Anyone know how to build an igloo?

[MagnificentBastard]

 Out behind my house a semi full of box fans jack-knifed on the turnpike and then that sucker rolled right over. It almost hit me too because I was walking down the side of the road after my bicycle got stolen by some kids at the Jiffy Mart while I was at the counter buying a sixer of PBR. I managed to get 32 of those fans before the police rolled up on scene and I want to stack them all up into an igloo around my chair so that my nuts won't sweat so much while I sit here looking at the interweb. It's damn hot where I live since my wading pool busted (the downstairs neighbors pitched a fit and the landlord tried to evict me). Me and my buddy Earl already tried it once, but it fell right down and I was tangled up in it for a good hour while Earl was walking to the Jiffy Mart for some PBR. Every time I'd move, I'd get a hell of a jolt.

I know that maybe none of you have any experience in this, but it's supposed to be darn hot tomorrow, so I'd like to get that igloo up. Any help would be appreciated.

[paladin1991]

First, let's pour ourselves a drink.

[Yorkshire pud]

Out behind my house a semi full of box fans jack-knifed on the turnpike and then that sucker rolled right over. It almost hit me too because I was walking down the side of the road after my bicycle got stolen by some kids at the Jiffy Mart while I was at the counter buying a sixer of PBR. I managed to get 32 of those fans before the police rolled up on scene and I want to stack them all up into an igloo around my chair so that my nuts won't sweat so much while I sit here looking at the interweb. It's damn hot where I live since my wading pool busted (the downstairs neighbors pitched a fit and the landlord tried to evict me). Me and my buddy Earl already tried it once, but it fell right down and I was tangled up in it for a good hour while Earl was walking to the Jiffy Mart for some PBR. Every time I'd move, I'd get a hell of a jolt.

I know that maybe none of you have any experience in this, but it's supposed to be darn hot tomorrow, so I'd like to get that igloo up. Any help would be appreciated.

I slept on this, and have given it much thought. My advice is only given with my limited experience of igloo building okay?


Use Ice.

[BobGrau]

Use Ice.

Also gloves.

[paladin1991]

I slept on this, and have given it much thought. My advice is only given with my limited experience of igloo building okay?


Use Ice.

Well of course.  In the shaker, right?

[Yorkshire pud]

Well of course.  In the shaker, right?

That can be used to take it from the ice tray in the little freezer compartment...might take a few trips though.

[Juan]

Find an Eskimo girlfriend and put her to work.

[eddie dean]

Same thing happened to me, except the truck was carrying cows!

Truck with cows crash in Russia:
http://youtu.be/9V--m0bxOs4

Anybody know how to build a giant BBQ?

[wr250]

Same thing happened to me, except the truck was carrying cows!

Truck with cows crash in Russia:
http://youtu.be/9V--m0bxOs4

Anybody know how to build a giant BBQ?

[MagnificentBastard]

  I'll tell you right now I'm mad! I know I may be new on this messageboard, but that don't give none of you the right to bully me. If you're looking for a sucker that can't throw a hand-smacking then look somewhere else! All I was doing was asking for some help with my box fans. I aint gave anyone any reason to treat me badly. I'm neighboring and hospicable with everyone.

I know that the most of you don't know what I'm talking about. None of you excepting the one that sent me that mail message to my mailbox page here that I can get to if I go back one page, or maybe two pages, and then tap that private message thing. I can't be more than three pages back. But I'll call the police if I get any more mail messages like that. It damn near scared the life straight outta me, getting a mail message telling me my house were on fire. I was outta there in a flash and that aint even because the fire was the worst of the matter. My daddy always told me when I was a baby that when the house sets to burning, to head straight to the roof, lickety split. And I'm scared of heights. I was up there shaking like a rat dog with the shits for over an hour. Man, I was so scared I didn't know what to do. Then I realized my daddy was talking about floods so I jumped off the roof into the blackberry bush because I figured at least it would break the fall. I won't be doing that again. Now I can't figure out what I'm more scared of, heights or blackberry bushes.

   If you send me another mail message like that again, I'll send you one and tell you the president ordered you to fly to where all the terrorists live over there. I think it's in Africa. Or maybe Greece.

[Mind Flayer Monk]

Alright I am calling bullshit on this story.

You expect us to believe you were buying a 6 pack of PBR on Sunday in a dry county?

[West of the Rockies]

I'm thinking Jackstar has resurfaced with an exciting new troll feature.

[Yorkshire pud]

Alright I am calling bullshit on this story.

You expect us to believe you were buying a 6 pack of PBR on Sunday in a dry county?

It's the only flaw in the story too; well spotted M F M!! You should get a pwize.

[DigitalPigSnuggler]

  I'll tell you right now I'm mad!

You remind me of a friend of mine.  He's only got one nut now, poor lil fella.  His former girlfriend told me that when he gets a boner his junk looks kind of like an exclamation point.  He's involved in some clinical trial to try to grow another nut off of his earlobe.  When it's ripe or whatever they'll trim it off and move it down where it's needed.

Anyway, the reason you remind me of my friend is because he's also an ungrateful fucker.  He steals my best schticks and doesn't even give me credit for them.  I do all the work in our relationship, he's kind of like a hanger-on.  But I've made a tidy sum offa him at the Santa Cruz boardwalk showing off the nut growing on his ear, so I guess I can't complain. 

[Yorkshire pud]

You remind me of a friend of mine.  He's only got one nut now, poor lil fella.  His former girlfriend told me that when he gets a boner his junk looks kind of like an exclamation point.  He's involved in some clinical trial to try to grow another nut off of his earlobe.  When it's ripe or whatever they'll trim it off and move it down where it's needed.

Anyway, the reason you remind me of my friend is because he's also an ungrateful fucker.  He steals my best schticks and doesn't even give me credit for them.  I do all the work in our relationship, he's kind of like a hanger-on.  But I've made a tidy sum offa him at the Santa Cruz boardwalk showing off the nut growing on his ear, so I guess I can't complain.

Have you considered taking him on a national tour? A bit like the good old days when bearded ladies and the real spider man who was born with four arms and four legs? The liberal pansies said it was blatant exploitation of the vulnerable of course (Which is why Snake man who had rampant psoriasis was made unemployed), but having a distended earlobe/ scrotum/ testicle has to be a money spinner.

[West of the Rockies]

Does his ear tighten up when he's about to...

Oh, never mind....

[Yorkshire pud]

Does his ear tighten up when he's about to...

Oh, never mind....

....clear his excess wax? 

[Tarbaby]

I think rather than relocate the testicle from the ear when the time comes they should relocate the other testicle to the other Ear. What a fashion statement.
And  why Does this remind me of Robert Blake?

[Robert Ghostwolf's Ghost]

I think rather than relocate the testicle from the ear when the time comes they should relocate the other testicle to the other Ear. What a fashion statement.
And  why Does this remind me of Robert Blake?

Maybe that was the inspiration for Baretta's catch phrase, "That's the name of that tune."

[Robert Ghostwolf's Ghost]

I think I might know your friend, Earl, MB (may I call you Rommel?). It sure sounds like him.  Nice guy who won the lottery several years ago and devoted himself to atoning for all the bad things he'd done to people in the past.  I haven't seen him around for a long time, so I figured he must have moved away.  If that's him, I'm glad he's doing well and got himself that OSHA certification.  The sky's the limit if you have one of those.  Is this him?

[Tarbaby]

Maybe that was the inspiration for Baretta's catch phrase, "That's the name of that tune."

no, it was during the Blakely murder trial when Robert Blake was making a statement he said, "what do  they want now, maybe they want me to wear my testicles for earrings!" Mark"

[scottydawg]

Geez Louise, what a question. 30 years ago in the Air Force way up north we had a survival instructor teach us how to do it.
Never had to use that skill. But years later when my kids were little we had a real rough deep winter. The piles at the end of the driveway were packed and deep. I hauled out a small pruning saw and a shovel. In about an hour the kids had a nice igloo to play in. Then their friends saw it and wanted on in their yard. I ended up making 8 igloos on the block!

[Kelt]

Out behind my house a semi full of box fans jack-knifed on the turnpike and then that sucker rolled right over. It almost hit me too because I was walking down the side of the road after my bicycle got stolen by some kids at the Jiffy Mart while I was at the counter buying a sixer of PBR. I managed to get 32 of those fans before the police rolled up on scene and I want to stack them all up into an igloo around my chair so that my nuts won't sweat so much while I sit here looking at the interweb. It's damn hot where I live since my wading pool busted (the downstairs neighbors pitched a fit and the landlord tried to evict me). Me and my buddy Earl already tried it once, but it fell right down and I was tangled up in it for a good hour while Earl was walking to the Jiffy Mart for some PBR. Every time I'd move, I'd get a hell of a jolt.

I know that maybe none of you have any experience in this, but it's supposed to be darn hot tomorrow, so I'd like to get that igloo up. Any help would be appreciated.

I believe snow is involved.

[Yorkshire pud]

I believe snow is involved.

Ummmm.. We went through ice, and ended at distended testicles/earlobes; Snow is just so obvious.

[Robert Ghostwolf's Ghost]

no, it was during the Blakely murder trial when Robert Blake was making a statement he said, "what do  they want now, maybe they want me to wear my testicles for earrings!" Mark"

What the hell crime would that punishment fit?  I'll never understand our legal system.

[Kelt]

Ummmm.. We went through ice, and ended at distended testicles/earlobes; Snow is just so obvious.

I can only offer snow as a suggestion... I don't know how distended testicles might factor in as igloo construction material. I'd have to read through the thread.

You might also need a stout shovel of sorts.

[Yorkshire pud]

I can only offer snow as a suggestion... I don't know how distended testicles might factor in as igloo construction material. I'd have to read through the thread.

You might also need a stout shovel of sorts.

The roads, I mean the stout shovel goes without saying.