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Haiku for Noory-san

Started by aldousburbank, February 23, 2011, 05:14:27 PM

The General

Quote from: aldousburbank on August 30, 2013, 10:26:53 AM
First, five syllables
Then come seven syllables
Then George Noory sux
OR, three beats,
and then five more beats,
and George Sucks.

stevesh

dave comes to coastgab
still no instant love for him
never posts again

art is due back soon
noory knows his ass is grass
suck up to haters

george says how are you
guest replies I'm fine, and you
next index card please

george only knows TV
twilight zone mentioned each show
mumy, kiss my ass

noory lives in fear
his bete noire looms at coastgab
eddie fucking coyle

Lemmiwinks

Ten summers gone by
George Noory becomes lazy
Pays no attention

The General

George is like Fredo.
"I can handle things, I'm smart!"
You broke my heart, George.

lonevoice

Quote from: stevesh on August 30, 2013, 01:25:58 PM
noory lives in fear
his bete noire looms at coastgab
eddie fucking coyle
Ahahaha!

stevesh

it's beyond belief
we all thought impossible
worse than coast to coast

danheiser screens calls
nice to some, ass to others
may be bi-polar

linda moulton howe
obviously hates noory
shows up for stipend

a long decade gone
george re-ups with coast to coast
sell my premiere stock

george goes to wedding
nearly dies in mexico
tell us another

george steps on his dick
the king speech was infamous
yes, he's getting worse

every show with
george's science advisor
hoagland reach around

stephen quayle comes on
noory doesn't talk at all
dear god, please shut up

without exception
noory flirts with female guests
throw up in my mouth

aldousburbank

OMG, stevesh, your haiku sonnet is F-ing beautiful!  Especially this almost shat myself-

Quote from: stevesh on August 30, 2013, 02:37:33 PM
every show with
george's science advisor
hoagland reach around

stevesh

Thanks. Here are some more:

damnable haiku
like eating pistachios
once started, can't stop

remote viewer dames
hasn't been right even once
mail-order wife left

no coincidence
john david oates is on coast
in your face, art bell

city of angels
or the gateway to the west
noory sucks the same

ouch, my tender mouth
call tommy, he knows the way
take flashlight to work

katherine albrecht
chips are the mark of the beast
harvard phd ?

yo, wilbur allen
fuzzy photos aren't 'samples'
sit down and shut up

the prophet john hogue
thinks he is nostradamus
love the doofus hat

the numbers lady
she can find your one true love
hasn't worked for george

pothead john b wells
please buy my geiger counters
shotgun out the door

politics forums
yorkshire pud and paperboy
walls and walls of text

The General

Stevesh found his muse
substandard radio host
pizza roll mustache

The General

Quote from: stevesh on August 30, 2013, 04:26:00 PM
politics forums
yorkshire pud and paperboy
walls and walls of text
ha ha
nice

stevesh


time to read the news
no more dead baby stories
tommy let me down

dexter monterey
reincarnated noory
once should be enough

noory brags of gifts
money from books and TV
all are still waiting

george in hawaii
make-believe new studio
punked by his network

zz top listen
gibbons is noory's best bud
never heard of george

twilight zone classic
to serve man - it's a cookbook
hey, remember that ?

noory sings elvis
he may have other talents
dancing with the stars ?

bill from west hartford
yes, you are an atheist
no one gives a fuck

date doesn't like dogs
noory leaves, stiffs the server
if true, real dick move

OK, I'll stop now.

sleeplessinca

Quote from: stevesh on August 30, 2013, 04:26:00 PM
Thanks. Here are some more:

remote viewer dames
hasn't been right even once
mail-order wife left

the numbers lady
she can find your one true love
hasn't worked for george

Like a fire hose. 
Glaring inconsistencies.
Find my sunglasses.

Quote from: stevesh on August 30, 2013, 05:21:03 PM

bill from west hartford
yes, you are an atheist
no one gives a fuck

OK, I'll stop now.




Don't stop - you're on a roll! Or, as George would say, you're on a rule.

MV/Liberace!

the title of this thread still makes me laugh.

George wants to improve
Far from perfect, please help me
It lasted a week

stevesh

sherri tenpenny
don't vaccinate your children
special place in hell

we like graham hancock
does south american drugs
really walks the walk

hey, ty bollinger
eat shit and die, dog fucker
you can't cure cancer

too many confabs
george and sean david morton
remember: dogs, fleas

mary roach's books
sociological stuff
really miss ian

george knapp subs for art
no more ufo ghetto
awesome journalist

rn joyce riley
really cares about our vets
her DVD rocks

aldousburbank

This guy sucks so bad
The show's a fucking trainwreck
another haiku

aldousburbank

across the nation
George your show blows, gale force winds
and around the globe

aldousburbank

Quote from: stevesh on August 31, 2013, 06:11:01 AM
we like graham hancock
does south american drugs
really walks the walk
which is to say that
this path may not be for you
myself always has

(added post post) 3 haiku doofus post sequence. That ain't right. Goodnite.

aldousburbank

bell gab member names
are always so intriguing
all but one, Gnoory

SR-71

Quote from: aldousburbank on September 01, 2013, 07:14:34 PM
bell gab member names
are always so intriguing
all but one, Gnoory
How is my name "intriguing"

aldousburbank

Quote from: SR-71 on September 01, 2013, 07:18:29 PM
How is my name "intriguing"
Aircraft, or old guy?
Why who do you think I am?
The numbers lady?

SR-71

Quote from: aldousburbank on September 01, 2013, 07:24:40 PM
Aircraft, or old guy?
Why who do you think I am?
The numbers lady?
I do love planes and I am a pilot too.

aldousburbank

Same.  Cessna 152. (In my youth.)


George thinks Hai-ku means
How to say 'sneeze' in Chinese
Tom shrugs and agrees

aldousburbank

summer soon is past
haikus come and haikus go
George always sucking

zeebo

LMH is guest
GN can now stay silent
OMG good show

UFQuack

These are really good!
Steve-SH is prolific
Haiku thread takes off

And it's good for us
but it's bad for Noory-san
Premiere is unfair

zeebo

Conversation now
Is finally getting good
"Okay, next caller"

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