Author Topic: The WOTR (self appointed life coach) advice thread.  (Read 1154 times)

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Re: The WOTR (self appointed life coach) advice thread.
« Reply #90 on: July 08, 2019, 10:38:17 PM »
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Re: The WOTR appreciation thread
« Reply #91 on: July 09, 2019, 12:24:03 AM »
But seriously though... you expected to get commiseration after posting about being mistreated by an interviewer on Bellgab. You got a perspective from a member that does that as a living and you went totally apeshit on him. He mentioned transference as to what you are doing to him now. Let us take a moment to see what that means:
Thanks Roswells. Interviewing is (fortunately) a very small piece of my job. I appreciate your helping with the life coaching duties. I have had chose to ignore this case for the last few days due to an disappointing lack of progress...

It was interesting to read the posts- and I believe I actually did gain quite a lot of insight (I won't post most of it here for fear of causing a minor offense again and damaging the therapist / client relationship.) I will agree that it could be transference- it could also be an insatiable need to be a victim. A victim of the interviewer first and now a victim of the evil "bully of Bellgab." I suppose sometimes you don't even need to be a victim to be a victim...

Thank you for the invitation.  I like your stamina. 
I guess the thing that bothers me the worst, the absolute worst, is that for all she knows, I or someone near me might have actually had died or nearly died which may have caused me to be late, and this makes her tirade a potential indignation toward the plausible victim. 

But you were not. Yes, she should not have done what she did- and it sounds like she was a bitch. But she has probably not ever thought about you again, and here you are a year later. You were correct- you do need to release the toxic resentment...

Re: The WOTR (self appointed life coach) advice thread.
« Reply #92 on: July 09, 2019, 01:19:19 AM »
My new ad pop-ups, dang you:
 
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I almost died laughing. I consider this success.  ;D


Re: The WOTR (self appointed life coach) advice thread.
« Reply #93 on: July 09, 2019, 04:05:39 PM »
I will remember Paris, as it fell to the invaders.



Re: The WOTR appreciation thread
« Reply #94 on: July 10, 2019, 04:04:22 AM »
Thanks Roswells. Interviewing is (fortunately) a very small piece of my job. I appreciate your helping with the life coaching duties. I have had chose to ignore this case for the last few days due to an disappointing lack of progress...

It was interesting to read the posts- and I believe I actually did gain quite a lot of insight (I won't post most of it here for fear of causing a minor offense again and damaging the therapist / client relationship.) I will agree that it could be transference- it could also be an insatiable need to be a victim. A victim of the interviewer first and now a victim of the evil "bully of Bellgab." I suppose sometimes you don't even need to be a victim to be a victim...

But you were not. Yes, she should not have done what she did- and it sounds like she was a bitch. But she has probably not ever thought about you again, and here you are a year later. You were correct- you do need to release the toxic resentment...
She was mean.  Of course it stayed with me.  I was perfectly civil, so of course she did not brood about me.  At least Metron knows when he's being an ass.

Re: The WOTR appreciation thread
« Reply #95 on: July 10, 2019, 04:04:37 AM »
Thanks Roswells. Interviewing is (fortunately) a very small piece of my job. I appreciate your helping with the life coaching duties. I have had chose to ignore this case for the last few days due to an disappointing lack of progress...

It was interesting to read the posts- and I believe I actually did gain quite a lot of insight (I won't post most of it here for fear of causing a minor offense again and damaging the therapist / client relationship.) I will agree that it could be transference- it could also be an insatiable need to be a victim. A victim of the interviewer first and now a victim of the evil "bully of Bellgab." I suppose sometimes you don't even need to be a victim to be a victim...

But you were not. Yes, she should not have done what she did- and it sounds like she was a bitch. But she has probably not ever thought about you again, and here you are a year later. You were correct- you do need to release the toxic resentment...
She was mean.  Of course it stayed with me.  I was perfectly civil, so of course she did not brood about me.  At least Metron knows when he's being an ass.

Re: The WOTR appreciation thread
« Reply #96 on: July 11, 2019, 05:39:46 AM »
That is funny.  have an aunt who is a complete germaphobe freak -- travels with rubber gloves and lysol and cleans the hotel bathroom or guest room first thing no matter how late -- and talks about it constantly, but has no problem at my house or certain friends and relations.  And I am far from scrupulous.  I couldn't figure it out for the longest time until I realized it has nothing whatever to do with germs and is instead a sort of passive-aggressive in-group and out-group tribal-identifier ritual thing she's got going on.  I kind of suspect the same thing here.
I had forgotten all about the bag technique.  Thank you very much for the reminder. 

I am a care giver, so as you can imagine, I am prepared to clean up any type or combination of body waste from any place, on, in or off a body.  I also take care of and sleep with a cat, so there are plenty of germs around me.

But I don't like living with someone who doesn't wash her hands.  She gets sick from not washing her hands before she eats.  She went an entire year with uncontrollable diarrhea  that doctors couldn't fix.  If I ignore her stink and go about my business casually, it ends up on everything I touch, and then the odor transfers to even my steering wheel, purse straps, and the comforter around my neck while I sleep.  Have you ever had little boys that play outside and but only bathe once a week?  That's what the things she touches smell like.  She digs in the garden, handles rotten food and compost and then just rinses off.  If I didn't provide laundry soap, she wouldn't use any.  Germs or no germs, I simply don't like her odor on me or my supplies or car. 

If she had a boyfriend, I know she would clean herself properly.  If she is meeting people (other than me or family), she cleans up.

You know, I've had to be pretty scrappy to survive since my economy crashed in 2007.  I have the fortitude to go through pretty gross items for salvage if I need to.  But I do it safely.  Anyhow, if I say something is grungy, you can take my word for it.

I was casual when I first moved in a year ago.  But after getting diarrhea twice with no apparent cause, I've been much happier being more careful.  I would love to have cans of Lysol - it's the fastest, easiest way to clean and disinfect.  It's on the wish list.

Re: The WOTR appreciation thread
« Reply #97 on: July 15, 2019, 12:09:26 PM »
If she had a boyfriend, I know she would clean herself properly.  If she is meeting people (other than me or family), she cleans up.



Re: The WOTR appreciation thread
« Reply #98 on: July 16, 2019, 01:24:44 PM »


What does that statement mean at the bottom?  That's what I thought. 

Re: The WOTR (self appointed life coach) advice thread.
« Reply #99 on: July 16, 2019, 01:55:47 PM »