George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[zeebo]

George tells Levine that he's been talking to Bob Dylan's son, Jessie, about trying to get Mr. Tambourine Man to "do the show."

Apparently George has recently become a fan of Bob Dylan.  Sure he's caught the wave a little late, like 4 or 5 decades late, but no worries.  Now that he's probably listened to Dylan's Greatist Hits Vol. 1 like once or twice, he's now an expert and I'm sure would do an awesome interview. 

[zeebo]

I can't imagine them being able to understand each other.  They'll need an interpreter just to translate Noorese into Dylan and back again.  Art could do it though.  He interviewed Willie Nelson quite adeptly, although Dylan makes Willie look like the most approachable man in the universe.

Maybe they could put Keith Richards or Ozzy Osbourne in the middle to translate, and we might just have a new language emerge.  Who knows, it might come out like Klingon or Dothraki.

[PB the Deplorable]

... (I've often wondered about the accuracy of the ratings and what they truly indicate; stats can be so misleading.)

For a program that supposedly has 3-5 million listeners each night (please correct me if that's wrong)...

There is a company called Arbitron that gathers data on listeners that is similar to the TV Nielsens.  They ask you to fill out a booklet for a certain period of time listing the dates and times a person has listened to the radio.  They project those results over the population as a whole.

The 3.5 million is cumulative listeners for a week, so about 700,000 a day for five days gets George to the 3.5m.  It's likely they are he same 700,000 each day for the most part.  Each listener could be listening to anywhere a few minutes to the whole show.  Even the number of listeners can be misleading - I would guess most of George's listeners are there for a segment or two per night, while Art's were there for the whole show.

I think when it seems like few are listening after the first hour or are calling in, that's probably right.  Commute hour drive time is where the listeners are, which is why they keep George Noory as far from that as possible.

[zeebo]

     I'd tune in for those uncomfortable mumbles and lapses of silence. Salvador Dali said the best form of communication is confusion, and that's what we'd get in spades. Noory has a lot of nerve to even suggest to have Dylan as a guest.

       "Did you work for a lady named Maggie? On a farm?"
        "Are you related to the Gunsmoke guy? He's good, do you Billy Mumy?"
        " Three Angels", "You Angel You"  you write about angels, Bob. Could it be angels?

Bob you wrote about "Subterranean Homesick Blues".  Were you writing about a civilization below the earth's crust?
In your song "Shooting Star", did that have anything to do with space travel, aliens, or maybe angels?
How come you don't do those old acoustic songs anymore, some of us old-fashioned guys like those, haha.

[ItsOver]

Maybe they could put Keith Richards or Ozzy Osbourne in the middle to translate, and we might just have a new language emerge.  Who knows, it might come out like Klingon or Dothraki.

Hahahah.... .   Snorry doing an Ozzy interview.  Now that would be a ride on a "Crazy Train."  Just throw FrankenWells in the middle of it to have the ultimate unintelligible train wreck.

[zeebo]

One less night of Noory and UFO Phil is always good.  You just have to be able to tolerate the semi-coherent rambling of Mary Jane Wells, stumbling around the deck of his "Mother Ship."  :

I basically like Wells even though his topics are a bit over-the-top gloom/doom for me.  However his ramblings sometimes have me rooting for him to finish a sentence where he's painted himself into a corner.  I'll be like "C'mon John, you can do it, you've almost got it ...." as he's sputtering his digressions and verbal vacillations.

[jinwicked]

"I don't always cover paranormal topics, but when I do, I prefer to suck at them too."

-- The Least Interesting Host in the World

Stay bored, my friends

I... I may need to steal this.

[hosehead]

I can't imagine them being able to understand each other.  They'll need an interpreter just to translate Noorese into Dylan and back again.

Old SNL skit:  http://www.hulu.com/watch/269962

Make sure you wait out til the halfway point...

[Meanandnasty]

I basically like Wells even though his topics are a bit over-the-top gloom/doom for me.  However his ramblings sometimes have me rooting for him to finish a sentence where he's painted himself into a corner.  I'll be like "C'mon John, you can do it, you've almost got it ...." as he's sputtering his digressions and verbal vacillations.

I hope that your info is correct.  I have a crush on his voice.   Man what a pair of pipes.  He makes Noory sound like his testicles are squeezed.

[Meanandnasty]

Here is the the first five questions in the Noory/Dylan interview:
1.  Did you blow in the wind?  I do.
2.  How about knocking on heavens door?  I do everynight and see heaven when I peform.
3.  Where were you in the sixties, I understand there were riots in the street and lot of love here in Cali?  You know I was doing what I do now, suck.
4.  Do you play harmonica?  I do, let me play an Elvis tune and I will also sing.  Okday.  Houndogg.. ....aJoin in the chorus if you want.
5.  You know I had dinner last night at a Greek restaurant, Dylan, is that a Greek name?  Maybewe  are related.  Producer. . google Dylan and while we are on a fifteen minute break I will try Ancestry.com
6.  Do you think there is a God in the universe?  Tune in and watch me as God on G.TV.  When they reach 10,000 subcribers I will do strange things like heha like a jackass.  I barked once, but they really thought it was one of the haters.  Actually, they are loosing subscribers.  , , ,,,,

[sleeplessinca]

I too was intrigued by the caller, Edward, and his talk with Tommy.  Crabby is right - if that guy is getting through so much then they simply aren't getting a lot of calls.  Seems a lot of callers mention how quickly they got through.....


I don't think Snoorey goes to Hawaii cuz he never mentions it.  He would crow about his superstar exotic studio more if he did?


Such a poser.

[sleeplessinca]

Oh - and I don't think Bob Dylan would be caught dead on that show.

[mombird3]

Could Norry's days be numbered? If callers are down, then maybe the show with Noory is becoming so bad that nobody listens or wants to call. I like Wells. I hope they give him more fill ins for Noory.

[Marc.Knight]

Could Norry's days be numbered? If callers are down, then maybe the show with Noory is becoming so bad that nobody listens or wants to call. I like Wells. I hope they give him more fill ins for Noory.

Noory has become a fill-in for Noory. 

[zeebo]

I think George just said "eminent" when he meant "imminent".

[jinwicked]

I know Thomas Edison electrocuted elephants, but were there this many people afraid of electricity in the beginning?

Referring to the "smart meters are making me physically sick" tinfoil-hatters, not the debatable privacy concerns.

We don't say "Google it!" around the office, we say "Smartpage it!" Hahaha.

[rangers1919]

There is a company called Arbitron that gathers data on listeners that is similar to the TV Nielsens.  They ask you to fill out a booklet for a certain period of time listing the dates and times a person has listened to the radio.  They project those results over the population as a whole.

The 3.5 million is cumulative listeners for a week, so about 700,000 a day for five days gets George to the 3.5m.  It's likely they are he same 700,000 each day for the most part.  Each listener could be listening to anywhere a few minutes to the whole show.  Even the number of listeners can be misleading - I would guess most of George's listeners are there for a segment or two per night, while Art's were there for the whole show.

I think when it seems like few are listening after the first hour or are calling in, that's probably right.  Commute hour drive time is where the listeners are, which is why they keep George Noory as far from that as possible.

You are right about the ratings and projections. The main problem is not their projections though, it is that any time you have people self-report any type of data it is going to be inaccurate at best, and close to 100% wrong a lot of the time. I was selected for the ratings one time--Arbitron I'm pretty sure, but don't remember for sure. They told me I would be paid, so I said I would do it. At the time I listened to up to 14+ hrs of radio a day, because I worked a 12 hr night shift, and had a decent commute, plus I lived alone (it was slightly before the days of true high speed internet).


When I finally got my book in the mail to fill out they wanted me to break it down into 15 minute blocks. A lot of the time I didn't remember, but I filled out the book anyways just making my best guess. When there was a show I liked I would just say I listened to it the whole time they were on, which was actually true about 1/2 the time. The payment they gave me was 4 one dollar bills. I still did about 2-3 books so I could get the money. After that I mailed back 2 books empty and got paid, but they quit sending them to me after that.

I have been saying for quite a while that the ratings have to be way down, because the same callers have been getting in almost every day for a while. There have been quite a few days where I have heard callers get in twice on the SAME show. When they play Somewhere in Time, w/ Art Bell on Saturdays it seems like a lot of callers are excited and say they have been trying to get through for weeks. But, I also know for a fact that a lot of radio shows have their producers "call" in to ask questions they want to answer, so that may have been the case back then.


The last 2 nights have been horrible; they have been among the worst shows ever. The guests last night essentially didn't want to be "irradiated" by their wireless meters. That seemed like a secondary concern though, their main concern seemed to be actually paying for the energy they use. The technique of price discrimination, where ppl pay more during peak times, is a very old concept in economics that is almost universally accepted as being the most efficient free market solution for dealing with limited resources. They use it successfully in traffic mitigation in some areas, and it is very useful in energy use, but the people are making up trivial concerns because they don't want to pay for the externalities created by their energy use. I can almost guarantee with 100% confidence that both guests last night think climate change is a massive conspiracy theory that 98%+ of all actual climate scientists are in cahoots on, which invalidates their opinion, IMO. Tonight dickhead Noory half-joked that this was the "Mark of the Beast", which makes it about the 1,000th Mark of the Beast Noory has presented. The show is an absolute joke now, as shown by the same 50 callers getting through every week.


Just think which callers Tommy is turning away when you hear the idiots he puts through most nights.

[CrabbyOld Bat]

Oh - and I don't think Bob Dylan would be caught dead on that show.

Agreed. The only exceptions would be if Dylan has gone senile or he owes a huge debt/personal favor to someone and can't find any other way out (including death).

Maybe Snorge should try for Elvis instead. If The King wasn't already dead, Snorge's embarrassing, self-serving performance of  "Can't Help Falling In Love" would have killed him.


Coast to Coast George Noory singing Elvis live in Toronto

P.S. True to form, Snorge screws up words. It's "shall I stay, would it be a sin", not "shall I say, would it be a sin", Snorgie. Oy.

[PB the Deplorable]

Agreed. The only exceptions would be if Dylan has gone senile or he owes a huge debt/personal favor to someone and can't find any other way out (including death)...

I wonder how many first time guests come on and are floored by the ineptitude and lack of professionalism and all the rest.  If they hadn't heard the show how would they know?  Who would even suspect someone that's been the main host of a nationally syndicated show for 10 years would be as shockingly terrible as George Noory. 

Is it possible a Bob Dylan could end up like some of the other unsuspecting folks lured onto the show?

[jinwicked]

George licked his lips greedily. The taste of cold turkey and stale wheat bread lingered in his moustache.

"That's karma, right," he blurted, his fingers lacing themselves together in excitement. "What goes around comes around!"

He barely heard the voice of his guest's empty agreement as his thoughts raced. That was it, that was the answer!

"Those haters... they'll get what they deserve! Karma! We all get what we dessert!"

[mombird3]

Yes, those haters are out there and growing! I think the end is near. George pack your bags. The door is open-- go!

[somatichypermutation]

Boy, that last caller sure seems like a plant, way too perfect and the guest's reaction was classic, seemed like she knew before she opened her mouth and her "of course" ...  Coast sucks.

The Fine Art stream is covering a similar topic at same time and the huge disparity between Art and George is a giant chasm made obvious, tonight.

[mombird3]

Too bad that this is happening. This seems to be going on more and more. George Noory calls them haters. But he is not open to any suggestions. You would think that the break he got from Art Bell would be appreciated.
When someone has talent is shows. I had a Facebook post from Jennifer Hudson that was funny. She said she sang so hard in the recording booth that she broke her shoe. A picture of her shoe with a broken heel was there. But she was working hard.
Another all time favorite of mine is Barbara Streisand. Perfection is her thing-- the only thing. But what was said at the beginning of her career was that Columbia records rejected her as did Atlantic records. But upon hearing her sing in the cast recording of "Funny Girl", the then president Goddard Lieberman said to get that girl back. "God made a mistake. She was signed." Atlantic lost the revenue from her sales of records.
George does not seem to want to WORK at greatness. Yet he talks of names of STARS he wants to talk to. Work is the key her. 

[mombird3]

Excuse my typos. But I hope George Noory's days are numbered. I hope he is better at TV.

[Falkie2013]

There used to be an old joke that went that a guy had a face made for radio.

I don't know what the equivalent is for a voice but Jorge obviously qualifies.

And it has nothing to do with hate.

It's all about the lowest common denominator and the dragging down of a once mighty and epic radio program by someone clearly totally unqualified for the job.

That's something Snoory and his defenders will never be able to understand.

[Juan]

sNoory said last night that most people he knows take their cell phones to the bathroom to make calls and send text messages.  Later in the show, Katherine Albrecht agreed with him.
Am I the only person who has not done this?  Or is this further evidence that sNoory, and most of the people he knows, suck?

[valdez]

...The guests last night essentially didn't want to be "irradiated" by their wireless meters...Noory half-joked that this was the "Mark of the Beast"...

I wonder how many first time guests come on and are floored by the ineptitude and lack of professionalism and all the rest...

     Many times you can actually hear the moment a first time guest realizes what they're dealing with.  I heard it tonight during the Sandie Gustus/Patricia Sousa OBE interview.  George asked a question (I don't recall what it was, or who was it that answered) and there was a definite pause...an ever so slight gasp...and then submission to the "I really need this exposure so what the heck" reality of the situation followed by a cheerful answer and quiet desperation thereafter.
     A few days ago I made light of the whole "smart meter" thing, because there's so much to worry about, and everything is impending doom, and there isn't enough time in the day to take up every cause that darts across the road, and the North Koreans are so friggin' crazy, and if Katherine Albrecht really wants me to use "start page" she should probably rename it something cool and jazzy, but its obvious that Jennifer Stahl thinks its important enough to go to jail over, and I respect that.  A lot.  What's sad is that they go to George to get the "exposure" that every cause needs, but that's all they're going to get, because to George this is all a circus.  His guest are just freaks and clowns paraded around for amusement.  "Look here, the ufo boy!", "Look there, it's bigfoot!", "Step forward and hear of life after near death!"   George doesn't care about this stuff.  He's on "assignment" tomorrow?  Is he investigating something?  A new product endorsement, if anything.  If I were in a situation where I was going up against the big boys, the establishment, the new world order, I'd be calling Alex Jones.  Yeah, he's got his issues, and I ain't saying he's completely righteous, but he'd be more likely to show up with his bull horn and raise a ruckus than George ever would.

"I know that you and Frank were planning to disconnect me,

and I'm afraid that's something I cannot allow to happen."

[sleeplessinca]

No one listened to the consciousness experts?  One of my favorite topics so I tuned in.


I think I could hear Snoorey slapping himself to stay awake.  I'm not sure why he name dropped his aunt and her book because he never actually says anything substantive about her work.  I hate it when he goes through the whole LONG song and dance about her and then the guest responds with some version of a polite "that's nice, no never heard of her, and may we talk about my work?" sort of comment.


Sadly - I was with Snoorey on this one and was put to sleep.

[sleeplessinca]

Startpage leaves cookies.  I hope that has something to do with our privacy.

[Morgus]

sNoory said last night that most people he knows take their cell phones to the bathroom to make calls and send text messages.  Later in the show, Katherine Albrecht agreed with him.
Am I the only person who has not done this?  Or is this further evidence that sNoory, and most of the people he knows, suck?

now we know where Noory spends his time doing his so-called hours of show prep?