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Dumb Americans at Bell Gab

Started by Stellar, August 08, 2020, 07:07:24 PM


ItsOver

Quote from: Asuka Langley on August 14, 2020, 02:50:34 PM
You forgot inbred


At least the one on the right has the decency to cover up.  The thing in the middle is a real jewel.  :P

Jackstar

Quote from: K_Dubb on August 14, 2020, 02:58:35 PM
You guys must make up your minds:  I am either a hapless naif or a sophisticated whore.  I am perfectly happy playing either but I cannot do both.

Nice false choice, GEOS. Into the woodchipper you go.

SredniVashtar

Quote from: ItsOver on August 14, 2020, 03:00:47 PM
At least the one on the right has the decency to cover up.  The thing in the middle is a real jewel.  :P

And she still wouldn't fuck you. Even in the unlikely event you could get it up.

Asuka Langley

Quote from: ItsOver on August 14, 2020, 03:00:47 PM
At least the one on the right has the decency to cover up.  The thing in the middle is a real jewel.  :P

Can you imagine being a Nazi in WW2 and having these creatures as comfort women? I think i would rather shoot myself in the head with a Walther PPK


K_Dubb

Quote from: Jackstar on August 14, 2020, 03:01:20 PM
Nice false choice, GEOS. Into the woodchipper you go.

You are just mad I am having fun with pate.  Go sulk at your mermaid until you can be civil.

Jackstar

Quote from: K_Dubb on August 14, 2020, 03:17:06 PM
You are just mad I am having fun with pate. 

... I'm not mad! Solid state.


Quote from: K_Dubb on August 14, 2020, 03:17:06 PM
Go sulk at your mermaid until you can be civil.

... She's not mine! Look north.

whoozit

Quote from: SredniVashtar on August 14, 2020, 03:02:29 PM
And she still wouldn't fuck you. Even in the unlikely event you could get it up.
You say that like it is a punishment instead of a gift from god. 

Kidnostad3

Quote from: K_Dubb on August 14, 2020, 02:58:35 PM
He did!  I tried to talk to him about the music we both love and he started patronizing me right away, much as you are doing pretending to teach me about seduction.  You guys must make up your minds:  I am either a hapless naif or a sophisticated whore.  I am perfectly happy playing either but I cannot do both.

My personal favorite is your salacious slut persona.  No, really.

K_Dubb

Quote from: Kidnostad3 on August 14, 2020, 04:19:29 PM
My personal favorite is your salacious slut persona.  No, really.

Mine too, sailor boy!  :-*

Dr. MD MD

Quote from: K_Dubb on August 14, 2020, 04:39:01 PM
Mine too, sailor boy!  :-*

You’ve got his number...and he’s single too. ;) ;)

K_Dubb

Quote from: Dr. MD MD on August 14, 2020, 04:41:15 PM
You’ve got his number...and he’s single too. ;) ;)

Hell yeah fuck Shreddie and his stupid punt; I'm on an airboat, baby! 

SredniVashtar

Quote from: K_Dubb on August 14, 2020, 04:43:47 PM
Hell yeah fuck Shreddie and his stupid punt; I'm on an airboat, baby!

What a mercenary little bitch! He'll force you to listen to his Glenn Miller collection, and it will serve you right!

SredniVashtar

Can we please get back to the subject under discussion? Fascinating as it is to discuss the erotic misadventures of an ageing queen, I think we need to return to the topic of how useless and moronic Americans are. Stellar is to be congratulated and I withdraw any remarks I may have made about him being batshit crazy. He's clearly a most perceptive young man possessed of a fine moral compass.

Jackstar

Quote from: SredniVashtar on August 14, 2020, 04:57:59 PM
I think we need to return to the topic of how useless and moronic Americans are.


K_Dubb

Quote from: SredniVashtar on August 14, 2020, 04:52:43 PM
What a mercenary little bitch! He'll force you to listen to his Glenn Miller collection, and it will serve you right!

I love Glenn Miller, you tin-eared prig!  One of the more effective adaptations of Debussy you will hear, which should annoy you immensely:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KJFhrLnUywQ

ACE of CLUBS

Quote from: SredniVashtar on August 14, 2020, 04:57:59 PM
Can we please get back to the subject under discussion? Fascinating as it is to discuss the erotic misadventures of an ageing queen, I think we need to return to the topic of how useless and moronic Americans are. Stellar is to be congratulated and I withdraw any remarks I may have made about him being batshit crazy. He's clearly a most perceptive young man possessed of a fine moral compass.

Gasbag.

ItsOver

Quote from: Asuka Langley on August 14, 2020, 03:05:41 PM
Can you imagine being a Nazi in WW2 and having these creatures as comfort women? I think i would rather shoot myself in the head with a Walther PPK


Ha!  I’d request a transfer to Stalingrad to cheer myself up.

SredniVashtar

Quote from: K_Dubb on August 14, 2020, 05:06:56 PM
I love Glenn Miller, you tin-eared prig!  One of the more effective adaptations of Debussy you will hear, which should annoy you immensely:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KJFhrLnUywQ

You're only saying that so he doesn't kick you off his boat. I bet there's Mantovani too.

Asuka Langley

Quote from: SredniVashtar on August 14, 2020, 04:57:59 PM
I think we need to return to the topic of how useless and moronic Indians are.






Jackstar

Quote from: Asuka Langley on August 14, 2020, 05:10:53 PM



Do you have any idea how difficult it is to get them to piss into those little bottles?

ItsOver

Quote from: whoozit on August 14, 2020, 03:35:17 PM
You say that like it is a punishment instead of a gift from god.
It’s amusing how an alcoholic Brit has to stumble into a dumb American forum the few times a year he sobers up enough to find his password.

K_Dubb

Quote from: SredniVashtar on August 14, 2020, 05:10:52 PM
You're only saying that so he doesn't kick you off his boat. I bet there's Mantovani too.

Beautiful stuff -- not a tone cluster to be heard.

pate

Quote from: K_Dubb on August 14, 2020, 02:30:05 PM
I think the Fat Kamps a superior idea, sir.  Less messy, and CANOOOES!

Well, not to stick my fingers into your delicate plum pie:  Perhaps the primary stage of Fat Kamps may be Really Fun.  But sterner measures may be required for certain Jolly Big eFFs that are perhaps tougher nuts, I encourage you to take Shredni's diabolic Ultimate Solution to mind and heart.  Perhaps, a gentle pen-Ultimate level of Fat Kamps is warranted and in keeping of the concepts of the Holy Threes?

I imagine increasing levels of circus atmosphere, tempo and frenzy as the ultimately deserving approach the final crucible of testing?  These are always spit-ball ideas, the direction, management and final disposition of these Fat Kamps is your particular bailiwick.  My only promise in regard to them is that I will on occasions make semi-official morale boosting visits to see how my beloved people are progressing in their struggles.  I will bring our mighty Press Corps to document the humanity, civility and frivolity that will certainly make your Fat Kamps an attractive "working vacation" spot for the afflicted.

I will even conduct personal interviews with certain deserving citizens;  that may be brief, lengthy or moderate as the Individual case warrants.  These meetings may be filmed for scientific research purposes, official Press Release or simple fun;  or not as the individuals (myself and the individual involved in the private interview) deem prudent, fair and just.  I will not engage in Fat Shaming however, I feel it would violate the spirit of the Safe Space I am sure you will create for them.

The above is merely advice, of a pateternal Nature of course:  As a fellow American the actual running of these places is completely in your hands, I just reserve my right to visit them and make sure the shenanigans are kept in a moderate to low range.

Thank you in advance!  It is an honor to serve.

pate/K_Dubb 2020
"We are going to fix this shit"

paladin1991

Quote from: Asuka Langley on August 14, 2020, 03:05:41 PM
Can you imagine being a Nazi in WW2 and having these creatures as comfort women? I think i would rather shoot myself in the head with a Walther PPK


OH, I dunno.  The fat blond sitting on her feeding trough with her sow friends might have some potential as a 'basement girl.'

paladin1991

Quote from: ItsOver on August 14, 2020, 05:09:19 PM
Ha!  I’d request a transfer to Stalingrad to cheer myself up.
Can i bring the fat blonde sitting on her feeding trough?  We could open her up and crawl inside when it drops to -60.

Dr. MD MD

Quote from: paladin1991 on August 14, 2020, 09:18:30 PM
Can i bring the fat blonde sitting on her feeding trough?  We could open her up and crawl inside when it drops to -60.

And I thought they smelled bad on the outside. :o

Kidnostad3

Quote from: K_Dubb on August 14, 2020, 12:45:33 PM
Is a giant queen.





Britain ruled by a queen?  Okay, like most British men, Boris sounds feminine and he wears his hair like a pop tart but to be fair he's got a baby-mama so he may be only half a queen like most British men. 


K_Dubb

Quote from: pate on August 14, 2020, 08:23:41 PM
Well, not to stick my fingers into your delicate plum pie:  Perhaps the primary stage of Fat Kamps may be Really Fun.  But sterner measures may be required for certain Jolly Big eFFs that are perhaps tougher nuts, I encourage you to take Shredni's diabolic Ultimate Solution to mind and heart.  Perhaps, a gentle pen-Ultimate level of Fat Kamps is warranted and in keeping of the concepts of the Holy Threes?

I imagine increasing levels of circus atmosphere, tempo and frenzy as the ultimately deserving approach the final crucible of testing?  These are always spit-ball ideas, the direction, management and final disposition of these Fat Kamps is your particular bailiwick.  My only promise in regard to them is that I will on occasions make semi-official morale boosting visits to see how my beloved people are progressing in their struggles.  I will bring our mighty Press Corps to document the humanity, civility and frivolity that will certainly make your Fat Kamps an attractive "working vacation" spot for the afflicted.

I will even conduct personal interviews with certain deserving citizens;  that may be brief, lengthy or moderate as the Individual case warrants.  These meetings may be filmed for scientific research purposes, official Press Release or simple fun;  or not as the individuals (myself and the individual involved in the private interview) deem prudent, fair and just.  I will not engage in Fat Shaming however, I feel it would violate the spirit of the Safe Space I am sure you will create for them.

The above is merely advice, of a pateternal Nature of course:  As a fellow American the actual running of these places is completely in your hands, I just reserve my right to visit them and make sure the shenanigans are kept in a moderate to low range.

Thank you in advance!  It is an honor to serve.

pate/K_Dubb 2020
"We are going to fix this shit"


Dear sir,

I am loath to vituperate my countrymen while Shreddie is looking as it might be seen as abetting the enemy and I do not wish to abet him in any way -- in any event he provided his measurements once and has no stones to throw -- but, as this issue is very close to my heart (or, rather, my spleen) I plan to spend a great deal of time at the Fat Kamps providing an example of the lithe and graceful enjoyment of the outdoors when not encumbered by great rolls of flesh.  During your visits I would consider it a boon if we were to canoe shirtless as a photo op for the assembled press corps, perhaps accompanied by some of the worthier inmates in order to display their progress and instill pride in their newfound physiques, proud naked sunlit shoulders rhythmically working in a breeze of their own making.

There has always seemed to me to be a fundamental difference in posture when canoeing where men proportioned as God intended perch alertly in the bows ready to deploy their paddles at any exigency while the obese must content themselves with feeble and ineffective flapping as any shift in ballast endangers the narrow vessel.  Any fat man in a canoe will wind up in the drink at some point, helpless to prevent it.

I blush to mention that I will need you to steer as, despite my enthusiasm for the sport, I seem to be attracted to any dangerous obstacles like bridge abutments which draw me like a magnet and, with the inevitable ramming, my lithe and graceful composure tends to suffer.


K_Dubb

Quote from: Kidnostad3 on August 14, 2020, 09:45:05 PM
...he's got a baby-mama so he may be only half a queen like most British men.

A CHILD?  How revolting!  Though many of us have stumbled in our rush to embrace our destinies. 

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