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Random stupid things on your mind. Post them.

Started by timpate, September 20, 2010, 07:56:24 PM

gnooryblows

Quote from: 21st Century Man on December 20, 2017, 11:22:57 PM
Seems like he could make some money with that serpent.  Of course, he probably has erectile dysfunction.  LOL. Stretching it with weights might be the cause of that little problem.

HARD UP ...Man with world’s largest penis is now registered disabled because his 18inch member is so big… but he refuses to get a reduction

https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/5180952/man-with-worlds-largest-penis-is-now-registered-disabled-because-his-18inch-member-is-so-big-but-he-refuses-to-get-a-reduction/


DEMONCRATS WANT HIM TO MOVE TO THE US WHERE YOUR TAX DOLLARS CAN SUBSIDIZE HIS MASSIVE SCHLONG

akwilly

Quote from: 21st Century Man on December 20, 2017, 11:22:57 PM
Seems like he could make some money with that serpent.  Of course, he probably has erectile dysfunction.  LOL. Stretching it with weights might be the cause of that little problem.

HARD UP ...Man with world’s largest penis is now registered disabled because his 18inch member is so big… but he refuses to get a reduction

https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/5180952/man-with-worlds-largest-penis-is-now-registered-disabled-because-his-18inch-member-is-so-big-but-he-refuses-to-get-a-reduction/
it seems his girlfriend should be the one claiming disability......Assuming she's not Asian

Quote from: akwilly on December 20, 2017, 11:54:12 PM
it seems his girlfriend should be the one claiming disability......Assuming she's not Asian


LOL, that and if she breaks up with him, she'll never be satisfied again.


Nice to see you, akwilly.
Have a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!  ;)

Swishypants

Don't tell MD this, he'll get jealous and give the dude head just to try and bite off a chunk for himself!

bateman




I have always, always hated this fucking guy

Quote from: bateman on December 21, 2017, 04:30:11 PM
I have always, always hated this fucking guy

He gets a NoblePrize in economics, then turns into a shit-writing political columnist..

Someone:  ''He got a Nobel Prize in economics''

Me:  ''Yeah, about international trade and customer's preferences for diversity in available products, but that isn't what this column is about''



Will be leaving soon to go over to spend the evening with a friend of Mrs. Walks_At_Night. 
We were invited at the last second.  I feigned a pain in my liver but it didn't work.    :'(

ShayP

Quote from: Walks_At_Night on December 24, 2017, 04:48:32 PM
Will be leaving soon to go over to spend the evening with a friend of Mrs. Walks_At_Night. 
We were invited at the last second.  I feigned a pain in my liver but it didn't work.    :'(

Always choose diarrhea as an excuse.  If your wife doesn't believe you just say "Hey Honey, look at this.  100% success rate."  :D

chefist

Merry Xmas and Happy New Year Everyone! Hope Santa brought you what you desired!

Chefist

albrecht

Quote from: Walks_At_Night on December 24, 2017, 04:48:32 PM
Will be leaving soon to go over to spend the evening with a friend of Mrs. Walks_At_Night. 
We were invited at the last second.  I feigned a pain in my liver but it didn't work.    :'(
The obvious solution is to swill enough eggnogg, wine,and spirits that your liver will really hurt. Then after, spilling drinks or knocking something over, telling ribald and inappropriate jokes, making sweeping and brash political statements, and openly- but drunkenly,  hitting on various females in attendance, and tearful apologies and leaving you will likely not be invited back next time (warning this could also get you in the doghouse with Mrs.WAN.)

Quote from: albrecht on December 24, 2017, 10:28:41 PM
The obvious solution is to swill enough eggnogg, wine,and spirits that your liver will really hurt. Then after, spilling drinks or knocking something over, telling ribald and inappropriate jokes, making sweeping and brash political statements, and openly- but drunkenly,  hitting on various females in attendance, and tearful apologies and leaving you will likely not be invited back next time (warning this could also get you in the doghouse with Mrs.WAN.)

As with ShayP's diarrhea ploy, this is fairly solid advice.  It was a weird enough evening - maybe I should have worked harder to wriggle out of it. 

The hosts of the party have a daughter  that has finished college and is applying to various Medical Schools.  A very bright, attractive, intelligent young lady - one whom any parent would be proud of.   Thing is she was wearing this really, really, low cut outfit, with no brassiere and these fishnet stripper-like stockings.   She kept bending over the whole evening and everyone saw a absolutely everything there was to see on multiple occasions. 

Weird.   

Mrs. WAN and I get in the car at the end of the evening, she looks at me and says "What's up with that? Why was A______ dressed like a sl*t?"   I just about busted a gut laughing.  I've been married to Mrs. WAN for over 24 years, I've known her for 26 and I've never heard her use that word before.  No, I didn't get Senda twitchy but there somethings you can't just not see.
So I got to hear all about the situation on the whole way home.  Mrs. WAN was in rare form.  "Who dresses like that at a Christmas party?  Who dresses like that in front of their Parents? Why would a Father allow his daughter to dress like that?  You wouldn't allow little WAN to dress like that, why would he?" On and On it went.  I had no answers for her..........

Taaroa


QuoteNot everyone was enjoying themselves.

"No, it's been a horrible day," said one despondent shopper. "Bloody kids talked me into it and they've been little bastards all day."

Another shopper, when asked if he was having a good time doing his Christmas shopping, said "f--- off" and declined to give his name.

http://www.theage.com.au/victoria/thousands-cram-into-melbourne-shopping-centres-for-lastminute-christmas-gifts-20171223-h09qyr.html

:D

Jojo

Quote from: Walks_At_Night on December 24, 2017, 11:01:14 PM
As with ShayP's diarrhea ploy, this is fairly solid advice.  It was a weird enough evening - maybe I should have worked harder to wriggle out of it. 

The hosts of the party have a daughter  that has finished college and is applying to various Medical Schools.  A very bright, attractive, intelligent young lady - one whom any parent would be proud of.   Thing is she was wearing this really, really, low cut outfit, with no brassiere and these fishnet stripper-like stockings.   She kept bending over the whole evening and everyone saw a absolutely everything there was to see on multiple occasions. 

Weird.   

Mrs. WAN and I get in the car at the end of the evening, she looks at me and says "What's up with that? Why was A______ dressed like a sl*t?"   I just about busted a gut laughing.  I've been married to Mrs. WAN for over 24 years, I've known her for 26 and I've never heard her use that word before.  No, I didn't get Senda twitchy but there somethings you can't just not see.
So I got to hear all about the situation on the whole way home.  Mrs. WAN was in rare form.  "Who dresses like that at a Christmas party?  Who dresses like that in front of their Parents? Why would a Father allow his daughter to dress like that?  You wouldn't allow little WAN to dress like that, why would he?" On and On it went.  I had no answers for her..........
Mr. WAN, Let me assure you, you did exactly the right thing by keeping quiet for the most part and just agreeing.  You are a wise man.  You are also very lucky, to have a wife who is selective in her rants.  What a lucky man you are.

It's good you were quiet.  Anything you said can and would be held mostly against you.  These kinds of pains are very deep for a good woman, when another women acts seductive (knowingly or unknowingly) in front of our man.  It cuts us to the bone.  Breaks us up.  We don't get over it very well.  Good women just can't take these things.  Me personally, I couldn't even watch TV with my partner, because the women's roles are so sexualized. 

I wonder if the girl has incest in her family, that they allowed such behavior to be "normalized".

Jojo

Quote from: Swishypants on December 20, 2017, 06:43:35 PM
MEANWHILE...

That face you get when you see photos of your older friends "once young & hot" daughters with their new babies. Why is it that babies knock the hot right the fuck out of once pretty females? Baby kicked that pussy wide open and yanked out anything that made them look feminine in one deft motion! Clean my shit spattered toilet Workhorse!


You are wrong.  Women with babies have engorged breasts and a better hip to waist ratio.
If you think young women starting families are ugly, I'd hate to hear what you think of women who are NO longer fertile!


whoozit

I’m in Vegas for a bit and am considering driving around Mount Charleston and setting off some firecrackers.

Quote from: Jojo on December 25, 2017, 02:00:32 AM
Mr. WAN, Let me assure you, you did exactly the right thing by keeping quiet for the most part and just agreeing.  You are a wise man.  You are also very lucky, to have a wife who is selective in her rants.  What a lucky man you are.

It's good you were quiet.  Anything you said can and would be held mostly against you.  These kinds of pains are very deep for a good woman, when another women acts seductive (knowingly or unknowingly) in front of our man.  It cuts us to the bone.  Breaks us up.  We don't get over it very well.  Good women just can't take these things.  Me personally, I couldn't even watch TV with my partner, because the women's roles are so sexualized. 

I wonder if the girl has incest in her family, that they allowed such behavior to be "normalized".

I am unbelievably lucky!   Mrs. WAN is one hell of a lady. 

It was a weird situation for sure

Quote from: Walks_At_Night on December 24, 2017, 11:01:14 PM
...   Thing is she was wearing this really, really, low cut outfit, with no brassiere and these fishnet stripper-like stockings.   She kept bending over the whole evening and everyone saw a absolutely everything there was to see on multiple occasions...

And you didn't want to go

albrecht

This really helps explain the rules? "For air transportation" but then, in bold, "must not, under any circumstances, be routed by air transportation."
http://faq.usps.com/?articleId=220684

"

       For air transportation, each mailpiece must:

            Bear a Class 9 DOT miscellaneous hazardous material warning label
      Be clearly marked “Carbon Dioxide Solid, Or Dry Ice,
      Have a properly completed shipper's declaration for dangerous goods prepared in triplicate and affixed to the outside of the mailpiece

    For surface transportation, each mailpiece must be clearly marked either:

            â€œSurface Only” or
      “Surface Mail Only” and “Carbon Dioxide Solid, UN1845” or
      “Dry Ice, UN1845”

Note: must not, under any circumstances, be routed via air transportation."


GravitySucks

Quote from: albrecht on December 29, 2017, 08:30:21 PM
This really helps explain the rules? "For air transportation" but then, in bold, "must not, under any circumstances, be routed by air transportation."
http://faq.usps.com/?articleId=220684

"

       For air transportation, each mailpiece must:

            Bear a Class 9 DOT miscellaneous hazardous material warning label
      Be clearly marked “Carbon Dioxide Solid, Or Dry Ice,
      Have a properly completed shipper's declaration for dangerous goods prepared in triplicate and affixed to the outside of the mailpiece

    For surface transportation, each mailpiece must be clearly marked either:

            â€œSurface Only” or
      “Surface Mail Only” and “Carbon Dioxide Solid, UN1845” or
      “Dry Ice, UN1845”

Note: must not, under any circumstances, be routed via air transportation."

Reminds me of a flight delay I had at DIA. It was frigid and the battery was no good on the plane. They had to send a driver up to another airport to pick up a spare and drive it down... because the battery could not be flown as cargo. And once it arrived, they installed it on our plane. Go figure... 15 hour delay. Well, the last 2 hours were because the Steelers beat the Broncos and the ground crew trashed the airplane because we were headed to Pittsburgh. The aircrew refused to fly it until it was cleaned. They must have thrown 10-20 pounds of salt in the cabin. So much for deicing.

Jojo

Quote from: albrecht on December 29, 2017, 08:30:21 PM
This really helps explain the rules? "For air transportation" but then, in bold, "must not, under any circumstances, be routed by air transportation."
http://faq.usps.com/?articleId=220684

"

       For air transportation, each mailpiece must:

            Bear a Class 9 DOT miscellaneous hazardous material warning label
      Be clearly marked “Carbon Dioxide Solid, Or Dry Ice,
      Have a properly completed shipper's declaration for dangerous goods prepared in triplicate and affixed to the outside of the mailpiece

    For surface transportation, each mailpiece must be clearly marked either:

            â€œSurface Only” or
      “Surface Mail Only” and “Carbon Dioxide Solid, UN1845” or
      “Dry Ice, UN1845”

Note: must not, under any circumstances, be routed via air transportation."
Yeah.  I walked off a job where dry ice was stored, to keep specimens fresh during transport. I evacuated after gasping for breath, and later realized we hadn't evidently been ventilating dry ice right.  We had received way more dry ice all at once than usual on the day I began gasping.  Others in the dept thought we were being otherwise "poisoned".  The dept had a long-standing air quality complaint on file with the company environmental safety dept.  But, the safety dept. head merely maintained that there was no issue, because if there was, she would have "smelled it".  Wow.  Behind her back, I got maintenance to measure CO one day, a week before I had to walk out.  The CO reading came in high.  He seemed surprised, but I don't know why; we had all been complaining of labored breathing at desk jobs near dumpsters of dry ice.

Here is a sad, STUPID fatal workplace death from dry ice:
http://seriousinjurylawyers.com/dry_ice_kills_delivery_driver



Taaroa

I just watched drunken idiots fire illegal fireworks at a low flying plane.   :(

Happy New Year.

Swishypants

Quote from: Taaroa on December 31, 2017, 07:50:15 AM
I just watched drunken idiots fire illegal fireworks at a low flying plane.   :(

Happy New Year.

Enjoy these last few hours Gay-wides! MV is pulling the plug at 12:01 West Coast time! Fuck Hawaii!

Taaroa

Quote from: Swishypants on December 31, 2017, 07:53:12 AM
Enjoy these last few hours Gay-wides! MV is pulling the plug at 12:01 West Coast time! Fuck Hawaii!

It can't be helped.



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