Author Where was your worst public bathroom experience?  (Read 499 times)

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Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« on: April 19, 2017, 02:58:19 PM »
Let's hear it, members and moderators.

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #1 on: April 19, 2017, 03:08:29 PM »
Not the worst experience but one that left me scratching my head.  I went into the restroom at an insurance company and found two empty candy wrappers on one of the urinals.  I wondered if he enjoyed the treats before, during or after a piss.  Was the piss so long as to require sustenance?  Were the treats used to lure someone into an illicit tryst?  I tried to figure out who did it all day to no avail.

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #2 on: April 19, 2017, 03:15:51 PM »
When you conceal carry every public bathroom experience is a bad one. Sometimes you get lucky and they have a baby change table in the handicapped stall you can throw your gun on till your done pushing brown. If not then it's undie tuck time...



Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #3 on: April 19, 2017, 07:07:52 PM »
Does semi-public aka the workplace count or is just limited to rest stops and the like?

The Big Chicken has some tales from his gig that exceed the boundaries of belief.

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #4 on: April 19, 2017, 07:14:05 PM »
Not the worst experience but one that left me scratching my head.  I went into the restroom at an insurance company and found two empty candy wrappers on one of the urinals.  I wondered if he enjoyed the treats before, during or after a piss.  Was the piss so long as to require sustenance?  Were the treats used to lure someone into an illicit tryst?  I tried to figure out who did it all day to no avail.
Were you in Martinez?

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #5 on: April 19, 2017, 07:26:34 PM »

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #6 on: April 19, 2017, 07:28:17 PM »
No, Portsmouth NH.
I was making a Falkie joke since you found candy wrappers in a urinal.

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #7 on: April 19, 2017, 07:30:29 PM »
I got it.  Just providing the facts ma'am.  :P

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #8 on: April 19, 2017, 07:45:50 PM »
Does semi-public aka the workplace count or is just limited to rest stops and the like?

The Big Chicken has some tales from his gig that exceed the boundaries of belief.
Did they involve a wide stance?

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #9 on: April 19, 2017, 07:51:45 PM »
One more.   I worked at a life insurance company in NH.  They moved a new department to our part of the building.  Suddenly one of the toilets would have 3/4 of a roll of toilet paper in and on it and would back up and overflow onto the floor.  This happened for a couple of weeks until a corporate wide memo about bathroom behavior was sent.  Very strange since the company already provided ass gaskets.  I can't imagine the phobia the offender had.

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #10 on: April 19, 2017, 07:59:51 PM »
I got with a girl in a bar restroom once. I sat on the toilet and tried to go poo with her on top of me. Nothing came out but I pulled some muscle in my stomach attempting this risky move

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #11 on: April 19, 2017, 09:46:21 PM »
When you conceal carry every public bathroom experience is a bad one. Sometimes you get lucky and they have a baby change table in the handicapped stall you can throw your gun on till your done pushing brown. If not then it's undie tuck time...



I see your problem young man, by the looks of that nasty stain in your underwear, you've got too much fat in your diet.   That ugly fat will clog you up.  You need some cool fiber in your diet.

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #12 on: April 19, 2017, 09:47:19 PM »
Stick this in your pants and you'll feel much better! :)

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #13 on: April 19, 2017, 10:44:39 PM »
Not the worst experience but one that left me scratching my head.  I went into the restroom at an insurance company and found two empty candy wrappers on one of the urinals.  I wondered if he enjoyed the treats before, during or after a piss.  Was the piss so long as to require sustenance?  Were the treats used to lure someone into an illicit tryst?  I tried to figure out who did it all day to no avail.

Reminds me of the time I saw a guy pissing at a urinal while slowly eating a sandwich and moaning.

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #14 on: April 19, 2017, 10:57:04 PM »
Reminds me of the time I saw a guy pissing at a urinal while slowly eating a sandwich and moaning.
I don't think most of our jobs are that bad but there are some places/bosses where the bathroom or lunch breaks are pretty brutal. The guys, actually often gals (I even was told- smaller hands, work harder, work cheaper, get girls from country so less mouths to feed and they sent $ back home) in places in China where they make your gadgets and phones have awful rules on it. I'm sure we still have some sweatshop stuff here, especially using illegals.

One funny experience at work many years ago. We had a small office but the bathroom was up to code so had several crappers and a small bathroom for women. One of the toilets wasn't functioning right, pressure issue and would run water. Since it was just two of us and a secretary for temporary fix I just shut off one of the toilets in the mens room. And we'd deal with it later. Anyway, we had a bunch of executives flying in from Taiwan and PRC for a meeting with some other companies for a few days. I was going with with back and forth etc. Finally they leave and I got into the bathroom and someone, or more than one, was using the shut-off shitter and it was piled up. AND there was no paper in that stall (since we weren't using it.) After gagging. I then thought: what dirty people who would crap in a non-working toilet and using no paper etc? Then I thought did they leave and say to themselves "what backwards people these gweilos to not even have paper or a working toilet?

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #15 on: April 20, 2017, 12:12:49 AM »
Rest stop restrooms some place in Montana,were the toilet or toilets were so dirty, they were literally covered in shit. I don't know how people do this without working at it. It might have been a state Park, actually.

Not too long ago at the assisted living facility I worked at up until recently, some residents would use the public restrooms instead of going  back to their own apartments, and really messing them up when they had diarrhea and stuff. Even the wall was smeared once. Housekeepers carried  cell phones, and we always  dreaded getting these calls. Since my supervisor had the main line she got more of them.

I understand that the restrooms at the Calgary stampede get pretty crazy. The Missoula County fairgrounds and the MIle High Stadium(where the Denver Broncos play) have some pretty unusual ones, but I was too drunk to remember much about it.

There's a restaurant someplace near Glacier park where I swear the door cleared the seat of the toilet by about a half an inch. Obviously not handicapped accessible, but this was in the early 80s.


I saw something cool in a restroom in a privately run park near Yakima, flowers and a little basket with towels. Somelody puts fresh flowers in the ladies room on WA ferries, too.

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #16 on: April 20, 2017, 12:24:58 AM »
Not the worst experience but one that left me scratching my head.  I went into the restroom at an insurance company and found two empty candy wrappers on one of the urinals.  I wondered if he enjoyed the treats before, during or after a piss.  Was the piss so long as to require sustenance?  Were the treats used to lure someone into an illicit tryst?  I tried to figure out who did it all day to no avail.

Since I worked on a bar, I can tell you some patrons think it's funny to put inappropriate stuff in urinals. Use your imagination. The candy wrappers were probably in his pocket or something.

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #17 on: April 20, 2017, 12:29:06 AM »
Mine wasn't so terrible, mostly because I decided I could hold it for the rest of the ride after all.

I'm on a bus going across the desert in the western (Muslim) part of China.  The bus stops at the only building I've seen since getting on.  It turns out to be a fairly newly constructed restroom, a roundish windowless concrete building.  We hadn't seen a soul in hours, and there was certainly no one else around as the bus pulled up, and nothing else around. 

I walk in and it's one big room, floor, ceiling, and walls, that's it.  And a row of slits on the floor with a bunch of guys (who, reflecting back, more or less look like bin Laden - robes, beards, sandals) hunched over them, each holding a clay jug, and all eyes on me.  Since there wasn't a sink or running water, and I didn't have a clay jug, well, I didn't ask the driver to pull over in the first place..

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #18 on: April 20, 2017, 12:36:25 AM »
Were you in Martinez?

Ibby, it is a game of twenty questions?

...

This simply awful English diplomat had "cornwalled" me at a table in a beer gas=garten, what luck!

Whould/shall I continue with the fable?

...

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #19 on: April 20, 2017, 12:42:25 AM »
I stayed at the fabled Snowland backpacker tourist hotel in Lhasa, right off the Barkhor.  It was a three storied square building - four sides with a courtyard in the middle. 

One of the corners was the ''bathroom''.  One would go up to the top floor and do their business through a hole in the floor.  It would pile up from the ground floor, and when the pile got high enough they'd cart it off and start it over again..  The opposing corner was the kitchen.

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #20 on: April 20, 2017, 12:52:53 AM »
I took a train 58 hours, Beijing to Urumchi.  It stopped at every town along the way.  Turns out, that's a lot of towns.  Once we got out on the desert, it following what was left of the Great Wall, until that petered out.  The last car was the bathroom car.  They'd lock it 15-20 minutes before and after each stop.  Other than the staff, the only other people on the train for the most part were Uigers - Muslims - heading home.  At some point it dawned on me that, unlike the rest of the trip, I wasn't really any worse off than anyone else - no one else spoke or read Chinese either.

The bathroom car.  A full sized train car with nothing but a hole in the middle of the floor.  And again, the car wasn't open when the train was stopped.  No rails, no handholds, no sink or stalls, just a hole in the floor.  There were small steps sticking up a couple inches off the floor for people to walk on from the door to the hole.  They were shaped like the bottoms of feet, probably for dumb tourists to know where to step.  Good thing they were there, slightly above the floor, because with the train swaying and lurching, peoples aim wasn't so good and the whole floor was soaking wet.  Anything that made it through the hole dropped to the tracks.

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #21 on: April 20, 2017, 12:56:35 AM »
These experiences and others like them were a warm up for India.

We may need a thread for worst sleeping arrangements.

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #22 on: April 20, 2017, 01:00:44 AM »
I took a train 58 hours, Beijing to Urumchi.  It stopped at every town along the way.  Once we got out on the desert, it following what was left of the Great Wall, until that petered out.  The last car was the bathroom car.  They'd lock it 15-20 minutes before and after each stop.  Other than the staff, the only other people on the train for the most part were Uigers - Muslims - heading home.  At some point it dawned on me that, unlike the rest of the trip, I wasn't really any worse off than anyone else - no one else spoke or read Chinese either.

The bathroom car.  It was just a hole in the floor.  And again, the car wasn't open when the train was stopped.  No rails, no handholds, no sink or stalls, just a hole in the floor.  There were small steps sticking up a couple inches off the floor for people to walk on from the door to the hole.  They were shaped like the bottoms of feet, probably for dumb tourists to know where to step.  Good thing they were there, slightly above the floor, because with the train swaying and lurching, peoples aim wasn't so good and the whole floor was soaking wet.  Anything that made it through the hole dropped to the tracks.
Some rural France used to have same. And trains in Hungary etc have the openhole thing. In winter, at speed? Ha. Lessons learned? "Babywipes" or bring a roll of tp is always good when travelling, flying, or working. Esp in foreign lands or hiking/hunting/camping. But I bring now even to football games etc. You never know.

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #23 on: April 20, 2017, 01:02:59 AM »
... In winter, at speed? Ha. Lessons learned?...

Mine was:  don't eat the week before boarding

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #24 on: April 20, 2017, 01:06:05 AM »
I took a train 58 hours, Beijing to Urumchi.  It stopped at every town along the way.  Turns out, that's a lot of towns.  Once we got out on the desert, it following what was left of the Great Wall, until that petered out.  The last car was the bathroom car.  They'd lock it 15-20 minutes before and after each stop.  Other than the staff, the only other people on the train for the most part were Uigers - Muslims - heading home.  At some point it dawned on me that, unlike the rest of the trip, I wasn't really any worse off than anyone else - no one else spoke or read Chinese either.

The bathroom car.  A full sized train car with nothing but a hole in the middle of the floor.  And again, the car wasn't open when the train was stopped.  No rails, no handholds, no sink or stalls, just a hole in the floor.  There were small steps sticking up a couple inches off the floor for people to walk on from the door to the hole.  They were shaped like the bottoms of feet, probably for dumb tourists to know where to step.  Good thing they were there, slightly above the floor, because with the train swaying and lurching, peoples aim wasn't so good and the whole floor was soaking wet.  Anything that made it through the hole dropped to the tracks.

It is times like this when I am glad that I have stayed in the States for the most part outside of a couple trips to the Bahamas and Puerto Vallarta.

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #25 on: April 20, 2017, 01:44:52 AM »
Finally they leave and I got into the bathroom and someone, or more than one, was using the shut-off shitter and it was piled up. AND there was no paper in that stall (since we weren't using it.) After gagging. I then thought: what dirty people who would crap in a non-working toilet and using no paper etc? Then I thought did they leave and say to themselves "what backwards people these gweilos to not even have paper or a working toilet?

When I went to university a certain number of bathrooms had a few of the asian style squat toilets, and there almost always was some kind of visible mess in those stalls. Then in the normal bathrooms they had signs up instructing people how to use western toilets and telling them not to squat on those. Apparently people just ignored the signs, because you'd see footprints on the toilet seat sometimes.



Also not a public bathroom story as such, but I did once upon a time see a pilot pee into a bottle during a long ferry flight. He then opened the storm window (it's a small window in some cockpits which you can barely put your hand through) and attempted to pour it out, only for it to all blow back onto him.


Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #26 on: April 20, 2017, 01:57:38 AM »

Not sure if this was an accident or intentional or a bit of both. Looks like Anarchy to me.

Judging by my electrikal bootz I took this pic (actually 2 pix) some time around 2014.


Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #27 on: April 20, 2017, 02:09:30 AM »
I forgot I had this one too..... I think this one was from Union Station but I can't remember for sure. I opted not to use this urinal and went to another one. Or maybe I used another one then took the pic at this urinal before I left.

Not sure what kind of person does this kind of thing. Notice how they didn't even fucking flush the urinal.

This was taken back when Chuck Berry was still alive. It's quite possible that he passed by this location moments prior to my visitation.




Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #28 on: April 20, 2017, 02:36:03 AM »
Since I worked on a bar, I can tell you some patrons think it's funny to put inappropriate stuff in urinals. Use your imagination. The candy wrappers were probably in his pocket or something.
Between the Calgary stampede and the bar you have sent a ton of memories flooding back. I had not even considered the two, but yeah, the stampede can be pretty brutal.

As for the bar- I once caught a guy doing a line off of a rather dirty toilet seat.  I poked my head into the washroom and noticed somebody with their feet and knees in a rather awkward position (similar to the position of another patrons feet when they were trying to have sex on a toilet, actually...)

Helpful hint #24 for those still young... Pay for a cheap hotel room or use the back seat if you want to impress your date with your class.  Being discovered screwing by a doorman in a stall can be awkward.

Re: Where was your worst public bathroom experience?
« Reply #29 on: April 20, 2017, 02:42:25 AM »
Since I worked on a bar, I can tell you some patrons think it's funny to put inappropriate stuff in urinals. Use your imagination. The candy wrappers were probably in his pocket or something.
The wrappers were not in the urinal.  They were perched on top like a garish Huginn and Muninn.