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I'm begging you, please, no more Whitley Streiber

Started by Gassy Man, October 03, 2013, 06:52:12 PM

area51drone

Sex sells.  Apparently, the only problem is that Weeber doesn't know what kind.

stevesh

Quote from: Sardondi on October 05, 2013, 05:56:29 AM
Echoes of the most bizarre Whitley I ever heard, when he, for some damn reason related to his bizarre imperative to self-destructive over-sharing, discussed with George an event in which he was some remote place (the famous cabin in the woods?) alone with some woman who was putting the moves on him, and Whitley kept calling his wife to tell her how the seduction was going and discuss whether or not he should succumb and start an affair with the woman.

Words fail me.

I remember that. I think he was in a hotel room in California with the other woman. Probably never happened, like most of Streiber's tales, but I can't imagine why he would make up and then share a story like that publicly, orther than his attention-whoredness.

b_dubb

http://youtu.be/KBhru5nLpGE

I can sum up Whitley, this thread, and 98% of all alien abductions with this clip

area51drone

Quote from: b_dubb on October 05, 2013, 08:19:48 AM
I can sum up Whitley, this thread, and 98% of all alien abductions with this clip

That was hilarious, and agreed!  1 in 10... LOL


juanelo

In the early morning of June 6, 1998, Strieber was asleep in his room at the Delta Chelsea Hotel in Toronto when there was a knock at the door.

"I got up to open the door, thinking it was the room service waiter. It was not. It was a man I described as about 5 and a half feet tall, young-looking, like someone in his 20s. He wore dark-colored clothing, a leather jacket and leather pants, he had with him a bottle of Ky,gag ball and some candles ," Strieber told The Huffington Post.

Strieber's unannounced visitor stayed nearly an hour and never sat down or walked around -- he stood, motionless, by the window with a hard on, Strieber and then stranger then start sucking each others dicks

As the stranger spoke, Strieber listen like a dirty little whore that he is, eventually privately publishing the first edition of his book, "The Meow," two years later, in 2000.

And this is what really happen

b_dubb

Quote from: guildnavigator on October 05, 2013, 01:13:24 PM
I'm trying to find the episode I saw, but I ran into this instead:


http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/09/07/communion-author-whitley-strieber_n_943681.html

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=TkLU4hmNlCM#t=122

Really, How much bizarre shit can happen to one guy??
Whitley Strieber - Artisanal Bullshit Vendor.  This never happened.  Juanelo may have a point however.  Ick.

area51drone

Do get "The Key", but don't go to NZBClub.com and search "Whitely Strieber The Key."   Don't do what others have done and get yourself a free copy of Unzbin, and certainly don't go find yourself a free binary usenet server.    "The Key" is a gripping true story from a writer of many fiction novels, who realized that if he claims his fiction to be reality, he'll sell many copies to the unsuspecting public.  The man affectionately known as Weeber will grab you by the throat and ram so much truth down it that you'll suffocate on his words.   Do get "The Key," just make sure you get it the right way.

Wintermute

The SouthPark thing through me for a loop as well.

Whitley Streiber believes he was abducted, so who are we to judge?

BUT... you ever notice since the explosion of digital cameras and cheap HD video that no one has caught any kind of real E.T. activity?

Just saying that if there were a group of aliens tracking my human progress and checking in on my and my family through time, I'd have about a dozen GoPro cameras on my house and one on my car.

b_dubb

there's a significant amount of film and video evidence that have recorded unidentified flying objects. however there has been no security camera footage of ass obsessed aliens on a cornholee expedition. at least not that i know of.

Quote from: b_dubb on October 07, 2013, 10:00:56 AM
there's a significant amount of film and video evidence that have recorded unidentified flying objects. however there has been no security camera footage of ass obsessed aliens on a cornholee expedition. at least not that i know of.

And doesn't it seem odd that creatures capable of interstellar travel (and who, according to reports, have been hovering around this planet for some time) would find the human digestive tract so endlessly fascinating?

b_dubb

Quote from: West of the Rockies on October 07, 2013, 11:44:32 AM
And doesn't it seem odd that creatures capable of interstellar travel (and who, according to reports, have been hovering around this planet for some time) would find the human digestive tract so endlessly fascinating?
yes. I believe my Kids In The Hall post above would confirm as much.

Quote from: West of the Rockies on October 07, 2013, 11:44:32 AM
And doesn't it seem odd that creatures capable of interstellar travel (and who, according to reports, have been hovering around this planet for some time) would find the human digestive tract so endlessly fascinating?


Don't ruin Weeber's story. Weeber's not got much else left.


I don't really have anything to say, I just enjoy the word "Weeber's"

gringomisio

Quote from: Wintermute on October 07, 2013, 08:13:37 AM
The SouthPark thing through me for a loop as well.



Was it just me or did he blame South Park for most of his financial troubles?

Quote from: gringomisio on October 07, 2013, 03:10:10 PM
Was it just me or did he blame South Park for most of his financial troubles?


It wasn't just you, it was a blame-fest.

"Nobody buys my book because I'm the anal probe guy!"


That's the main reason they DID buy your book, Weeber!!!

WRITE WOLFEN II!

juanelo


area51drone

Quote from: guildnavigator on October 07, 2013, 01:44:55 PM
I don't really have anything to say, I just enjoy the word "Weeber's"

Me too.

Weeber me once, shame on Weeber.  Weeber me twice, shame on me!

DanTSX

Whatever those aliens shoved up his ass, hit his brain.



I'm sure it was his pineal gland ;D

I finally listened to the show with Hoagie then Whitley.  I had more than my fill of Hoaxie the first time Art had him on a couple weeks ago so I started at the part when Whit came on.

I forgot how earnest yet whiny Whitley is.  Or how he would talk about how he would never have believed the story if it weren't his own, then blast everyone else who didn't believe him.  There were lot's of new details, so it wasn't just for the new listeners

I got a good laugh when he was talking about the South Park episode and the mean people who laughed at him.  That was some funny shit. 

I didn't want to listen to the whole thing so I was glad the guest that called him 'Weeber' came early.  That was great radio.


When Whit made the guy say Strieber, that didn't really come out right either.  I couldn't quite tell if the person nervous or was he pranking poor Whitley - he had a question Whit liked.

Quote from: Paper*Boy on October 08, 2013, 09:15:45 AM
I finally listened to the show with Hoagie then Whitley.  I had more than my fill of Hoaxie the first time Art had him on a couple weeks ago so I started at the part when Whit came on.

I forgot how earnest yet whiny Whitley is.  Or how he would talk about how he would never have believed the story if it weren't his own, then blast everyone else who didn't believe him.  There were lot's of new details, so it wasn't just for the new listeners

I got a good laugh when he was talking about the South Park episode and the mean people who laughed at him.  That was some funny shit. 

I didn't want to listen to the whole thing so I was glad the guest that called him 'Weeber' came early.  That was great radio.


When Whit made the guy say Strieber, that didn't really come out right either.  I couldn't quite tell if the person nervous or was he pranking poor Whitley - he had a question Whit liked.


Haha... Yeah the Weeber call is a modern classic in my opinion. Didn't the caller start with a"51's to you art"? So he's got to be a member. It sounded like it could have been unintentional, sometimes people blend two words together inadvertently, turning Whitley and Streiber into WEEBER.

I'd like to know who made the call, so I can thank the guy.


Weebergate!

Harmness

If I didn't already have a name here, I would be Weeber Cornhole.

someguy

Quote from: b_dubb on October 07, 2013, 10:00:56 AM
there's a significant amount of film and video evidence that have recorded unidentified flying objects. however there has been no security camera footage of ass obsessed aliens on a cornholee expedition. at least not that i know of.

That's where you're wrong. Check out this video, stolen from Area 51:

Ufo Porno

DanTSX

Quote from: guildnavigator on October 07, 2013, 03:25:12 PM

It wasn't just you, it was a blame-fest.

"Nobody buys my book because I'm the anal probe guy!"


That's the main reason they DID buy your book, Weeber!!!

WRITE WOLFEN II!

The guy in my avatar is always shamelessly probing buttholes, but still makes plenty of money.    Sometimes it's GOOD to be the anal probe guy Whitley.  It all depends how you execute it. 

The General

Quote from: area51drone on October 07, 2013, 10:01:26 PM
Me too.

Weeber me once, shame on Weeber.  Weeber me twice, shame on me!
But also still shame on Weeber, too.

Weeber me three times and I was out in the forest with a low cut shirt and showing too much leg, just asking to be Weeber holed again.  Begging the little blue fuckers for it. 

And shame on Weeber.

b_dubb

Quote from: DanTSX on October 08, 2013, 07:40:59 PM
The guy in my avatar is always shamelessly probing buttholes, but still makes plenty of money.    Sometimes it's GOOD to be the anal probe guy Whitley.  It all depends how you execute it.
ummm ... what?

Sardondi

Quote from: The General on October 08, 2013, 07:56:59 PMBut also still shame on Weeber, too.

Weeber me three times and I was out in the forest with a low cut shirt and showing too much leg, just asking to be Weeber holed again.  Begging the little blue fuckers for it. 

And shame on Weeber.
So maybe we need a new phrase to replace the harsh and, frankly, offensive "anal probe". Why don't we just call it "a Weeber"?

As in, "After seeing the blindingly bright light, Johnny remembered nothing. But the next morning, half his body was badly sunburned, and he had great discomfort upon evacuating his bowels. A strong blue-green phosphorescence in the toilet bowl left no doubt: Johnny had been Weebered."

I like it.


Sardondi

Quote from: onan on October 08, 2013, 09:22:47 PMWeebers wobble but they don't fall down.
Using "Weeber" as a euphemism for anal probe by alien would have immediate and significant cultural impact. Just think of how Independence Day would be altered, as the crop duster that everyone mocked because of his tales of alien abduction and anal probing: how much nicer for him to be able to say, "I was Weebered by the little bastards, Mr. President!". So much more pleasant.

The General

Quote from: Sardondi on October 08, 2013, 09:39:08 PM
Using "Weeber" as a euphemism for anal probe by alien would have immediate and significant cultural impact....
I love it.
From here on out, any funny business by any alien in the anal area is hereby christened...
'Weebered'

area51drone

Quote from: The General on October 08, 2013, 09:47:27 PM
I love it.
From here on out, any funny business by any alien in the anal area is hereby christened...
'Weebered'

I second this motion.  All in favor, say I!


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