Things That Annoy You

[Sardondi]

There's the physique of a man who would be dead about seven years later. In retrospect, Randy Quaid really is maybe the only actor who could accurately portray LBJ's goony essence.

When I first read your post I saw "goony" as "loony", which I was ready to disagree about. Quaid loony? You bet. LBJ, no. But LBJ as goony? Oh hell yes. Coen Brothers kind of goony. Gooned up to ear-level. In the sense of being a goofball, oblivious to efforts to sophisticate and give Cary-Grant-style to. But I also see it as having a aspect of immorality, even evil to it. I can see LBJ enjoying sitting and drinking with Dan Hedaya and M. Emmett Walsh...as they decide who to have tortured to death. Although I'm not so sure I'm ready to think of Randy Q as being as chillingly evil as some of his characters, like Bill in The Ice Harvest.

Still, to compare LBJ to Randy Quaid - ouch. I'd really hate it if Randy has finally descended to some hellish place where he's become Cousin Eddy in Real Life.

As for LBJ being compared to a guy who has been on the run from a warrant for an unpaid hotel bill ("Next on the docket, the case of Patel v. Quaid"), is this right? Somebody please help Randy. And return LBJ's reputation as being a stone cold Texas Mafia politico so we don't have to keep running Shelley over in our minds...

"...And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away."

[PB the Deplorable]

How about in a long concession  line at some event, the couple in front of you finally gets to the counter, and the guy turns to her and says 'What should we get, honey?

No matter what line I'm in that seems to take forever, when it's my turn it takes about 20 seconds for whatever I'm there for.  This is a constant.  What were the other people in front of me doing when they were being helped?  At least no one is up there writing checks anymore.

[PB the Deplorable]

        That I have an in-law, who is just getting into Seinfeld and with the zeal of a recent convert...ugh.
      Him:   "Did you ever see the one when George..."
       Me:  "Yes. In November, 1992"

           Can't wait until next year when he gets into Zeppelin and The Godfather.

Brace yourself - in another 20 years he'll start watching Curb Your Enthusiasm and realize George is Larry David

[HorrorRetro]

It annoys me that pregnancy is now treated as a disease that must be micromanaged for 9 months.  I also hate the "expectant mother" parking next to the disabled parking spots.  We should encourage pregnant women to walk more, not less.  I guess I'm just old fashioned.  When I was pregnant 25 years ago, I didn't see a doctor every week.  I didn't have numerous ultrasounds; I didn't have a single one, actually.  I walked a lot, I did light mountain hiking, and I went camping a week before I had my daughter.  Now it seems women are treated as disabled individuals who can't get through a pregnancy without constant supervision.

I realize much of this has come from us being a litigious society, but I hate that so many women buy into this pregnancy as a disease myth.

Another thing that's really chapping my hide is the use of the word "survivor" in every news story.  Maybe I posted this awhile back -- my brain is addled lately, so I might have.  This use of survivor was really highlighted during this stupid cruise ship story about a month ago.  The media was calling the passengers "survivors."  Survivors of what?  Overflowing toilets and a lack of hot food?  Last I heard, no one had come down with cholera or dysentery.  Yeah, it was uncomfortable for a few days, but that does not rise to the level of "survivor."  :

[Eddie Coyle]

When I first read your post I saw "goony" as "loony", which I was ready to disagree about. Quaid loony? You bet. LBJ, no. But LBJ as goony? Oh hell yes. Coen Brothers kind of goony. Gooned up to ear-level. In the sense of being a goofball, oblivious to efforts to sophisticate and give Cary-Grant-style to. But I also see it as having a aspect of immorality, even evil to it. I can see LBJ enjoying sitting and drinking with Dan Hedaya and M. Emmett Walsh...as they decide who to have tortured to death. Although I'm not so sure I'm ready to think of Randy Q as being as chillingly evil as some of his characters, like Bill in The Ice Harvest.

Still, to compare LBJ to Randy Quaid - ouch. I'd really hate it if Randy has finally descended to some hellish place where he's become Cousin Eddy in Real Life.

Quaid's portrayal of LBJ in the '87 TV movie LBJ: The Early Years has always reminded me of Powers Boothe as Jim Jones, Robert Blake as Jimmy Hoffa...and later Phillip Seymour Hoffman as Capote, where these actors capture the essence of people that we're more than familiar with, but do it with such skill that it's hard to nit pick. George C Scott was great as Patton, but audio tapes of Patton reveal a squeaky, high pitched voice opposed to Scott's gruff bark.

          As for LBJ and Nixon. I say this as someone born after their presidencies...I honestly cannot picture either one of them being elected in this day and age. Zero polish, lacking the telegenic slickness required in these times(which probably began in earnest in '60 with the JFK -Nixon tv debates). Bob Dole and Dukakis being the only nominees since 1980 who didn't look like they were sent from central casting.

Brace yourself - in another 20 years he'll start watching Curb Your Enthusiasm and realize George is Larry David

Funny but true. I've had that very same thought. Though on the bright side, for the first 8 years I've known him it was all Family Guy..so Seinfeld is a step up.

[ItsOver]

How about in a long concession  line at some event, the couple in front of you finally gets to the counter, and the guy turns to her and says 'What should we get, honey?

No matter what line I'm in that seems to take forever, when it's my turn it takes about 20 seconds for whatever I'm there for.  This is a constant.  What were the other people in front of me doing when they were being helped?  At least no one is up there writing checks anymore.

I always seem to get in back of the clown who's trying to process a 30 year mortgage application at the counter.

[Sardondi]

How about in a long concession  line at some event, the couple in front of you finally gets to the counter, and the guy turns to her and says 'What should we get, honey? No matter what line I'm in that seems to take forever, when it's my turn it takes about 20 seconds for whatever I'm there for.  This is a constant.  What were the other people in front of me doing when they were being helped?  At least no one is up there writing checks anymore.

A) The Supermarket Variation: wait until the clerk has totaled the purchase before the person in front of you begins looking around in her purse (I'm sorry girls, but in my experience it's a female at about a 4-to-1 rate) to get her ATM card; or worse, her combination of pre-paid credit cards, in-store credits and the like. I'm not going to gig anyone for having to be creative when paying for what the robber barons charge us for groceries; but I do expect people to pay me the courtesy I pay them when grocery shopping of 1) thinking ahead and 2) being prepared, as much as they reasonably can be, to hurry the hell up.

B) and Variation the Next, Screw Everyone Else, I'm OK: when after sacking up her purchases, the sack boy makes the corporate-policy offer of carrying her groceries out for her...which she accepts. Thus creating a back-up in that line as the check-out must input some, stop, sack; input some, stop, sack; etc. until the sack-boy returns 5 minutes later, with no tip, since that's corp-policy too. Now, I've sacked my own a bunch, but it's awkward reaching across, and I never can seem to bring just one plastic bag off the stand. I suggest to the long-suffering check-out clerks that the sack-boys not leave the line, since that is the bottleneck, and their absence creates a jam. But they wearily tell me abut the corp-policy...

And, yes, I do spend a lot of time in grocery lines, and I've honed my purchasing strategies to a very fine edge indeed.

That I have an in-law, who is just getting into Seinfeld and with the zeal of a recent convert...ugh.
      Him:   "Did you ever see the one when George..."
       Me:  "Yes. In November, 1992"

My parents, in their late 70's at the time, discovered Seinfeld, just a few years ago, apparently during some shows which were uncharacteristically somehow not about  sex. The next Sunday they went to church and told their entire Sunday School class...and later that day their minister...what  a"cute" show it was, and to be sure to catch it. Whenever I feel the need of deep, crushing, disabling laughter I visualize their next appearance at church.

[MV/Liberace!]

She is so cute, so cute! I want to come over and play with her. What a smile! She looks absolutely joyous.

Thanks, ChewMouse. She's a lot of fun.

[PB the Deplorable]

... I also hate the "expectant mother" parking next to the disabled parking spots.  We should encourage pregnant women to walk more, not less...

Just about the only people I ever see using the handicapped spot are horribly obese women with no other readily identifyable handicap.  The very people that should be required to park in the far corner, as to get some exercise..

[PB the Deplorable]

... I've honed my purchasing strategies to a very fine edge indeed...

Is cashier hotness a factor here, or, are your strategies based purely on line speed?

[ItsOver]

I love the self-checkout lanes at one local grocery.  I usually go when there's not much of a crowd anyway and my local store will have at least one self-check out device available with no wait.  No idiots in front of me, no nosy, aggravating cashier or incompetent bagger to tolerate and I can bag my stuff the way I like it and get the heck out of there.

[analog kid]

      Funny but true. I've had that very same thought. Though on the bright side, for the first 8 years I've known him it was all Family Guy..so Seinfeld is a step up.

Brace yourself for the talking bellybutton episode.

[Eddie Coyle]

Brace yourself for the talking bellybutton episode.

         That could be a week away . The local channel that has Seinfeld is currently in 1996-97 season, and since they run shows twice a night...the belly button episode(early 97-98 season) will probably air by next Thursday. Yay.

         As someone who watched the show from the start...I thought the last season was mediocre. But that's to be expected with sitcoms. The shelf life seemed to be 4 years...

[PB the Deplorable]

         That could be a week away . The local channel that has Seinfeld is currently in 1996-97 season, and since they run shows twice a night...the belly button episode(early 97-98 season) will probably air by next Thursday. Yay.

         As someone who watched the show from the start...I thought the last season was mediocre. But that's to be expected with sitcoms. The shelf life seemed to be 4 years...

It might be fun to casually bring it to his atention the producer (Larry David) has cameo appearences in several of the shows

[Falkie2013]

It annoys me that pregnancy is now treated as a disease that must be micromanaged for 9 months.  I also hate the "expectant mother" parking next to the disabled parking spots.  We should encourage pregnant women to walk more, not less.  I guess I'm just old fashioned.  When I was pregnant 25 years ago, I didn't see a doctor every week.  I didn't have numerous ultrasounds; I didn't have a single one, actually.  I walked a lot, I did light mountain hiking, and I went camping a week before I had my daughter.  Now it seems women are treated as disabled individuals who can't get through a pregnancy without constant supervision.

I realize much of this has come from us being a litigious society, but I hate that so many women buy into this pregnancy as a disease myth.

Another thing that's really chapping my hide is the use of the word "survivor" in every news story.  Maybe I posted this awhile back -- my brain is addled lately, so I might have.  This use of survivor was really highlighted during this stupid cruise ship story about a month ago.  The media was calling the passengers "survivors."  Survivors of what?  Overflowing toilets and a lack of hot food?  Last I heard, no one had come down with cholera or dysentery.  Yeah, it was uncomfortable for a few days, but that does not rise to the level of "survivor."  :

One of the things that really bugs me is the use of the term wound/wounded when people are injured.

We used to say wounded only when someone was wounded in combat. Now the news acts if someone gets a wound from a paper cut or something as if its some type of major event.

AND waiters and waitresses who tell you to " ENJOY " your food when they place it in front of you before you've even taken a single bite. It could taste like Alpo for all one knows ( and we've had some really bad food at restaurants ) but they try to tell you to enjoy something before you've eaten it ? WTF ?

Then there's are cashiers who tell you to have a nice day, even though you just want to get your stuff and leave. What if I've had a really crappy day ( particularly during the start of allergy season ) and don't WANT to have a nice day ?



Or customer service people who keep repeating your last name over and over or who keep apologizing when they've not done anything wrong or call you " sir " over and over again or tells YOU that they KNOW how frustrated YOU must be because something doesn't work. Someone really NEEDS to tell these people how to act over the phone. It's not only endemic in customer service but seems to be a series of annoying catch phrases that AT & T, B of A and others all seem to use.

Frustrating is when the pickle jar won't open NOT when your dsl service can't find the damned server at 3 am repeatedly for days, weeks or months. I spent an hour on the phone today with a clueless idiot at A T & T who just couldn't get the concept that their DSL service isn't & hasn't been working right and just doing the above over and over again until I finally blew my stack and she finally connected me with a supervisor who KNEW his job and DID get it. I literally had to tell her to NOT say another word and just connect me with the supervisor.

A few months ago I had to deal with Lexmark. It took me 6 calls to get someone who understood the concept of MAILING me an address label to return my defective printer. They kept telling me to go to my email and print one out when the damned printer wouldn't work !

Then they wonder why I finally lose my temper or why people go into banks, stores and the like and start screaming because they just have had it with stupid people on the phone or in the store.

And also why people finally snap and go postal and start shooting idiots they work with or have to deal with. ( Not that I'm going to do that or anything, though I would like someone to invent either bitch slap o vision or strangle vision, so I could reach through the phone lines and smack the crap out of these people at the end of an infuriating phone call !!!  ).

[Eddie Coyle]

It might be fun to casually bring it to his atention the producer (Larry David) has cameo appearences in several of the shows

       He's one of these people who can watch a show religiously without ever retaining anybody's name. To him Kramer is played by..."that guy who plays Kramer".

       If I were to mention that Julia Louis Dreyfus was on SNL...he'd reply "now?".

       "No, Tommy(what's with that name?) it was actually 30 years ago".

[BobGrau]

...AND waiters and waitresses who tell you to " ENJOY " your food when they place it in front of you before you've even taken a single bite. It could taste like Alpo for all one knows ( and we've had some really bad food at restaurants ) but they try to tell you to enjoy something before you've eaten it ? WTF ?

Then there's are cashiers who tell you to have a nice day, even though you just want to get your stuff and leave. What if I've had a really crappy day ( particularly during the start of allergy season ) and don't WANT to have a nice day ?

You are revealing yourself to be miserable thoughtless cunt completely wrapped up in yourself and cripplingly unaware of other people's existence in your shitty little lifestory.

I can guarantee you have had your food spat in or worse, if that's the attitude you display in everyday life.


However, I agree with everything else 

[Sardondi]

You are revealing yourself to be miserable thoughtless cunt completely wrapped up in yourself and cripplingly unaware of other people's existence in your shitty little lifestory.

I can guarantee you have had your food spat in or worse, if that's the attitude you display in everyday life....

Wow. I'm goin' out on a limb here, but I'm betting you have as well. Spit in the food yourself, that is.

[BobGrau]

Wow. I'm goin' out on a limb here, but I'm betting you have as well. Spit in the food yourself, that is.

Never done it, stopped people doing it before. But empathised with people who have.

[Usagi]

I'm going with Falkie on this one.  If you tell me to have a nice day while you're checking me out, you are making it less likely that I will have one.  Worse, is if you tell me to have a "good evening" and it's like... 2 or 3 in the afternoon.  Man, does that annoy the hell out of me.  Yeah, yeah... I realize that these are people and they have lives and have to deal with their shitty jobs that no one likes just like me and everyone else... blah blah.

At my local grocery store, there is this "friendly" fuck of a cashier who tries to make "pleasant" conversation with every single customer.  "Any big plans for this evening?"  "Chicharones, eh?  Niiiice choice!"  "What's your favorite Will Ferrell movie?"  I feel murder welling in my soul whenever I see him.  But, I've successfully avoided his line for going on two years now.  I will stand in a line with 10 people when his is open to avoid his grinning ass face.

Now, on the other hand, there's a cashier that doesn't bother with such fakery and doesn't even smile.  He's a winner in my book.  In fact, we have such a long history of mutual silence together that we actually talk and smile a little bit now when I check out... and, what do you know, it's genuine.

[HorrorRetro]

We actually had a waitress sit down in our booth with us one time.  She sat down and said something along the lines of, "Hey, what are you guys up to tonight?"  We didn't know this person at all, and we were not even regulars in this restaurant.  We just kind of looked at each other like "huh?"  It was bizarre.

[RealCool Daddio]

AND waiters and waitresses who tell you to " ENJOY " your food when they place it in front of you before you've even taken a single bite. It could taste like Alpo for all one knows ( and we've had some really bad food at restaurants ) but they try to tell you to enjoy something before you've eaten it.

You're right, when they place the plate in front of you, they should say "Fuck you.  I hope you choke to death."


Better tips that way.

[Sardondi]

Never done it, stopped people doing it before. But empathised with people who have.

Well good on ya, and I'm sorry to have suggested otherwise. I've worked food service as well as retail and many other jobs where I've dealt with the cretinous, verminous members of the Great Unwashed we depended on for our sustenance. I understand what it is to be treated like some kind of lesser being; just as I understand the great temptation to respond in some way that says you're not as powerless as they think you are.

As for myself I took it as point of pride that they couldn't break me. Fortunately - and I think this probably made all the difference - I had good, decent, sympathetic bosses, who treated me with fairness. I know this was actually rare in the food service industry, but I got lucky. I had bosses who would even work out beforehand what we would do if things just went all to hell and we got a customer who would not be satisfied until s/he got blood (I found that vicious women could be just as bad as bullying men): we had a little drama worked out, from sham apology all the way up to mock dismissal (we only had to do that once).

But maybe my turn in the food-service industry wasn't all that bad because I'd worked in the hay fields doing 60-hr weeks every Summer since I was 12; or when I was 16 that I began working 30-hrs per week as what they then called an "orderly", and which would now be a "nursing assistant". When your job is to go, literally, elbow deep into a man's ass crack (with only wrist-length gloves available, of course) because he's morbidly obese and can't clean himself properly; or to take bodies of recently deceased cancer patients to Pathology where I was to wait while they did an autopsy; or to help hold down the 65% 3rd-degree burn victim while they debrided him over a period of hours - well, when these are your tasks, some middle aged drama queen screaming about her steak's degree of doneness just kind of slides off.   

[Eddie Coyle]

 
          Spitting in food is gross and tasteless. I wouldn't do it...

           Instead, I'd just put my balls in the food. Unless it was hot soup.


         

[McPhallus]

I had bosses who would even work out beforehand what we would do if things just went all to hell and we got a customer who would not be satisfied until s/he got blood (I found that vicious women could be just as bad as bullying men): we had a little drama worked out, from sham apology all the way up to mock dismissal (we only had to do that once).

Reminds me of my brief (3-weeks, then shitcanned) career as a grocery bagger, during which I met one of those angry-violent middle-aged man types along with his two kids.  When I didn't bag his groceries fast enough, he grabbed his shit, uttered "Jesus fuckin' Christ," then stormed out of the store with his kids in tow.

[Usagi]

You're right, when they place the plate in front of you, they should say "Fuck you.  I hope you choke to death."

Maybe so, but only if they really do hope you choke to death.  Fake rudeness, like at Ed Debevic's in Chicago, is just as cloying and gross as fake pleasantries.

[BobGrau]

Hmm. Y'know, I started taking antidepressants about 3 years ago... looks like they're finally kicking in.

Amusingly, I started taking them largely because I was/am surrounded by miserable, bitter people, and that shit can be infectious.

[McPhallus]

Hmm. Y'know, I started taking antidepressants about 3 years ago... looks like they're finally kicking in.

Amusingly, I started taking them largely because I was/am surrounded by miserable, bitter people, and that shit can be infectious.

Get those people out of your life!  They can hold you back.  If you try to change, they'll try to drag you back down.  And if you become successful and/or happy, they'll be resentful.

[McPhallus]

Maybe so, but only if they really do hope you choke to death.  Fake rudeness, like at Ed Debevic's in Chicago, is just as cloying and gross as fake pleasantries.

I've never been there (although I'm in the general area), but I have to wonder how often they have "incidents" with customers.  You know - the borderline psychotic who goes there and is unaware of the whole concept of the place, then flips out when they start acting rude.

[Falkie2013]

You are revealing yourself to be miserable thoughtless cunt completely wrapped up in yourself and cripplingly unaware of other people's existence in your shitty little lifestory.

I can guarantee you have had your food spat in or worse, if that's the attitude you display in everyday life.


However, I agree with everything else 

I'm very particular about restaurant food. I hate bad service. I was taught about the restaurant and hotel business by my late Father who was a professional chef after he retired from the Army. I don't tell the waiter or waitress about it. I either tell the manager or just don't leave a tip, in any event, we don't go back to the restaurant after that. Of course, now there are ways to express one's good and bad experiences with customer service all over the net. When I DO get good service and good food, I not only tip but DO compliment the waiter or waitress. What makes YOU think I would not do so ? I worked in customer service for over 30 years and hate bad service and stupidity in people who supposedly are in that segment of the industry no matter what their position. It shouldn't be tolerated by far often is.

We do have some favorite restaurants that we go to because not only is the food good, the atmosphere and the attitude of the people who work there is good also.

Going out to eat should be a pleasurable experience and not one that sours the disposition. Is it too much to expect your dinner or lunch to not be burned, undercooked, overcooked or just plain not taste terrible ? Or as in one recent case, a dessert that had gone bad ? I understand that, but there's a lot of bad chefs out there. Don't believe me, just look at some of the Yelp reviews out there.

By the way, my first unpaid job was washing dishes after school in a Mexican restaurant in Reno. He was into flying saucers and we would talk about George Adamski, Donald E. Keyhoe and other people in the field of the day. He died a few years ago but his restaurant is still there, Miquel's.  I would go there after school, do some dishes and help out and get dinner for free while I sat doing my homework.

So I do know what goes on in restaurants not only from that perspective but I have worked in restaurants, kitchens and fast food as a cook and service person.

And I am NOT a grouch, just someone who has an expectation of good food and reasonable service when I'm paying for it.

I suppose YOU just accept either good or bad food and don't say a word about it.