George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[Morgus]

The claim that lots of people are having Gaim "tv show"  Beyond Belief parties made me spit out my beverage laughing.

Those people were probably just Tommy and a bunch of his relatives - all just watching to secretly laugh at Noory? 

[Major Ed Damien]

I think it would have been hilarious if George had elaborated a little more last night on the cricket bat beatings administered by his teacher:

"And do you know that every time Mr. McGillacuddy used that cricket paddle we could see his raging erection?"

"Unbelievable."

[PB the Deplorable]

He said my supporters:

Asked me to run for prez
They canvassed and researched and found there was a good base of popular support to run
As my name had become known to the public due to becoming c2c host
Of course I am much better known to more since then
I considered running for prez but decided I could do More good here
I still think so and still have to decline

Utter nutcase.    ...

George as a simple nutcase.  Had not considered that

[b_dubb]

twenty somethings have looks but the older woman is the one who knows how to rock world in the sack

[wr250]

[attach=2]

i woke up long enough to hear george mumble something about a 44mm gun used for a shooting. i think the  quote is :

well he said 40mm or 9 mm. but wait he knows his guns (or so he said just after the clip below) .

[albrecht]

[attach=2]
well he said 40mm or 9 mm. but wait he knows his guns (or so he said just after the clip below) .

I doubt the kid used a 40mm. Maybe a .40 caliber,  but doubt he wheeled one of these into the school, George.
http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bofors_40_mm

[Mind Flayer Monk]

I doubt the kid used a 40mm. Maybe a .40 caliber,  but doubt he wheeled one of these into the school, George.
http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bofors_40_mm

It is possible the kid steered a small warship into the area.

[washere]

Has anyone been able to get a photo of NOORY WITHOUT HIS MUSTACHE? He mentioned 2 or so nights ago that he accidentally shaved half of it off when his clippers broke, and he had a show to film the next day so he had to shave the whole thing off after having it on his lip for 40 years. Can't believe none of you have found/posted a pic!

http://bellgab.com/index.php/topic,3242.msg301633.html#msg301633

[yumyumtree]

The original is De mortuis nil nisi bonum, and yes it means "Say only good things about the dead." My version would translate to "Say only bullshit about the dead." GOD I hate explaining my jokes.

Sorry, but that was Latin.  Latin is no joke.

[washere]

[yumyumtree]

I admit that I follow Robert the Doll on Twitter.  And I would love to go to Key West but not just for that.  I also would like to see the Hemingway cats.  That being said, it's troubling to see grown men spooked by a doll, or any toy.  What has happened to American manhood?

Dolls are very interesting, but not as supernatural instruments. They reflect the culture from which they come. Though evidently bigger than most, Robert is probably about standard for a turn-of-the century doll. My father was born in 1920 and passed down some of his toys.  They are not like contemporary toys. I don't know why Robert was in the rafters after the hurricane.  Weird stuff happens in disasters. The point is, many famous dolls have had creepy characteristics.  For example, Barbie was modelled after a German "sex doll" that Ruth handler and her husband saw in Europe on vacation in the 50s. I don't know if that means life-size sex doll and don't want to know. But my mother was creeped out by the late fifties ponytail Barbie, so I got the bubble-hair Barbie.  My aunt, on the other hand, didn't like Midge. Look at the cabbage patch kids.  I always found them a bit creepy.  Bratz Dolls? No thanks. Many modern dollmakers try to duplicate the look of real babies and with modern technology, it's increasingly possible.  But the effect may still be unsettling to people. Many people remember the Seinfeld episode in which George was spooked by a doll that looked like his mother.  Get a grip, folks, you men, especially.

[washere]

[Nick el Ass]

Now that Honey Boo Boo has been canceled here is George's chance to fulfill his life long dream of finding stardom via tv in his own show on the TLC network as the star of Here Comes Noory Boo Boo. Tommy can play the roll he is fit for... Tommy June.  They can have other kids like Alex and JPW too.

[136 or 142]

Head of federal reserve, thieving vice-prez Tom Danheiser again

Economics genius George would do away with the Federal Reserve.

[Juan Cena]

But who would be Tommee's child predator boyfriend?

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

Has anyone been able to get a photo of NOORY WITHOUT HIS MUSTACHE? He mentioned 2 or so nights ago that he accidentally shaved half of it off when his clippers broke, and he had a show to film the next day so he had to shave the whole thing off after having it on his lip for 40 years. Can't believe none of you have found/posted a pic!

Awhile ago, I posted one of him with a painted mustache drawn by a makeup artist on Jesse Ventura's show.. but hadn't found one sans makeup yet.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

I think it would have been hilarious if George had elaborated a little more last night on the cricket bat beatings administered by his teacher:

"And do you know that every time Mr. McGillacuddy used that cricket paddle we could see his raging erection?"

"Unbelievable."

Welcome to the insanity, Major.

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

I doubt the kid used a 40mm. Maybe a .40 caliber,  but doubt he wheeled one of these into the school, George.
http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bofors_40_mm

You never know.  He might have stolen an armoured car.

[Major Ed Damien]

Welcome to the insanity, Major.

Thanks! I had already remote-viewed your welcome!

But I missed all the Ebola infections!

As George would mispronounce it:

"Buzz-are."

[GeorgieForPresident2216]

Thanks! I had already remote-viewed your welcome!

But I missed all the Ebola infections!

As George would mispronounce it:

"Buzz-are."

Hey man, so long as you get the important stuff right.  You were probably looking in the other direction regarding the Ebola scare.

[Nick el Ass]

But who would be Tommee's child predator boyfriend?

Didn't dipshit Noory have a regular guest that married a 15 year old girl?

[Major Ed Damien]

Hey man, so long as you get the important stuff right.  You were probably looking in the other direction regarding the Ebola scare.

Well, to be completely honest with you, I was remote-viewing some porn of the future.

It doesn't look good, George.  People have very sad looks on their faces as they get it on in one hundred years. 

Something bad must have happened to the sun.

Also, I remote-saw that you changed your mind and DID run for president.  You came in a distant third behind Chelsea Clinton and one of the Bush grandkids.  I think waiting until you were 87 was not a good idea.

You looked like a yellow, decomposing Saddam Hussein, thanks to all the turmeric.

Sorry for the bad news and my weirdly remote detachment from all of it, but that's how things are going to be.

[Treading Water]

twenty somethings have looks but the older woman is the one who knows how to rock world in the sack

I was going to say "too late."  But you had me at "in the sack."   

[Immy]

Jorch was in full immature mode last night. The Robert the Doll story was interesting but he has trouble when a guest tries to tell a linear story. Joshua P. Warren tried to relate the RtD origins and stupid Jorch kept jumping ahead what he considered the juicy bits (the doll "screaming", etc) and asking questions that were further down the timeline. More than a few times you could hear Warren pause and adjust his train of thought to accommodate Jorch's ill-timed interruptions. He did the same thing with the haunted house couple a few weeks ago. So frustrating from a listener's standpoint.

Also, Jorch & Tommy addressed the Beeyond Bleef "TV show" designation, saying that people stream the show thru their flat screens. More ridiculously, he claims people have "viewing parties". Sounds like another Jonestown in the making.

[b_dubb]

I was going to say "too late."  But you had me at "in the sack."   

It's my new cologne. Taintco's "Turmeric Nights". I have hot-to-trot menopausal chicks following me around wherever I go. And my ability to follow a conversation and ask meaningful questions has evaporated. I have to weigh the ... weight ... of ... is it possible ... aside from interpretation ... that something has .... OMFG IT'S HAPPENING TO ME!!!

[wr250]

It's my new cologne. Taintco's "Turmeric Nights". I have hot-to-trot menopausal chicks following me around wherever I go. And my ability to follow a conversation and ask meaningful questions has evaporated. I have to weigh the ... weight ... of ... is it possible ... aside from interpretation ... that something has .... OMFG IT'S SUM THINS HAPPENING TO ME!!!

fixed

[paladin1991]

And can you show me on your doll where Tommy touched you?

ETA: Well, hell, Juan beat me to it.  But it's still friggin' funny.

[laserjock]

Has anyone been able to get a photo of NOORY WITHOUT HIS MUSTACHE? He mentioned 2 or so nights ago that he accidentally shaved half of it off when his clippers broke, and he had a show to film the next day so he had to shave the whole thing off after having it on his lip for 40 years. Can't believe none of you have found/posted a pic!

Heh, he's wearing a falsey until it grows back?

[ziznak]

Speaking of talking to the dead...

im alive and well brother monk... nice to see you guys are still out here!

[nextgen.fm]

Why can't I get women like George can?