Fortune Cookies I've Disemboweled Then Eaten

[albrecht]

Pamela Quarterly; the lesser known Bond girl.

Suddenly, fatty Jabba craving immaculate buffet again, despite previous NDE complication.

MSG solves the NDE problem, says Miss Moneypenny (who is jealous of Miss Quarterly, right now.)

[Camazotz Automat]

YOUR HARD WORK IS ABOUT TO PAY OFF IN AN IMPACTFUL WAY.



(looks at his crystsl skull hologram wristwatch)

[Jackstar]

 [attachment=1]

[Camazotz Automat]

[attachment=1,msg1425921]

Not just a fortune, but lucky numbers.

But that's not the only extra.

Learn Chinese?!?!

Words and accompanying ideograms!!!

I am so - how do the young people say?

So gelatin.

This revelation alone - micro language lessons - justifies the creation of this topic.

[SpaceMeowMaid]

The last fortune....
Learn Chinese To Feel JOE!?

[Ciardelo]

The last fortune....
Learn Chinese To Feel JOE!?

Oh! You ARE frisky!

It says "To feel" then the Chinese word "Jue" then the ideogram for "Jue"

[Dr. MD MD]

Oh! You ARE frisky!

It says "To feel" then the Chinese word "Jue" then the ideogram for "Jue"

But if one wanted to feel Joe they wouldn’t be averse to it, assuming Joe was OK with it?

[Ciardelo]

But if one wanted to feel Joe they wouldn’t be averse to it, assuming Joe was OK with it?

Indeed. Most Joes are pretty open.


https://youtu.be/WIuL1-JAS5c

[Jackstar]

I am so - how do the young people say?

So gelatin.

It was literally the nicest slope joint I have been in for years. This includes the fabulous "Palace Of China", shut down nearly seven years ago and still fondly missed. This place left it slain, as in place of huge hanging paper dragons, it is hung with multiple massive crystalline chandeliers that looked to have been lit aflame with actual dragonfire, and boasted a huge circular table in the back quarter of the airplane-hangar like dining room. Surely many meetings of The Triads have been planned there, hydrated by the magnificent oblong standing bar against the full sand painting wall mural. I about died to see it & leave.

We were not able to sit down to dine there last night--alas, COVID-19--but the place was legitimately adorned with fabulous decor, and the bonus cookie we received was clearly a portentous omen of great significance.

What I am saying is, we are going, she is driving, you are buying, and I am tasting and/or finishing all of the drinks. I am using the word 'all' here.

[SpaceMeowMaid]

Oh! You ARE frisky!

It says "To feel" then the Chinese word "Jue" then the ideogram for "Jue"

Oh I thought it was Joe. Like that sad little Obama Bestie that's going to Gitmo.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0FQHToI46_w

[Camazotz Automat]

YOUR HARD WORK IS ABOUT TO PAY OFF IN AN IMPACTFUL WAY.

(tapping foot)

Still waiting.

[Camazotz Automat]

YOU ARE GENEROUS AND ALWAYS THINKING OF OTHERS

Ok. But that doesn't really serve me in any constructive way.

Am I going to die in a head on car crash while listening to Side 1 of Led Zeppelin IV?

[Jackstar]

Am I going to die

My nigga. By Grabthar's Hammer, by the Sons Of Warvan... as long as I am around, you ain't nevah gonna die.

So, get off your ass, and get down here.

« Reply #42 [...] 44:42 »

I AM USING THE WORD 'NIGGA' HERE. FORGET ABOUT THE PASSED.

[Jackstar]

Ok. But that doesn't really serve me in any constructive way.

[img]http://bellgab.com/bellgab.gif[/img Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, MP, LP (yes I typed this by hand from memory, yes I am a fucking god, no I don't want to hear about the savings you can offer me on my long-distance service)]

[Jackstar]

YOU ARE GENEROUS AND ALWAYS THINKING OF OTHERS

[Jackstar]

Still waiting.

So, get off your ass, and get down here.

Pawn to King Queen 4.

[Jackstar]

Oh I thought it was Joe.

What did his cock face look like? Asking for a friend.

[Jackstar]

[Jackstar]

YOU ARE GENEROUS AND ALWAYS THINKING OF OTHERS

Ok. But that doesn't really serve me in any constructive way.

Am I going to die in a head on car crash while listening to Side 1 of Led Zeppelin IV?

« Last post by Jackstar on Today at 02:00:28 »

This does not look like anything to me. Nevertheless, I am mandated to point out that I was just able to generate six (6) posts of reasonable-or-better-quality out of just one of this dude's posts, and while I do not know what that means, I am sitting at 0.68% chubb, and that has to count for something.

That is all.

[Jackstar]

« Reply #48 on: The Morning After Wednesday Night You Whore at 02:03:FIFTY-FUCKIN'-FIVE »

that has to count for something.

That is all.

ADDENDUM: say hi to 'urmo' for me. That chick is a fuckin' star.

[Camazotz Automat]

My nigga. By Grabthar's Hammer, by the Sons Of Warvan... as long as I am around, you ain't nevah gonna die.

So, get off your ass, and get down here.


I AM USING THE WORD 'NIGGA' HERE. FORGET ABOUT THE PASSED.

The exquisite synchronicity that I was just now thinking of vocalist Brian Johnson.

(Specifically - regarding the primary lyricist of the Back in Black album - the speculation that Bon Scott to Brian Johnson is as unto to the theory Francis Bacon was to William Shakespeare. A bit apple orangey, I admit, but illuminating questionable authorship being the thrust at this late hour.)

[Jackstar]

The exquisite synchronicity

I actually did conclude you were dead, and I already did mourn, you absolute rat bastard piece of shit fuckhead cuntpacking ace-in-the-shit-hole snot trail short-order slop-cook. How dare you? How absolutely dare you?

Don't answer that--you're still under contract until I decide to buy your half-price ass out. You're welcome.

[SpaceMeowMaid]

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[Jackstar]

Eighth sixth through tenth grade. NEXT

[Camazotz Automat]

LET YOUR EXCITED HEART GIVE AWAY ITS BIGGEST SECRET TODAY

No. I would not do this to my worst enemy. It would cause every signed up member here to be profiled, hacked, and deep checked by the NSA, the ***, and the ****.

(Obviously, some of that would be redundant. You know who you are.)

But, also, the website owner's compound would be swarmed by hardcore Gov Issue MIB* with the misguided belief we had been exchanging bulk encrypted files via Proton.

Hardware would be seized. Gym memberships revoked.

At least thirteen unmarked black helicopters would electronically harass various bellnauts for eighteen months. Mostly a mindfuck bluff exorcism, but disconcerting. Helicopters carry a lot of psychic baggage. They are winged necromanteum mirrors of society.

(* Swarmed by real agents. Not swarmed by some whiney bitch Marines who got their feelers hurt when called out on the hypocrisy of their rap music's lyrics.)

Therefore, I will keep my biggest secret(s) and regift the fortune slip of paper to a cute little Sonic car hop named Jessica.

Maybe she will spill her guts and get us all killed/suicided.

But you can't pin it on me.

I'm just some dude getting a cheeseburger.

[pate]

"A huge fortune at home is not as good as money in use."

Lucky#s: 12, 22, 44, 35, 45, 2

(if those are the numbers that that last Powerball paid out on, I am a dumb-ass)

If nothing else, this made me feel better about my bank account status.  HAH!

-p