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"PROCEED WITH YOUR CAT STORY!"

Started by thoughtcrime, October 16, 2015, 07:30:01 PM

thoughtcrime

I'm wondering if anyone remembers this open lines moment. The guy called and asked to speak with Art (which always exasperated him) so he pretended to be a talking robot that answers calls for Art. The guy totally bought it! He said he had a cat story he wanted to share with Art. Art said he would have to tell him (the robot) before he could tell the story to Art. The guy got offended and said he didn't think it was right to have to talk to a machine instead of Art. It went back and forth for a while but eventually Art had had enough. He yelled, "PROCEED WITH YOUR CAT STORY!"

So the guy told the story, which if I remember was that his cat had an unusual talent. The cat would lie on its back and reach its paws up under the refrigerator, where it had apparently put a rubber band to strum on, and the cat would play some sort of music under the fridge. Art asked if the guy had ever seen the cat do this and he said no, he just assumed that's what it was since there was no other explanation.

So the guy's fridge is making a weird noise and he immediately comes to the most ridiculous conclusion! He was definitely stoned. Me and my friend found it so funny that we made up a version for my cat. When he went outside he might be gone for a couple hours. So I concluded he was a tap-dancing cat and would perform at a small local theater under the name Mr. Sparkles. I mean, the cat was gone, so what other conclusion could I draw? I never bothered to see my cat perform, I just knew he did it.

Anyway, this is probably my best open lines memory. Does anyone have audio of this? I want to hear it again SO bad!

popple


albrecht

Quote from: thoughtcrime on October 16, 2015, 07:30:01 PM
I'm wondering if anyone remembers this open lines moment. The guy called and asked to speak with Art (which always exasperated him) so he pretended to be a talking robot that answers calls for Art. The guy totally bought it! He said he had a cat story he wanted to share with Art. Art said he would have to tell him (the robot) before he could tell the story to Art. The guy got offended and said he didn't think it was right to have to talk to a machine instead of Art. It went back and forth for a while but eventually Art had had enough. He yelled, "PROCEED WITH YOUR CAT STORY!"

So the guy told the story, which if I remember was that his cat had an unusual talent. The cat would lie on its back and reach its paws up under the refrigerator, where it had apparently put a rubber band to strum on, and the cat would play some sort of music under the fridge. Art asked if the guy had ever seen the cat do this and he said no, he just assumed that's what it was since there was no other explanation.

So the guy's fridge is making a weird noise and he immediately comes to the most ridiculous conclusion! He was definitely stoned. Me and my friend found it so funny that we made up a version for my cat. When he went outside he might be gone for a couple hours. So I concluded he was a tap-dancing cat and would perform at a small local theater under the name Mr. Sparkles. I mean, the cat was gone, so what other conclusion could I draw? I never bothered to see my cat perform, I just knew he did it.

Anyway, this is probably my best open lines memory. Does anyone have audio of this? I want to hear it again SO bad!
I also want to hear this episode? Any dates or guest info, anybody? Because sounds hilarious. I love my radio station because the AM and FM are same call letters and frequent (tho less so these days) callers who call into the wrong station. So you get old ladies or farmers ranting about politics on the FM and stoned dudes calling on the talk show. Sometimes the hosts play with them and it is great. BTW: Dave on his version of C2C did this a while back with a caller and claimed that he and even staff were robots- so in keeping with him copying stuff.

thoughtcrime

I heard the episode as a Streamlink/Coast Insider member in 2008. It was one of the "classic" episodes that they let you hear sometimes. I don't know when the original episode is from.

albrecht

Quote from: thoughtcrime on October 16, 2015, 08:01:07 PM
I heard the episode as a Streamlink/Coast Insider member in 2008. It was one of the "classic" episodes that they let you hear sometimes. I don't know when the original episode is from.
SIT archives are out there but need a date or guest or some trail to follow to peg down. Anyone?

Robert

People tend to think I'm a machine when I answer the phone.  I'm not sure why.  Maybe I'm too polite.  Or impolite.  Maybe I'm too close to the phone, so answer too quickly.  Maybe my delivery is just too good, so it sounds like a recording.

AppealPlay

Quote from: Robert on October 16, 2015, 08:39:24 PM
People tend to think I'm a machine when I answer the phone.  I'm not sure why.  Maybe I'm too polite.  Or impolite.  Maybe I'm too close to the phone, so answer too quickly.  Maybe my delivery is just too good, so it sounds like a recording.

You're so machine and you don't even know it.

thoughtcrime

It's not part of the SIT archives, or at least I don't think so. This was before SIT was even a thing. I remember it being in a list of "classic" episodes or something, and seeing that things didn't stay on the list for long, and hoping it would stay there but then suddenly it had cycled off the list. Not saying it didn't later air on SIT or return to the Coast site, but the time I saw it there I also saw it disappear.

thoughtcrime

I should also clarify that this episode was posted on their website in 2008, but that's not it's original air date. It was an old show, probably from the '90s.

albrecht

Quote from: thoughtcrime on October 16, 2015, 09:00:38 PM
I should also clarify that this episode was posted on their website in 2008, but that's not it's original air date. It was an old show, probably from the '90s.
Aside from the awesome AB archive the SIT, even know, is still giving up "new" shows, that are older and not contained in the archive. But hard to search around without some more info. Though I hope someone finds and good-luck searching!

thoughtcrime

Well, I'm looking at Somewhere in Time archives at www.coasttocoastam.com, and lots of the don't have links.

Take a look at this page for example:
http://www.coasttocoastam.com/show/2009/03/14/art

It just mentions the show date (7/29/98) and that it was time traveller open lines. I vaguely remember it being a themed open lines night, so I figured I'd start listening to some of those shows but they aren't actually there to listen.

Now, if there's a better archive somewhere, that might be worthwhile.

albrecht

Quote from: thoughtcrime on October 16, 2015, 09:09:47 PM
Well, I'm looking at Somewhere in Time archives at www.coasttocoastam.com, and lots of the don't have links.

Take a look at this page for example:
http://www.coasttocoastam.com/show/2009/03/14/art

It just mentions the show date (7/29/98) and that it was time traveller open lines. I vaguely remember it being a themed open lines night, so I figured I'd start listening to some of those shows but they aren't actually there to listen.

Now, if there's a better archive somewhere, that might be worthwhile.
If you look around on the interwebs there are some SIT archives in addition to the great torrent that is out there. Not that I encourage this type of thing.... ;)

thoughtcrime

I found a blog post referencing the show:

http://kaedrin.com/weblog/archive/000574.html

It provides an old link to where the file was on the old artbell.com (this blog post is from March 2001). The link is http://www.artbell.com/mediafiles/auto-artbell.ram which is no longer a valid link.

I tried the Internet Archive Wayback Machine (archive.org) to no avail. Art's site had a robots.txt file which prevented it from being archived. I was really hopeful for a second there.

albrecht

Quote from: thoughtcrime on October 16, 2015, 09:21:52 PM
I found a blog post referencing the show:

http://kaedrin.com/weblog/archive/000574.html

It provides an old link to where the file was on the old artbell.com (this blog post is from March 2001). The link is http://www.artbell.com/mediafiles/auto-artbell.ram which is no longer a valid link.

I tried the Internet Archive Wayback Machine (archive.org) to no avail. Art's site had a robots.txt file which prevented it from being archived. I was really hopeful for a second there.
Hmm have you searched the awesome torrent? This exchange almost seems to be going into the "feral human" show territory?!

thoughtcrime

Quote from: albrecht on October 16, 2015, 09:26:02 PM
Hmm have you searched the awesome torrent? This exchange almost seems to be going into the "feral human" show territory?!

I don't know how to do that. If anyone else does and wants to look, that would be great. My thought now is to try and email that blog's owner, and the other blog that she seems to thank for the link. *Maybe* they downloaded that show. Or, maybe one of us can call Art and ask if he remembers it. I might do that sometime on open lines, but not tonight.

311guy1

Quote from: thoughtcrime on October 16, 2015, 09:09:47 PM


It just mentions the show date (7/29/98) and that it was time traveller open lines. I vaguely remember it being a themed open lines night, so I figured I'd start listening to some of those shows but they aren't actually there to listen.



7/29/1998 is part of the definitive collection torrent. Just checked my C2C collection and it's in there. I'll have to give it a listen.

thoughtcrime

Great! Let me know what you find out.

Can anyone explain to me how to get Art Bell torrents? I did torrents once, a long time ago, but don't remember how. I think I need a special program and also some sort of link to where the torrents are.

311guy1

Quote from: thoughtcrime on October 20, 2015, 09:00:35 PM
Great! Let me know what you find out.

Can anyone explain to me how to get Art Bell torrents? I did torrents once, a long time ago, but don't remember how. I think I need a special program and also some sort of link to where the torrents are.

Download a program called uTorrent, go to piratebay and search art bell ultimate or something like that, and you should find the huge collection.

311guy1

Quote from: thoughtcrime on October 16, 2015, 09:35:09 PM
I don't know how to do that. If anyone else does and wants to look, that would be great. My thought now is to try and email that blog's owner, and the other blog that she seems to thank for the link. *Maybe* they downloaded that show. Or, maybe one of us can call Art and ask if he remembers it. I might do that sometime on open lines, but not tonight.

I listened to the show, I think it was the full 5-hour because the run time was 3:15. Didn't hear any cat story or art talking like a robot. He only had one caller who didn't realize he was talking to Art, and Art gave in and didn't lead in on for very long.

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