BellGab.com Archive

Quote from: Ciardelo on January 28, 2017, 06:10:14 AM
We will not discuss man buns, as they are stupid.

Thank you for your corporation.

            You forgot hipster beards. Man buns + hipster beards = turd salad.

     I'm sure it's been mentioned but Neal Stephenson's Cryptonomicon. I mean. After, I think, four tries to get much past the first hundred pages I bailed. More recently, I tried Marcel Proust's Remembrance of Things Past, figuring I should at least try to get this storied work under my belt. No such luck, dude, got maybe a fifth of the way into it and started burning bugs on the sidewalk with a magnifying glass.

         Holy Christ, it is. And how could I forget the great Jessica Hahn. Nassau County skank turned sex goddess. Howard Stern made her a star.

Jessica Hahn by Archibald Heatherington Nasty-Face, on Flickr

Quote
it looked like mel's hole

    Don't talk about my wife that way.

Quote from: lukathing03 on January 24, 2017, 03:13:35 PM
This is all you need

         This girl can share my bunker with me. Not her boyfriend, and not Alex Jones.


[attachment id=1 msg=996489]

Quote from: the_Stranger on January 24, 2017, 04:24:45 PM
http://www.joemygod.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/11/buckets-660x330.jpg
https://store.jimbakkershow.com/product-category/food/entrees/buckets/

      Would that be the Jim Bakker, of Jim and Tammy Faye Bakker fame? Could he still be alive? If so, I think I know what he's selling buckets full of.

Quote from: Robert Ghostwolf's Ghost on January 24, 2017, 02:09:57 AM
This one's for zeebo and the other BG SCTV fans. If you listen to her with your eyes closed, she sounds like Andrea Martin doing Edna Boil.

"So come on down to Tex and Edna Boil's Medical Malpractice Compensation Warehouse and Curio Emporium for all your Badlands needs. Isn't that right Tex?"


https://vimeo.com/183686500

       First of all, what strange timing, because as it happens I just started watching the old SCTV episodes again last night on YouTube. They're all there. That was a formative influence on me, which explains much. And thanks for reminding me of Ed & Edna. As for the blonde lady, you really have to admire these professional announcers; they can take a long copy filled with strange and nearly unpronounceable jargon that sounds like (is) complete gibberish, and deliver it as the most natural sounding, fluid monologue you ever heard. I myself would trip over the words, fart and start wobbling.

      Let's talk some Miley. And Selena. Maybe a little Hilary Erhard Duff. What are your predictions for the lives these now grown women, as they become increasingly desperate has-beens, resorting to ever greater shenanigans to reclaim past glory or drown their sorrows? You can, for example, predict the number of times Miley will appear on the cover of the National Enquirer, make-up smeared all over her face, as she's led once again into the rehab clinic after a three day bender. You can speculate about bestiality porn tapes, Satan worship and incest. You can guess the nicknames of the heroin dealers who will tell all to Entertainment Tonight after having been busted with Selena Gomez's number in their contact list. Don't hold back. What will these doomed divas do? P.S. Doesn't have to be strictly Disney--Justin Bieber may well go anal on TeachMeDaddy.com if things get bad enough.

       This could be seen as related to the Guns thread, or not. Now that spontaneous rioting and violence are the new normal in 'Murica, I have taken to keeping some Get Home Bag type stuff in my car at all times. My interest is just that, getting home, and then, if need be, bugging in. Could be a natural disaster, too, as I lived through one o' them as well. Whether you're into getting home, preparedness, bugging in or bugging out, I would be interested in hearing your list of items and your reasoning. I am always looking to improve my get home assortment. Also, please post naked pictures of your Mom.

      Noticing the thread title "Guns..." I decided to check this thread out and see what it was about. Turns out I started it, six and a half years ago. Hooda thunkit. Guess there were one or two other members interested in the subject too. ;-) Anyway, that's a reminder of how long it's been since I dun used this here site. Now, back to gun discussion. Based on the recent rise in both the frequency and violence of rioting in America, are any of you considering buying a gun (or several) as part of a preparedness type deal? Asking for a friend.

Quote from: JesusJuice on December 13, 2016, 11:48:34 PM

I made the mistake of watching one, just one, of the videos posted here. Now most of my YouTube recommendations are his videos.

        Hey, Jesus, is that Miley sipping a screwdriver in your avatar, or are you just happy to see me?

       

       My impression that you guys are funnin' me only deepens. Yeah, I become more convinced with each of your posts that you're a bunch of rogues, scamps and cut-ups, merciless funsters all.

Quote from: norland2424 on January 07, 2017, 12:13:33 AM
RIP MV 

        This thing that's going around, with another member posting elsewhere the MV was dying, is this for real?

Quote from: Chine on November 10, 2016, 05:08:05 PM
Harvey Keitel bit my roommate's ass. More than once.

    Why did she lie still after the first time? If it was a she.

Quote from: GravitySucks on October 03, 2016, 12:05:23 AM
I voted for Jimmy Carter

        You fool, you could've gotten away with it.

Quote from: jaz on September 27, 2016, 11:13:13 PM
I've never read The Coming Global Superstorm.

          HA HA HA HA!! 

Quote from: deceased on December 31, 2016, 05:30:41 PM
MV is dying. He told me that Bellgab will go offline if the bill hasn't been paid for 31 days. Unless he hands over the reins to someone then this is it.

Happy New Year.

   Now, see, I know you knuckleheads have been known to tell a fib or two, even engage in some hijinks, and, as I mentioned elsewhere, I've been away from the site some. So, what do you say you help a brother out and tell me if'n this the truth or you's just having us on.

      Having only recently made my return after having been away so long I didn't even know MV had reproduced, I have no idea what his current state consists of. Does he still run the site? Does he still post here? Does he still do a show? Does he, in fact, still give a rat's anus about this site or its denizens, or has he discovered that family and certain recently legalized recreational plants make a far superior lifestyle? Oh, and while we're on the subject, does MV still speak to Art, and does Art still appear here now and then either as a poster or a guest on MV's podcast?

Quote from: StarrMountain® 2010 on June 17, 2016, 09:56:09 PM
ColonBlowGab.com

    I like this, or just ColonBlow. I must tell y'all though that when MV first created the site he mentioned the name to me and I said I liked it buy why didn't he name it CoastGag. He replied the he wished he'd thought of that before choosing CoastGab. So now, perhaps, at long last and after many underpants gnomes have made off with their loot in the middle of the night, making you wonder the next morning why you're missing yet another pair, it is time of CoastGag.com

      It's the lack of remote viewing what caused it.

         I find it amusing that people think DD equals big boobs.

Quote from: Evil Twin Of Zen on December 27, 2016, 07:56:42 PM
still finding stuff in my old Science Fiction collection. These are from 1980. Kirk Alyn autographs. I actually ripped out a page from one of my Starlog magazines for the second one.

          He looks like the Pipboy in the first one. And Starlog! Holy crap, that takes me back.

Quote from: Ciardelo on December 27, 2016, 03:08:43 AM
The stalker wouldn't let him even do that I'm sure...and now that he has the COPD...

LOVE LIGHT FRIENDSHIP

          As a guy what has been out of the loop for ages, I know neither about a stalker nor what COPD is. Could some kind soul take a moment to fill me in? A basic esplanation will do.

Quote from: GravitySucks on October 03, 2016, 09:11:08 PM
MV's wife and daughters were due back today. I am sure he has other things on his mind.

       Daughters? Man, I knew I'd been gone for a while but didn't realize how long. Last time I was here, MV had only been married a fairly short time and his wife was working in a diaper factory. It appears I missed one or two things.

Quote from: PB the Deplorable on December 22, 2016, 08:13:11 PM
Something like that actually is one of the things people let go. 

Something to sue over would have been the non-compete.  Assuming there was one, and assuming he wanted to do a show.

           What in the eff. What in the effing eff. I was going to post a mild-mannered query in here and ask if anyone knew the present state of Art Bell (room temperature was one of my feared answers.) I've been out of the loop for ages, you see, and ain't got no idea. It appears our Art is alive and well and still in the thick of it. I have no idea who sued whom about what, or whether Art has actually moved to Hawaii, or what the heck. Anyone feel free to give me a quick recap, I'd be ever so grateful.

Quote from: momijithing~awoo on December 18, 2016, 10:23:21 PM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L_fCqg92qks


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bZh3Nj7HuEo

      momi, as a lifelong Yes fan, I am keen to know when this remix of Owner of a Lonely Heart was done, and any other info ye might have on it. Me not never heard of it. Also, nice avatar, 'cause Japanese girls, man, well, you know what I'm sayin'.

Quote from: Damonâ,,¢Â®Â© on December 12, 2016, 03:28:29 AM
http://edition.cnn.com/2016/12/11/health/worlds-heaviest-woman-egypt-india-operation/index.html

      I was going to make a joke about how they "flew her" to India, like "What, was she airlifted by four army heavy lift helicopters?" But I refrained, see, 'cause I'm sensitive like.

Quote from: Camazotz Automat on November 07, 2015, 11:46:26 PM
The NIKE logo.

Ugly NIKE shoes.

               Amen to that. I get my snob on when I see those.

Quote from: effluenza on November 07, 2015, 03:34:53 PM
I'm a few days late but earlier this week it was both Bryan and Ryan Adams birthdays on the same day.

         <holds head in hands, weeps openly>

Quote from: Keykou on November 07, 2015, 02:52:39 PM
The Archons or Mind Parasites


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UV8smP-8FE0

        Ah, good old David Icke. I particularly loved his video about Jews cooking and eating their young. As a Jew, I could only shake my head in shame, realizing I'd been busted and would soon have to give a full accounting of which relatives I'd eaten, how I'd prepared each--in a skillet or a wok, baked or boiled, etc.--and whether I'd saved the naughty bits for late night nibbling.