BellGab.com Archive

Quote from: SredniVashtar on August 04, 2022, 10:17:19 AMOK, if that goober doesn't respond then perhaps you can tell me what proportion of the population is Hindu or Muslim? I would love to argue facts with you, but you have to produce one rather than fishing everything out of your ulcerated butthole.

https://www.google.com/search?q=muslim+hindu+percentage+canada

Are you some kind of Paki inbred villiage idiot that doesn't know how to use the intar-tubes, or an Anglisher inbred villiage idiot that doesn't know how to use the intar-tubes?

Nautical Shore, perhaps both?

Axing for a fiend...

-p

Navigating BellGab on a hand-held device sucks.

Must be something to do with the new SMF version, I prefer the old SMF (whichever one Azz uses)...

-p

Quote from: Dr. MD MD on August 03, 2022, 04:13:26 PMYeah and he didn't like that I saw through the RINOism. Both Bushes were among the worst presidents ever.

Didn't you vote for Obama at one point or another?



Axing for a fiend

-p

The Mojito

This one is either Cuban or Puerto Rican (as far as I can tell anyway).  I was first introduced to these fine beverages at the French restaurant I used to sous chef at.

The classic version involves a sprig of fresh mint (some sort of special variety native to the island), sugar, half of a fresh lime (juiced), rum (white/clear), club soda and ice.

You will need a muddler and a glass, of course.

Into the glass put the mint, some ice, and a spoonful of sugar.  Use a muddler to crush that stuff and release the mint oil.  Add the juice and remnant of half a lime, a jigger of rum, more ice, and 4-6 ounces of club soda.  You can add more mint for garnish, an umbrella, or whatever.



The version of this that is served in The People's Free Democratic Republic of pate differs by the use of Peppermint, Peppermint syrup (one full jigger), and Spiced Rum (brown).  The highly skilled PFDRp bartender also uses only glassware that has been stored in the freezer for at a minimum of 3 hours before the drink is prepared.  The spiced rum used is Admiral Nelson's:



...because he outranks Captain Morgan and the civilian Mr. Meyer.  Probably any rum will suit, whether it be white or spiced (brown).

These are delicious, refreshing, and welcome if one is experiencing a months-long heat wave in excess of 90°F;  as we are in the MidWest (and other parts of God's country).

I think this is a somewhat refined variation of common Navy Grog (Nautical Shore);   it is also recommended as a prophylactic against scurvy:  should one need a strictly Medical or medicinal reason to consume this wonderful elixir.

Prosit!

-p

Quote from: Juan on July 31, 2022, 11:49:22 AMWhat will the Pate administration do when the Chinese commies shoot down Pelosi's plane?

That is an excellent question!

Since politics stops at the water's edge, I would write a strongly worded letter of protest to Chairman Jinping. 

Then I would immediately put together a diplomatic team to continue the Taiwan mission; a bi-partisan team, of course!

I would have Bernie Sanders(I), Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez(D), Elizabeth Warren(D), Maxine Waters(D), Chuck Schumer(D), Diane Fienstein(D), Ilhan Omar(D), Sheila Jackson Lee(D), Joe Manchin(D), Liz Cheney(R), Mitch McConnell(R), Lindsay Graham(R), and Mitt Romney(R) immediately board an airplane bound for Taiwan.

To show the Chinese that I mean business (you can take that to the bank, less my 25% cut!) I would make sure that the airplane with my Bi-Partisan Super Diplomatic Team flies through Chinese airspace on its way to Taiwan, and dare those Godless Commies to try that shit again.

In case things go south, I will have one of my Secret Service security detail nearby with a Briefcase.  In that briefcase will be some more pre-prepared strongly worded letters of protest addressed to Chairman Jinping.

In the interests of maintaining the peace I will probably add an invitation to an Official State Banquet at the White House where I could discuss my strong approbation of these heinous acts with Chairman Xi face to face.  Hopefully, this will not result in a duel, but I reserve my right to be officially insulted and take immediate corrective action.

I hope that this adequately answers your question.

I also hope that you, as my Attorney General, will go over the plan of action I outlined above and make sure that it is legitimate and constitutionally valid.

I thank you in Advance!  It is an honor to serve.

pate/K_Dubb 2024
"WHO farted in the elevator?"

Quote from: Liberace! on July 30, 2022, 09:18:29 PMfort rock scream.jpg

Consider my previous post as a "reject," soor.

Apogees!

-p

Quote from: Liberace! on July 30, 2022, 09:18:29 PMYou cannot view this attachment.

Unfortunately, that image file is just not working for me.  Unless you intended:



Nautical Shore?

-p

I speak for both my shirtless running mate and myself when I say:

EXPAT is one of my more favored Dave-look-alikes:



My Administration already has great plans for a Bronze Statue in recognition of his many fine observations, to wit:

Quote from: expat on July 29, 2020, 07:12:03 AMLast night Gnoory advocated lifting all COVID restrictions and allowing the virus to do its worst on the general population. Well done, George. Perhaps the overworked and terrified staffs of COVID treatment centers across the nation were listening. They're already struggling with short supply of PPE and respirators.

You've heard of the concept of Public Service Radio, right?? I think Gnoory just invented Public Nuisance Radio.

...of which, that being his latest;  and hopefully not last observations herein:  which are always astute and amusing.

@EXPAT, I lift and consume a ceremonious beverage in both your honor AND continued health!  I enjoin you, should your spirit and constitution allow, to join me.

Thank you for your service in Advance!  It has been my profound honor to serve with eweyou!

Delende igNooron est!

Seriously, I hope you are free from pain and at peace in the world, sir.

-p

&

pate/K_Dubb 2024
"WHO farted in the elevator?"

As I recall, and this was also about 40 years ago:



It was Nimoy's "In Search Of..." episode that first introduced a young pate to this intardasting phenom...

Nautical Shore which came first:  the Egg-head or the Chicken-shit?

-p

Two Hundred Eleven, Saturday (FSS Three Day Weekend, FFS) "THUNDERDOME LIGHTNING" : "METHUSULA PROGENY" : "SPITZ FIREDUST"

Quote from: K_Dubb on July 26, 2022, 10:46:18 PM... "My Body is An Abortion" ... and ... "Murder is My Choice" ...

K_Dubb, these are awesome!

I knew I could depend on you to come up with not only one, but two really snappy slogans for this particular KamPain Planck.

In order not to waste one of them, my proposal is that I adopt "Murder is My Choice" for my Political KamPain Stumpery;  leaving you with the equally powerful "My Body is An Abortion" for yours.

Far be it from me to korrect (or otherwise fix shit) your delicate turning of a phrase, but if I might betwixt yore's a touch;  how does:  "My Body is A Bork-Shun" sound?

That has a more distinct MAPA-esque flavor, and you know I am all for bringing that particular flavor to our Banquet Table (as well as delicious plums)!


Your comment about misbegotten offspring that would have "best been strangled at birth" reminds me of another issue that has been plaguing me of late:


My Political Enemies both have suspect, questionable, and/oar otherwise embarrassing children;  a situation I wish to correct.  Since I have, to my knowledge, no natural children of my own:  I am forced to consider a candidate for Presidential Adoption;  of course even though I am somewhat musically inclined I do not wish this Adoption to be Octavian in nature.

This will merely be a strictly Ceremonial Adoption which I will undertake for mine and my People's amusement during the upcoming KamPain and Shadow Administrative cycles (both concurrently and respectively).

In addition to Officially Ignoring this adoptive child's antics, befoulments-of-the-law, and other shenanigans;  I will work closely with Fake Noose and Socialist Networking Organizations to discretely promote the Brand™ of the individual that I adopt.

I want Full and Plausible Deniability of this potential train-wreck adoptive child, to include the extremely prejudicial option of exclusion from inheritance of MAPA properties, titles, and/oar perquisites (to include Plums).

That being said:  I do, in fact;  have a very likely prospect in mind!

Butt first, I would like to hear of any Candy-Dates you might have in mind for this strictly ceremonial position?  Do bear in mind that they will require quite a heavy SeekRutty Detail due to rather extravagant reasons.

Eye have perhaps said two mucks!

Hear, Musaks:



Nautical Shore.

Thank you in Advance!  It is an honor to serve.

pate/K_Dubb 2024
"WHO farted in the elevator?"

Quote from: AZZERAE on July 28, 2022, 10:14:25 AMJackstar has double D's.

Pics (preferably in a bathtub) or it didn’t happen!

-p

Pfizer mRNA vaccine goes into liver and changes into DNA, Swedish study finds

Quote from: https://thearcanelaboratory.com/pfizer-mrna-vaccine-goes-into-liver-and-changes-into-dna-swedish-study-finds/

A new Swedish study published in MDPI found that the Pfizer vaccine goes into liver cells and converts to DNA, challenging claims so far that the mRNA COVID-19 vaccines do not change or interact with your DNA in any way...

Clearly, these Damn Swedes don't understand The Science™:  their hypothesis that this can also occur in vivo is The Scientifically™ impossible to falsify!

Why, in order to do that one would have to take a liver biopsy on an un-caccinated individual, run a DNA sequence on that sample, then caccinnate said individual, wait for this alleged DNA conversion to occur, then take another liver biopsy, run a DNA sequence on that sample and finally compare the pre-caccinated liver DNA to the post-caccinnated liver DNA.

The above is obviously The Science™ impossible, and why anyone would bother to The Scientifically™ falsify an already obviously false The Science™ hypothesis is beyond me.

This obviously ONLY occurs in a petri-dish, and is The Scientifically™ impossible in a human being.  Also, it has absolutely nothing to do with the mysterious cases of liver disease that have been occurring recently.

Obvious The Science™ is obvious!

-p

Two Hundred Seven, Monday "AYE COMM OBLAST" : "METHUSULA PROGENY" : "SPITZ FIREDUST" : "OVER ARCHON" : "EYE DEW"
K_Dubb, Attend:

I have need of your sage political advice.  I am actually loathe to broach this subject, but I imagine the press will eventually corner one or another of us on this issue.

I figure the safest bet on issue is:  one of us takes the pro and the other the con, frankly I do not care which is who between us;  whatever will best secure the highest multiple of the Multi-Vote is the aim, as always.

First off, let me provide an example that may illustrate my deeply held personal conviction on the matter:



I will not attempt to answer the question Baroness Harkonnen's sign asks, that is probably yet another hot potatoe that should probably be left unconsumed on the Banquet Table!

In regards to the Bork-shun question, in Jezebella the Hutt's case, hear;  Absolutely:  she should have an abortion should an unfortunate impregnation occur!  The father of the parasite growing within the sturdy lass should have no say whatsoever in the matter.

Clearly, it would be inhumane and a violation of Human Rights to allow such a pregnancy to continue!

Anyhow, that being said, it might be more in character for me to be the conservative on this issue, as I understand that the type of folk that you will naturally invite to our mutual Banquet Table hold the proposition near and dear to their hearts.

This is the essence of my quandry, my shirtless running mate:  what do we do with this political hot-potatoe?

It might be best that we politely ignore it altogether as if it were a gaseous emanation rudely released in the lift, as it were.

This also leads me to wonder if perhaps the potatoe ration should be restricted from certain, (shall we say family-size?), portions of the population?  I think maybe the Happy Kampers might be able to do without these for a while?

Nautical Shore!

Hear, Muzak:


For your sage, thyme, and open-onion regarding this matter I wish to:

Thank you in Advance!  It is an honor to serve.

pate/K_Dubb 2024
"WHO farted in the elevator?"

Quote from: whoozit on July 25, 2022, 07:30:54 PMCan you prove you weren't stalked and murdered?

Or that you do in fact have a Y chromosome?

-p

Quote from: Richard Groyper on July 25, 2022, 11:34:43 AM

That was informative until some meth-head showed up...

-p

Quote from: Corona Kitty on July 25, 2022, 05:05:50 PMOh okay? Lol wtf.

Daniel, I honestly had forgotten about you...

Hear, a song:


https://youtu.be/DquA6KyHTos

It comes from the heart!

-p

Quote from: Corona Kitty on July 25, 2022, 04:57:23 PMOh not you too, didn't realize a few of you were still upset.

It is upsetting to have my sides hurt so from laughing at you all these years.

Please stop sucking, at least stop sucking in public...  I realize you need the money, still don't you have any self-respect?

That last question was rhetorical, btw.

-p

-p

Quote from: Corona Kitty on July 25, 2022, 04:08:42 PMI purrfurr "creature", or "it".

That is both fake and gay.

I begin to doubt you were born with a Y-chromosome.

-p

Quote from: Corona Kitty on July 25, 2022, 12:47:33 PMMaybe he was trying to sleep with me, my mind has now been altered forever.


#METOO

What are your purrfurred pronouns?

-p

Quote from: ItsOver on July 24, 2022, 02:52:10 PMHa!  I'm just messing with you Pate.   I've missed your jibber jabber.  By the way, will you be running for the Prez position in 2024 or will you just be jogging?

Oh yes, I have already announced that I am running for re-election.  The 2024 KamPain HQ can be found hear:

pate/K_Dubb 2024 - "WHO farted in the elevator?"

I must say that you have been doing a fine job as my Federal Communications Commision Shadow Chairman, I trust you will continue to do so for another term?

Thank you in Advance!  It is an honor to serve.

pate/K_Dubb 2024
"WHO farted in the elevator?"

Quote from: Roswells, Art on July 24, 2022, 08:46:52 AMWhat did she die of? She wasn't that old, was she?

All these people dying makes me want to pursue my lifelong dream of buying a sailboat and fucking off around the world before it's too late.

I'll probably skip Somalia.

If you are hiring on crew:  I would sign up for a leg of the voyage;  with an option to extend.  I might even be persuaded to be a stake-holder in the venture.

Will your boat be large enough to accommodate a small motor-cycle?  That always figured into my similar lifelong dream, I figured it would be useful to have some sort of ground transportation for when I was in port.

Quote from: ItsOver on July 23, 2022, 03:01:02 PMOh, I'm still dead and having nightmares, especially when pate posts.  Or maybe that's just headaches.

You could always put me on your /ignore list (assuming that is functional?) or just scroll through those long bits you have difficulty comprehending.  I do try to limit those, btw!

I will try in the future to use the small easily digestible words in my prodigious lexicon so that yore brane will not ache so.

Good to see you, IO!

I do not promise to cease and desist my use of the text "’" in place of an apostrophe, however.  That is an inside joke that only a few select folk can fully grok.

My Apogees, sir!  If this is not sufficient, I direct you to have your second contact my second and they will arrange for a more formal face-to-face to resolve the unfortunate difficulty you are having!



-p

I particularly enjoy this latest verbiage about the United States Government restricting the ability of the common man to own "military grade" personal weaponry.

If I were to change the sentence above to:

Quote from: Shredded VagTard 7/4/1776 0:dark:30I particularly enjoy this latest verbiage about Her Majesty’s Government restricting the ability of the common man to own "military grade" personal weaponry.

I wonder how it would look on the front page?

Nautical Shore.

-p

Quote from: Rix Gins on July 24, 2022, 03:22:46 AM...all the damage they [sic] caused during the war.   

I get it now;  it was the hobo elite up to their old shenanigans again.

Makes perfect sense now, thanks Rix!

-p

Quote from: Corona Kitty on July 24, 2022, 03:16:46 AM...

See you guy's there.

What are yore purr-furred pronoun’s?

-p

Quote from: Rix Gins on July 24, 2022, 01:19:54 AMWe certainly did.  The winning countries set about trying to prevent another one, but only caused another to happen later on. 

I am Khan-fused about the definition of...



...winning, Nautical Shore?

-p