Author Azzerae's World  (Read 9040 times)

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Azzerae's World
« Reply #240 on: December 05, 2019, 03:55:12 AM »
Face it, you're just a chatty patty. And your subscriber count is nothing more than evidence that 1600 people are stupid as fuck.

There's actually more than that, but that was actually the most truthful statement you've made tonight. Your autism is hysterical, post often.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #241 on: December 05, 2019, 03:55:24 AM »
Azz, go do a Vegan YT channel with your artwork. I'm sure you and Metron and your other vegan/veggie fruit forum buddies could make it a success on YT. Yeah, right, you're not vegan, though you push their fucked-up fruity agendas.

Maybe an African UFO/Paranormal YT channel might work for your region of the world? But I seriously doubt anyone with an AB listening background will give a shit about your monologues except for your forum buddies.

All this advice from an individual who's spent their entire life on the sidelines as a spectator and critic whose opinion will never be respected or considered.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #242 on: December 05, 2019, 03:58:13 AM »
There's actually more than that, but that was actually the most truthful statement you've made tonight. Your autism is hysterical, post often.

The only thing that ever seems to hurt you is when somebody goes after your show. But its a common problem, amongst lesser developed men, attaching ones self worth to their worldly achievements.

By the time you realise what really matters, it'll be too late.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #243 on: December 05, 2019, 04:01:33 AM »
You were sincerely helping AssStab, since you somehow found artwork that matched each podcast theme. Like WTF. This wasn't custom made for his-her podcast?

You had to get the artwork from Azz somehow...

While they were hot linked, nobody has the right to use those images without my permission. I made them myself, and I own the rights to them. Only by requesting permission for them to be re-used will I consider it.

VC

Azzerae's World
« Reply #244 on: December 05, 2019, 04:01:39 AM »
I can do without the profanity. And will respond in kind, if you can keep it at bay.

I was only being your mimic, as in "fool" :D

Get a fucking life.

Quote
So savour it, fuckhead. Mhmm.

Fuck you.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #245 on: December 05, 2019, 04:01:59 AM »
Somebody should bring a round of bullets to your attention.

It's a good thing you can't afford a gun or a plane ticket.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #246 on: December 05, 2019, 04:02:43 AM »
I was only being your mimic, as in "fool"

Yeah, well, you're getting me angry. Which I'm sure has produced a woody. Try not cum all over your keyboard, I know you're all out of paper towels at this point.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #247 on: December 05, 2019, 04:03:14 AM »
It's a good thing you can't afford a gun or a plane ticket.

Tell us how many subscribers you have.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #248 on: December 05, 2019, 04:08:57 AM »
The only thing that ever seems to hurt you is when somebody goes after your show. But its a common problem, amongst lesser developed men, attaching ones self worth to their worldly achievements.

By the time you realise what really matters, it'll be too late.


You swim in a sea of inaccuracies yet again.




Azzerae's World
« Reply #249 on: December 05, 2019, 04:09:53 AM »
Tell us how many subscribers you have.

Depends which platform specifically, there's multiple spots.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #250 on: December 05, 2019, 04:14:33 AM »
Depends which platform specifically, there's multiple spots.

Just because your ego is disproportionately inflated due to a series of simple numbers on a screen, doesn't mean you have the right to mistreat people for a rush.

Earn a living off your supposed "talent" alone, without working some menial job graveyard shift to feed yourself. Then talk to me.

VC

Azzerae's World
« Reply #251 on: December 05, 2019, 04:14:54 AM »
Azz says to Brig:

Somebody should bring a round of bullets to your attention.

It's a good thing you can't afford a gun or a plane ticket.

Azz had to leave "post haste" from Indonesia claiming and admitting he beat-up someone with Downs and/or in a wheelchair too or was it the same or another person that flew a drone to your window? Meaning, the cops might be after him soon enough to throw him in jail or out of the country too.

My memory is shot on that one. Reload Azz. :D

Azzerae's World
« Reply #252 on: December 05, 2019, 04:24:05 AM »
Just because your ego is disproportionately inflated due to a series of simple numbers on a screen, doesn't mean you have the right to mistreat people for a rush.

Earn a living off your supposed "talent" alone, without working some menial job graveyard shift to feed yourself. Then talk to me.


I'm not sure you're aware of this yet lol but I apologize to burst your bubble... I also do voice over work too.... and that has paid my rent. It's nothing to brag about, however, so I'm not sure why you care about my life lol.

I'm sorry you don't enjoy your life, I also enjoy money and working various shifts, I was told at an early age that I need to work and work multiple jobs. These days I've been able to cut back on my regular gig.

I'm currently home however enjoying your meltdown.... Just in case you wondered.  :)

Azzerae's World
« Reply #253 on: December 05, 2019, 04:26:41 AM »
Azz had to leave "post haste" from Indonesia claiming and admitting he beat-up someone with Downs and/or in a wheelchair too or was it the same or another person that flew a drone to your window? Meaning, the cops might be after him soon enough to throw him in jail or out of the country too.

My memory is shot on that one. Reload Azz. :D



Azzerae's World
« Reply #254 on: December 05, 2019, 04:39:37 AM »
I also do voice over work too.... and that has paid my rent. It's nothing to brag about, however, so I'm not sure why you care about my life lol.

For someone who, when pressed, now claims he has nothing to brag about, you have an air of braggadocio about you that is most unappealing. But its to be expected from an American.

To be frank, the only reason I'm injecting myself into your life now is because you begun poking at me when you didn't get your way by having me as a guest on your gay show. It must genuinely burn your ass that I'm going to be on with MV this Friday - on a show, that while small - is in leaps and bounds far more interesting than you or your abortion of a broadcast will ever be.

I'm sorry you don't enjoy your life, I also enjoy money and working various shifts, I was told at an early age that I need to work and work multiple jobs. These days I've been able to cut back on my regular gig.

I'm currently home however enjoying your meltdown.... Just in case you wondered.

You will be sorry. Oh, you'll be very sorry. You know absolutely NOTHING about my life. In my country and culture, working more than one job means you are a failure. You fat yanks have no idea how much you're despised worldwide ... because your heads are so far up your asses.

The fact you mention cutting back on your "regular gig" as some sort of crowning achievement speaks volumes. Real artists and creators can support themselves fully with what they do from day one. And have never had to kowtow to some superior in their entire life.

I'm more successful than you'll ever be - in all aspects of life - and I don't even need to try. The illusion of the first world/third world dynamic is a lie. Whilst residing in the "first world" you have to work multiple "gigs" to keep homelessness at bay and that means you are flailing. Wildly.

I will never trust you and your intentions with my friends. The people you gaslight and spread discord amongst. Never.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #255 on: December 05, 2019, 04:43:10 AM »
For someone who, when pressed, now claims he has nothing to brag about, you have an air of braggadocio about you that is most unappealing. But its to be expected from an American.

To be frank, the only reason I'm injecting myself into your life now is because you begun poking at me when you didn't get your way by having me as a guest on your gay show. It must genuinely burn your ass that I'm going to be on with MV this Friday - on a show, that while small - is in leaps and bounds far more interesting than you or your abortion of a broadcast will ever be.

You will be sorry. Oh, you'll be very sorry. You know absolutely NOTHING about my life. In my country and culture, working more than one job means you are a failure. You fat yanks have no idea how much you're despised worldwide ... because your heads are so far up your asses.

The fact you mention cutting back on your "regular gig" as some sort of crowning achievement speaks volumes. Real artists and creators can support themselves fully with what they do from day one. And have never had to kowtow to some superior in their entire life.

I'm more successful than you'll ever be - in all aspects of life - and I don't even need to try. The illusion of the first world/third world dynamic is a lie. Whilst residing in the "first world" you have to work multiple "gigs" to keep homelessness at bay and that means you are flailing. Wildly.

I will never trust you and your intentions with my friends. The people you gaslight and spread discord amongst. Never.


Don't worry Azz I'm still your friend!


(Circle Of Friends)

Azzerae's World
« Reply #256 on: December 05, 2019, 04:44:27 AM »
Don't worry Azz I'm still your friend!

I know all the things you've done, and the attempts you've made to sabotage my progress.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #257 on: December 05, 2019, 04:46:38 AM »
I know all the things you've done, and the attempts you've made to sabotage my progress.



That's news to me, please enlighten us all.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #258 on: December 05, 2019, 04:58:40 AM »
Actually, my psychiatrist made it clear to me that the medication she prescribed me has so far helped my self-improvement in leaps and bounds. Therefore it was concluded that I don't require psychotherapy. And for the record, I have gotten A grade medical care from my treatment plan this year, and so I'm doing way better than I was before I last interacted with you on this board.


I'm trying to recall which country you are in... Is there a public system- or is it all private? Do you mind sharing which anti-depressant you are on? I'm kind of curious how it is working as a good friend just changed from prozac and says that the new one allows for a much greater range of emotion (positive and negative.) I had always assumed that the point of them was to dull emotion and was a little surprised to find that the one that is more helpful for him is allowing more emotion rather than less.

Is it 100% medication for you- or is there some other therapy as well?


Azzerae's World
« Reply #259 on: December 05, 2019, 05:04:27 AM »
That's news to me, please enlighten us all.

Chat with me in private if you wish to resolve any of the conflict between us.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #260 on: December 05, 2019, 05:10:52 AM »
Chat with me in private if you wish to resolve any of the conflict between us.


Back in the
(Circle of Friends!!!) 

Azzerae's World
« Reply #261 on: December 05, 2019, 05:20:57 AM »
I'm trying to recall which country you are in...

Finally. Someone decent.

I was in Indonesia, but now I'm back in South Africa.

Is there a public system - or is it all private?

There is a public system, but its pretty terrible. I'm on a private "medical aid".

Do you mind sharing which anti-depressant you are on?

Sure: Serdep. "Zoloft" in American terms. Pretty run-of-the-mill stuff.

I'm kind of curious how it is working as a good friend just changed from prozac and says that the new one allows for a much greater range of emotion (positive and negative.)

While I don't know anything about Prozac, as I've never taken it, this is my experience with Serdep/Zoloft:

At first, it gave me the worst headache I've ever experienced in my life. Like within 15 minutes of taking it. Then, that night, I ground my teeth to the point where I chipped my left front tooth. In the next few weeks, I lost my appetite completely. All I could do was drink weak tea - at the most. For about a month, I was dizzy, only able to lay down, hardly walk ... my heart even felt like it was going to explode one time. Like anxiety on steroids. Another time I felt "high," like numb.

Eventually, I realised that certain delusions I'd had waned (paranoia that loved ones were out to get me, that I was being monitored). I felt different overall, but I just can't describe how exactly.

Then came the giggling fits. I developed hysterical laughter because of a serotonin imbalance ... maybe even created by the antidepressant. And at night, I was having manic, racing thoughts that'd wake me up before dawn.

My mood stabilizer was increased at this point, and I was then administered an atypical antipsychotic, which gave me the most vivid frightmares you could ever fathom. I had bouts of religious obsession and hallucinations about the Devil and Hindu deities at this point. I guess my chemical make up was adjusting to the abundance of active agents rewiring all my neurons.

I had always assumed that the point of them was to dull emotion and was a little surprised to find that the one that is more helpful for him is allowing more emotion rather than less.

All in all, the antidepressant I'm on - combined with the other medications - has definitely reduced my emotional expression. But, for me, that's been a tremendously good thing, because I was always hypersensitive to the point of it being crippling, and just unable to focus or ever calm down in general. So I operate - for the most part - like a more relaxed, rational and calm person.

But that doesn't mean I haven't had bad days. It just means they're way less. I've only gotten depressed to the point of suicidal ideation (like I'm really gonna do it) ONCE in the past while. And that's a huge improvement, because I was on my way to giving up just a couple months ago, when I first got help.

Is it 100% medication for you - or is there some other therapy as well?

I would say, on paper, it seems like its just been medication, but fortunately enough, my psychiatrist has provided some therapy along with the medication she's prescribed. I consider myself lucky to have such a kind, patient doctor ... one who (I personally feel) has gone above and beyond her job.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #262 on: December 05, 2019, 05:39:12 AM »
Thanks Azz;

Quite interesting to hear everything that came around to get you to some stability. It is true- a good doctor (one who cares- not just one who knows the symptoms and the "cure") makes all the difference for treatment.

Do you think that any of the side effects were "psychosomatic"?

I have no doubt that some people (likely you) need to have the emotions reigned in. I just found it interesting that my friend is actually finding the increased range to be a good thing. I think that his previous medication possibly suppressed the good and the bad to the point where it was harder to "feel" and to make a connection with others.

It sounds in his case like he almost needs to learn how to experience the emotions again. In your case, it seems like learning how to avoid the extreme highs and lows is probably more important.

Anyhow, good to see you around again...

Azzerae's World
« Reply #263 on: December 05, 2019, 05:49:43 AM »
Do you think that any of the side effects were "psychosomatic"?

Of course my initial instinct is to dismiss the possibility out of hand.

First I'll tell you why I think not, and then why, maybe, some side effects were.

I felt like I was observing the things that were happening to me, and that they came on out of the blue. So many weird sensations ran through my being that I find it hard to accept that they were all "in my head."

I guess we must remember, nevertheless, that you're communicating with a person who has a lot going on "in his head," anyway.

But, yes, I did read the package insert before taking my first dose. And I did my own extensive personal research on what other people experienced when going onto this medication. So that most definitely could've been something that influenced the sensations I felt.

I have no doubt that some people (likely you) need to have the emotions reigned in. I just found it interesting that my friend is actually finding the increased range to be a good thing. I think that his previous medication possibly suppressed the good and the bad to the point where it was harder to "feel" and to make a connection with others.

It sounds in his case like he almost needs to learn how to experience the emotions again. In your case, it seems like learning how to avoid the extreme highs and lows is probably more important.

Yeah, I definitely needed to dial the feelings down, but could never - for the life of me - manage to do so without eventually popping pills. As I'm sure anyone can see, I'm still "myself," that is I still have my quirks ... but my inner life is much more at peace with things than it once was.

Anyhow, good to see you around again...

Likewise. I doubt this place is good for me. Maybe after Friday night's show I'll bow out from actively using the forum. We'll have to see.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #264 on: December 05, 2019, 06:37:26 AM »
Everyone visit Azzy homepage at azzgab.com

Please ENJOY!

Azzerae's World
« Reply #265 on: December 05, 2019, 06:55:34 AM »

Back in the
(Circle of Friends!!!) 

Such lucky man. lol

Azzerae's World
« Reply #266 on: December 05, 2019, 07:11:12 AM »
Somebody should bring a round of bullets to your attention.

You should cut yourself for this wanker post. Best you can do, I suppose. ::)

Azzerae's World
« Reply #267 on: December 05, 2019, 07:15:48 AM »
Yeah, well, you're getting me angry.

That doesnít seem hard to do.

Azzerae's World
« Reply #268 on: December 05, 2019, 07:17:26 AM »
Yeah, well, you're getting me angry. Which I'm sure has produced a woody. Try not cum all over your keyboard, I know you're all out of paper towels at this point.

Also, I notice how the anger seems to get you all worked up sexually. Sex and violence is a big thing for you, isnít it?

Azzerae's World
« Reply #269 on: December 05, 2019, 07:26:00 AM »
They haven't, actually. I'm able to calm down and concentrate for short stretches now, thanks to my pills.

Here are some of my recent artworks:





Good job, Azzerae.