The Black Sword of the Pissed Off Realm

[Camazotz Automat]

12:54 AM Dec 6, while George was questioning Varla Ventura about superstitions, Varla was talking about why opening an umbrella inside was not a good idea for practical reasons.

At this point George interjected "Plus they're lightning rods aren't they?"

STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID.

[Frys Girl]

Oh Cam. That is just fucking horrible. I wish it was a lightening rod. I'd stick it in his ass. Maybe then he'd grow some talent and talking capabilities? probably NOT.

[Camazotz Automat]

Oh Cam. That is just fucking horrible. I wish it was a lightening rod. I'd stick it in his ass. Maybe then he'd grow some talent and talking capabilities? probably NOT.

(said in the voice of Bender) That's my girl!  Er, I mean, that's Fry's girl!   

[Camazotz Automat]

So I'm sitting in my ergo-chair, mindin' my own fuckin' business.  I turn on the radio.  Mistake.  George Noory again.  He has a great broad on, Diane Hennacy, talking about ESP and she knows her stuff.  You can tell.  Even with Noory's inane drivel, I found her pretty goddamn engaging.  However, when that last hour came, Noory showed no ability to adapt to Diane's ability to talk at length in a very interesting manner.  She's the type of guest that could do the whole show for him if he would only shut the fuck up. 

But he couldn't wait to get to "the callers" with "their stories" so he could go completely on automatic pilot and leave his guest hanging at the same time.   FUCK THE CALLERS!

I say that with gusto, like Tom Cruise said in Vanilla Sky about his arm when addressing the surgical team. 

FUCK MY ARM! (you have to see it)

It's TALK radio, not inbred redneck delusional stupid caller radio.

Once again, we had to hear from a psychic caller who saw September 11 before it happened.  Once again someone had to mention Tesla (in the first hour) as if they knew what the hell they were talking about.

Noory allowed these yahoos on bad cell phone connections to digress so much that I almost forgot there was a guest with a magnificent brain present.  All the while, George is throwing his "absolutely" out there over and over, with his "Isn't that right?" bullshit.  It's enough to put me in the ER with a cardiac event, begging Dr. Death for sweet release. 

If I hear that unimaginative lazy bastard ask "Why is that?" one more time...

I hate it when the guest is telling a good story and Noory interrupts the guest and states "Phoenix, you're on, go ahead with your question." He then allows "Bryan in Phoenix" to talk all the way up to almost time for a commercial, dumps the caller, asks the guest a leading question, only to interrupt the guest after 30 seconds to go to the commercial.

I've never witnessed such inept EXCREMENT.  If only I could be there in the studio with a flamethrower.  And what is it now with all the mispronunciations even during his commercials?  Catalog has become Clatalog.  Aren't those commercials prerecorded? Can't they correct that crap before airing it? Imagine if Noory had administered the presidential oath. Christ on a gnarly ceramic crutch.

My tolerance is either lower or George has, somehow, incredibly, gotten WORSE than before.

And we are SICK of hearing about your ~Aunt "Caligula"~ George.  (>>>>>-----KICK!!!!!!!!!!!!-------->)  Put a sock in it.  Her death by radio is one big honking metaphor of what you are doing to the audience on a nightly basis.  Radio killed her, and you, through our radios, are killing us, only her death was much much quicker. 

It's like bad criminal TV psychology:

"Don't you see you're killing your aunt over and over and over?"

My contempt for Noory is exceeded only by my intellect.  Barely.    It's a close humping race.

Also, he's coming through much too clear, as if they got a new microphone.  I hear every little cough and snort and snicker from the jackass.  Makes me want to strangle him.

[Jenny Haniver]

Excellent recap, Camazotz!    I listened to last night's show too (a once in a blue moon occurance) even though I knew I would regret it.  I had to work late and the guest was interesting.  How rare that is on C2C these days!  You're right-  she could have done the whole show for him but he nooried it up as usual.

"Don't you see you're killing your aunt over and over and over?" 

I hate how the stupid/crazy/boring callers are allowed to ramble on and on ad nauseum.  It's clear nobody is in charge of the show anymore.  I made it through the guy (clearly off his meds) and his 'mathematical' theory of how the universe works, illustrated by some crack-brained defective toaster analogy.  Then there was the trucker with his long and boring dream about the destruction of some city that might be Chicago, although he's not sure.  The poor guest, having to comment on this drivel!  I guess she gets a lot of practice.  She is a psychiatrist after all. 

I turned off the radio and took some aspirin.  Never again!

[11angeleyes11]

Excellent recap, Camazotz!    I listened to last night's show too (a once in a blue moon occurance) even though I knew I would regret it.  I had to work late and the guest was interesting.  How rare that is on C2C these days!  You're right-  she could have done the whole show for him but he nooried it up as usual.

"Don't you see you're killing your aunt over and over and over?" 

I hate how the stupid/crazy/boring callers are allowed to ramble on and on ad nauseum.  It's clear nobody is in charge of the show anymore.  I made it through the guy (clearly off his meds) and his 'mathematical' theory of how the universe works, illustrated by some crack-brained defective toaster analogy.  Then there was the trucker with his long and boring dream about the destruction of some city that might be Chicago, although he's not sure.  The poor guest, having to comment on this drivel!  I guess she gets a lot of practice.  She is a psychiatrist after all. 

I turned off the radio and took some aspirin.  Never again!

Aspirins are not strong enough for me; I drank Hemlock lost night to end my pain, but my hell hath no fury.  I awoke this morning in anguish to suffer through another night of Noory, eternally pissed applying  it to the suck forum. 

[Frys Girl]

So many great points in Cam's post. Wow. Where to begin?

I am really sad for people who work in radio/broadcast. If Noory is a "star" the standard is basically squirrel droppings. Considering the talent out there AND the state of the economy, there are much better alternatives. I truly think Noory has his job possibly because of some kind of extortion scheme. He must have seen someone boning someone they shouldn't have been - there is no other satisfactory explination.

I am sick of hearing about Congress releasing "EMERGENCY FUNS" and "AGENSHES".

Thanks for your post Cam. It had been a while since we got a good Noory rant here. You always come through.

[Centurion73]

Great post from all. I listened on and off because the guest was a rare one with intelligence, how many times did she not understand Noory's strange questions? How many times did she tell George he was wrong or he had it wrong? How fucking stupid or disturbed is he if she could not even follow his ramblings with her being a psychiatrist and all.

[Pirate King Atomsk]

It's TALK radio, not inbred redneck delusional stupid caller radio.

Once again, we had to hear from a psychic caller who saw September 11 before it happened. 

Every time one of those people call in..I swear...




And when George lets them ramble on I eventually just...




GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

[Camazotz Automat]

"You look like Edgar Cayce." - Noory to David Wilcock.

In truth, this Wilcock resembles none other than a delusional Tom Petty. 

After perusing the website, I suggest you reconsider spending a $75 annual fee to purchase unlimited access to David Wilcock?s new MP3 archive of readings, public appearances, radio shows, music & personal weblogs.

Instead, purchase a book: Opus Mago-cabbalisticum Et Theosophicum by Georg Von Welling.

Amazon, $50. (a one time charge)

You'll have much more fun with this book than listening to a Tom Petty clone talk about hyper-dimensional physics, stargates, and 2012.

P.S. Everytime Noory closes Friday's show with the UFO Phil Song, a little piece of me is asphyxiated.

[danDNA]

he looks a bit like the bloke from that program with the wife from 'married with children' and the dad who died from a heart attack on set and the daughter from 'the big bang theory', cant remember what its called, its really not that great, but i think he might be called david too....


also, couldnt we start a sort of 'debrief' campaign where we contact guests who have just had an awful time on C"C saying 'i am sorry you had to endure 4 hours with that idiot george noory, if you would like to talk please visit coastgab.com, we would love your feedback on the experience'.

[EvB]

also, couldnt we start a sort of 'debrief' campaign where we contact guests who have just had an awful time on C"C saying 'i am sorry you had to endure 4 hours with that idiot george noory, if you would like to talk please visit coastgab.com, we would love your feedback on the experience'.

People have made similar suggestions before.  It's still a good idea.  The question is, how do we reel 'em in?

[MV/Liberace!]

...a little piece of me is asphyxiated.

bwahaha

[MV/Liberace!]

People have made similar suggestions before.  It's still a good idea.  The question is, how do we reel 'em in?

fact is, if you google george noory, this site falls as the fifth or sixth result, immediately under his scifi bilge.  if people want to comment on their experiences with him, i think chances are they'll simply find us and go for it.  hell, it has happened before. 

remember howard west?
http://coastgab.com/index.php/topic,85.msg644.html#msg644

i would LOVE to see a campaign to get those disgruntled guests over here.  hopefully someone with more time on their hands than i can get the ball rolling.

[Camazotz Automat]

I'm back in my realm and I carry a black sword.

And I'm pissed off tonight.

While talking to Bart Kosko about the human brain's abilities versus current computer computational power ... George quips:

"If I had to restart my brain as often as I do my computer, it would drive me crazy! HAHAHAHAHA!"

I mean.  Jesus Christ.  Why aren't we supplied a punching bag with this excrement?  I have to hit something NOW and there isn't anything within reach that is of no value.  There used to be, but I've destroyed all of the lesser objects around my computer during previous anger incidents induced by Noory's poison.

Bart didn't respond to George's outdated computer whining, which was similar to complaining about W(h)in(e) 98.  It's an old way to try to be hip... pretending you are SO PUT OUT by your computer's failings... Noory is light years behind in PCs.  If his computer needs to be restarted all the time, then he has either fucked it up or has a cheap computer, bad software, what have you. 

You would THINK George's superiors would provide him with top of the line electronics.

Guess not.

I'm waiting on the edge of my seat for George to next exclaim "Garbage in, garbage out!  HAHAHAHAHA!"

What a fucking moron.  He's laughing HARD tonight.  George is JOLLY.  I hate him.  I'm not just on here to say, "well he's a good guy... he just happens to suck."

NO.

I HATE GEORGE NOORY. 

Condescending JACK ASS.

He doesn't know how to interview someone like Kosko, so resorts to myopic weird SHIT that NO ONE cares about and NO ONE wants to hear...

And George is LAUGHING the whole way!!!

God SAVE ME.  I can't stop listening, because I enjoy some of Kosko's observations.

BUT GEORGE WILL NOT PUT A SOCK IN IT.

Now this IDIOT GEORGE is letting in the brain dead callers because IDIOT GEORGE can't carry a conversation with someone of a higher IQ than his own.  This means almost ALL HIS GUESTS.  Even the CRAZY ones.

(sharpening my necrotic blade)

[Camazotz Automat]

Enough time has elapsed that I feel it appropriate to repost last year's mission statement for this limb:

"When Noory Says something that TRULY just PISSES ME OFF to the point of becoming physically ill ...

Before experiencing arrhythmia, blurred vision, or before committing homicide, I come here to confess my sins...

The Black Sword of the Pissed Off Realm feeds the need for bleed."

- Camazotz Automat, August 08, 2008, 05:43:10 AM

[EvB]

Somehow the day just starts better with a Cam.  Well, that - and I used Stream Link to listen to an old Knapp last night.

[Camazotz Automat]

Somehow the day just starts better with a Cam.  Well, that - and I used Stream Link to listen to an old Knapp last night.

Thanks, Ev. 

I love that hat.   I didn't know aluminum could be so sexy.

[Camazotz Automat]

Oh, the IRONY OF TONIGHT'S SHOW!!!!

George Noory's very existence, questions, & observations argue AGAINST intelligent design !!!!

[Camazotz Automat]

"And we have Jim Berkland's website which is scissor gee dot com."

SYZYGY, George, SYZYGY! Goddamn it!  SYZYFUCKIN'GY!!!!!!

It's an astronomical term.  Look it UP, chowder-head!  Perhaps educating yourself about it will help you pronounce it!

"I will hate George Noory more, forever." - Chief Camazotz The Elder

[Camazotz Automat]

One of the things that bothers me the most about Noory is the sound of his voice - the fake inflection, the syrupy "let's work together as a team" projection, his pedantic "don't run with scissors" modulation... (CHRIST!) 

I don't have the energy or desire to visit his shortcomings this morning.  Instead, I will post a video of something vastly more pleasant... the construction of musical instruments by the hand of a World War II vet.  I was amazed by this man's craftsmanship.  The facts presented in these seven minutes eclipse MONTHS of anything proffered by CTC.  As a guitar player, I am biased as to the attraction of this clip, but I sincerely believe non players will enjoy it, too. 

More than one of you will think, I wouldn't mind owning an "Everett Fulton."

I have a scarab/rhinoceros beetle mandolin design in mind, with wood wing covers that lift open revealing thin sheets of celluloid susceptible to vibration protected by a gold mesh screen... such an open wing display would indicate an imminent and severe heavy metal medieval blue grass misty mountain black dog breakdown.

Imagine the Abominable Dr. Phibes, Roy Clark, & Jimmy Page rolled into one penetrating performance of an obscure soldier song by the title of MAIDEN KNICKERBOCKER AND THE GALLANT CAPTAIN PICKWICK and you would "have my number" as it were.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qFi9tyo-Rww

[Supernormal]

One of the things that bothers me the most about Noory is the sound of his voice - the fake inflection, the syrupy "let's work together as a team" projection, his pedantic "don't run with scissors" modulation. 
                                                               Imagine the Abominable Dr. Phibes, Roy Clark, & Jimmy Page rolled into one penetrating performance.

You're on the money yet again. It's like a combination of Barney and Mister Rogers. Another thing that grates on one's nerves is when he goes on a fake emoting (gasp, gosh, geeze, gack) spree.

Rest in peace, Les Paul, the unsung Tesla of guitars.

[Camazotz Automat]

Rest in peace, Les Paul, the unsung Tesla of guitars.

What an appropriate description.

It is unfortunate the media chose to largely ignore his death.  I've heard it mentioned, but you will not hear anything about him next week.   I saw a fascinating Les Paul documentary on PBS a couple of years ago.

I wonder if younger electric guitar players realize exactly how important Les Paul was to their future - does their depth exceed anything beyond their desire for a "gold top?"