Author Topic: Azzerae's Thread  (Read 3833 times)

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Re: Azraa's Thread
« Reply #120 on: July 02, 2019, 09:05:02 AM »


THE TETRAGRAMMATON

One of the most important aspects of the Occult is that of The Tetragrammaton. The Tetragrammaton is a Greek word meaning 'the four lettered name' and represents the four lettered name of god; the four Hebrew letters Yod, Heh, Vav, Heh, which transliterates into YHVH, or IHVH in Latin. Mispronunciations of The Tetragrammaton is where the name Jehovah, YahWeh, and YahVeh derive from. As all four letters are consonants, the true name of god is unpronounceable. Because the name is unpronounceable, inherently many derivations of a pronunciation exist which the magician/Kabbalist can invoke in the work he performs. The quote of "Man Made In The Image Of God" also pertains to The Tetragrammaton as when all 4 Hebrew letters are written in an up-and-down orientation the word itself creates the form of a human being.

The illustration above was drawn by the Nineteenth century magician Eliphas Levi, who is most famous for his book Transcendental Magic and his depiction of the Baphomet, Sabbatic Goat or Goat Of Mendes, more on the subject of which can be read below. The Tetragrammaton in this representation is drawn as a Pentagram, which is one of the most important and misunderstand elements in the Occult. The Pentagram has 5 points, each of these points represents one of the 5 elements in nature: Earth, Air, Fire, Water and the topmost center point represents Ether, or Spirit; all 5 elements of god and nature. Within the Pentagram itself contains the graphical representations of all 7 "planets" and Alchemical elements: The Moon (Silver), The Sun (Gold), Jupiter (Tin), Saturn (Lead), Mars (Iron), Venus (Copper) and Mercury (Mercury or Quicksilver, the most sublime of all elements). With the 'eyes of god' in the center, thus this graphical representation of the The Tetragrammaton is an all encompassing depiction of god, nature and the Occult.

Different permutations of the Name also exist with each permutation invoking different magickal elements. These permutations are what the esoteric symbols within Antichrist Svperstar represent, which are the permutations of IHVH into : HIHV, HVIH and VHHI. The graphical depictions of which are relatively new within the occult and are outline in Donald Tyson's book The Tetragrammaton, which Manson himself referenced as an influence in his autobiography. The 3 symbols in Antichrist Svperstar are derived from the use of a key known as The Tetragram, a diamond or two dimensional representation of a tetrahedron, with one of the four letters of the name IVHV at each corner. By drawing a line by tracing the edges and lines of the Tetragram to form a graphical permutation of The Tetragrammaton a Sigil, or a graphical line representation of a name, is made. Any name or word can be made into a Sigil in the occult and for each name or word a different diagram is used to create it. Creating a Sigil of 'Manson' or 'Lustmorder' for example, a base diagram containing and representation of those names must be used. This is also often done using what are known as Magic Squares, which are squares made up of square segments, each containing a number and the sum of the numbers in each line is equal to the sum of every other line within the square.



There are 12 graphical representations of The Tetragrammaton, IHVH, yet there are in actually 24 distinct and different permutations because of the two H's in the name, and this therefore doubles the number of permutations if you view the two H's as separate and different letters. So the number of permutations double since in each permutation the position of either of the H's can potentially be in one or the other position. As Tyson outlines in his book, in the permutation HVIH (using a bold face to differentiate H's as two separate letters) can be represent as either HVIV or HVIH. So given this difference in each permutation, each Sigil can dually represent a power which either invokes or banishes a specifically assigned angel, which is outlined as seen below:



INVOKING

XX

ANGEL: Vabashiah (VBSh+IH)
Pronounced: Va-bash' -i-ah
BANNER: HIHV
POLARITY: Moon
TYPE: Severity
SIDE: Left
SEX: Female
ELEMENT: Earth
QUALITY: Cardinal
SIGN: Capricorn
HOUSE: Tenth
DIRECTION: North-northwest
STONE: Chrysolite (yellow-green)
TRIBE: Asher
APOSTLE: John
ENOCHIAN GOD NAME: ORO
ENOCHIAN SENIOR: Aaozaif

APPEARANCE: Angular body of average height, thin but muscular. Very narrow hips and small breasts. A large head that tapers to a narrow chin. Dark-brown eyes; dark skin; short, coarse, straight brown hair; thin, colorless lips, small teeth of poor quality. She tends to glower and frown.

NATURE: Repressed, narrow-minded, exacting, unforgiving of faults in herself and others, severe in judgment, hidebound, punctilious, selfish, pessimistic, worrying, analytical, critical, unsympathetic. She tends to scold others for their faults.

FUNCTION: Finds faults or leaks in systems. Reveals mistakes or shortcomings in personality, particularly where these affect professional status. Makes known the weaknesses of competitors or rivals. Warns of business failure or stock collapse. Turns the weaknesses of others against them. Punishes disloyalty or betrayal.

XIX

ANGEL: Shabuel (ShBV+AL)
Pronounced: Sha-bu' -el
BANNER: HIHV
POLARITY: Sun
TYPE: Mercy
SIDE: Right
SEX: Male
ELEMENT: Earth
QUALITY: Cardinal
SIGN: Capricorn
HOUSE: Tenth
DIRECTION: North-northwest
STONE: Chrysolity (yellow-green)
TRIBE: Asher
APOSTLE: John
ENOCHIAN GOD NAME: ORO
ENOCHIAN SENIOR: Habioro

APPEARANCE: Body frame of average height; knotted muscles, angular, large head; prominent ears; large forehead over small, dark-brown eyes; crooked nose; small mouth; bad teeth; weak, bearded chin; sallow complexion with moles or pockmarks. An intense but evasive glance.

NATURE: Serious, determined, enduring, calculating, emotions held under tight control, rational, exacting, very ambitious, highly disciplined, responsible. His serious and rational approach to things makes him seem dull and pedantic. A subdued voice, harsh when raised in anger.

FUNCTION: Matters of personal ambition regarding business or professional career, governmental job, rank, professional standing or awards, credentials, degrees, titles. Climbing the corporate ladder, overcoming obstacles to ambitions, gaining responsibility and trust of superiors.



X

ANGEL: Vamediah (VMD+IH)
Pronounced: Va-med' -i-ah
BANNER: HVIH
POLARITY: Moon
TYPE: Severity
SIDE: Left
SEX: Female
ELEMENT: Water
QUALITY: Mutable
SIGN: Pisces
HOUSE: Twelfth
DIRECTION: North-northeast
STONE: Sapphire (blue)
TRIBE: Issachar
APOSTLE: Bartholomew
ENOCHIAN GOD NAME: TEAA
ENOCHIAN SENIOR: Aapdoce
 
APPEARANCE: Thin limbs; a long, thin neck; small head with short, straight hair, very glossy and of a dark-brown color. Small nose and ears; dark blue eyes surrounded by blue shadows under the skin; poor posture; very thin hands held limp at the wrists; a small, pale mouth and weak chin. Small breasts, narrow hips.

NATURE: Unsure and vacillating, hesitant, touchy about criticism, confused, extravagant, emotional. Tends to be secretive and likes to place burdens upon others shoulders. Outwardly submissive but inwardly resentful. She cares jealously for those she loves and tends to smother them with attention.

FUNCTION: Protecting a loved one, particularly from self-destructive behavior. Watching over animals. Creating works of art of a fantastic or dreamlike type. She aids in the expression of psychic communications such as automatic writing. Enforces service and self-sacrifice upon those who would flee from their responsibilities.

IX

ANGEL: Demuel (DMV+AL)
Pronounced: Dem' -u-el
BANNER: HVIH
POLARITY: Sun
TYPE: Mercy
SIDE: Right
SEX: Male
ELEMENT: Water
QUALITY: Mutable
SIGN: Pisces
HOUSE: Twelfth
DIRECTION: North-northeast
STONE: Sapphire (blue)
TRIBE: Issachar
APOSTLE: Bartholomew
ENOCHIAN GOD NAME: TEAA
ENOCHIAN SENIOR: Alndvod

APPEARANCE: Soft, overweight figure of below average height; wavy, dark-brown hair on a round skull; pale complexion with a tendency to perspire; small nose and small ears that lie flat; very dark blue eyes; heavy eyelids and dark, arched eyebrows; a sensual mouth with a full bottom lip and a weak chin.

NATURE: Intuitive and aware of subtle emotional currents, psychic, creative in the lyrical arts such as poetry and music, highly impressionable, easily expresses feelings, very sympathetic to others. This angel is the happiest near the seashore. Smiles but rarely laughs.

FUNCTION: Songwriting, music, the dramatic arts, matters of faith or belief. Achieving empathy with others. Protection of seamen or those who travel by sea. Attaining purity. Caring for the sick. Protecting and caring for animals. Encouraging pleasant dreams.



XVI

ANGEL: Hiviah (HIH+IV
Pronounced: Hi-vi' -ah
BANNER: VHHI
POLARITY: Moon
TYPE: Severity
SIDE: Left
SEX: Female
ELEMENT: Air
QUALITY: Mutable
SIGN: Gemini
HOUSE: Third
DIRECTION: East-southeast
STONE: Agate (clouded)
TRIBE: Naphtali
APOSTLE: Thomas
ENOCHIAN GOD NAME: ARSL
ENOCHIAN SENIOR: Slgaiol
 
APPEARANCE: Slight slender, but active, with short, curling brown hair on a small skull; prominent pink ears; alert and intelligent golden eyes under arched brows; a long, upturned nose set in a triangular face with a tapered chin; a wide, smiling mouth. Her face is constantly in motion, expressing her feelings, and her hands dance about when she speaks.

NATURE:Full of nervous energy, changes opinions abruptly, clever in a cunning was observant and perceptive about the thoughts and feelings of others, superficial, lazy, flirtatious and fickle in her affections, emotionally detached, lies easily - not out of malice, but to avoid trouble.

FUNCTION: Exposes betrayal of trust, false relationships, adulteries, deceit, intrigue in the work place, scandals, gossip, slanders, libels. Testing friendships and love relationships. She is the angel of lies.

XV

ANGEL: Vihael (VIH+AL)
Pronounced: Vi-ha' -el
BANNER: VHHI
POLARITY: Sun
TYPE: Mercy
SIDE: Right
SEX: Male
ELEMENT: Air
QUALITY: Mutable
SIGN: Gemini
HOUSE: Third
DIRECTION: East-southeast
STONE: Agate (clouded)
TRIBE: Naphtali
APOSTLE: Thomas
ENOCHIAN GOD NAME: ARSL
ENOCHIAN SENIOR: Laoaxrp
 
APPEARANCE: Thin frame with large chest; very mobile hands with long fingers; a flexible face; wide mouth capable of many expressions; large nose; large, prominent ears; high cheekbones; golden eyes; long chin; tanned complexion; light brown, curling hair.

NATURE: Animated, expressive, restless, talkative, always seeking something to do or somewhere to go, witty with a good sense of humor, always seeing the lighter side in every situation, clever with his hands, adaptable, versatile. Detests hard work. Bright, cheerful laughter. His voice is agreeable, but he tends to chatter about nothing.

FUNCTION: Diplomacy, arbitration, brokering deals, managing artistic talent or property, arranging travel, teaching, publishing, legal arguments, creative writing, news reporting, publicity, media events.

Isolation is an Oxygen Mask
« Reply #121 on: July 02, 2019, 09:14:09 AM »
Some have looked deeper, kept looking, there was much more.

So many things, inconsequential things have distracted us from the sad truth.

This is reentry, this is reentry.

I remember when I was only an exit.

Some who haven't experienced
and would not
know
are sentenced.

It doesn't make you stronger. You can't feel someone else's pain.

Who is better, what does it prove? I am an entry...

I know how to
make my statements
in time, in
images.

But I am a dead star.

I am pointing to you ...

... don't ...

miss what I am telling you.

The numbness will wear off.

Humanity is the worse thing to feel.


110/37/109 10:41:64 VW

Re: Azraa's Thread
« Reply #122 on: July 02, 2019, 11:14:17 AM »
In the family I grew up in, we never disturbed someone who was sleeping unless it was truly urgent that they wake up.  Sleep was considered sacred.

That sounds gorgeous a concept - I wish I'd lived within that context. I was awoken many times, rudely, and of course by the dreaded alarm clock, pulling me from bed into the agony of another day.

The brain and body do so much restoration while we sleep.

Totally. I used to fear night time - and sleep - as a kid. I was tremendously anxious about getting into bed at night, and just felt uneasy with the idea of everyone being "out", not in a conscious state.

As I grew up, and became an adult, of course I grew to love bed. And sleep was a form of the sweetest escapism, like being dead for a while. The only other time I ever felt that level of anxiousness I experienced as a child around sleep, was when I began listening to Coast (Whitley Strieber and alien abduction in particular). I felt as if something was approaching me, and was frightened still. Whatever it was was completely invisible, and had no form. But it was something, I'm almost sure of it.

When I was even younger, and had met a friend in college who was evil to the core, this person introduced me to Satanism, got me to do a ritual. The night following that ritual, I had the worst case of sleep paralysis and most oppressive case of suffocation. It felt as if I was sealed in a giant Ziploc bag. I saw a jet black entity which shifted its form, hovering above me. The years that followed this experience were full of drug and alcohol abuse, the wrong company, as well as some of the best, most original artwork I've ever produced to date. I think that's when my depression first began growing.

I feel sorry for millenials - I saw them out late with their parents getting groceries.  I knew a lot of them had to be at daycare long before school or breakfast.  That only left about 5 hours sleep for them.  It was just wrong.

Many a truth said in jest! While I suspect Miss Field was being tongue in cheek, Millenials certainly are exhausted most of (if not all) the time. I remember reading this article by Hannah Ewans, on VICE, and finding it equal parts funny and concerning. The Millenials truly are a generation caught between a rock and a hard place ... left with the issues the Boomers created, and not quite in reach of the opportunities Generation Z enjoy.

Dispiriting, so I feel I must offer some hope ... It was Bertrand Russell who said: "Those who live nobly, even if in their life they live obscurely, need not fear that they will have lived in vain. Something radiates from their lives, some light that shows the way to their friends, their neighbours, perhaps to long future ages."


Re: Azraa's Thread
« Reply #123 on: July 03, 2019, 02:25:14 PM »
JUST SAY NO TO FAMILY VALUES

On a day when
you're walking
down the street
and you see
a hearse
with a coffin,
followed by
a flower car
and limos,
you know the day
is auspicious,
your plans are going to be
successful;
but on a day when
you see a bride and groom
and wedding party,
watch out,
be careful,
it might be a bad sign.
Just say no
to family values,
and don't quit
your day job.

Drugs
are sacred
substances,
and some drugs
are very sacred substances,
please praise them
for somewhat liberating
the mind.

Tobacco
is a sacred substance
to some,
and even though you've
stopped smoking,
show a little respect.

Alcohol
is totally great,
let us celebrate
the glorious qualities
of booze,
and I had
a good time
being with you.

Just
do it,
just don't
not do it,
just do it.

Christian
fundamentalists,
and fundamentalists
in general,
are viruses,
and they're killing us,
multiplying
and mutating,
and they destroying us,
now, you know,
you got to give
strong medicine
to combat
a virus.

Who's buying?
good acid,
I'm flying,
slipping
and sliding,
slurping
and slamming,
I'm sinking,
dipping
and dripping,
and squirting
inside you;
never
fast forward
a come shot;
milk, milk,
lemonade,
round the corner
where the chocolate's made;
I love to see
your face
when you're suffering.

Do it
with anybody
you want,
whatever
you want,
for as long as you want,
any place,
any place,
when it's possible,
and try to be
safe;
in a situation where
you must abandon
yourself
completely
beyond all concepts.

Twat throat
and cigarette dew,
that floor
would ruin
a sponge mop,
she's the queen
of great bliss;
light
in your heart,
flowing up
a crystal channel
into your eyes
and out
hooking
the world
with compassion.

Just
say
no
to family
values.

We don't have to say No
to family values,
cause we never
think about them;
just
do it,
just make
love
and compassion


- John Giorno


Re: Azraa's Thread
« Reply #124 on: July 04, 2019, 08:22:28 AM »
This is after the age of horus, a dystopia.
We can overcome the entire world
Or we can die in our minds.
I feel like I've died enough for all of us.
Let us begin the end.


04-07-2019, 20:20:55

Re: Azraaís Thread
« Reply #125 on: July 04, 2019, 11:08:56 AM »

WE'RE ALREADY DEAD

I love to let you see through my brain
little zapruders
rewinding and replaying.
I love to let you shoot through my brain,
and what are we really selling?
and what are we really buying?
I'm on my way
you are too
I'll see you when we get there.

god is nowhere
god is now here


04-07-2019, 23:05:02

Re: Azraaís Thread
« Reply #126 on: July 04, 2019, 02:36:40 PM »
Re: End Times

Itís back.
Itís watching.
Itís ready.

Their country is falling apart - just in time for the Other to take charge.
Omega rising.
The Other will destroy everyone in their path.

Hate and Iím not,
AZRAA

Independence Day
Things you might find:
The Last Day On Earth
DRUGS
2 naked black women
Live suicide

While I wrote this was I dreaming?

Hate and Iím not,
A773RA3
Jakarta, S.A. Centre of Manís Evil


05-07-2019 02:35:59

Re: Azraa's Thread
« Reply #127 on: July 05, 2019, 07:31:03 AM »
Quote from: Sixteen
You said what your bias led you to say.  Bias can be a form of dishonesty.  As for your other posts, I don't always see them.  After having been exasperated with gruesome images, I put your posts on ignore.  I reveal them when I want to, or I see them when they are quoted.

Quote from: AZRAA
Seeing as though you're big on facts, here's one for you if you care to read it: I stopped posting images of that nature after you requested I stop.

Even if that's the case, what does it change?

Here's what it changes: I was under the impression we made up, and after I promised to ease up on posting things that were getting to you, that we would attempt to be friendlier with one another ...

Quote from: Sixteen
I see where you're coming from.  It takes many interactions with a person to see how they are, so friendships develop ...

And now you hit me with this (?) below:

Quote from: Sixteen
And, it might not be the case.  Let me finish by listing the times I balked or expressed offense.  A person should not have to "request" that you stop offensive behavior.  Expressing offense IS the request.  I expressed offense LONG before I asked you directly to stop.  You have worn me out.  I have little left in this regard.  Granted, the examples below might not be perfect.  And several of them are probably passive aggressive or mere hints or strong suggestions.  But just due to the sheer number of the it is obvious that I did express my feelings about your posts and you chose to disregard my feelings for a substantial time.  It's water under the bridge now, but don't go getting a big head about how long it took you to reconsider posting gore and descriptions of it.  And I'll never say thank you for stopping because it was indecent to start in the first place.  Here is the list:


My post to you.  June 22, 2019, 08:42:54 AM
Isn't there enough pain and hardship in life, without dwelling on it?  In other words, isn't it more rewarding to focus on life's pleasant aspects?  I understand animals are killed for food, but staging carcasses for salacious and often sadistic prurience is desecration...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


My post to you regarding your post on June 18, 2019, 10:13:20 AM

"...Azzy, I really don't have much to say anymore."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



My post to you regarding your post on June 09, 2019, 02:41:14 AM

"Oh puh-lease, no need for expertise here.  Less IS more! (Topic was wrist cutting strategy)."
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


My post to you regarding your post on June 05, 2019, 02:18:05 AM

"C'mon.  Women don't talk like that.  You don't have breasts, do you!"
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


ę on: June 07, 2019, 11:43:04 AM Ľ
My post to you regarding your cuss word on June 06, 2019, 11:57:40 AM
"WTF."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


My post to you regarding your post on May 23, 2019, 12:37:21 PM
"Don't some people deserve it [disingenuity]?  I have to "shine" some people on fakely, because they won't listen to reason yet I still have to have a rapport with them if home and work is to run smoothly without too much drama."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


My post on May 20, 2019, 10:43:32 PM
"What kind of place is this.  JS defending the prevalence of animal abusers.  Azz acting like he is one.  I thought swishypants was bad."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


My post to you regarding your post on May 20, 2019, 03:14:50 AM

"Isn't to my liking"?  Azzerae, certain shades of paint are "not to my liking".  Certain foods are "not to my liking".  Certain exercises are "not to my liking".  Even certain flowers are "not to my liking".  But ANIMAL ABUSE???  No one accept it.  It's not about liking or not liking, it's about right and wrong, isn't it?

I don't intend to push you to change your avatar or do anything.  Although I'm not sure this post exchange is complete yet.  I am all for personal liberties, barring abuse or neglect.  ??"
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Quote from: Azzerae on May 20, 2019, 07:42:40 AM
"It is. I'm sorry its so abhorrent to you. It'll change, in time.   I see."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


A post from me to you around May 20.
"Had to wear blinders."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


My post to you regarding your post on May 20, 2019, 01:50:03 AM
"...The description and image inflict trauma on me and anyone else who is sensitive or who has rescued animals, been in FEMA disasters, survived horrible abuse, had to watch someone die of horrible abuse, been a first responder, worked in ER, fought on a battle field, lost a loved one under horrible circumstances or combinations of such.  Have some respect..."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


My post to you regarding your post on May 13, 2019, 06:42:25 AM
"Azzerae, did you post this?  Where did you get the original image?  When I do a reverse image search, nothing comes up.  Was this a first-hand photo that you created?  Would you please change your avatar?  If it is what you posted, then it's reprehensibly obscene.  When people were growing up in the 90s and 2000s, there was a government advertising trend based on severely graphic images, trying to get young people to stop smoking or doing drugs.  But, it seems to have created a backfire at times."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------


My post to you regarding your post on May 19, 2019, 06:26:23 AM
" ...Evidently you two find humor in the weirdest tone."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


My post to you on: May 18, 2019, 02:27:27 PM
"Azzerae, ...if it was you, stop it and pick on someone your own size.  There is no manhood when the fight is not an even match.  If someone is not in one's league then conquering them should feel like an embarrassment.  Men who pick on weaker beings only prove they are as strong as a weaker being.  You should want to prove strength, not just the ability to overtake weakness.

If you're just trying to get attention cheaply...  You're better than that."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


My public post to Jackstar on May 17, 2019, 08:05:31 PM
"... It was disturbing.  I wondered if he was just trying to get attention.  Or, if he had mental illness.  Even You-Tube prohibits animal abuse; most reasonable websites do."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


My post to you regarding you post on May 14, 2019, 12:52:09 AM
"Azzerae, what is your age range?  Some things just aren't funny.  Even You Tube prohibits animal abuse descriptions."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Your post to me regarding my post on May 12, 2019, 02:05:54 AM
"I failed. Thanks for understanding."
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


My post to you regarding your post on May 02, 2019, 02:18:08 AM
"Anybody who is anybody is not in this room.  It stinks."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


My post to you regarding your post on February 05, 2019, 03:01:49 PM
"An indelicate forum for sure."
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Ellgab:Jun 17.  11:16AM.  My negative assessment of the general tone of your posts.

Re: Azraa's Thread
« Reply #128 on: July 06, 2019, 02:38:06 AM »
Here's what it changes: I was under the impression we made up, and after I promised to ease up on posting things that were getting to you, that we would attempt to be friendlier with one another ...

And now you hit me with this (?) below:...


I didn't "hit" you with anything.  I merely stated the facts to correct your false claim that you stopped offending me when I asked you to.  You did not stop the first zillion times I expressed offense.  And the list below proves it.  Like I said, the list is not perfect.  Some of my "being offended" expressions might not have been perfect.  But, there is a pattern over time of me telling you you were being rude. 

And, how could we have made up when I never expressed any anger to you?  All I did was repeatedly state that your posts were offensive to me as I became more and more distant.  A lot of time went on.  Eventually, you decided to stop offending me.  Where in here do you see the components of friendliness?  Let's recap:  I started out friendly.  I gave you the benefit of the doubt and figured you were just having a bad day early on when you posted obscenity.  But gruesome negativity continued.  Every day it damaged our friendliness.  I expressed offense.  Gruesomeness continued.  Repeatedly.  Friendliness went downhill. I became more and more distant.  At some point, I must have resorted to sinking to the level of having to be disgustingly blunt with you.  And then you stopped offending me.  When you stopped offending me, it was like you kind of emptied a dirty bucket of slop out.  But,emptying a dirty bucket of slop does not turn time back and make the crap heap into a boquet.  And friendliness is like a boquet.

I'm glad the dirty bucket of slop is emptied out.  And I'm a resilient person, Azzy.  If I'm not offended, then as time goes on I usually brighten.  But I also see how you talk to the ladies, using words like bitch and cunt.  You should on some level already know that of course I've read your posts in many threads for some time and this week too, where you post in ways like that.  Even if I don't post you should intuit that I have been there, as much as I've been on the board lately.  So, you're dissociated if you think I wouldn't know you act one way around me and another way when I'm not there.  You would intuit that, as long as you're not drinking, getting good nutrition, and keeping your brain sharp.

Re: Azraa's Thread
« Reply #129 on: July 06, 2019, 02:42:09 AM »
JUST SAY NO TO FAMILY VALUES

On a day when
you're walking
down the street
and you see
a hearse
with a coffin,
followed by
a flower car
and limos,
you know the day
is auspicious,
your plans are going to be
successful;
but on a day when
you see a bride and groom
and wedding party,
watch out,
be careful,
it might be a bad sign.
Just say no
to family values,
and don't quit
your day job.

Drugs
are sacred
substances,
and some drugs
are very sacred substances,
please praise them
for somewhat liberating
the mind.

Tobacco
is a sacred substance
to some,
and even though you've
stopped smoking,
show a little respect.

Alcohol
is totally great,
let us celebrate
the glorious qualities
of booze,
and I had
a good time
being with you.

Just
do it,
just don't
not do it,
just do it.

Christian
fundamentalists,
and fundamentalists
in general,
are viruses,
and they're killing us,
multiplying
and mutating,
and they destroying us,
now, you know,
you got to give
strong medicine
to combat
a virus.

Who's buying?
good acid,
I'm flying,
slipping
and sliding,
slurping
and slamming,
I'm sinking,
dipping
and dripping,
and squirting
inside you;
never
fast forward
a come shot;
milk, milk,
lemonade,
round the corner
where the chocolate's made;
I love to see
your face
when you're suffering.

Do it
with anybody
you want,
whatever
you want,
for as long as you want,
any place,
any place,
when it's possible,
and try to be
safe;
in a situation where
you must abandon
yourself
completely
beyond all concepts.

Twat throat
and cigarette dew,
that floor
would ruin
a sponge mop,
she's the queen
of great bliss;
light
in your heart,
flowing up
a crystal channel
into your eyes
and out
hooking
the world
with compassion.

Just
say
no
to family
values.

We don't have to say No
to family values,
cause we never
think about them;
just
do it,
just make
love
and compassion


- John Giorno
It's never to late to repent, Azzy.  There is no deal with the Devil that God and Jesus can't liberate you from.  You don't have to live this way.  I'm not saying you have to believe in everything in the Bible or have all the answers for Christianity's difficult questions.  But almost everyone believes in God and it's not a stretch to accept Jesus, too.  Besides, if you've made a deal with the Devil, then you already know Jesus is our Savior.  Deals with the Devil can be forgiven and you can triumph over your past.

Re: Azraa's Thread
« Reply #130 on: July 06, 2019, 02:56:22 AM »
That sounds gorgeous a concept - I wish I'd lived within that context. I was awoken many times, rudely, and of course by the dreaded alarm clock, pulling me from bed into the agony of another day. 
-It wasn't as easy as it sounds.  I had horrible sleep deprivation, especially as I got older and more studying was required.  It was physically painful for me to get through many school days, due to lack of sleep.

Totally. I used to fear night time - and sleep - as a kid. I was tremendously anxious about getting into bed at night, and just felt uneasy with the idea of everyone being "out", not in a conscious state.
-That's too bad.  We were light sleepers so that never occurred to me.  Smoke alarms, security alarms, gas detectors, ham radios, scanners, motion lights, motion detectors, car alarms, dogs, locks, window coverings, etc... help.  I just finished care giving for a senior who could tell when anyone, including staff, entered her bedroom because her night light was a motion sensor.  Giving her enough time to dial her emergency service if she felt threatened.

There's always people up at night.  I'm not sure what the average first responder response time is, but in cities, they are not far away.  You could say they are always standing by.  Some are under cover, so while we might not see many patrols, there are more than we know about.  If your computer beeps when you get a new post, you could leave a neighborhood website up and then if there is a neighborhood crisis, posts would wake you up.  Nowadays, cell phones flip out with those loud, piercing amber alerts at all hours.  Some colleges put students on that kind of thing, too.  So, if a fugitive was in your area, you could be awakened by those loud cell tones and the text that follows.  Can be annoying if your cell is based out of a different area.  Sometimes I get Coast from an Internet station in a different state and lately they've been having tornados, so the show keeps getting interrupted by that piercingly loud government emergency broadcast service.


As I grew up, and became an adult, of course I grew to love bed. And sleep was a form of the sweetest escapism, like being dead for a while. The only other time I ever felt that level of anxiousness I experienced as a child around sleep, was when I began listening to Coast (Whitley Strieber and alien abduction in particular). I felt as if something was approaching me, and was frightened still. Whatever it was was completely invisible, and had no form. But it was something, I'm almost sure of it.
-That's different.  Its just background noise to me half the time.

When I was even younger, and had met a friend in college who was evil to the core, this person introduced me to Satanism, got me to do a ritual. The night following that ritual, I had the worst case of sleep paralysis and most oppressive case of suffocation. It felt as if I was sealed in a giant Ziploc bag. I saw a jet black entity which shifted its form, hovering above me. The years that followed this experience were full of drug and alcohol abuse, the wrong company, as well as some of the best, most original artwork I've ever produced to date. I think that's when my depression first began growing.
-Did you get high before the ritual?

Many a truth said in jest! While I suspect Miss Field was being tongue in cheek, Millenials certainly are exhausted most of (if not all) the time. I remember reading this article by Hannah Ewans, on VICE, and finding it equal parts funny and concerning. The Millenials truly are a generation caught between a rock and a hard place ... left with the issues the Boomers created, and not quite in reach of the opportunities Generation Z enjoy.

Dispiriting, so I feel I must offer some hope ... It was Bertrand Russell who said: "Those who live nobly, even if in their life they live obscurely, need not fear that they will have lived in vain. Something radiates from their lives, some light that shows the way to their friends, their neighbours, perhaps to long future ages."
That's a very nice quote.

Re: Azraa's Thread
« Reply #131 on: July 06, 2019, 03:33:22 AM »
Even if I don't post you should intuit that I have been there, as much as I've been on the board lately.  So, you're dissociated if you think I wouldn't know you act one way around me and another way when I'm not there.

Has anybody ever met with your high standards? Has anybody ever managed to change themselves enough to conform to the demands that you make (on or off the internet)?

Here you admit that the guy changes his behaviour FOR YOU, when you are around so that you are not offended- but it's still not enough.

*Don't worry, I'm braced for a wall of text (and hopefully another avatar upgrade)...

*THE BI-FORUM SHADOW RIDERS BULLET LIST*
« Reply #132 on: July 06, 2019, 03:53:32 AM »
In continuation of yesterday's breakdown (which can be found here), I now list the Shadow Riders of BellGab, as well as the knock-off board known as "EllGab" - those spry and often topical types whose presence in either forum seems less predicated upon cyber bullying than some actual desire to share and discuss matters not related to the latest YouTube emotional crisis or call for attention.

Rikki Gins: Mute in the Heather hating, ambivalent to YouTube vanity video mockery, and an historical thread curator and purveyor of images and highlights from popular history over the past centenary. Postcards, gardening, fruit crate labels, photos from the Great War - you name it - Rikki is the penultimate subject-driven librarian of both groups. When there is a need to escape stalking for what used to be reality - Rikki is your Ticketmaster - priceless admission, and invaluable safe space in a realm of personal head games.

Up All Night: Not as frequent a hard topic participant, but loathe to spend much time in the catty world of personal spite and perceived forum outrages. Like a sleek car with a fresh wax job, the waters of ideological pee tend to bead and roll off his hood with little impedance. Knows trains and a lot more in political conservatism - shares judiciously but always competently - a safe read in the best sense. Has seemingly chosen Ell over BellGab and one wonders why.

Albrecht: The objective research-driven conservative. If you desire informational clarity - your best port in almost any storm. How he thrives in the current clime must be a testimony to an open mind but also a keen sorting mechanism. One can't go wrong working a subject with him in either forum. Post load seems to vary but bi-forum confirmed.

Juan: Another mainly topical poster, not one to spend more than a few sentences on the personal train wreckage, the kind of person you'd want to share an Uber with - well read, interesting, diverse, generally conservative, but not stridently so - evenly split between the forums - would make a dandy neighbour IRL.

Jedimiller*: The designated EllGab chew toy, hateful Angie's "beta male", Dynamo Hum's occasional handmaiden and supplicant - Bart's Wootacular "Coors Man" - a lost soul with a soft and passionate nature and a fondness for Heather that seems cloyingly genuine. Seeking attention, friendship, strokes, but trapped in the game of offering up increasingly higher levels of his own life on YouTube to get there. Has played the buffoon, the tough guy, the ingenue, the street wise loser (so many roles really) that one can say chameleon and not be unkind. High needs treading between two hater groups to get them filled. Call "Milluh" the "Wicker Man" of EllGab, as there he will meet his cyber pyre one day. Topical fidelity mainly to Star Wars action figures - where he oddly shares less of his acumen than one would expect.

Gravity Sucks: Makes both lists just because. The ultimate solipsist - willing to share all his rip-snorting Air force career memories in his own vanity thread because ... when you get old and bunged up - what else can you do?  Has gone all-in as a supplicant to Bart and become an EllGab narc - likely reliving some perceived chain of command reverie from his service days - something Bart swiftly pounced upon when recruiting him over from Bellgab. Oddly entwined with another long time BellGabber who shall remain unnamed.

Aldous Burbank: Has made the EllGab homesteading list, but one wonders why? Might be some remnant shame at having hooked Art and Redacted up, might be his distaste for political rants and wars. A wholly non-invasive species, tolerant, friendly, educated, mostly apolitical, somehow apart from the Heather hating and cyber bullying - old soul is the safe bet. This kind of liberal is a native species of the late 1960's - must be watered occasionally and like any desert succulent can survive long periods of drought - topical or otherwise.

Chefist: A bi-forum original in the same sense as the above - many similarities there. Abused in a hatefully personal manner on EllGab - the butt of their Wootacular derision for his alleged drinking, yet a wise and elder statesman upon whose back such attacks slide off like water from a Muscovy duck. No cyber bullying from Chefist - all things said in good humor and with no malice. One would say likeable and not regret the choice. One would also be lucky to have his culinary ministrations - something he seemingly shares less of these days.

Paladin: An "FBI man" - the former Gyrene is the cock of the walk in EllGab, recently tangled with MD in this very terrain. Will trend more to the former as the abuse MD heaps on him seems to have its effect. The first Marine to retreat? Harsh - but study the posting dearth in BellGab: when made as a narc by MD he quickly departed. Seeks to garner female attention through alpha male rants and diatribes. Yet sadly one can sense no personal fulfillment from the act. Largely - wait for it - atopical! If you can get FBI to engage on point you have achieved something, otherwise a carrion feeder for whomever either forum is dissecting and consuming.

KSM: 100% Bart's "left hand man" at EllGab, or seems to relish the prospect and does his level best to act accordingly. A lower order BellGab presence as Liberace! offers no ego strokes or special "moderator" privileges. The bi-forum outlier award - not a hater, not a bully per se, not even terribly interested in such games. One can intuit a sensitive core, an innate gentleness, a playfully humorous side, and also a void that can be only partly filled by the bully culture of either board. Also gets the aloof award, as when the shit gets too deep, he sidesteps it and sidelines himself in his man cave. A tragic shame to see soul depth like his wasted kow-towing to Bart's unfillable maw of an ego. Potential fall guy, but always (so far) saved by his own "decency".

Rally Squirrel: Likes drama (a Senda thread adherent initially) but prefers the targets be active courtesans of their own scripted disaster as opposed to mere milk jugs to be ventilated. Trended hard to EllGab as Bart picked up on his sensitivity, became instantly peeved when YouTube-stalked by Brig. Likes the game well enough, less so when it's pointed at him. Somewhat of a subject cipher - might be a bi-forum NPC in the final analysis, not in the pejorative sense.

Walks_at_Night: Has penned two of the greatest non-bullying threads in either venue - 'Red Heat' and 'My Fathers Notebook'. Seems to have been inveigled by Bart's use of his material in the Wootaculars, or perhaps is just using Bart for the audience reach provided ... the latter a strong likelihood. Willing to dabble a wee bit in the hazing, but hardly an adherent to that forum norm. Rikki Gins with a creative writing license to enthrall - wasted talent in these back waters of cyber bullying.

Sixteen/Sofia/Monica/14: It's all about her - on either venue. Needs to be listened to, hates to be rushed or judged, over shares, then lashes back at others (kinda like me?) ... Bi-forum because it's impossible to get enough strokes from either, but can be driven to full retreat by Jackstar or MD. Subject fidelity to abortion, elder care, dogs, and family dysfunction. A truly nice lady who does not belong in either world regardless of how much she enjoyed Art or hates George. Consistently inconsistent in her tonality, has some anger management issues, but then who doesn't?

Starr Mountain: The WWG1WGA girl, either board's solid patriot. No cyberbully here, at all. Has been MIA from both boards after suffering multiple bouts of paranoia (which I can empathize with). A cooperative soul - seeks consensus and agreement, yet seems baffled when her efforts are buffed. Basic solid good stuff with a lot more personal depth than she feels safe sharing. Seems to have seen through the bully game and taken her old soul and sharing elsewhere. The kind of person who wants to be liked and will like in return - a reciprocal wonder, gem-like qualities of no use to either board or any of their stalker agenda. Wise.


Re: Azraa's Thread
« Reply #133 on: July 06, 2019, 04:09:34 AM »
Has anybody ever met with [Sixteen's] high standards? Has anybody ever managed to change themselves enough to conform to the demands that [Sixteen makes]?

[Sixteen admits] that [AZRAA] changes [their] behaviour FOR [HER], when [she is] around so that [she is] not offended - but it's still not enough.

She knows in her heart by now that I suffer with a serious case of mental illness, yet expects me to constantly rise to her personal demands. I've tried and tried to please her and offer friendship, and I suspect because of something horrible in her past, she exhibits dominance disproportionately, and unnecessarily. I do feel for her, seeing as though it affects her ability to maintain real boundaries or form lasting relationships. She's told me I'm the one who needs cognitive behavioural therapy*, yet with all my personal struggles I seem to have more insight into both her and my own behaviour than she does.

I'm a very considerate and gentle personality, and many take advantage of it, once its revealed. Sometimes I can't control my moods, so I'm forgiving when others can't, because I know that road, and how it feels.

But I'm patient. I'll forgive and forget, even if I'm not shown the same level of respect, because that's just how I am.

* And I do need it, my insurance just doesn't cover it, so I haven't been able to afford it just yet. I'm sure it'll be better for everyone once I'm regularly going to therapy.

Re: Azraa's Thread
« Reply #134 on: July 06, 2019, 05:26:41 AM »
Sixteen is remarkably quick to take insult where none was given and mete out her angry punishments accordingly. This is kinda how it feels, when we go round in self-created circles:



And yeah, you could say Lucy is me some of the time, her some of the time, that Charlie Brown is interchangeable with us both at other times.

What I won't do is succumb to defeat and lose hope that her behaviours will change in this regard.

Re: *THE BI-FORUM SHADOW RIDERS BULLET LIST*
« Reply #135 on: July 06, 2019, 05:34:44 AM »
2 more additions, continued from above:

K-Dubb: The bard of either board, the baker supreme, the funny pipe guy, the erudite and cunning linguist - but not a bully in any sense of the word. Seems to hold himself both above and aside from the actual personal spite - yet will play into the action, then deflect past it with uncommon gymnastic skill. Here for his own ends, need not announce nor share them, but content to let others slightly define them ... to a point. Too smart and stable for this game, yet like a cat by the tub fascinated by the swirling drain action. Hasn't taken a dive yet, may not either.

WOTR: Used to "place hold" K-Dubb's kindly persona just a bit. Lately a more active BellGab ass-kicker unafraid to roll in the mud with the piggies and now (surprisingly) no longer trying to set himself above the fray and its filthy parameters. Might be a late phase ego shift, but is taking some glee in being just slightly hurtful. One imagines other issues beneath the surface being resolved or re-played though BellGab as an emotional petri dish of sorts. Has had better days, seems to have left his kinder gentler EllGab act in the locker room.

Re: Azzerae's Thread
« Reply #136 on: July 06, 2019, 08:45:02 AM »
And I thought you liked me!

Re: Azraa's Thread
« Reply #137 on: July 06, 2019, 09:14:17 AM »

* And I do need it, my insurance just doesn't cover it, so I haven't been able to afford it just yet. I'm sure it'll be better for everyone once I'm regularly going to therapy.
CBT is largely self directed. A therapist would guide you through the principles, but in the end you're doing most of the work. A good book by Dr David Burns is available online

https://archive.org/details/FeelingGood-TheNewMoodTherapy/page/n69

Don't be fooled by it's cheesy/pop psychology title.

I also find Vippasana/mindfullness meditation helps. Basically you sit quietly, empty your mind and focus on your breathing. Observe any thoughts, without judgment and letting them float out of your mind and go back to focus on your breathing

I hope this helps

Re: *THE BI-FORUM SHADOW RIDERS BULLET LIST*
« Reply #138 on: July 06, 2019, 02:15:28 PM »
In continuation of yesterday's breakdown (which can be found here), I now list the Shadow Riders of BellGab, as well as the knock-off board known as "EllGab" - those spry and often topical types whose presence in either forum seems less predicated upon cyber bullying than some actual desire to share and discuss matters not related to the latest YouTube emotional crisis or call for attention.

Rikki Gins: Mute in the Heather hating, ambivalent to YouTube vanity video mockery, and an historical thread curator and purveyor of images and highlights from popular history over the past centenary. Postcards, gardening, fruit crate labels, photos from the Great War - you name it - Rikki is the penultimate subject-driven librarian of both groups. When there is a need to escape stalking for what used to be reality - Rikki is your Ticketmaster - priceless admission, and invaluable safe space in a realm of personal head games.

Up All Night: Not as frequent a hard topic participant, but loathe to spend much time in the catty world of personal spite and perceived forum outrages. Like a sleek car with a fresh wax job, the waters of ideological pee tend to bead and roll off his hood with little impedance. Knows trains and a lot more in political conservatism - shares judiciously but always competently - a safe read in the best sense. Has seemingly chosen Ell over BellGab and one wonders why.

Albrecht: The objective research-driven conservative. If you desire informational clarity - your best port in almost any storm. How he thrives in the current clime must be a testimony to an open mind but also a keen sorting mechanism. One can't go wrong working a subject with him in either forum. Post load seems to vary but bi-forum confirmed.

Juan: Another mainly topical poster, not one to spend more than a few sentences on the personal train wreckage, the kind of person you'd want to share an Uber with - well read, interesting, diverse, generally conservative, but not stridently so - evenly split between the forums - would make a dandy neighbour IRL.

Jedimiller*: The designated EllGab chew toy, hateful Angie's "beta male", Dynamo Hum's occasional handmaiden and supplicant - Bart's Wootacular "Coors Man" - a lost soul with a soft and passionate nature and a fondness for Heather that seems cloyingly genuine. Seeking attention, friendship, strokes, but trapped in the game of offering up increasingly higher levels of his own life on YouTube to get there. Has played the buffoon, the tough guy, the ingenue, the street wise loser (so many roles really) that one can say chameleon and not be unkind. High needs treading between two hater groups to get them filled. Call "Milluh" the "Wicker Man" of EllGab, as there he will meet his cyber pyre one day. Topical fidelity mainly to Star Wars action figures - where he oddly shares less of his acumen than one would expect.

Gravity Sucks: Makes both lists just because. The ultimate solipsist - willing to share all his rip-snorting Air force career memories in his own vanity thread because ... when you get old and bunged up - what else can you do?  Has gone all-in as a supplicant to Bart and become an EllGab narc - likely reliving some perceived chain of command reverie from his service days - something Bart swiftly pounced upon when recruiting him over from Bellgab. Oddly entwined with another long time BellGabber who shall remain unnamed.

Aldous Burbank: Has made the EllGab homesteading list, but one wonders why? Might be some remnant shame at having hooked Art and Redacted up, might be his distaste for political rants and wars. A wholly non-invasive species, tolerant, friendly, educated, mostly apolitical, somehow apart from the Heather hating and cyber bullying - old soul is the safe bet. This kind of liberal is a native species of the late 1960's - must be watered occasionally and like any desert succulent can survive long periods of drought - topical or otherwise.

Chefist: A bi-forum original in the same sense as the above - many similarities there. Abused in a hatefully personal manner on EllGab - the butt of their Wootacular derision for his alleged drinking, yet a wise and elder statesman upon whose back such attacks slide off like water from a Muscovy duck. No cyber bullying from Chefist - all things said in good humor and with no malice. One would say likeable and not regret the choice. One would also be lucky to have his culinary ministrations - something he seemingly shares less of these days.

Paladin: An "FBI man" - the former Gyrene is the cock of the walk in EllGab, recently tangled with MD in this very terrain. Will trend more to the former as the abuse MD heaps on him seems to have its effect. The first Marine to retreat? Harsh - but study the posting dearth in BellGab: when made as a narc by MD he quickly departed. Seeks to garner female attention through alpha male rants and diatribes. Yet sadly one can sense no personal fulfillment from the act. Largely - wait for it - atopical! If you can get FBI to engage on point you have achieved something, otherwise a carrion feeder for whomever either forum is dissecting and consuming.

KSM: 100% Bart's "left hand man" at EllGab, or seems to relish the prospect and does his level best to act accordingly. A lower order BellGab presence as Liberace! offers no ego strokes or special "moderator" privileges. The bi-forum outlier award - not a hater, not a bully per se, not even terribly interested in such games. One can intuit a sensitive core, an innate gentleness, a playfully humorous side, and also a void that can be only partly filled by the bully culture of either board. Also gets the aloof award, as when the shit gets too deep, he sidesteps it and sidelines himself in his man cave. A tragic shame to see soul depth like his wasted kow-towing to Bart's unfillable maw of an ego. Potential fall guy, but always (so far) saved by his own "decency".

Rally Squirrel: Likes drama (a Senda thread adherent initially) but prefers the targets be active courtesans of their own scripted disaster as opposed to mere milk jugs to be ventilated. Trended hard to EllGab as Bart picked up on his sensitivity, became instantly peeved when YouTube-stalked by Brig. Likes the game well enough, less so when it's pointed at him. Somewhat of a subject cipher - might be a bi-forum NPC in the final analysis, not in the pejorative sense.

Walks_at_Night: Has penned two of the greatest non-bullying threads in either venue - 'Red Heat' and 'My Fathers Notebook'. Seems to have been inveigled by Bart's use of his material in the Wootaculars, or perhaps is just using Bart for the audience reach provided ... the latter a strong likelihood. Willing to dabble a wee bit in the hazing, but hardly an adherent to that forum norm. Rikki Gins with a creative writing license to enthrall - wasted talent in these back waters of cyber bullying.

Sixteen/Sofia/Monica/14: It's all about her - on either venue. Needs to be listened to, hates to be rushed or judged, over shares, then lashes back at others (kinda like me?) ... Bi-forum because it's impossible to get enough strokes from either, but can be driven to full retreat by Jackstar or MD. Subject fidelity to abortion, elder care, dogs, and family dysfunction. A truly nice lady who does not belong in either world regardless of how much she enjoyed Art or hates George. Consistently inconsistent in her tonality, has some anger management issues, but then who doesn't?

Starr Mountain: The WWG1WGA girl, either board's solid patriot. No cyberbully here, at all. Has been MIA from both boards after suffering multiple bouts of paranoia (which I can empathize with). A cooperative soul - seeks consensus and agreement, yet seems baffled when her efforts are buffed. Basic solid good stuff with a lot more personal depth than she feels safe sharing. Seems to have seen through the bully game and taken her old soul and sharing elsewhere. The kind of person who wants to be liked and will like in return - a reciprocal wonder, gem-like qualities of no use to either board or any of their stalker agenda. Wise.

Ha. I prefer to be called, "trans-forum", thank you! LOL...haven't read or posted over there in months, after the OG BG came back online...but I appreciate the shout out.  ;D

Re: Azzerae's Thread
« Reply #139 on: July 06, 2019, 02:21:57 PM »
I think it's unfair to call chefist 'bi' anyway. That short-lived experiment with heterosexuality came to an end some time ago and he's gone back to what he knows best.

Re: Azzerae's Thread
« Reply #140 on: July 06, 2019, 02:22:53 PM »
I think it's unfair to call chefist 'bi' anyway. That short-lived experiment with heterosexuality came to an end some time ago and he's gone back to what he knows best.

At least I got a daughter out of that fleeting 10 year experiment.  8)

Re: Azzerae's Thread
« Reply #141 on: July 06, 2019, 02:28:12 PM »
At least I got a daughter out of that fleeting 10 year experiment.  8)

As you're so fond of saying: 'A woman for duty, a boy for pleasure, a goat for ecstasy '.

Re: *THE BI-FORUM SHADOW RIDERS BULLET LIST*
« Reply #142 on: July 06, 2019, 02:33:17 PM »
In continuation of yesterday's breakdown (which can be found here), I now list the Shadow Riders of BellGab,

After six years of study here, my conclusions mirror your own. This is solid work.


I suffer with a serious case of mental illness

Walk it off.

Re: Azraa's Thread
« Reply #143 on: July 06, 2019, 02:37:23 PM »
Has anybody ever met with your high standards? Has anybody ever managed to change themselves enough to conform to the demands that you make (on or off the internet)?

Here you admit that the guy changes his behaviour FOR YOU, when you are around so that you are not offended- but it's still not enough.

*Don't worry, I'm braced for a wall of text (and hopefully another avatar upgrade)...
It's not much of a standard to refrain from posting the torture and murder of a small pet. 

As for it "not" being enough that Azzy stopped posting gore, STOP PUTTING WORDS IN MY MOUTH.  Your words portray me wrong.  Why would you say Azzy being civil is not enough for me?  That doesn't even make sense.  I am perfectly satisfied with Azzy stopping posting gore, although it came late.  But that doesn't mean I have to do an about-face and start calling him Honey just because he decided to be civil.

And, expressing offense wasn't "FOR ME", it was on behalf of everyone who believes in the legal Internet standard of forbidding online animal abuse.  A group that surely you are in.

Keep your eye on how you view the truth because you color other people outside the lines when you put words in their mouth.  Some truth strategies are safe, like some little white lies, wifespeak to your wife, momspeak to your mom, layers of some onions of truth, etc...  because people know when they are fudging.  But, unwitting, insidious mis-portrayals of truth leave you, WOTR, operating in a world a little bit like the Wizard of Oz.  Unwitting bending of truth leaves a person open to the dark side because Satan capitalizes on deceit and you could be negatively affected.

Re: Azzerae's Thread
« Reply #144 on: July 06, 2019, 02:39:42 PM »
As you're so fond of saying: 'A woman for duty, a boy for pleasure, a goat for ecstasy '.

Might be nice if this were explored more deeply in a new episode of Martinez Tonight.

Re: Azzerae's Thread
« Reply #145 on: July 06, 2019, 02:39:59 PM »

Re: Azzerae's Thread
« Reply #146 on: July 06, 2019, 03:02:50 PM »
Well thanks for making me a line item in the list AZRAA.   I think?   ;)     

A definite reminder that I need to get back to work on the Notebook.  I left it with my Dad fighting the damned French of all people.   :o

Re: Azzerae's Thread
« Reply #147 on: July 06, 2019, 03:07:20 PM »
Might be nice if this were explored more deeply in a new episode of Martinez Tonight.

At least, I thought that's what he said. It was getting near the end of the show and his usually crystal-clear diction had thickened somewhat by then.

Re: Azzerae's Thread
« Reply #148 on: July 06, 2019, 03:10:25 PM »
Dear, sweet Azz.  What this must have cost you in attention and creativity!  I cannot pretend to endorse all of your sketches -- I bully Shreddie and that foul Dane Groyper most relentlessly -- but they are convincingly and masterfully drawn.

Re: Azzerae's Thread
« Reply #149 on: July 06, 2019, 03:18:17 PM »
I bully Shreddie

I used to have an English Bull Terrier. It got along with all dogs but all dogs didn't necessarily get along with him. When faced with a yappy little rat of a Yorkshire Terrier, who would bare its teeth and growl at him, he would stand there indulgently and let him continue, never letting on that one quick snap and shake of the jaws was all it would take to silence the little insect permanently.