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George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

Started by MV/Liberace!, April 06, 2008, 01:23:02 AM

Can Noory pronounce anything correctly?

No
No
Uh oh.

George has got an authentic academic on tonight -- a PhD Scholar-in-Residence at Duke University. 

She's attractive, too.  George read the table of contents of her book, and he's ready to go.  He'll adjust his toupee -- even though she can't see him -- and rev up the abiotic oily charm that works so well on all the sans uteri and menopausal ladies at his "paranormal events."

And this woman's gonna talk about animal sex.

We're in for 2 hours of unintentional comedy gold with all the usual Noory mental pratfalls and goofy conduct.  Hot damn!

When it's all over, our guest will think she's been interviewed by a drunken shoe salesman.

This extended skit will be followed by two hours of "Open Lines," consisting mostly of Bible-beating southern Shi'ite Baptists and philosophical truckers with exactly one revelation:  the world is about to end because the vapor trails in the sky told them so.


Quote from: Major Ed Damien on November 21, 2014, 03:28:42 PM
Uh oh.

George has got an authentic academic on tonight -- a PhD Scholar-in-Residence at Duke University. 

She's attractive, too.  George read the table of contents of her book, and he's ready to go.  He'll adjust his toupee -- even though she can't see him -- and rev up the abiotic oily charm that works so well on all the sans uteri and menopausal ladies at his "paranormal events."

And this woman's gonna talk about animal sex.


She's going to have to do it in interpretive dance because George has banned most words relating to sexual reproduction and bodily functions.

smitty9999

http://www.jenniferverdolin.com/#!media/ciw8


Interviews
Radio
Coast to Coast AM with Geory Noory  11/21/2014

bateman

Quote from: Major Ed Damien on November 21, 2014, 03:28:42 PM
Uh oh.

George has got an authentic academic on tonight -- a PhD Scholar-in-Residence at Duke University. 

She's attractive, too.  George read the table of contents of her book, and he's ready to go.  He'll adjust his toupee -- even though she can't see him -- and rev up the abiotic oily charm that works so well on all the sans uteri and menopausal ladies at his "paranormal events."

And this woman's gonna talk about animal sex.

We're in for 2 hours of unintentional comedy gold with all the usual Noory mental pratfalls and goofy conduct.  Hot damn!

When it's all over, our guest will think she's been interviewed by a drunken shoe salesman.

This extended skit will be followed by two hours of "Open Lines," consisting mostly of Bible-beating southern Shi'ite Baptists and philosophical truckers with exactly one revelation:  the world is about to end because the vapor trails in the sky told them so.

This entire post is gold.

Quote from: Georgie For President 2216 on November 21, 2014, 03:56:09 PM
She's going to have to do it in interpretive dance because George has banned most words relating to sexual reproduction and bodily functions.

Yeah, what's up with that weird quirk of his that shuts down anything remotely sexual?  He'll always quickly dismiss whatever was said and then launch into a fresh non sequitur.  A guy like that could have any number of personal sexual peccadilloes   Maybe his pecker is a dildo.  There's just no telling.

Hard to believe he even allowed this guest to be booked, but her looks may have trumped his blue nose/blue balls.

Quote from: Major Ed Damien on November 21, 2014, 04:57:50 PM
Yeah, what's up with that weird quirk of his that shuts down anything remotely sexual?  He'll always quickly dismiss whatever was said and then launch into a fresh non sequitur.  A guy like that could have any number of personal sexual peccadilloes   Maybe his pecker is a dildo.  There's just no telling.

Anyone who's pecker was a dildo would have a far more interesting show.


albrecht

Bad strollers+made in china=mean babies+Jerome Corsi (with some delta symbol for heat that i cant do on cell phone.)

zeebo

Boy that Harold Bloom bit sure was off-the-wall.  George didn't help things by adding "The point is, the world is in chaos, and it's not getting any better."

Juan Cena

Quote from: Morgus on November 21, 2014, 02:16:21 AM
Noory isn't doing his annual JFK roundtable show this year since the anniversary is on Saturday, so one of the guest hosts is doing that instead.
So Noory has Linda Howe tonight interviewing Jim Marrs for a segment on the JFK conspiracy instead?

The sad part is that 30 minutes of LMH with Jim Marrs was probably more listenable than 3 hours of Marrs with Snorge.

Nick el Ass

So George gets the conversation started by asking about why monkeys rip people's faces off, and then goes to commercial with a song about space. Wtf, do they even put any thought into the bumper music at all?

George has already gotten off two creepy laughs and a question about chimps ripping human faces off. 

He's in the zone.


Nick el Ass

My guess is that they won't be playing any Marvin Gaye when discussing the courtship rituals of animals vs. humans which is what she wrote about... Instead George will stick to asking tough questions like whatever happened to Michael Jackson's pet monkey Bubbles, and if any other animals like to attack their owners.


Marvin Gaye Lets Get It On

This is a conversation between a highly-trained female biologist and a child.

zeebo

This guest wants to talk about birds and monkeys.  George just wants to talk about his love life. 

If the biologist saw George's toupee, she would wonder what animal it was.

Juan Cena

Quote from: Nick el Ass on November 22, 2014, 12:36:26 AM
So George gets the conversation started by asking about why monkeys rip people's faces off, and then goes to commercial with a song about space. Wtf, do they even put any thought into the bumper music at all?


I suppose you were hoping for "Bungle in the Jungle" or Bloodhound Gang's "The Bad Touch?"


Maybe Nine Inch Nails' "Closer?"

George just told this woman he can appreciate "a woman with a great personality over one that may look better."

What a fuckin' charmer.

pate

iGnoory just said something about how he 'bred hamsters' as a youngster...

Hmm...  that sounds a little bit weird, especially since the subject was about animal sex...

Juan Cena

Quote from: Major Ed Damien on November 22, 2014, 12:44:30 AM
This is a conversation between a highly-trained female biologist and a child.


I'm pretty sure a child's questions about animal mating habits would be far more intelligent and enlightened than Snorge's.

Nick el Ass

Quote from: Juan Cena on November 22, 2014, 12:47:48 AM

I suppose you were hoping for "Bungle in the Jungle" or Bloodhound Gang's "The Bad Touch?"


Maybe Nine Inch Nails' "Closer?"


That would be great, but momma Noory would have a heart attack with a song like Closer playing.

"I shot off rockets . . . I raised hamsters."

He left off the hamsters he shot off on rockets.



Juan Cena

Quote from: Major Ed Damien on November 22, 2014, 12:52:47 AM
"I shot off rockets . . . I raised hamsters."

He left off the hamsters he shot off on rockets.


I think the statute of limitations hasn't ended yet for that kind of confession.

Juan Cena

Quote from: Nick el Ass on November 22, 2014, 12:52:34 AM

That would be great, but momma Noory would have a heart attack with a song like Closer playing.


Or worse - She could start singing along with it.

pate

George Noory:  Hamster Wrangler.

Sounds like a great idea for another TeeVee shoe!

GNS

Nick el Ass

Quote from: Major Ed Damien on November 22, 2014, 12:52:47 AM
"I shot off rockets . . . I raised hamsters."

He left off the hamsters he shot off on rockets.


The hamsters were used for a far darker purpose.




George:  "People here in L.A. will often use gerbils for strange purposes.  Let me ask you this:  Do the gerbils get annoyed by what they're made to do in these situations?"

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