George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[michio]

I used to really enjoy the predictions shows.

Not any more.

Both parts of the 2013 Predictions shows were terrible but Snorge's half was twice as bad as Ian's -- and that's really saying something.  I won't listen to another predictions show unless Knapp, Simone, Art himself  or someone new and sane hosts it. No way will I listen to another one of those shows hosted by Ian, Snorge or, God forbid, John Be Unwell.

Yes, it's a difficult choice. There's frequent snorting and chortling with an appreciable number of decent caller predictions from @deaconpunnett, or ridiculous amounts of caller to Noory ass schmoozing with the usual gun-talk, meaning too little predictions (sub-par) and too much small talk from "it's not my job to tell you what I think" Noory.

[HAL 9000]

Here's a great Borgus creation from 2007 I've heard on one of the Art Bell streams a few times & always cracks me up. His impression of simple george is dead on.

http://borgus.com/mp3/borgus-noory.mp3

I don't blame you as this is ancient around here, but this link was first posted over 4.5 years ago here:

http://coastgab.com/index.php?topic=122.0

and a few times after that... welcome with your first post   

You can listen to all of his parodies here:

http://www.borgus.com/mp3/

[Sardondi]

I swear Snorge always states that he was in the Navy for 9 years but according to both his Wiki page and his bio on the C2C site, he was actually in the Navy Reserve for 9 years, which is something quite different, I think. I believe being a reservist is a part-time gig, serving one weekend a month and two weeks a year. And reservists are offered direct commissions, not presidential commissions as he apparently claimed.

I hate to split hairs about this, especially since I'm no expert on the matter, but I find it annoying that Snorge would, er,...."accidentally" make it seem that he was something more than what he was. No offense to reservists! Serving in the military in any capacity is something deserving of respect and gratitude -- even for Snorge! It's just that I hate when Snorge appears to be publicly stroking his...ego. (What did you think I was going to say he was publicly stroking? Perverts!)

In any case, I suspect the skill that earned him a commission offer was his ability to serve as a human paperweight.

I agree, with a little edit. You're right that reserve service ordinarily is part-time duty much like National Guard. However, it's quite possible to be Reserve and also on active duty, as George apparently has referred to when he mentioned resigning before his unit was activated for Persian Gulf/Iraq Theater duty. These days it's practically a foregone conclusion that a reservist will do some time on active duty. But because George was interested enough in his personal convenience and self-preservation to have resigned his commission before receiving orders to go overseas, I would be very surprised if he had been active for very long, if at all.

[jinwicked]

I wish this turdmonger would quit playing Pink Floyd as bumper music.

[EnterDragon]

ROFL. Noory flipped out on the guest when the guest said he stopped talking because he worried that he couldn't hear the commercial break approaching.  Noory told him -

"You worry about bigfoot and I'll worry about the bumper music"!  LOL !!!

[ziznak]

that's what happens when you step on noory's balls.  All he really knows anything about is bumper music and interrupting the guest to tell them a break is coming.  Start moving in on his territory and snore boy gets all pitbull on yer ass. 

haha they just mentioned the spirit science vids... i love the lil spirit science guys

and they just let a drunk lady on... lol classic coast to coast....

[sleeplessinca]

OMG! Disciplines the guest!  So awkward. 

I love the part when he confuses the guest with ufos and bigfoot with some hamhanded question. 

Also classic when the guest starts in about the psychedelic aspects of perception (always wakes me up) and Snoorz cranks the bumper, rudely chops off the guest with a flip "there's the bumper" and cuts to commercial.  Did it on purpose. 

Why do I even listen?

[valdez]

     Jerome Corsi has been talking about this upcoming war with Iran for how long now?  Christian Wilde's website is pushing turmeric at a whopping 40% discount for those who act now. Talking with archaeologist Stephen Mehler, George related an incident where somebody stopped him on the street and asked him when he was going to travel to Egypt and "do a show from there?"  Never, because George doesn't really care enough about this crap to go anywhere beyond schmoozing with adoring fans aboard the Queen Mary.  M.J.Miike wrote a novel called "Big Foot vs Chupacabra" taking the award for "dumbest title of the year for a book by a c2c guest."  And it's only January.  Good job.  George wondered if big foot might be a genetically engineered creation (by Monsantos, no doubt), to which M.J. told George that big foot sightings have been around longer than the technology necessary to do such a thing.  George responded, in a bit of a huff, with "well, who knows?'  Eh, the kid knows, George.  The kid knows.  George believes big foot is an advanced race that may have entire cities below the earth.  And they come to the surface to do what?  Catch squirrel?  Or, as Ian Punnet once wondered, to take a crap?  Towards the end George wondered, in that serious tone he is known to have, if  "we will ever get to the point where we will find out for sure" of the existence of big foot.  Yet only about a year ago George said he didn't want to know the truth because "it would take all the fun out of it."  And the money, George.  Don't forget all the money.

[Juan]

Bigfoot comes to the surface for the same reason the space aliens come here.  To harvest weed.

[Eddie Coyle]

"You worry about bigfoot and I'll worry about the bumper music"!

I see a new CoastGab header in the future.

         I caught 45 seconds of the show(about 3:20 am in the east) and right at that very moment. Funny as hell, it was at least 8+ minutes from the break, too.

[expat]

I thought this was the gem of the night:

You know what? You never know.

[MV/Liberace!]

From that December 17, 2000 article:

"Could that really be just a coincidence?"

OMFG.  :

haha, yup... i noticed that, too. 

[MV/Liberace!]

I don't blame you as this is ancient around here, but this link was first posted over 4.5 years ago here:

http://coastgab.com/index.php?topic=122.0

memories... sigh.

[Juan]

warning - there are some sNooryies in there.

[CrabbyOld Bat]

I agree, with a little edit. You're right that reserve service ordinarily is part-time duty much like National Guard. However, it's quite possible to be Reserve and also on active duty, as George apparently has referred to when he mentioned resigning before his unit was activated for Persian Gulf/Iraq Theater duty. These days it's practically a foregone conclusion that a reservist will do some time on active duty. But because George was interested enough in his personal convenience and self-preservation to have resigned his commission before receiving orders to go overseas, I would be very surprised if he had been active for very long, if at all.

Thanks for the additional info.

I'm sure it's just more of my "hater" personality coming out, but I wouldn't be surprised to learn that Snorge found out ahead of time about his unit's upcoming activation/deployment to the Middle East and that's why he resigned his commission at such a convenient time.  ("I don't believe in coincidences.") After all, it stands to reason that his job had something to do with communications (again, most likely as a human paperweight) so being privy to orders that had not yet been carried out would not be out of the question.

Based on Snorge's much-repeated and highly suspect account of nearly being killed by a lone pizza roll, the Navy Reserve should be thrilled that he never entered active duty. He no doubt would have been a casualty of stupidity even before he reported, but the cost of the man hours, paperwork and subsequent coverup attached to the investigation might have bankrupt the Navy. 

[PB the Deplorable]

I swear Snorge always states that he was in the Navy for 9 years but according to both his Wiki page and his bio on the C2C site, he was actually in the Navy Reserve for 9 years, which is something quite different, I think. I believe being a reservist is a part-time gig, serving one weekend a month and two weeks a year. And reservists are offered direct commissions, not presidential commissions as he apparently claimed.

I hate to split hairs about this, especially since I'm no expert on the matter, but I find it annoying that Snorge would, er,...."accidentally" make it seem that he was something more than what he was...

George's job was to bore, confuse, and frustrate the enemy, although they didn't tell him that.

[RJ]

George's job was to bore, confuse, and frustrate the enemy, although they didn't tell him that.

Same thing he has been doing to his listening audience/enemy for 10 years.

[Sardondi]

...I'm sure it's just more of my "hater" personality coming out, but I wouldn't be surprised to learn that Snorge found out ahead of time about his unit's upcoming activation/deployment to the Middle East and that's why he resigned his commission at such a convenient time.  ("I don't believe in coincidences.") After all, it stands to reason that his job had something to do with communications (again, most likely as a human paperweight) so being privy to orders that had not yet been carried out would not be out of the question.

Based on Snorge's much-repeated and highly suspect account of nearly being killed by a lone pizza roll, the Navy Reserve should be thrilled that he never entered active duty. He no doubt would have been a casualty of stupidity even before he reported, but the cost of the man hours, paperwork and subsequent coverup attached to the investigation might have bankrupt the Navy.

Heh. Yeah, about the "hater" attitude, I sometimes feel guilty about whether I've lost sight of all objectivity about George. But then I review just enough of the man's bone-deep lack of curiosity and his breathtaking idiocy, which is at heart nothing more than intellectual and physical laziness and a contempt for his listeners, and I lose all that guilt stuff.

You're right that units in line to deploy have very good idea they may go within, say 6 months or so. And simple common sense told all levels of the military that after 9/11 nothing would be the same again. I don't think George had specific, precise knowledge that his unit would be activated, but I am confident he drew a logical conclusion it would soon come to pass; and I am just as confident he made a decision that he would avoid active service since it wasn't convenient for him, and he would prefer life in the US.

What I allege is very serious, since it impinges George's personal honor and integrity. Tens of thousands of Americans in the Reserve or NG have had their personal lives turned upside down for almost 10 years, as they've been sent for as many as four or more tours of active duty in Iraq/Afghanistan/Persian Gulf (not to mention the active personnel who have gone even more in some cases), but somehow George avoided that. I don't say he's a coward because I have no evidence of that. But it certainly seems like he chose personal convenience and his civilian career over duty to country.

memories... sigh.

It won't be too long before you'll hit 20K posts in just the GNS Compendium. There's somethin' goin' on out there.

I thought this was the gem of the night:

     Quote from: George "Malaprop" Noory date=last night
             You know what? You never know.

Words fail...and clearly for George as well.

[Pragmier]

http://business.highbeam.com/435553/article-1G1-68111059/nighthawk-wants-rule-air


That's about as good as I can do when it comes to finding evidence of some prior radio existence.

Did Noory get his moniker from the Midnight Caller series which ran in the late 80s?

[someguy]

Here's a great Borgus creation from 2007 I've heard on one of the Art Bell streams a few times & always cracks me up. His impression of simple george is dead on.

http://borgus.com/mp3/borgus-noory.mp3

ahaha that's perfect

[b_dubb]

What I allege is very serious, since it impinges George's personal honor and integrity.

HA!

[ItsOver]

At least there's no question concerning Jorch's competency as C2C host. 

[Morgus]

Did Noory get his moniker from the Midnight Caller series which ran in the late 80s?

possibly, Noory seems to always steal names and can't seem to come up with one on his own...

[Morgus]

when a guest is well into an interesting subject and story, Noory always tries to butt in and try to say "lets go to some calls"
he kept trying to do that with last night's first hour guest but the guest kept on talking so Noory could only get in "lets go to..."
it was pretty funny, Noory obviously not listening to the guest and only acting like a robotic drone with his fixed rigid format.

[ItsOver]

I get the impression Noory is like The Old Man on "Pawn Stars."  Instead of listening and comprehending what the guest is talking about, Jorch is either preoccupied with playing blackjack on his computer or nodding-off to slumber land.  Unlike The Old Man, though, Jorch has no discernible talent.

[ziznak]

I just noticed that my grandfather and Noory have something very funny in common.  They both tend to say shit that means absolutely nothing.  One of my favorite from my grandpappy is: "you don't know what you know until you know it."   I don't really blame my grandfather though.  He's 90 and his mind is going... George, on the other hand, has no friggin excuse.

and my all time favorite waste of breath phrase ever uttered:
"it is what it is"
A few years ago it had become a bit of a white trash mantra round these parts.

[Morgus]

Over at the FF, they uncovered in the deep forum archives an interesting thread from 10 years ago when Noory was just starting to take over c2c.
Its very interesting to read the comments of listeners back then to go with Noory's 10 year c2c anniversary this week.
Sounds very familliar to this day, including Noory's dumping of a fav c2c guest William Henry, with no on air explanation - as has happened to other Noory guests since then, a pattern of things to come:
http://www.fantasticforum.com/ubb/Forum30/HTML/000074-3.html

[Sardondi]

I just noticed that my grandfather and Noory have something very funny in common.  They both tend to say shit that means absolutely nothing.  One of my favorite from my grandpappy is: "you don't know what you know until you know it."   I don't really blame my grandfather though.  He's 90 and his mind is going... George, on the other hand, has no friggin excuse.

and my all time favorite waste of breath phrase ever uttered:
"it is what it is"
A few years ago it had become a bit of a white trash mantra round these parts.

ziz, you're missing out on some actual wisdom there.

[ziznak]

you splainnit uh me?

[MV/Liberace!]

It won't be too long before you'll hit 20K posts in just the GNS Compendium. There's somethin' goin' on out there.

that's right... and coming up on a million page views for just this one thread.  ponder that.  one MILLION opportunities to expose noory's suck.  i'm proud to have participated in that.