Minneapolis/St.paul riots

[Jackstar]

I already removed two bricks. I have procured required components. I have passed the required trials.
And now--now--you want me to "do" something. You're gonna have to be more specific with your barding here, I'm not gonna lie. Which is it? Did I not do enough? Did I not do it correctly?
Did I put a little too much mustard on it? I mean, that's possible, but I've never heard that one before. Here, I'll change something.
"Changing" is like "doing" except, it works, so I don't have to. A cute trick I learned while auditing inventory back in 'Nam.
BTW, do you happen to have a recipe for Scotch Eggs? A friend asks. A friend I wish to impress. Empress. Goddess. Whatevah. Something I can squirt acid into without alarming any nearby canines. Just in case.

[K_Dubb]

A charming young maid from Seattle
Presumed with a bard to do battle.
Untried, her first trick
Was an old limerick
Which stunk like a shed full of cattle.
That's nice dear go to bed.

[K_Dubb]

BTW, do you happen to have a recipe for Scotch Eggs? A friend asks. A friend I wish to impress. Empress. Goddess. Whatevah. Something I can squirt acid into without alarming any nearby canines. Just in case.

That hardly calls for a recipe.  Nothing to them just wrap an egg in uncased sausage and fry fry fry.  Deep fry, that is.  You can bread if you want.  Unless you prefer to bake, for reasons that escape me but must be very good ones because you see it done everywhere.

[Jackstar]

Unless you prefer to bake

Okay, for the sake of argument, sure. With a hot air fryer, is that considering "baking" or "frying" or "vaping"? I HAVE ABSOLUTE NEED TO KNOW THIS POINT.

[pate]

... half the man ...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sT1DdO3SISg

[Jackstar]

There once was a famous chess café
Where famous players came to play.
They paid a franc;
Played chess and drank.
And got checkmated all day.

A charming young maid from Seattle
[...]
That's nice dear go to bed.

#1) Not from Seattle.
#2) She doesn't leave it much. Shelter policy.

[SpaceMeowMaid]

There was a Young Man from Kent
Whose Rod was so long it bent.
So to save himself trouble
He bent it in double,
And instead of coming â€" he went!

[SpaceMeowMaid]

There was a young maid from Madras
Who had a magnificent ass;
Not rounded and pink,
As you probably think
â€" It was grey, had long ears, and ate grass.

[SpaceMeowMaid]

A charming young maid from Seattle

That's nice dear go to bed.

Yeah yeah. I did that already!!!

[pate]

... THIS POINT.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QvyI4mWqj0o

[K_Dubb]

Okay, for the sake of argument, sure. With a hot air fryer, is that considering "baking" or "frying" or "vaping"? I HAVE ABSOLUTE NEED TO KNOW THIS POINT.

I suppose it is frying if it says so on the box.  I don't know; I don't fuss with newfangled contraptions.

[K_Dubb]

There once was a famous chess café
Where famous players came to play.
They paid a franc;
Played chess and drank.
And got checkmated all day.


#1) Not from Seattle.
#2) She doesn't leave it much. Shelter policy.

Look, actual shit I can fix!  Let me introduce the concept of "meter":

It might look like an arbitrary shuffling of syllables but, for a traditional limerick, you are looking for lines 1, 2 and 5 of three anapests (da da DUM) and lines 3 and 4 of two.  With anapestic meter you can drop the first beat, as here, or add an unstressed beat at the end (called a feminine ending) as in the Seattle example, but all the lines should all follow the same pattern.

There once was a famed chess café
Where players of note came to play.
They each paid a franc
And played chess and drank;
I checkmated them right away.

Eliminating the redundant "famous" and the passive final line -- in poetry you must go bold or go home -- produces polished lines that fall easily on the ear.  Meter, which together with rhyme forms the foundation of classical English verse,  used to be taught as part of basic poetical literacy but seems to be foreign to most people these days.  Brig is the only one I remember who nailed it on what can't have been her first effort.  Even Shreddie stumbled when he tried -- I laughed so hard.

[SpaceMeowMaid]

There once was a famous chess café
Where famous players came to play.
They paid a franc;
Played chess and drank.
And got checkmated all day.


#1) Not from Seattle.
#2) She doesn't leave it much. Shelter policy.

I love this shelter. My kitty is happy too. Plus the drinks are strong and well, there is the hot action from the sexy sleeper next me! Life is good.

[SpaceMeowMaid]

Look, actual shit I can fix!  Let me introduce the concept of "meter":

It might look like an arbitrary shuffling of syllables but, for a traditional limerick, you are looking for lines 1, 2 and 5 of three anapests (da da DUM) and lines 3 and 4 of two.  With anapestic meter you can drop the first beat, as here, or add an unstressed beat at the end (called a feminine ending) as in the Seattle example, but all the lines should all follow the same pattern.

There once was a famed chess café
Where players of note came to play.
They each paid a franc
And played chess and drank;
I checkmated them right away.

Eliminating the redundant "famous" and the passive final line -- in poetry you must go bold or go home -- produces polished lines that fall easily on the ear.  Meter, which together with rhyme forms the foundation of classical English verse,  used to be taught as part of basic poetical literacy but seems to be foreign to most people these days.  Brig is the only one I remember who nailed it on what can't have been her first effort.  Even Shreddie stumbled when he tried -- I laughed so hard.

Are you my high school English teacher? HI THERE!! Thanks for all the A+s you know I didn't deserve.

[SpaceMeowMaid]

Jacky, do something.

Oh he did something alright, thank you xo

[WOTR]

There once was a famed chess café
Where players of note came to play.
They each paid a franc
And played chess and drank;
I checkmated them right away.

Being as this is now the Limerick education help thread, I am going to ask if the last line COULD have an additional word?
It seems like "I checkmated them both right away" might work? Or am I smoking crack again? If this is completely wrong, I demand an explanation.

Thanks

[WOTR]

I hope trumpet man (or some of the other peaceful protesters) grab Portland's mayor off the street and haul him to the nearest guillotine. The man has become a traitor to the cause...

Portland Mayor Ted Wheeler Thursday evening condemned the actions of rioters who attempted to set fire to a police precinct and blocked the exits while officers were inside. “When you commit arson with an accelerant in an attempt to burn down a building that is occupied by people who you have intentionally trapped inside, you are not demonstrating, you are attempting to commit murder," Wheeler said in a news conference with Portland Police Chief Chuck Lovell.

Sure, he claims that it is because it is giving Trump ammunition to get reelected. But in reality, he is showing his true colours as a coward and a traitor to the glorious revolution.

[K_Dubb]

Being as this is now the Limerick education help thread, I am going to ask if the last line COULD have an additional word?
It seems like "I checkmated them both right away" might work? Or am I smoking crack again? If this is completely wrong, I demand an explanation.

Thanks

It could, making three complete anapests while awkwardly forcing the non-standard pronunciation "checkMATed", except that the pattern set by the oft-used beginning ("There ONCE was a...") commits you to an iamb (da DUM) rather than an anapest (da da DUM) as the first foot.

[K_Dubb]

I hope trumpet man (or some of the other peaceful protesters) grab Portland's mayor off the street and haul him to the nearest guillotine. The man has become a traitor to the cause...

Portland Mayor Ted Wheeler Thursday evening condemned the actions of rioters who attempted to set fire to a police precinct and blocked the exits while officers were inside. “When you commit arson with an accelerant in an attempt to burn down a building that is occupied by people who you have intentionally trapped inside, you are not demonstrating, you are attempting to commit murder," Wheeler said in a news conference with Portland Police Chief Chuck Lovell.

Sure, he claims that it is because it is giving Trump ammunition to get reelected. But in reality, he is showing his true colours as a coward and a traitor to the glorious revolution.

"FUCK Ted WHEELer" is a tidy sequence made up of two perfect trochees, making it very catchy.  You hear it everywhere.

[WOTR]

It could, making three complete anapests while awkwardly forcing the non-standard pronunciation "checkMATed", except that the pattern set by the oft-used beginning ("There ONCE was a...") commits you to an iamb (da DUM) rather than an anapest (da da DUM) as the first foot.

Thanks. I prefer "them both." I would even settle for "checkmated all three right away." I understand that it may be awkward- but it is necessary.

The problem with the original is that it leaves the number of chess players "of note" who descend on the cafe an open question. If they are "players of note," and there are dozens, it seems unlikely that they would all regularly meet at the same cafe. Or, if there are dozens of players, I have to question how good they are (I doubt that dozens of chess players "of note" would live in the same city to meet regularly.)

I assume it is an "open cafe" and that many substandard players would arrive as well on "any given Sunday" and pay their franc. But I doubt the author would brag that he checkmated them.

No, this requires giving the number of players that were checkmated to tie the entire limerick together and help settle the questions that otherwise are left lingering.

[pate]

Rewrite the entire limerick with out the trite "There once was" opening rejoinder.

On a December such as this...

One day in summery bliss...

While Chess masters fingered their lists... 

That last may stretch limits, but initially unwieldy weapons sometimes become a tactical surprise that carries the war to an elegant and strategically correct victory?

Just remember that in General Armchair Quaterbacks abound...

Hah!

-p

[K_Dubb]

Thanks. I prefer "them both." I would even settle for "checkmated all three right away." I understand that it may be awkward- but it is necessary.

The problem with the original is that it leaves the number of chess players "of note" who descend on the cafe an open question. If they are "players of note," and there are dozens, it seems unlikely that they would all regularly meet at the same cafe. Or, if there are dozens of players, I have to question how good they are (I doubt that dozens of chess players "of note" would live in the same city to meet regularly.)

I assume it is an "open cafe" and that many substandard players would arrive as well on "any given Sunday" and pay their franc. But I doubt the author would brag that he checkmated them.

No, this requires giving the number of players that were checkmated to tie the entire limerick together and help settle the questions that otherwise are left lingering.

This is a poem, sir, not the sports page.  Your local paper probably devotes half a column inch to the daily stats, much abbreviated, underneath the weekly "A New Take On Butter Tarts" recipe.

I never liked chess anyway and only joined the club because Erik who rode my bus was in it and he had a blond forelock which was really cute when he wasn't pulling out clumps of it to eat, which I have since learned is a sign of some obscure vitamin deficiency.

While chess-masters finger their lists
And move with their great hairy wrists,
Those hours sitting idle
Grow lumps pilonidal
On cheeks that will never be kissed. -s. 

[Jackstar]

I never liked chess anyway

Pistols at dawn, Sirrah.

[WOTR]

This is a poem, sir, not the sports page.  Your local paper probably devotes half a column inch to the daily stats, much abbreviated, underneath the weekly "A New Take On Butter Tarts" recipe.

This is the problem with "modern" man. Why does it have to be "either or?" You appear to be saying that because it is poetry, it should not concern itself with fact or understanding.

Phaedrus (Pirsig) spent chapters attempting to meld the classical and romantic outlooks of the world in "Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance." Here you have a chance to take a small step towards that reconciliation, and you argue that the effort or adding a single word should not be made as it is "just poetry." Instead, it could be a the first step on a journey to understand the "metaphysics of quality" melding the classical and romantic in a thing of beauty. 

Well... It's your poem. And if, like John, you refuse to consider looking outside of your closely held world view then I ought not to push or criticize.

[K_Dubb]

This is the problem with "modern" man. Why does it have to be "either or?" You appear to be saying that because it is poetry, it should not concern itself with fact or understanding.

Phaedrus (Pirsig) spent chapters attempting to meld the classical and romantic outlooks of the world in "Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance." Here you have a chance to take a small step towards that reconciliation, and you argue that the effort or adding a single word should not be made as it is "just poetry." Instead, it could be a the first step on a journey to understand the "metaphysics of quality" melding the classical and romantic in a thing of beauty. 

Well... It's your poem. And if, like John, you refuse to consider looking outside of your closely held world view then I ought not to push or criticize.

Fine, I scoff at your taunts!  If you insist, you may choose from

I checkmated three right away.
I checkmated fifteen per day.
I checkmated eight who were gay.
Eleven were checkmated, hey!

In each case you will notice the steady, comforting progression of iamb, anapest, anapest which preserves the structure of the poem in perfect classical proportion without throwing an extra syllable in there like you did, like a pimple on a perfect ass.

[WOTR]

Fine, I scoff at your taunts!  If you insist, you may choose from

I checkmated three right away.
I checkmated fifteen per day.
I checkmated eight who were gay.
Eleven were checkmated, hey!

In each case you will notice the steady, comforting progression of iamb, anapest, anapest which preserves the structure of the poem in perfect classical proportion without throwing an extra syllable in there like you did, like a pimple on a perfect ass.

That did not seem so hard for somebody with your creativity. I shall chose "I checkmated three right away."

Speaking of creativity- I see that you laid a camouflaged trap for me. "I checkmated eight who were gay". Can you imagine saying "I checkmated eight who were black? Had I chose this option, it would undoubtedly have indicated that I find myself to be superior to gays- that they do not posses the intellect to win at chess- that they are inferior to the straight man.

I can only assume that I would have been doxed in short order with a dozen locals from the gay goon squad dispatched to my front door.

*The mention of "zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance" has me searching the book for some mention of the contemplation of a handful of sand. I think I recall the main idea- and I believe that the idea can be applied to BLM and the riots "mostly peaceful" protests.

[Walks_At_Night]

Looks like a lovely day in Seattle.  Hopefully K_Dubb and Jack are in the middle of the action.

https://twitter.com/jasonrantz/status/1292542102308495360
https://twitter.com/jasonrantz/status/1292553413327065088

[albrecht]

Looks like a lovely day in Seattle.  Hopefully K_Dubb and Jack are in the middle of the action.

[tweet]1292542102308495360[/tweet]
[tweet]1292553413327065088[/tweet]

It is nice to see that there is a 24/7 protest culture there. Keeps the economy going. It would seem there is a difference between the daytime and nighttime protests. Though one does note that some of the pro-police signage has the sharp point of the wood towards the top. So not designed for planting the sign in one's front yard but could be used pro-actively if a night-dwelling, blood-thirsty intifada junkie happens to awake and venture near.  The pro-police crowd is also lacking in trumpeters. Sure, bull horns are nice, as are chants, but brass is needed.

[pate]

...  The pro-police crowd is also lacking in trumpeters. Sure, bull horns are nice, as are chants, but brass is needed.

I imagine the pro-police crowd, or at least a few among them, have small brass instruments in their pockets...

-p

[K_Dubb]

Looks like a lovely day in Seattle.  Hopefully K_Dubb and Jack are in the middle of the action.

https://twitter.com/jasonrantz/status/1292542102308495360
https://twitter.com/jasonrantz/status/1292553413327065088

Ugh I can smell the spray starch and overheated polyester blends from here.  It's a perfect day; where are all the hot shirtless guys?  I can't possibly support these folks.