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pate/K_Dubb 2020 - "We are going to fix this shit"

Started by pate, July 18, 2020, 04:06:34 PM

Three of the five below are the correct answers, you are invited to choose one. Just remember that the odds are in your flavor, but which is the favorite oddity?

Biden/Harris (D)
2 (7.7%)
pate/K_Dubb (aye)
7 (26.9%)
pate/K_Dubb (eye)
8 (30.8%)
pate/K_Dubb (I)
5 (19.2%)
Trump/Pence (R)
4 (15.4%)

Total Members Voted: 26

Voting closed: November 23, 2020, 09:01:44 PM


Jackstar

Quote from: pate on July 25, 2020, 07:35:39 AM
Following is a short, but in no way exhaustive, list of potential multi-votes that may choose to invest precious multiples of franchise:  Shadow Government personnel (present, former and prospective), Seers (all types of visionaries), and holders of multiple votes that have noticed something in need of repair that has not yet been listed.

https://youtu.be/fmjia0Se7_0




pate

Quote from: Dr. MD MD on July 25, 2020, 04:33:01 PM
8)...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dscfeQOMuGw

That is a good song here is another:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNrAoMwbm9g

We have appropriate lists for both of them!

Doctor, you have not yet spoken of which plum you wish in exchange for your vote.  I believe the position of Surgeon General has an empty chair at my banquet table.  Make sure the plum for that place setting has not been eaten already before you sit, if missing I will contact the maitre d' to have a suitable replacement plum returned to that place.

What do you say, Dr.  MD MD?  Will you join us in the fixing of shit?

In either case, your presence filled out the quorum for yesterday.  I shall now deliver my final thoughts on the "eye" aspect of the Make America Pate Again movement.

The Shadow Government and my re-arranging of its broken shit will be, in my opinion;  the largest, greatest and most monumental fix this great nation has ever seen.  I want to expand the scope and size of the Shadow Government;  for every position at the Federal level there will be a corresponding Shadow Government position.  The same will apply to State and Local governments;  those states and localities without a wise, benevolent and invisible Shadow Government hierarchy already in place will quietly, thoughtfully and discretely receive one.  When it comes time for the velvety glove to be removed from the iron fist it will be this fixing of Shadow Government shit that the velvet glove attends to.

There being nothing more to add to yesterday's business of the "eye" aspect of the Make America Pate Again movement;  and what was said is of sufficient weight, volume and specific gravity to provide a solid foundation on which to build and flesh out later:  I hereby table the offficial discussion of it.  Comments, thoughts and observations may still be made about the issue, but they are neither official nor unofficial.

Thank you in advance!  It is an honor to serve.

pate/K_Dubb 2020
"We are going to fix this shit"



pate

Today, I would like to explore the third and final aspect of the "patian" ideal:  the "I" Party.

This one is self-explanatory, but just in case there are any "left side of the Bell Curve" folks in the reading audience, I will elaborate.

The "I" party possesses a great fraction of the undecided multi-votes.  This is partially because many of them simply do not care about political parties because they are boring.  When this fraction of the multi-vote is introduced to the Make America Pate Again fundamental values of "dog"-petting and beer drinking they will see that politics can be fun again.  In lieu of a plum, I intend to purchase their votes with beer.

They may then help us fix some shit;  this is an intuitive, logical and quite successful campaign tactic for this particular race:  They should be approached with an appropriately marked mail-in ballot and a suitable beer to their Individual taste.  The exchange can be made, and that mail-in ballot can then be added to the stock-piles of the large multiples of votes required to achieve our ultimate goal.

There are also, regular voters that are tired of "just pulling the handle" for whichever party that they lean towards, even they find that party's candidate distasteful, lacking, or to be a "loser."  They will see in the Make America Pate Again movement a clear winner:  either in myself or K_Dubb.  It doesn't really matter which of one us they like as long as the "handle" they pull results in a vote towards one of the three available "correct" choices.

I have more to say on this "I" aspect of pate;  but I wish to again leave the discussion open until, hopefully, a sufficient number of my people to form a quorum have had their say.

Before I go, I wish to clearly state that the normal practice of polite society not having libations prior to 5pm will be relaxed on Sundays.  It will now be allowable to consume adult beverages in an adult manner without public shaming after noon, and attendance of proper Church services have concluded.

Thank you in advance!  It is an honor to serve.

pate/K_Dubb 2020
"We are going to fix this shit
"

K_Dubb

Quote from: pate on July 26, 2020, 10:42:45 AM
In lieu of a plum, I intend to purchase their votes with beer.

Of course you know, sir, that this is how it was done in the good old days before the secret ballot.  Beer tents set up outside polling places and unruly gangs of men armed with staves to encourage the reluctant to exercise their civic duty.  After decades of modern antiseptic and asocial voting, we have forgotten how fun democracy can be.

AZZERAE

Quote
pate/K_Dubb 2020
"We are going to fuck some ass
"

Jackstar

Quote from: pate on July 26, 2020, 10:42:45 AM
In lieu of a plum, I intend to purchase their votes with beer.

I won't allow you to throw away the cider vote this way. What of the proportion of the electorate that is allergic to hops? I don't think you thought this through, I really don't.

Quote from: pate on July 26, 2020, 10:42:45 AM
It will now be allowable to consume adult beverages in an adult manner without public shaming after noon, and attendance of proper Church services have concluded.

My religion now involves guzzling plum wine, right before services start. It's back to the drawing board for you, Chief.

pate

Quote from: K_Dubb on July 26, 2020, 12:53:21 PM
Of course you know, sir, that this is how it was done in the good old days before the secret ballot.  Beer tents set up outside polling places and unruly gangs of men armed with staves to encourage the reluctant to exercise their civic duty.  After decades of modern antiseptic and asocial voting, we have forgotten how fun democracy can be.

K_Dubb, indeed that is exactly the shit that needs to be fixed, and as you say:  when we look back to the Golden Ages where wisdom was rampant across the land;  what seems to be missing now are indeed the shaded places of generous libation nearby to the polling places.  I have seen that unruly men with staves still frequent some polling places, but they offer no drink;  only harsh words and demands.   Voting for pate in any of his splendorous forms should be a relaxing, joyous and uplifting affair.

Quote from: Jackrabbit on July 26, 2020, 04:32:58 PM
I won't allow you to throw away the cider vote this way. What of the proportion of the electorate that is allergic to hops? I don't think you thought this through, I really don't.

My religion now involves guzzling plum wine, right before services start. It's back to the drawing board for you, Chief.

Much like the officially encouraged practice of "Dog" Petting;  the exchange of votes for "beer" is a euphemism, which I note rhymes with baptism which then leads my thought to Pabst Blue Ribbon.  Heineken?  Fuck that shit!

So if you like, you may exchange cider for votes.  Hop-free beers such as Bud, Miller, Coors and Milwaukee Light may also be exchanged for votes;  I encourage those as they will both be easy on the palette AND the campaign war-chest.

Plum wines in exchange for votes or multi-votes is allowed, but only for the highest, most sublime and quality votes or multi-votes.  We would not want to strain the national supply of Plum Wine in the pursuit of our goal;  in fact I believe Plum Wine will now be categorized as a National Security Asset.

Part of the Make America Pate Again first one hundred days initiative will now be the production, distribution, and establishment of a National Plum Wine Strategic Reserve.  These are the types of detailed inventory of the shit-to-be-fixed lists that my people bring to the Make America Pate Again banquet table.  Another small piece of the puzzling campaign is revealed, our political enemies tremble.

Glorious!

Thank you all in advance.  It is an honor to serve.

pate/K_Dubb 2020
"We are going to fix this shit"

Jackstar

Quote from: pate on July 26, 2020, 05:43:20 PM
the exchange of votes for "beer" is a euphemism

Dude, I can't drink a euphemism. NO SALE.

Quote from: pate on July 26, 2020, 05:43:20 PM
We would not want to strain the national supply of Plum Wine in the pursuit of our goal;  in fact I believe Plum Wine will now be categorized as a National Security Asset.

If you only knew how many quatloos the stuff is worth on Rigel VII, you wouldn't even be talking about it right now.

pate

The inclusion of SpaceMeowMaid in today's discussion, in my Rule of Order book;  indicates a quorum is present for this Sunday's business.  I will let that question stand, for the moment.

My thoughts now move to the wording of this poll question which will stand forevermore.

Quote from: Poll Question #1Who is best qualified to fix this shit?
Blind stabbing is not recommended;  perusal of the thread is recommended before final selection.
Choose wisely from the list below:

Biden/????? (D)
pate/K_Dubb (aye)
pate/K_Dubb (eye)
pate/K_Dubb (I)
Trump/Pence (R)

I note that in my constant fixing of shit, I still have not determined the name of Biden's running mate.  Do any of our political spies know the name of this other fool who dares stand against us?  That shit needs to be fixed.

Thank you in advance!  It is an honor to serve.

pate/K_Dubb 2020
"We are going to fix this shit"




SpaceMeowMaid

I am feeling the love. But I cannot drink, beer, plum wine... None of it, so one of you will be drinking for 2... Have you seen Gremlins? Yes, it's like that!
Boarding a US NAVY NUCLEAR SUBMARINE in the Arcti…: https://youtu.be/RXXMJAU6vY8

pate

Quote from: SpaceMeowMaid on July 26, 2020, 08:09:42 PM
I am feeling the love...

Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream;  something about that and love...

I digress! 

Good times.

pate/K_Dubb 2020
"We are going to fix this shit"



pate

Quote from: Jackrabbit on July 26, 2020, 11:31:51 PM


Yes, the poll question.  Must I research the fool that stands with the man of question?

I had hoped for Independent verification;  that guy is so intimately familiar with the taste of his own foot that I would know for certain which toe is his favorite!

This must seem unseemly of me;  is Biden absolutely Sure?  Dry and confident?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oih0oB0m8uI

The Aesop's and Awesomeness List of Crunchy and Catchy Commercial list is now officially endorsed!

pate/K_Dubb 2020
"We are going to fix this shit"

Jackstar

Quote from: pate on July 26, 2020, 11:58:12 PM
Yes, the poll question.  Must I research the fool that stands with the man of question?

I legit have no idea what the fuck you're talking about here. GET IT TOGETHER.

pate

Quote from: Jackrabbit on July 27, 2020, 12:05:45 AM
I legit have no idea what the fuck you're talking about here. GET IT TOGETHER.

That is it.  I am masking up and hiding in an undisclosed basement.  Distinct frwny!

pate/K_Dubb 2020
"We are going to fix this shit"

Jackstar

Quote from: pate on July 27, 2020, 12:45:48 AM
I am masking up and hiding in an undisclosed basement.

If that would work, I'd be all for it. You're already on the edge of cabin fever with a spot of mange, I don't think isolation at the 100-day pre-marker is gonna do your campaign any favors.

AZZERAE

Quote from: Jackhole on July 26, 2020, 04:32:58 PM
My religion now involves guzzling plum wine, right before services start.

Yeah yeah yeah. In M.J.K.'s vinyard no doubt. "Plum wine" code for semen.

Don't talk to me about zazz.

Quote
pate/K_Dubb 2020
"We are going to fuck some ass"


WOTR

Quote from: K_Dubb on July 26, 2020, 12:53:21 PM
Of course you know, sir, that this is how it was done in the good old days before the secret ballot.  Beer tents set up outside polling places and unruly gangs of men armed with staves to encourage the reluctant to exercise their civic duty.  After decades of modern antiseptic and asocial voting, we have forgotten how fun democracy can be.

Secret ballot rules out direct purchase of votes. However, if there is one thing that I have learned watching the idiot Trudeau, it is that you can buy them with promising what you will give them "after the election."

Micro breweries in the USA are hot right now. Why not promise .25 cent a can beer? The government will pay the rest of the cost as a subsidy. You will still get great beer because the public will be allowed to chose the highest quality at the same price as garbage.

It would stimulate the economy (even farming for the raw materials and the transport industry in addition to direct jobs in the brew industry.) I really believe that you can sell this and use it to get elected.

pate

Quote from: WOTR on July 27, 2020, 02:45:52 AM
Secret ballot rules out direct purchase of votes. However, if there is one thing that I have learned watching the idiot Trudeau, it is that you can buy them with promising what you will give them "after the election."

Micro breweries in the USA are hot right now. Why not promise .25 cent a can beer? The government will pay the rest of the cost as a subsidy. You will still get great beer because the public will be allowed to chose the highest quality at the same price as garbage.

It would stimulate the economy (even farming for the raw materials and the transport industry in addition to direct jobs in the brew industry.) I really believe that you can sell this and use it to get elected.

This $0.25 subsidy only is applicable in microbreweries?  I can see the economic benefits of such a plan.

That would certainly help offset the impact of this COVID-19.5 shit that has disproportionately affected the small brewers.  It seems like a good fix.

K_Dubb:  attend!  You are hereby directed, as official Beer Taster for Presence of Poisonous Ideas to begin straw-polling, field-testing and quality-assurance of this foreign, but possibly Tasty, idea.

I believe it may be a solid plank in the Make America Pate Again platform.  It certainly would dovetail nicely with the "Beer" Drinking plank already present.  The idea of a subsidy intrigues me, think of the potential multi votes that might be secured!

We must fix that shit!

You must do double duty on this, for SpaceMeowMaid's sake at minimum.  Two Beers, Chief of Utes:  Walking Dogs;  the campaign may depend on this.  A difficult path you are directed to walk (don't run) upon.

https://youtu.be/owq7hgzna3E

I am certain it will be delicious!

Thank you in advance!  It is an honor to serve.

pate/K_Dubb 2020
"We are going to fix this shit"


K_Dubb

Quote from: WOTR on July 27, 2020, 02:45:52 AM
You will still get great beer because the public will be allowed to chose the highest quality at the same price as garbage.

What sort of pinko commie socialist hell is this?  Sounds like finally ushering in the Workers' Paradise to me, Comrade!


K_Dubb

Quote from: pate on July 27, 2020, 07:11:15 AM
This $0.25 subsidy only is applicable in microbreweries?  I can see the economic benefits of such a plan.

That would certainly help offset the impact of this COVID-19.5 shit that has disproportionately affected the small brewers.  It seems like a good fix.

K_Dubb:  attend!  You are hereby directed, as official Beer Taster for Presence of Poisonous Ideas to begin straw-polling, field-testing and quality-assurance of this foreign, but possibly Tasty, idea.

I believe it may be a solid plank in the Make America Pate Again platform.  It certainly would dovetail nicely with the "Beer" Drinking plank already present.  The idea of a subsidy intrigues me, think of the potential multi votes that might be secured!

We must fix that shit!

You must do double duty on this, for SpaceMeowMaid's sake at minimum.  Two Beers, Chief of Utes:  Walking Dogs;  the campaign may depend on this.  A difficult path you are directed to walk (don't run) upon.

https://youtu.be/owq7hgzna3E

I am certain it will be delicious!

Thank you in advance!  It is an honor to serve.

pate/K_Dubb 2020
"We are going to fix this shit"


Aye-aye, sir!  I may eventually have to change my name to Three Beers given the monumental task ahead but keep your distance because I get a little grabby.




pate

Quote from: AZZERAE on July 27, 2020, 02:21:14 AM
Yeah yeah yeah. In M.J.K.'s vinyard no doubt. "Plum wine" code for semen.

Don't talk to me about zazz.

AZZERAE, old fiend!  Are you interested in joining my new American Foreign Legion to help us fix some shit?  We would love to have you on board!

I like that Gadsen Flag of yours;  "SHUT UP YA DWEEB":  it would make an excellent battle banner.  Sure to incite our enemies into frenzied bouts of misdirected, lashing and un-strategic movement on the field of battle.  If you wish, after you have secured all the available multi-votes in your immediate area, you should begin the steady march northwards and conquer the entire continent!

Organize your militia, I will refer to it as the American Foreign Legion II Corps, SA.  It will have a storied and bloody history, I can see it now!

Wonderful!

Thank you in advance!  It is an honor to serve.

pate/K_Dubb 2020
"We are going to fix this shit"



pate

Today, while we wait for Mr. Biden to become more confident, dry and secure;  I have constructed a few more potential poll questions.  At this point, it is more an exercise in mockery of the feeble-minded old goat than anything.  It is amusing to me that all his enemies already have running mates, yet he idles in pissery and shit;  refusing to get off the pot!

Quote from: Poll Question #1Who is best qualified to fix this shit?
Blind stabbing is not recommended;  perusal of the thread is recommended before final selection.
Choose wisely from the list below:

Biden/????? (D)
pate/K_Dubb (aye)
pate/K_Dubb (eye)
pate/K_Dubb (I)
Trump/Pence (R)

Quote from: Poll Question #2The choices is yours!  Make it tasty:

Biden/????? (D)
pate/K_Dubb (aye)
pate/K_Dubb (eye)
pate/K_Dubb (I)
Trump/Pence (R)

Quote from: Poll Question #3Who is best qualified to select Joe Biden's running mate?

Biden/????? (D)
pate/K_Dubb (aye)
pate/K_Dubb (eye)
pate/K_Dubb (I)
Trump/Pence (R)

I amuse myself at his expense;  his mind so tasty!  I wish to devour it slowly and savor every delightful morsel:  but soon there will be nothing left.  We must fix that shit!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4c3BCWx5Rpg

pate/K_Dubb 2020
"We are going to fix this shit"




Juan

Whitley sounded as though he’s in the running last night. He stopped in the middle of answering a question and Knapp had to remind him of what he was talking about.

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