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Hello from the UK

Started by Puxley, November 03, 2015, 10:28:37 AM

SredniVashtar

Quote from: Yorkshire pud on November 05, 2015, 12:45:38 PM
I thought enterprise was a watchword in the land of  the free paranoid, shit scared, insular? It's never failed me yet. This year I've collected 63 pence. Mainly from the poor.

"Collected" is how he likes to phrase it. Really he's just a very shitty mugger.

Of all the traditions in England, I'd have to say my favorite is the one where they roll a giant ball of cheese downhill and chase after it.  It's a bloody shame that one somehow never made it's way across the pond to be celebrated here.

http://www.cheese-rolling.co.uk/index1.htm

Yorkshire pud

Quote from: Paper*Boy on November 05, 2015, 01:22:27 PM
Of all the traditions in England, I'd have to say my favorite is the one where they roll a giant ball of cheese downhill and chase after it.  It's a bloody shame that one somehow never made it's way across the pond to be celebrated here.

http://www.cheese-rolling.co.uk/index1.htm

I think that's Gloucstershire. I used to live there...oh dear.

It's now I believe unofficial because the organisors were scared of being sued for health and safety reasons. But the straw chewing yokels like nothing more than a few broken limbs and a laugh over a pint or three of scrumpy.

K_Dubb

Quote from: Paper*Boy on November 05, 2015, 01:22:27 PM
Of all the traditions in England, I'd have to say my favorite is the one where they roll a giant ball of cheese downhill and chase after it.  It's a bloody shame that one somehow never made it's way across the pond to be celebrated here.

http://www.cheese-rolling.co.uk/index1.htm

Haha I forgot about that one!

This is how I imagine our estimable English colleagues passing their spare time between posts:

Quote from: K_Dubb on November 05, 2015, 01:30:35 PM
Haha I forgot about that one!

This is how I imagine our estimable English colleagues passing their spare time between posts:


Ah, the lost art of Morris Dancing.

Yorkshire pud

Quote from: Inglorious Bitch on November 05, 2015, 01:37:56 PM
Ah, the lost art of Morris Dancing.

They could have someone's eye out waving those bloody sticks around. Heathens.

Quote from: SredniVashtar on November 05, 2015, 12:54:48 PM
"Collected" is how he likes to phrase it. Really he's just a very shitty mugger.

Are you going to just sit there on your loathsome, spotty behind and take that guff, Yorkie?  Get up and defend your honor, sir, because it's always fun to watch two Englishmen fight.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8XeDvKqI4E


SredniVashtar

Quote from: Inglorious Bitch on November 05, 2015, 01:37:56 PM
Ah, the lost art of Morris Dancing.

I think there was once a plan after World War Two (all you Americans, I recommend you Google it; it made quite a noise at one point in our history) after the Nuremberg trials (again, it happened more than a decade ago, so I don't expect you to remember it), that Goering and co should be turned over to the English and learn the rudiments of that fine old pastime. To, in their words, "folk dance the goose step out of the bastards". But they preferred to be hanged instead. There is no accounting for taste.

weeberwubber

For a short time after they banned online poker in the US I "lived" in an Inn in Haworth, West Yorkshire. Was it nice? What kind of person was I likely to be? Did I talk funny?

Quote from: SredniVashtar on November 05, 2015, 01:44:56 PM
I think there was once a plan after World War Two (all you Americans, I recommend you Google it; it made quite a noise at one point in our history) after the Nuremberg trials (again, it happened more than a decade ago, so I don't expect you to remember it), that Goering and co should be turned over to the English and learn the rudiments of that fine old pastime. To, in their words, "folk dance the goose step out of the bastards". But they preferred to be hanged instead. There is no accounting for taste.

Yeah, well never forget that if we hadn't saved your sorry arses duing WWII, you'd all be speaking Chinese. 

K_Dubb

Quote from: Inglorious Bitch on November 05, 2015, 01:37:56 PM
Ah, the lost art of Morris Dancing.

I understand it is mentioned in the same breath as incest over there.  Any nation producing such an epigram deserves to be regarded with suspicion.

Yorkshire pud

Quote from: weeberwubber on November 05, 2015, 01:48:00 PM
For a short time after they banned online poker in the US I "lived" in an Inn in Haworth, West Yorkshire. Was it nice? What kind of person was I likely to be? Did I talk funny?

Haworth is a lovely place; quite one of the only nice places in West Yorkshire. You would have spoken 'funny', but not nearly as funny as if you'd spoken in the accent of any other English district or county. There is really only one county in England; and it is Yorkshire. Some may argue, but they're wrong.

Quote from: SredniVashtar on November 05, 2015, 01:44:56 PM
I think there was once a plan after World War Two (all you Americans, I recommend you Google it; it made quite a noise at one point in our history) after the Nuremberg trials (again, it happened more than a decade ago, so I don't expect you to remember it), that Goering and co should be turned over to the English and learn the rudiments of that fine old pastime. To, in their words, "folk dance the goose step out of the bastards". But they preferred to be hanged instead. There is no accounting for taste.

What's the matter, SV? Ever since the gabcast you've been so nice to me online. No invective, no snark. People will begin to believe that you've gone soft, although truth be told, "soft" is a permanent state of affairs with you.

Yorkshire pud

Quote from: Inglorious Bitch on November 05, 2015, 02:01:34 PM
What's the matter, SV? Ever since the gabcast you've been so nice to me online. No invective, no snark. People will begin to believe that you've gone soft, although truth be told, "soft" is a permanent state of affairs with you.


Ahh so SV did post the video after all!

SredniVashtar

Quote from: K_Dubb on November 05, 2015, 01:59:38 PM
I understand it is mentioned in the same breath as incest over there.  Any nation producing such an epigram deserves to be regarded with suspicion.

There used to be a well-known phrase back in the day about the sun never setting on the British Empire - because God didn't trust us in the dark. There is probably a certain amount of justice to that - perfidious Albion and all the rest of it. Although I recommend you all PM me your credit card details so that I can reassure you that it is not true in all cases.

I suppose you are referring to the saying, "try anything once, apart from incest and morris dancing". What it means is that you shouldn't do them both at the same time, because it can lead to all sorts of complications and unpleasantness.




chefist

I like this thread...are there only 3 Brits that know about BellGab? Or are the rest too embarrassed to post?

Quote from: SredniVashtar on November 05, 2015, 02:05:21 PM
the sun never setting on the British Empire - because God didn't trust us in the dark.

Neither do the sheep.

Yorkshire pud

Quote from: chefist on November 05, 2015, 02:08:35 PM
I like this thread...are there only 3 Brits that know about BellGab? Or are the rest too embarrassed to post?

Yes


K_Dubb

Quote from: SredniVashtar on November 05, 2015, 02:05:21 PM
There used to be a well-known phrase back in the day about the sun never setting on the British Empire - because God didn't trust us in the dark. There is probably a certain amount of justice to that - perfidious Albion and all the rest of it. Although I recommend you all PM me your credit card details so that I can reassure you that it is not true in all cases.

I suppose you are referring to the saying, "try anything once, apart from incest and morris dancing". What it means is that you shouldn't do them both at the same time, because it can lead to all sorts of complications and unpleasantness.

Haha yes that's the one!  Enshrined in tradition along with rum, sodomy, and the lash.

It may amuse you fellows to know that, thanks to the inroads made by foreign media and those twits they keep putting on CNN, a certain aping of British culture has achieved currency with the hipster classes here.  Within a generation or two the kind of linguistic conformity you are always ballyhooing will come to pass if you're not careful, we'll all start refusing ever to pronounce an r except where it doesn't belong, and we can't make fun of each other any more.

I'm the biggest bow-of-burning-gold anglophile I know and am fighting a losing battle with all the casual cheers and regards being thrown around.


SciFiAuthor

Quote from: SredniVashtar on November 05, 2015, 01:44:56 PM
I think there was once a plan after World War Two (all you Americans, I recommend you Google it; it made quite a noise at one point in our history) after the Nuremberg trials (again, it happened more than a decade ago, so I don't expect you to remember it), that Goering and co should be turned over to the English and learn the rudiments of that fine old pastime. To, in their words, "folk dance the goose step out of the bastards". But they preferred to be hanged instead. There is no accounting for taste.

As I recall, Goering poisoned himself after learning that we intended to make him wear a wife beater shirt and loud shorts at the trial. Apparently he was quite sensitive to fashion and didn't want to be Americanized. 

Quote from: K_Dubb on November 05, 2015, 03:02:18 PM

It may amuse you fellows to know that, thanks to the inroads made by foreign media and those twits they keep putting on CNN, a certain aping of British culture has achieved currency with the hipster classes here.

I blame this guy.  If you take him back, we'll keep Russell Brand on alternate Tuesdays and Thursdays for you. You won't get a better deal than that anywhere else!



weeberwubber

Quote from: Yorkshire pud on November 05, 2015, 02:00:21 PM
Haworth is a lovely place; quite one of the only nice places in West Yorkshire. You would have spoken 'funny', but not nearly as funny as if you'd spoken in the accent of any other English district or county. There is really only one county in England; and it is Yorkshire. Some may argue, but they're wrong.

Thank you!

albrecht

Quote from: Robert Ghostwolf's Ghost on November 05, 2015, 03:34:15 PM
I blame this guy.  If you take him back, we'll keep Russell Brand on alternate Tuesdays and Thursdays for you. You won't get a better deal than that anywhere else!
Is that guy still working? Wasn't he found in a compromising position (rope around some appendages and sex-toys) with meth etc in a public park?

Eddie Coyle

Quote from: albrecht on November 05, 2015, 04:36:45 PM
Wasn't he found in a compromising position (rope around some appendages and sex-toys) with meth etc in a public park?

    That got him a promotion and lifetime appointment at CNN.
     

Quote from: albrecht on November 05, 2015, 04:36:45 PM
Is that guy still working? Wasn't he found in a compromising position (rope around some appendages and sex-toys) with meth etc in a public park?
Well, what two consenting adults do on their own time....... ;)

albrecht

Quote from: Inglorious Bitch on November 05, 2015, 04:56:53 PM
Well, what two consenting adults do on their own time....... ;)
Sure. Whatever floats his boat, just please no more in a public park. And I would suggest care with nooses, lest he finds himself in a David Carradine (though we all know he was killed by ninjas and criminal gangs as revenge for giving away kung-fu secrets.) And what is with announcing to the cops when caught that you have meth? Before they search you or even ask you? And this is the guy who is supposed to report on news items for us?

Happy bonfire night for all you Brits. FTP. Hahaha. Burn some good effigies.

paladin1991

Quote from: Yorkshire pud on November 05, 2015, 12:45:38 PM
I thought enterprise was a watchword in the land of  the free paranoid, shit scared, insular? It's never failed me yet. This year I've collected 63 pence. Mainly from the poor.

You and Felchie.  A fine pair of fellows.


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