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Real Man Managers versus Those Type Managers

Started by Jojo, February 24, 2018, 01:44:44 AM

Jojo

Real Man Manager:  You're fired because you had a borderline bad call and the client was visiting monitoring calls.
One of Those Types Manager:  (Whispering).  I'm cutting her hours.  Did you hear how she talked to me?  She always dresses like that.  I know she steals soap from the break room!  She'll quit within the season, I guarantee it.  You just watch.

Real Man Manager:  You look nice today.
One of Those Types Managers:  (Mistaken) The dress code doesn't allow skirts.

Real Man Manager:  Job Aid: How to send a request to payroll.
One of Those Types Managers:  I'll call my cousin at the other branch and she'll bring it over here Friday when she picks up payroll.  I know she'll be here because she's coming to my place afterward to get the sweater she left last week.

Real Man Manager: See you Monday!
One of Those Types Managers:  Would you stay a minute and feed my bird?  It's in the back.  My husband took my pillow last night so I didn't sleep well and ran late so I brought the bird to work since I didn't have time to feed it.

Real Man Manager:  (Monitors visually at closing time to reduce employee theft).
One of Those Types Managers:  We know we get ripped off by employees.  Say, there are two employees that need a ride home, can you give them a ride?

Real Man Manager:  Here is a severance gift.
One of Those Types Managers:  The girls you've been giving rides home to say they don't like you so I just don't have any hours for you.  And please don't report us to the IRS, okay?

Real Man Manager:  No, you cannot leave early.
One of Those Types Managers (who happens to have really bad teeth and fear of dentists):  No, you cannot use any of your accrued paid time off for oral surgery.  What's your problem, are you afraid you're going to die?

Real Man Manager:  Employees need to wear their company vest.
One of Those Types Managers (who happens to be A-cup):  You have to wear a sweater over your sweater.  I just know I'm going to get complaints from the men that your sweater shows too much so cover up.

Real Man Manager:  If you fail that customer one more time, you are fired.
One of Those Types Managers:  My sister-in-law recovered from her disease so I no longer have to find her a place to live near the hospital, and I won't be commuting back and forth long distances taking care of her, so we don't need you anymore at all.  I'll even resume doing the weekend janitorial.  Thanks for praying for her.

Real Man Manager:  Even if hardly anyone was home, you should have gotten more small change in a nice neighborhood like that, just knocking on doors in the time that you had.
One of Those Types:  (At the door) Sure, Honey.  We'll donate.  I'm in the middle of giving my sister a perm.  If you'll just wait in the kitchen twenty minutes, my hands will be clean and I can give you some spare change then.

Real Man Manager:  You can stay an extra hour if you want.
One of Those Types Managers:  I don't care that my boss said you could stay an extra hour!  You usurped my authority!

Real Man Manager:  You may set your own hours.
One of Those Types Managers:. Well yes, we said you could set your own hours.  But I'm marking you down because you didn't set the same hours each week.  I'm sorry that wasn't clear to you.

Real Man Manager:  We hired someone else.
One of Those Types Managers:. I'm not going to hire you because I simply don't see how you could live on the wages.

Real Man Manager:  This is a temp job.
One of Those Types Managers (interviewing for a temp job):  Gee, ew it looks like you have a lot of temp jobs on your resume.

Real Man Manager:  We always need the social security number.
One of Those Types Managers:  Just put all zeros for the SSN if the client is upset, because this week we need more clients.

Real Man Manager:  (No comment).
One of Those Types Managers:  Why did you file unemployment?  I have to pay for that, you know!  Do you have the same boyfriend?

Real Man Manager:  Get a Dr.'s note.
One of Those Types Managers:  What illness could you possibly have that would render you needing an accommodation!

Real Man Manager:  You missed that class so I lowered your score.
One of Those Types Managers:  You missed that class, and boy I am livid, blah, blah, blah, blah so I almost lowered your score but since it is near the end of that campaign I decided to let you keep your score but I'm never getting over it.

Real Man Manager:  I need the keys to the money safe.
One of Those Types Managers:  Oh, for crap's sake, where did YOU put the %#!? is the $48, what have you done with it.  You are so awful.  The director is going to fire you.

Real Man Manager:  Lock up the patient data when you leave your desk.
One of Those Types Managers:  Don't sit in here with us (a clique).  Use the lobby desk.  Just put the patient data in the drawer when you leave.  On second thought, take it upstairs.  Someone can bring it back on their way down.  When is your next work day?  You could leave it upstairs and bring it down when you arrive. If someone in here needs it in the meanwhile, they can go upstairs and find it.  Just put it at Reception.  But for the foreseeable future, use the desk in the lobby.  Eventually we will get you a desk key for that lobby desk.

Real Man Manager:  Page the kitchen on the overhead to call you.
One of Those Types Managers:  Don't contact the kitchen staff downstairs when items run out.  They don't have a way to receive phone calls and they don't read email.  If you contact them, their manager will think they aren't doing their job.  The lead has worked here a long time and knows what he is doing.

Real Man Manager:  This is John from security.  Did client X leave the building?
One of Those Types Managers (On Phone):  Call me when client X leaves the building.  (Me:  Who are you?)
One of Those Types Managers:  I'm the lady you just talked to, wearing a grey t-shirt.
(Later on Phone)
One of Those Types Managers:  (Angry) Why didn't you call me when client X left the building!
(Me:  What color is your T-shirt?)
One of Those Types Managers:  Grey!
(Me:  Because client X is still in the building.)

Real Man Manager:  The interior carbon dioxide reading is high.
One of Those Types Managers:  We've had a long-standing air quality complaint from that department, but I know there is no issue.  If the air was bad by the dry ice, I would SMELL it.  I have the best nose in the world and I've worked here in environmental health services for thirty years!

Real Man Manager:  I'll let you know if you get the new position.
One of Those Types Managers:  How come you never wore that skirt again,  that you wore to the interview?

Real Man Manager:  Do you have a back up copy?
One of Those Types Managers:  You are in so much trouble.  Your work was found in the basement destroyed!  You are in big trouble!

Real Man Manager:  Please attend the holiday dinner.
One of Those Types Managers: I will take 30 minutes out of my busy, frowning day to rush a couple of the girls down to Super Restaurant for the holiday, into one of the windowless isolated banquet rooms at dinner time, for appetizers and water.  We will be back in time to get our work done.

Real Man Manager:  Your shirt will take three weeks to order.
One of Those Types Managers:  We can't hire you because our shirts don't fit you.  You could shop around town for something similar, but the color is hard to find this time of year.

Real Man Manager:  Do not wear denim to that branch again.
One of Those Types Managers:  This is your annual review.  Eight months ago when you visited that branch, the manager claims you wore denim that day so you aren't going to get a raise this year.

(Me:  What is the daily dress code?)
One of Those Types Managers:  The clothes you wore for the job interview would be great!

Real Man Manager:  Good night!  Thanks for all the overtime!
One of Those Types Managers:  You were one minute late to work this morning.

Real Man Manager:  Lock up the cash when you leave (public agency).
One of Those Type Managers:  We caught the janitor stealing from the cash box in the cupboard at night.  Yes, we suspected it was him and this is a public agency.  So we bought a camera system, paid for it's installation, and caught the guy!  No, it hadn't been locked...

Real Man Manager:  Here are the cash handling guidelines.
One of Those Types Managers:. Don't ring up transactions.  Just credit the account on the computer.  Set the money near the register but don't use the register because it is noisy.  We don't want to remind patrons that they sometimes have to pay.  The manager will ring it all up at once later.

Real Man Manager:  Close the shop.
One of Those Types Managers:  Payday?  PAY you??  I told you guys we would talk about that after I get back from my trip to the beach.  What are you doing bothering me on my vacation!  If you close the shop, I will fire you!

Real Man Manager:  She is going to a random drug test today.
One of Those Types Managers:. Now that you don't work here anymore, would you please tell HR she drinks on the job?  She never knows what she is doing.  It makes it hard for everyone.

Real Man Manager:  Your exchange has been accepted.
One of Those Types Managers:  No, I'm not accepting your major franchise exchange because it's from the other store.  If you return it here, I have to drive it back to the other store the next time I am there.  You should return it there.

Real Man Manager:  Email:  The position is filled.
One of Those Types Managers:  Email:  Actually, I don't have an opening after all but I gave your application to my sister, who runs a (yucky) business.  Maybe we will be hiring later.  Thanks!
(Later) Uh, how come you never called my sister?  You know, you applied here and we had actually forwarded your application over to her.  She was expecting to hear from you!

Real Man Manager:  We each bring our own food.
One of Those Types Managers:  There is some in the fridge.  I don't know whose it is, but I had some and I'm sure you can, too.


Dr. MD MD

Quote from: Jojo on February 24, 2018, 01:44:44 AM
Real Man Manager:  You're fired because you had a borderline bad call and the client was visiting monitoring calls.
One of Those Types Manager:  (Whispering).  I'm cutting her hours.  Did you hear how she talked to me?  She always dresses like that.  I know she steals soap from the break room!  She'll quit within the season, I guarantee it.  You just watch.

Real Man Manager:  You look nice today.
One of Those Types Managers:  (Mistaken) The dress code doesn't allow skirts.

Real Man Manager:  Job Aid: How to send a request to payroll.
One of Those Types Managers:  I'll call my cousin at the other branch and she'll bring it over here Friday when she picks up payroll.  I know she'll be here because she's coming to my place afterward to get the sweater she left last week.

Real Man Manager: See you Monday!
One of Those Types Managers:  Would you stay a minute and feed my bird?  It's in the back.  My husband took my pillow last night so I didn't sleep well and ran late so I brought the bird to work since I didn't have time to feed it.

Real Man Manager:  (Monitors visually at closing time to reduce employee theft).
One of Those Types Managers:  We know we get ripped off by employees.  Say, there are two employees that need a ride home, can you give them a ride?

Real Man Manager:  Here is a severance gift.
One of Those Types Managers:  The girls you've been giving rides home to say they don't like you so I just don't have any hours for you.  And please don't report us to the IRS, okay?

Real Man Manager:  No, you cannot leave early.
One of Those Types Managers (who happens to have really bad teeth and fear of dentists):  No, you cannot use any of your accrued paid time off for oral surgery.  What's your problem, are you afraid you're going to die?

Real Man Manager:  Employees need to wear their company vest.
One of Those Types Managers (who happens to be A-cup):  You have to wear a sweater over your sweater.  I just know I'm going to get complaints from the men that your sweater shows too much so cover up.

Real Man Manager:  If you fail that customer one more time, you are fired.
One of Those Types Managers:  My sister-in-law recovered from her disease so I no longer have to find her a place to live near the hospital, and I won't be commuting back and forth long distances taking care of her, so we don't need you anymore at all.  I'll even resume doing the weekend janitorial.  Thanks for praying for her.

Real Man Manager:  Even if hardly anyone was home, you should have gotten more small change in a nice neighborhood like that, just knocking on doors in the time that you had.
One of Those Types:  (At the door) Sure, Honey.  We'll donate.  I'm in the middle of giving my sister a perm.  If you'll just wait in the kitchen twenty minutes, my hands will be clean and I can give you some spare change then.

Real Man Manager:  You can stay an extra hour if you want.
One of Those Types Managers:  I don't care that my boss said you could stay an extra hour!  You usurped my authority!

Real Man Manager:  You may set your own hours.
One of Those Types Managers:. Well yes, we said you could set your own hours.  But I'm marking you down because you didn't set the same hours each week.  I'm sorry that wasn't clear to you.

Real Man Manager:  We hired someone else.
One of Those Types Managers:. I'm not going to hire you because I simply don't see how you could live on the wages.

Real Man Manager:  This is a temp job.
One of Those Types Managers (interviewing for a temp job):  Gee, ew it looks like you have a lot of temp jobs on your resume.

Real Man Manager:  We always need the social security number.
One of Those Types Managers:  Just put all zeros for the SSN if the client is upset, because this week we need more clients.

Real Man Manager:  (No comment).
One of Those Types Managers:  Why did you file unemployment?  I have to pay for that, you know!  Do you have the same boyfriend?

Real Man Manager:  Get a Dr.'s note.
One of Those Types Managers:  What illness could you possibly have that would render you needing an accommodation!

Real Man Manager:  You missed that class so I lowered your score.
One of Those Types Managers:  You missed that class, and boy I am livid, blah, blah, blah, blah so I almost lowered your score but since it is near the end of that campaign I decided to let you keep your score but I'm never getting over it.

Real Man Manager:  I need the keys to the money safe.
One of Those Types Managers:  Oh, for crap's sake, where did YOU put the %#!? is the $48, what have you done with it.  You are so awful.  The director is going to fire you.

Real Man Manager:  Lock up the patient data when you leave your desk.
One of Those Types Managers:  Don't sit in here with us (a clique).  Use the lobby desk.  Just put the patient data in the drawer when you leave.  On second thought, take it upstairs.  Someone can bring it back on their way down.  When is your next work day?  You could leave it upstairs and bring it down when you arrive. If someone in here needs it in the meanwhile, they can go upstairs and find it.  Just put it at Reception.  But for the foreseeable future, use the desk in the lobby.  Eventually we will get you a desk key for that lobby desk.

Real Man Manager:  Page the kitchen on the overhead to call you.
One of Those Types Managers:  Don't contact the kitchen staff downstairs when items run out.  They don't have a way to receive phone calls and they don't read email.  If you contact them, their manager will think they aren't doing their job.  The lead has worked here a long time and knows what he is doing.

Real Man Manager:  This is John from security.  Did client X leave the building?
One of Those Types Managers (On Phone):  Call me when client X leaves the building.  (Me:  Who are you?)
One of Those Types Managers:  I'm the lady you just talked to, wearing a grey t-shirt.
(Later on Phone)
One of Those Types Managers:  (Angry) Why didn't you call me when client X left the building!
(Me:  What color is your T-shirt?)
One of Those Types Managers:  Grey!
(Me:  Because client X is still in the building.)

Real Man Manager:  The interior carbon dioxide reading is high.
One of Those Types Managers:  We've had a long-standing air quality complaint from that department, but I know there is no issue.  If the air was bad by the dry ice, I would SMELL it.  I have the best nose in the world and I've worked here in environmental health services for thirty years!

Real Man Manager:  I'll let you know if you get the new position.
One of Those Types Managers:  How come you never wore that skirt again,  that you wore to the interview?

Real Man Manager:  Do you have a back up copy?
One of Those Types Managers:  You are in so much trouble.  Your work was found in the basement destroyed!  You are in big trouble!

Real Man Manager:  Please attend the holiday dinner.
One of Those Types Managers: I will take 30 minutes out of my busy, frowning day to rush a couple of the girls down to Super Restaurant for the holiday, into one of the windowless isolated banquet rooms at dinner time, for appetizers and water.  We will be back in time to get our work done.

Real Man Manager:  Your shirt will take three weeks to order.
One of Those Types Managers:  We can't hire you because our shirts don't fit you.  You could shop around town for something similar, but the color is hard to find this time of year.

Real Man Manager:  Do not wear denim to that branch again.
One of Those Types Managers:  This is your annual review.  Eight months ago when you visited that branch, the manager claims you wore denim that day so you aren't going to get a raise this year.

(Me:  What is the daily dress code?)
One of Those Types Managers:  The clothes you wore for the job interview would be great!

Real Man Manager:  Good night!  Thanks for all the overtime!
One of Those Types Managers:  You were one minute late to work this morning.

Real Man Manager:  Lock up the cash when you leave (public agency).
One of Those Type Managers:  We caught the janitor stealing from the cash box in the cupboard at night.  Yes, we suspected it was him and this is a public agency.  So we bought a camera system, paid for it's installation, and caught the guy!  No, it hadn't been locked...

Real Man Manager:  Here are the cash handling guidelines.
One of Those Types Managers:. Don't ring up transactions.  Just credit the account on the computer.  Set the money near the register but don't use the register because it is noisy.  We don't want to remind patrons that they sometimes have to pay.  The manager will ring it all up at once later.

Real Man Manager:  Close the shop.
One of Those Types Managers:  Payday?  PAY you??  I told you guys we would talk about that after I get back from my trip to the beach.  What are you doing bothering me on my vacation!  If you close the shop, I will fire you!

Real Man Manager:  She is going to a random drug test today.
One of Those Types Managers:. Now that you don't work here anymore, would you please tell HR she drinks on the job?  She never knows what she is doing.  It makes it hard for everyone.

Real Man Manager:  Your exchange has been accepted.
One of Those Types Managers:  No, I'm not accepting your major franchise exchange because it's from the other store.  If you return it here, I have to drive it back to the other store the next time I am there.  You should return it there.

Real Man Manager:  Email:  The position is filled.
One of Those Types Managers:  Email:  Actually, I don't have an opening after all but I gave your application to my sister, who runs a (yucky) business.  Maybe we will be hiring later.  Thanks!
(Later) Uh, how come you never called my sister?  You know, you applied here and we had actually forwarded your application over to her.  She was expecting to hear from you!

Real Man Manager:  We each bring our own food.
One of Those Types Managers:  There is some in the fridge.  I don't know whose it is, but I had some and I'm sure you can, too.

Oh, you got it down, baby! Screenplay time! All the critics will call it a modern day 9 to 5 but with a bitchy woman as the boss instead. It's right for today! You're so money! 8)

paladin1991

Quote from: Jojo on February 24, 2018, 01:44:44 AM
Real Man Manager:  You're fired because you had a borderline bad call and the client was visiting monitoring calls.
One of Those Types Manager:  (Whispering).  I'm cutting her hours.  Did you hear how she talked to me?  She always dresses like that.  I know she steals soap from the break room!  She'll quit within the season, I guarantee it.  You just watch.

Real Man Manager:  You look nice today.
One of Those Types Managers:  (Mistaken) The dress code doesn't allow skirts.

Real Man Manager:  Job Aid: How to send a request to payroll.
One of Those Types Managers:  I'll call my cousin at the other branch and she'll bring it over here Friday when she picks up payroll.  I know she'll be here because she's coming to my place afterward to get the sweater she left last week.

Real Man Manager: See you Monday!
One of Those Types Managers:  Would you stay a minute and feed my bird?  It's in the back.  My husband took my pillow last night so I didn't sleep well and ran late so I brought the bird to work since I didn't have time to feed it.

Real Man Manager:  (Monitors visually at closing time to reduce employee theft).
One of Those Types Managers:  We know we get ripped off by employees.  Say, there are two employees that need a ride home, can you give them a ride?

Real Man Manager:  Here is a severance gift.
One of Those Types Managers:  The girls you've been giving rides home to say they don't like you so I just don't have any hours for you.  And please don't report us to the IRS, okay?

Real Man Manager:  No, you cannot leave early.
One of Those Types Managers (who happens to have really bad teeth and fear of dentists):  No, you cannot use any of your accrued paid time off for oral surgery.  What's your problem, are you afraid you're going to die?

Real Man Manager:  Employees need to wear their company vest.
One of Those Types Managers (who happens to be A-cup):  You have to wear a sweater over your sweater.  I just know I'm going to get complaints from the men that your sweater shows too much so cover up.

Real Man Manager:  If you fail that customer one more time, you are fired.
One of Those Types Managers:  My sister-in-law recovered from her disease so I no longer have to find her a place to live near the hospital, and I won't be commuting back and forth long distances taking care of her, so we don't need you anymore at all.  I'll even resume doing the weekend janitorial.  Thanks for praying for her.

Real Man Manager:  Even if hardly anyone was home, you should have gotten more small change in a nice neighborhood like that, just knocking on doors in the time that you had.
One of Those Types:  (At the door) Sure, Honey.  We'll donate.  I'm in the middle of giving my sister a perm.  If you'll just wait in the kitchen twenty minutes, my hands will be clean and I can give you some spare change then.

Real Man Manager:  You can stay an extra hour if you want.
One of Those Types Managers:  I don't care that my boss said you could stay an extra hour!  You usurped my authority!

Real Man Manager:  You may set your own hours.
One of Those Types Managers:. Well yes, we said you could set your own hours.  But I'm marking you down because you didn't set the same hours each week.  I'm sorry that wasn't clear to you.

Real Man Manager:  We hired someone else.
One of Those Types Managers:. I'm not going to hire you because I simply don't see how you could live on the wages.

Real Man Manager:  This is a temp job.
One of Those Types Managers (interviewing for a temp job):  Gee, ew it looks like you have a lot of temp jobs on your resume.

Real Man Manager:  We always need the social security number.
One of Those Types Managers:  Just put all zeros for the SSN if the client is upset, because this week we need more clients.

Real Man Manager:  (No comment).
One of Those Types Managers:  Why did you file unemployment?  I have to pay for that, you know!  Do you have the same boyfriend?

Real Man Manager:  Get a Dr.'s note.
One of Those Types Managers:  What illness could you possibly have that would render you needing an accommodation!

Real Man Manager:  You missed that class so I lowered your score.
One of Those Types Managers:  You missed that class, and boy I am livid, blah, blah, blah, blah so I almost lowered your score but since it is near the end of that campaign I decided to let you keep your score but I'm never getting over it.

Real Man Manager:  I need the keys to the money safe.
One of Those Types Managers:  Oh, for crap's sake, where did YOU put the %#!? is the $48, what have you done with it.  You are so awful.  The director is going to fire you.

Real Man Manager:  Lock up the patient data when you leave your desk.
One of Those Types Managers:  Don't sit in here with us (a clique).  Use the lobby desk.  Just put the patient data in the drawer when you leave.  On second thought, take it upstairs.  Someone can bring it back on their way down.  When is your next work day?  You could leave it upstairs and bring it down when you arrive. If someone in here needs it in the meanwhile, they can go upstairs and find it.  Just put it at Reception.  But for the foreseeable future, use the desk in the lobby.  Eventually we will get you a desk key for that lobby desk.

Real Man Manager:  Page the kitchen on the overhead to call you.
One of Those Types Managers:  Don't contact the kitchen staff downstairs when items run out.  They don't have a way to receive phone calls and they don't read email.  If you contact them, their manager will think they aren't doing their job.  The lead has worked here a long time and knows what he is doing.

Real Man Manager:  This is John from security.  Did client X leave the building?
One of Those Types Managers (On Phone):  Call me when client X leaves the building.  (Me:  Who are you?)
One of Those Types Managers:  I'm the lady you just talked to, wearing a grey t-shirt.
(Later on Phone)
One of Those Types Managers:  (Angry) Why didn't you call me when client X left the building!
(Me:  What color is your T-shirt?)
One of Those Types Managers:  Grey!
(Me:  Because client X is still in the building.)

Real Man Manager:  The interior carbon dioxide reading is high.
One of Those Types Managers:  We've had a long-standing air quality complaint from that department, but I know there is no issue.  If the air was bad by the dry ice, I would SMELL it.  I have the best nose in the world and I've worked here in environmental health services for thirty years!

Real Man Manager:  I'll let you know if you get the new position.
One of Those Types Managers:  How come you never wore that skirt again,  that you wore to the interview?

Real Man Manager:  Do you have a back up copy?
One of Those Types Managers:  You are in so much trouble.  Your work was found in the basement destroyed!  You are in big trouble!

Real Man Manager:  Please attend the holiday dinner.
One of Those Types Managers: I will take 30 minutes out of my busy, frowning day to rush a couple of the girls down to Super Restaurant for the holiday, into one of the windowless isolated banquet rooms at dinner time, for appetizers and water.  We will be back in time to get our work done.

Real Man Manager:  Your shirt will take three weeks to order.
One of Those Types Managers:  We can't hire you because our shirts don't fit you.  You could shop around town for something similar, but the color is hard to find this time of year.

Real Man Manager:  Do not wear denim to that branch again.
One of Those Types Managers:  This is your annual review.  Eight months ago when you visited that branch, the manager claims you wore denim that day so you aren't going to get a raise this year.

(Me:  What is the daily dress code?)
One of Those Types Managers:  The clothes you wore for the job interview would be great!

Real Man Manager:  Good night!  Thanks for all the overtime!
One of Those Types Managers:  You were one minute late to work this morning.

Real Man Manager:  Lock up the cash when you leave (public agency).
One of Those Type Managers:  We caught the janitor stealing from the cash box in the cupboard at night.  Yes, we suspected it was him and this is a public agency.  So we bought a camera system, paid for it's installation, and caught the guy!  No, it hadn't been locked...

Real Man Manager:  Here are the cash handling guidelines.
One of Those Types Managers:. Don't ring up transactions.  Just credit the account on the computer.  Set the money near the register but don't use the register because it is noisy.  We don't want to remind patrons that they sometimes have to pay.  The manager will ring it all up at once later.

Real Man Manager:  Close the shop.
One of Those Types Managers:  Payday?  PAY you??  I told you guys we would talk about that after I get back from my trip to the beach.  What are you doing bothering me on my vacation!  If you close the shop, I will fire you!

Real Man Manager:  She is going to a random drug test today.
One of Those Types Managers:. Now that you don't work here anymore, would you please tell HR she drinks on the job?  She never knows what she is doing.  It makes it hard for everyone.

Real Man Manager:  Your exchange has been accepted.
One of Those Types Managers:  No, I'm not accepting your major franchise exchange because it's from the other store.  If you return it here, I have to drive it back to the other store the next time I am there.  You should return it there.

Real Man Manager:  Email:  The position is filled.
One of Those Types Managers:  Email:  Actually, I don't have an opening after all but I gave your application to my sister, who runs a (yucky) business.  Maybe we will be hiring later.  Thanks!
(Later) Uh, how come you never called my sister?  You know, you applied here and we had actually forwarded your application over to her.  She was expecting to hear from you!

Real Man Manager:  We each bring our own food.
One of Those Types Managers:  There is some in the fridge.  I don't know whose it is, but I had some and I'm sure you can, too.

SloJo, come on baby.  It must be past time for your meds.  Drink this thorazine cocktail.  You won't remember today.

Jojo

These are real anecdotes.  Love 'em or leave 'em.

Dr. MD MD

Quote from: Jojo on February 24, 2018, 03:18:05 AM
These are real anecdotes.  Love 'em or leave 'em.

That's what I'm saying! You have an astute eye for the absurd. You should develop it. Seriously. ;)

A lot of great writers are just good at documenting such anecdotes and then connecting them in their imiagination somehow:

In a 1977 conversation with The Paris Review, Vonnegut admitted to swiping a few traits directly from the real Langmuir for his novel. “Langmuir was wonderfully absentminded,” Vonnegut said. “He wondered out loud one time whether, when turtles pulled in their heads, their spines buckled or contracted. I put that in the book. One time he left a tip under his plate after his wife served him breakfast at home. I put that in.”

Jojo

Quote from: Dr. MD MD on February 24, 2018, 03:20:06 AM
That's what I'm saying! You have an astute eye for the absurd. You should develop it. Seriously. ;)

A lot of great writers are just good at documenting such anecdotes and then connecting them in their imiagination somehow:

In a 1977 conversation with The Paris Review, Vonnegut admitted to swiping a few traits directly from the real Langmuir for his novel. “Langmuir was wonderfully absentminded,” Vonnegut said. “He wondered out loud one time whether, when turtles pulled in their heads, their spines buckled or contracted. I put that in the book. One time he left a tip under his plate after his wife served him breakfast at home. I put that in.”
That's hilarious.  Usually I follow the Noory but this week it was the work force.

I gave it all away.  A white elephant for MV.

Dr. MD MD

Quote from: Jojo on February 24, 2018, 04:00:36 PM
That's hilarious.  Usually I follow the Noory but this week it was the work force.

I gave it all away.  A white elephant for MV.

That'll be for the courts to decide. Just do it!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXojME_NC0U


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