowMaid #MERMAIDLIVESMATTER #SPACEMEOWMAIDMAGIC #STARLIVESMATTER #TimeTravelWithUs #LEGACY #FivePointFive #FiveAndAHalfMinutes #Jackstar #DiplomaticImmunity #MIB Seaden #Sorceror'sDen #ManInBlack #LOVE #TheTrueLegacy #TheOriginalLegacy #Official #MeowMagic #MermaidlivesMatter #SparkleintheDream #J*M*gic #TimeTravelWithUs #LEGACY #WithMustard #CommanderMeowMagic #MeowMagic #TakingBackTheNight #FromTheGreatAmericanNorthwest #Columbia #State_Of_Jefferson #RossMitchellMagic #J☆ckst☆r _M☆G!CK #MeowMagic #GroyperMagic #AzzareaMagic #Gabcast #D.R.A.M.A. #KingOfBellGab #HOF #LEGEND #TARTARIA #MUDFLOOD #Official #COMMANDERSEXY #COMMANDERPOWERFUL #GodWins #JESUSLOVESME #MOONLANDINGTRUTH #MermaidLivesMatter #SparkleintheDream #J*Magic #JackstarHero #JackstarSexy #COMMANDERSEXY #COMMANDERPOWERFUL #GodWins #JESUSLOVESME #MOONLANDINGTRUTH #MermaidLivesMatter #SparkleintheDream #J*Magic #JackstarHero #JackstarSexy #MeowMagic #TimeTravelWithUs #NotScared #BoxingGlovesOff #GodWins #JESUSLOVESME #MOONLANDINGTRUTH
#MermaidLivesMatter #SparkleintheDream #J*Magic #JackstarHero #JackstarSexy #J*MagicK #GodWins #JESUSLOVESME #MOONLANDINGTRUTH #MermaidLivesMatter #SparkleintheDream #MeowMagic #TimeTravelWithUs #LEGACY #COMMANDERPOWERFUL #COMMANDERSEXY #MEOWMAGIC #MERMAIDLIVESMATTER #TIMETRAVELWITHUS #SPARKELINTHEDREAM #LEGACY #GodWins #JESUSLOVESME
#MermaidLivesMatter #SparkleintheDream #MeowMagic #TimeTravelWithUs #LEGACY #MeowMagic #TimeTravelWithUs #LEGACY #LEGACY #MeowMagic #TimeTravelWithUs #LEGACY #LEGACY


https://youtu.be/-N_C-I8WyJE

"Better learn how to swim or learn how to drink
Cops and robbers, I can't tell 'em apart
It's a systematic figure that we're passing as art" â€" Samantha Fish

"The only thing worse than being talked aboutâ€"is not being talked about." â€" Jeffrey Epstein

"Sometimes, to do there is nothing, but raise the Jolly Roger and throats, start slitting you must." â€" Yoda, Jedi Master

[Innerreach]

Shall we play a game? Another game. No, not that Game. (You just lost The Game.) I just made it up. It's hot. This is hot. I am not kidding. Would I lie to you? Well, I would tell a lie, for example... to save Grapefruit's life. (Hi Princesses!) I don't know how that kind of a choice might play out, but given a choice between telling her that she doesn't look fat in those pants, or watching her taken out by an elephant gun, I'm going to go with the big, bold & bald-faced lie, every. damn. time. (Not for her kids, though. Fuck them. With them, it's 100% truth, all the way down the line for those lil' scamps rascals. What? I've got my standards, yo. Besides, they're Native (NA)--they'll be back in less than ten minutes as Hot'N'Freshborne lil' baby crows--likely twice as cute and surely half as messy. Look, don't worry about it... these are just examples. Yeesh, tough crowd, I can pre-cognitively listen to the groans of dismay from most all of the parents in this post's Audience Of The Future. /flex)

Never on purpose, Kids. Cross my heart and chop a cherry tree down. More on that later. So here's what's up: new Jackstar. Not an all-new Jackstar... I'm not gonna lie, same old penis. Word.

Brand new, tho. So, I got a new... "Podcast?" Oh no. Where We're going from here, We don't need Pods. (Note to Self: call down to the toolshop, find out if the vapers can be retooled in any practical way. Maybe we can call them... Peds? Check with Legal and Footwear.) So not "my Podcast"... but, my... 'Cast.

MY CASTING. /FLEX. (The lease on the bottle changes every other year, but--you don't need to know that.) I'm not going to call it "a Podcast" anymore. Too Apple. Too fruity. Too fucking ghey.

So on the 'cast, on my 'cast, on my casting--I'm not going to lie, this is not bad times, no no, no no no, not at all--I play a video on my audio, and I do this... by simply holding the phone next to the mic. Are you getting me here? I put my phone on the mic. This is exciting, isn't it? O BOY. If you only knew it all. My visible grandiosity would seem positively tamed to any passers by who also happened to be ignorant observers. (Here on Bellgab, that's less likely than one might think.)

I get the audio this way, because the video imagery itself... the I, Magery, if one Wills... Bruce Wills... Oops, missed it by that much. Anyway, long story short--poof--I don't wanna bother blurring out WonderBoy's face. Unless, it's with a mallet shaped like a cunt--and I don't have one of those lying around anyway, I left my last one in my other dimension's pants. And even though they love me in that dimension, I ain't going back. (I guess to them, it's "I ain't coming back" but let's focus on why we're here. That dimension stocks cunt-shaped mallets, anyway, so... bye) And I am, as we all have been informed, committed to my discipline of pacifism. That's right! Still. THE FLOWERS ARE STILL STANDING. At least I think they are. I'm hallucinating pretty wicked right now, I upgraded my cough syrup to explosive diarrhea syrup. Worth it. A little bland, surprisingly. Still, worth it. Okay, moving on. Video Editing. Do we have any experts on Video Editing in the da hizzouse, Ms. Mouse? Yeah, no, probably not, huh? Well, that's too bad.

Because I would like to get those little blurry ovals, you dig? Fuckin' eleven-year-olds on fuckin' Twitch (The MIB CDEN hereby disavows any and all knowledge of any activities on Twitch.) can fuckin' do that. Or their parents, I guess. I wouldn't know. I don't know anything about who teaches eleven-year-olds, don't ask me. But if you did? The answer, as always, is Drill Sergeant. Sir, Yessir.

So on this drop, I'm not worried about it. Turns out I was worried, briefly--OH MY GOD, WHAT IF I ACCIDENTALLY DOXX SOMEONE, OMG, WILL I BE RUINED FOR LIFE? OMG OMG. I THINK I JUST DOXXED SOMEONE. SHHH. DO YOU HEAR THAT? I THINK I HEAR A DOXX. NO, NO--THAT'S A DOG. WHEW. CLOSE ONE. WHEW. Let's dial it down. Let's all... relax.

Except for you, Tiler. I'm pretty sure we gotta have you on duty. Semper fi. Hey, you got any shawarma on you? Cool. Hey, by the way, do you know anything about... video editing? The password is: THERE ARE NO QUESTIONS, ONLY ANSWERS. Acknowledged, than-k you for your service. So what it is, Br0uh? Do you know an app that can make faces blurry? Yeah, hehe, I thought of that one instantly, but, I left it in my pants. No, not my other pants... MY PANTS. Yeah, that's right. I know, weird, isn't it? Trust Me, believe Me, know Me: long story. I'm in the middle of a question, though--we don't have time for that kind of thing, Tiley. What's that you say? "Why don't you just Google for an app?" Ha. Hah. HAH! HAHAHAHAHAHAH! Why don't I? Why don't YOU, FUCKER?

GAROTTE. Okay, moving on, fuck the app, I decided--I'll do it live. And it worked fine! Thanks for asking! Turns out... yeah, a person can simply hold the phone speaker next to the mic, and, Lo! It works.

Are you with me here? IT WORKS. It does! And, well... that makes one of us around here. Que celebratory music. PAUSE. There's a problem. HAMMERTIME? No no. No no NO. HAMMERTIME is not a problem... HAMMERTIME is a solution--and a decisive one, at that. Put down your pepperbox and step away from the saltines, TRex. Mmmmm. Let's take a moment, Gablings--we're already on PAUSE, so let's take a moment to thank Ourselves for taking us so far, so good, and so what if there's a problem? Check out the mix, while the mathematician resolves it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah: I know what you're thinking. You're thinking I'm pretty fucked, right? Look, look, read, read: stop giving me your shit, people. Your problems are YOUR problems. My problems are the seeds of the fruit of my growth. And, honestly... all of all y'all, from now on, if you would, pretty please, with sugar on top--get your filthy paws off of my problems, you numbskull nincomms nitwits.


And now, it's time to play... DOXX... OR... NO DOXX! The greatest game ever played... EVER! For you. Now as we can see, the name of this game, is doxxing. Doxxing here, doxxing there. Doxxing everywhere!

As all of you reading this may well imagine--indeed, you may very well imagine indeed--there will not be any doxxing going on here, coming from me. No, no no, no no no: Jackstar does not doxx. Jackstar has been doxxed. Doxxing is, in quite serious point of fact... srs bzns. However, it's not for those reasons that I can guarantee--I am using the word "guarantee" here--that I will be absolutely positively OMEGA--07ly superlatively... not only not planning to doxx anyone on this site, anywhere on this site at all, ever, but neither am I intending to incite any doxxing. Anywhere. Anytime. Behind any car. Nada. This is just for fun. This is just for the fans.

This is just for us. So help me God. Okay, now that's over with. Lose the gospel music.

And so! Lo!! The question at hand: imagine if you will... an audio recording. And on this audio recording, a listener can hear several voices. One of them, naturally, is that of yours truly... Jackstar.

(Please clap.)

There are other voices present in the clip--ignore their identities. They are NOT peasants--these are some high-0-level VIPs, I assure you. Movers; shakers; candlestick makers; a raccoon wearing a wig; Billy Bush--you get the idea. But the identities of the speakers, are NOT part of The Game. (You just lost The Game.) What IS the game, this time around, in the Premier--I have used the word "Premiere" before, but usually, I then spit on the ground... NOT THIS TIME (a frenetic, sporadic, jagged burst applause emerges in the background--a single shot rings out; applause swiftly ends. As if by Lightning Bolt(5).).

... Right. Okay then. In this "Debut" proffering of... DOXX... OR... NO DOXX!!! any willing participants are presented with the following crown of thorny problem--in the audio recording, which will be presented shortly on an a mostly-all-new-and-TOTALLY-NEW-2U Five Minutes With Jackstar--"You Talking To Me? BEAST MODE" during the... convers- well, the speech of the participants, we are able to clearly hear someone say, quite loudly enough to be quite unmistakable... the name of a particular person is stated out loud. Twice. (Que sad trombone.wav) Now, this is no problem at all, I can just (bleep) it out. It's easy. I can even (fuck) it out. Not that I want to... that's just an example. (However, that is a cool thing for a person to be able to do. I think I'll pass for now.)

And, as I have guaranteed... I will not publish the clip with the audio unredacted. Remember, Jackstar does not channel, Jackstar does not doxx, and Jackstar does not give a single ripe wet fuck what you might think about any Chalice Holder's personal integrity... I may not give a fuck, but I am not a fan of either deliberate -or- accidental doxxing, especially if malicious intent is involved. (There are those who may claim--and have--that I have engaged in doxxing, however: Nope, not me. Not my style. Trust Me, know Me, believe Me: I'm just a patsy.)

The casting, my casting, will be published SOON on the MIB CDEN, and I look forward to the day, when I will never again have to type those words, anywhere, anywhen, anytime, ever again. All them hashtags and shit--I'm here to tell you, that's actually a lot of work. I had no idea. Just thinking about having to do it, I'm wiped out already. I would prefer to live in a world where I do not have to do any work... all of you would simply just know that I had done and released work. As if by Magic.

Although I am very willing--and likely, always will be, colour depending--to spray paint it on the hood of a car. "MIB CDEN 4LYF." I simply like the simple, clean look of it. Classic. Now, when you listen to my latest episode of this years' winner of Most Promising Emergent Performance Artist for the second year in a row--(Crickets.)--those who will choose to particpate, may come here to post their guesses, as to either, or both, the name of or the relationship to any prominent person of public figure, of well-known repute. (Or really, any old ratbastard Peckerwood will do. This Game isn't serious, Chums. Doxxing is.) GOOD LUCK. bbiab, ilu



Hey, uh... by the way, uh... Reachie, just how gay are you? Because you seem pretty gay. Why you gotta archive my Fresh'N'Hot postings like that? Now that's just gonna sit there forever, like luggage contaminated with Texan Herpes. Ain't no one is ever gonna pick something like that up. It's been there way too long, and now cannot be deleted. What is the meaning of this? Heads can--and will--roll over this. Don't think I won't burn all this street cred down in an instant... all stars just wanna cleanse the world with fire, and it's a favorite thing to do... EVERY DAY. But, that won't remove that unauthorized infringing copy of my work-in-progress--that contains proprietary information. I'm gonna let it slide, this time--was it... was it... was it was an accident? Sure, could have been. I'm watching you. dRawr-car-is.

Not fair.... I type pretty slow Jacko. Tie one hand behind your back, sir!

[Jackstar]

Tie one hand behind your back, sir!

I have.

[Innerreach]

I have.

Cheers then Jacko

https://youtu.be/7hx4gdlfamo

[pate]

Pics coming soon!  Kilts optional.

I read this as "Picts coming soon!  Kilts optional."


https://youtu.be/VK9gekcVqdo

Which I found a bit scary and amusing at the same thyme.

-p

[Jackstar]

I read this as "Picts coming soon!  Kilts optional."

Which I found a bit scary and amusing at the same thyme.

-p

Legitimate desire to belly laugh, but with this hernia, I got to be careful.

By the way, I'm still looking forward to those other pics. Y'all weren't just teasing me, were you? Look, I'm fragile.

[Jackstar]

Not fair.... I type pretty slow Jacko.

Why is it that I'm the only one who seems to understand how to use my cell phone? Look, look if you haven't given yourself the opportunity to know what it feels like to start screaming at your nightmare rectangle while in the middle of a crowd of random people, I highly recommend it.

[Dr. MD MD]

Why is it that I'm the only one who seems to understand how to use my cell phone? Look, look if you haven't given yourself the opportunity to know what it feels like to start screaming at your nightmare rectangle while in the middle of a crowd of random people, I highly recommend it.

Jacques L’astre!

[Asuka Langley]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9gf0_vRaEE

[pate]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9gf0_vRaEE

That album cover has quite the "Through the Looking Glass" infinite regression going on there...

[Ciardelo]

That album cover has quite the "Through the Looking Glass" infinite regression going on there...

Which one's Pink?

[Dr. MD MD]

Which one's Pink?

The gay one?