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If life has been kicking your ass lately, post here

Started by Marc.Knight, September 17, 2012, 06:24:18 PM

Marc.Knight

A CG regular prompted me to start this subject.  Friends tend to disappear when things get tough, but you always have CoastGab.

b_dubb

I've been reluctant to post anything personal but we've lost three CLOSE family members this year. It's taken a toll on me and it has really affected my Dad. I relocated to be closer to my Dad so he wouldn't be alone all the time. It seems like I've arrived at a time where loss is going to be paying a visit on a regular basis. So far I've been able to put a positive spin on things and I think I can say that I'm a better person than I was twelve weeks ago. I try to remind myself that people all too often live short horrible lives and that I need to thankful for the time I've had with family and friends. Some times it jst becomes very difficult to remember that.

BigDave

Quote from: M. Knight on September 17, 2012, 06:24:18 PM
A CG regular prompted me to start this subject.  Friends tend to disappear when things get tough, but you always have CoastGab.

I was born with a clubfoot that somehow wasn't treated when I was a baby(My Parents said it was never brought up by My pediatric doctor,so it must have been thought of to be minor). It's been hurting like hell the past few months(swells my ankle and foot like a balloon sometimes). I can't afford to have it operated on because I can't afford to miss work for 6 months. The older I get the worse it seems to get

b_dubb

I hate to hear this. If you had surgery you couldn't get disability while you convalesce?

Marc.Knight

Others probably have different experiences, but when life was kicking my ass the most since 2009 I found some solace with the Noory jokes and photo-shopping found on CoastGab.  A good laugh tended to take the edge off some rough moments.

BigDave

Quote from: b_dubb on September 17, 2012, 06:40:50 PM
I hate to hear this. If you had surgery you couldn't get disability while you convalesce?

I'll have to look into that,I was always on the assumption that I was shit out of luck if I had to have surgery. Thanks for the info ;)

Marc.Knight

Quote from: b_dubb on September 17, 2012, 06:38:59 PM
I've been reluctant to post anything personal but we've lost three CLOSE family members this year. It's taken a toll on me and it has really affected my Dad. I relocated to be closer to my Dad so he wouldn't be alone all the time. It seems like I've arrived at a time where loss is going to be paying a visit on a regular basis. So far I've been able to put a positive spin on things and I think I can say that I'm a better person than I was twelve weeks ago. I try to remind myself that people all too often live short horrible lives and that I need to thankful for the time I've had with family and friends. Some times it jst becomes very difficult to remember that.


Probably nothing can be said to soften the pain associated with this.  How gracious it is of you to move closer to your Dad. 

b_dubb

My Dad and I get a kick out of watching my Mom's Cairn terrier chase my German Short-Haired Pointer around the house. The terrier doesn't have a chance to catch the pointer and she (my pointer) knows it. Always good for a belly laugh

coaster

Quote from: b_dubb on September 17, 2012, 06:38:59 PM
I've been reluctant to post anything personal but we've lost three CLOSE family members this year. It's taken a toll on me and it has really affected my Dad. I relocated to be closer to my Dad so he wouldn't be alone all the time. It seems like I've arrived at a time where loss is going to be paying a visit on a regular basis. So far I've been able to put a positive spin on things and I think I can say that I'm a better person than I was twelve weeks ago. I try to remind myself that people all too often live short horrible lives and that I need to thankful for the time I've had with family and friends. Some times it jst becomes very difficult to remember that.
Sorry to hear about your loss. I'm terrified of losing family members.  I wish you and your family the best. Problems like that really put things in perspective.

Marc.Knight

Quote from: b_dubb on September 17, 2012, 06:45:53 PM
My Dad and I get a kick out of watching my Mom's Cairn terrier chase my German Short-Haired Pointer around the house. The terrier doesn't have a chance to catch the pointer and she (my pointer knows it). Always good for a belly laugh


Sounds like fun.  Because of a change at work I was able to move back to Vermont to live near my Dad for a while.  Previously I had intervals of 3 to 4 years between visits so the quality time was great.  We'd work on cars and cut & stack wood all day in preparation for winter.  It was no easy task when I had to move away again.  Cherish the time.

b_dubb

Quote from: BigDave on September 17, 2012, 06:42:58 PM
I'll have to look into that,I was always on the assumption that I was shit out of luck if I had to have surgery. Thanks for the info ;)
If you're in a Union talk to your rep about it. My brother broke his leg recently and his union rep took care of everything for him.

www.ssa.gov/pubs/10029.html

Hope this helps BigDave

ziznak

well dubb, I have to say you seem to be staying quite level headed and making the correct decisions.  Can't say I've always handled loss well... woken up in the hospital strapped down lately??? I think yer doing fine bro.

For me I'm doing somewhat the same but with my mom since my dad's passed... been two years and she's still getting settled... come to think of it so am i.... I'm glad she's gotten out of the old house and into a nice lil condo... away from the hood and the memories attached to the house. 

ChewMouse

Quote from: BigDave on September 17, 2012, 06:39:06 PM
I was born with a clubfoot that somehow wasn't treated when I was a baby(My Parents said it was never brought up by My pediatric doctor,so it must have been thought of to be minor). It's been hurting like hell the past few months(swells my ankle and foot like a balloon sometimes). I can't afford to have it operated on because I can't afford to miss work for 6 months. The older I get the worse it seems to get
Even if it's minor, you should not have to have pain. The swelling can eventually damage tissue so please get this treated.

One idea that has worked for some: get in touch with the Human Resources Department at your work and find someone you can talk to. There's usually a phone number in your employee handbook (I have no idea where you work or what you do, this is just general advice).

Once you find someone like that, that person can cut through some of the red tape for you. That's what they do for a living!

If that doesn't work or isn't feasible, try going to a doctor and getting a nurse or medical assistant to help you work through the maze of healthcare.

You're not alone with this kind of thing. And: I don't think six months is reasonable. I would think you could be on light duty back at work within a few weeks.

Keep us informed, okay? But don't keep suffering.

Modified to add: if you ARE in a union, by all means follow b_dubb's advice above!!

Quote from: b_dubb on September 17, 2012, 06:38:59 PM
I've been reluctant to post anything personal but we've lost three CLOSE family members this year. It's taken a toll on me and it has really affected my Dad. I relocated to be closer to my Dad so he wouldn't be alone all the time. It seems like I've arrived at a time where loss is going to be paying a visit on a regular basis. So far I've been able to put a positive spin on things and I think I can say that I'm a better person than I was twelve weeks ago. I try to remind myself that people all too often live short horrible lives and that I need to thankful for the time I've had with family and friends. Some times it jst becomes very difficult to remember that.
I was going to post about the pain in the ass moving my family from Alberta to Texas has been, but you and BigDave have given me some nice perspective.  Hope you both get through your tough patches.

HorrorRetro

Quote from: BigDave on September 17, 2012, 06:42:58 PM
I'll have to look into that,I was always on the assumption that I was shit out of luck if I had to have surgery. Thanks for the info ;)

Also, contact the hospital social worker.  Every major facility should have social workers on staff.  They are often aware of programs that the general public isn't. 

ChewMouse

Quote from: HorrorRetro on September 17, 2012, 07:24:02 PM
Also, contact the hospital social worker.  Every major facility should have social workers on staff.  They are often aware of programs that the general public isn't.
Of course that's the best idea. Why didn't I think of that? Social workers can fix things with a single phone call and if they can't, they know someone who can. I said "nurse" just because that's what I am, I wasn't thinking clearly. I hate knowing that someone is in pain and has been for so many years. One reason (only one) that I chose psych nursing is because I can deal with emotional/mental pain in a variety of ways, but when it comes to physical pain, I'm all for instantly setting up a morphine pump to make it stop.

(Fear not, people. I'm not licensed to prescribe drugs.)

HorrorRetro

Quote from: ChewMouse on September 17, 2012, 07:35:07 PM
Of course that's the best idea. Why didn't I think of that? Social workers can fix things with a single phone call and if they can't, they know someone who can. I said "nurse" just because that's what I am, I wasn't thinking clearly. I hate knowing that someone is in pain and has been for so many years. One reason (only one) that I chose psych nursing is because I can deal with emotional/mental pain in a variety of ways, but when it comes to physical pain, I'm all for instantly setting up a morphine pump to make it stop.

(Fear not, people. I'm not licensed to prescribe drugs.)

Before working in legal transcript editing and proofing, I did medical transcription for a few years.  Psych was my favorite specialty.  Just about every case was interesting in some way.

ziznak

Quote from: ChewMouse on September 17, 2012, 07:35:07 PM
I'm all for instantly setting up a morphine pump to make it stop.

(Fear not, people. I'm not licensed to prescribe drugs.)
damn was gonna see if you could hook a neegro up!

McPhallus

Quote from: M. Knight on September 17, 2012, 06:24:18 PM
A CG regular prompted me to start this subject.  Friends tend to disappear when things get tough, but you always have CoastGab.

Not so much life (which has actually been pretty good the last few years), but the dating world has been beating the shit out of me since, well, from day one pretty much.


ziznak

whoa... if i read that correctly that stuff has chloroform and cannabis extract in it as well as the codein? Oh how I wish this stuff could still be had over the counter...   

McPenis,
"if yer having girl problems I feel bad for ya son, I got 99 problems and a bitch aint one.  HIT ME!"

and my own personal advice for meeting women:
if you ignore them they will come

Sardondi

Quote from: b_dubb on September 17, 2012, 06:38:59 PM
I've been reluctant to post anything personal but we've lost three CLOSE family members this year....

I am sorry to hear that. That is a very heavy load indeed, and carries a crushing amount of stress. You really need to do everything you can to take care of your own emotional needs. Easy to say, so very hard to do, though, since just having to get up every day and go to work and earn our living can sap all our energy and time. I truly hope you have other nearby family and friends, because you need to be with them for your own...and their...good.

It's things like this that make disagreements about politics or radio hosts look so petty and meaningless by comparison...as they are.


BobGrau

For once in my life, I'm actually insanely happy. Previous experience suggests a massive fall ahead. I look forward to returning to this thread when the inevitable happens.

All I can offer just now is: Life is full of surprises.

Juan

I went in to work last week and, along with 9 others, was told that our jobs were eliminated due to slow sales. At least I'm alive, my bad knee is no longer hurting, and I have positive plans for my future.

Best of luck to the rest of you.


McPhallus

Quote from: Sardondi on September 17, 2012, 10:31:05 PM
I am sorry to hear that.

It's things like this that make disagreements about politics or radio hosts look so petty and meaningless by comparison...as they are.

I don't think it's the subject matter of those topics but the fact that some people insist on using the discussion to fuel their own egos.

b_dubb

Quote from: McPhallus on September 18, 2012, 10:34:12 AM
I don't think it's the subject matter of those topics but the fact that some people insist on using the discussion to fuel their own egos.
I don't mind discussing politics. I mind being bludgeoned with someone's opinion


MV/Liberace!

Quote from: UFO Fill on September 18, 2012, 09:47:12 AM
I went in to work last week and, along with 9 others, was told that our jobs were eliminated due to slow sales. At least I'm alive, my bad knee is no longer hurting, and I have positive plans for my future.

Best of luck to the rest of you.


good luck brother... and unlike a lot of people who say that to you in life, i really mean it.

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