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George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

Started by MV/Liberace!, April 06, 2008, 01:23:02 AM

Can Noory pronounce anything correctly?

No
No

Spikegirl

Quote from: Camazotz Automat on August 13, 2008, 12:29:40 PM
    Number Two: I am definitely an optimist. That's why it doesn't matter who Number One is. It doesn't matter which "side" runs the Village.

    Number Six: It's run by one side or the other.

    Number Two: Oh certainly, but both sides are becoming identical. What in fact has been created is an international community ? a perfect blueprint for world order. When the sides facing each other suddenly realize that they're looking into a mirror, they will see that this is the pattern for the future.

    Number Six: The whole Earth as the Village?

    Number Two: That is my hope. What's yours?

    Number Six: I'd like to be the first man on the moon.


-The Prisoner, 1967



CAMAZOTZ  AUTOMAT



Who are you? I am number 2.

Who is number 1?

You are number 6.

I am not a number!



love me some Patrick McGoohan

Loui Zoot

Yuck, Loren Coleman was just giving an update on the dna results for the bigfake in the 'frigerator. 3 tests, on a "meaty" substance 2 were human, the 3rd was a combo of human and possum. Where and who in the living hell are they getting these meaty human substances from to be tested. Is that cop stealing them from a morgue? That's probably the most disturbing thing I've heard on c2c in some time.

MV/Liberace!

orrrrrr...

maybe the cop's hand injury can be explained by something other than a gun shot.

towerjunkie

THE RETURN OF JC!!! TONIGHT WAS WORTH LISTENING! (for once)

JC could do a better job hosting than snoory!

I'm wasted and I'm sure that's a true statement.

lol

"It was the wrong chicken ranch you went to, JC..." --George "Snoory"

EvB

Quote from: Loui Zoot on August 16, 2008, 12:20:09 AM
Yuck, Loren Coleman was just giving an update on the dna results for the bigfake in the 'frigerator. 3 tests, on a "meaty" substance 2 were human, the 3rd was a combo of human and possum. Where and who in the living hell are they getting these meaty human substances from to be tested. Is that cop stealing them from a morgue? That's probably the most disturbing thing I've heard on c2c in some time.

When this "news item" first came across Ian's desk - he first read it straight - then said that he had gone to these guys website (which he didn't give the URL for) and that it said that the pictures were not ready to be released (where they still DEVELOPING?  WTF?) but that you could pay for advanced copies - at which point - Ian scoffed and didn't have much good to say about this report - and this from a crypto freak who I sometimes would be willing to consider reports on unicorns. 

Now, according to the video MV linked to - the pic was released only because someone hacked the website and got the photo w/o paying.

Another case of "are YOU stupid?" ("you" being the perpetrators of the hoax) "Or do you just think we are?"

I have the video playing now - but the one photo I did see was so fake it was insulting. 

Meegle

Been on vacation so I havent posted in a while. Just got back and hopefully the topics will be interesting this week...

Here's what I caught on a night last week...George was on top of his brain-farts again so kinda very little to report.....weird!




"...the Kremblin..."   (In Russia?)

"....he suffercated..."   (Succotash?)

"...7 NASA Astronauts are eagally looking forward..."    (Earnestly?)

"...the materia whirl..."   (we are living in it.)

"How did a Business Communication professern....?"

"...Trina in Torontoes wants to know..."   (Yeah that's right..Canadian foot fetishists unite!)

I have a question....why doesn't George say thanks to EVERY caller AND say bye to them. It's so abrupt how they're just gone somtimes! Also why does
he say West or East of the Rockies? Who cares about where they are in reference to mountains????

Meegle

Here's what I caught from the show with Stanton Freidman last week...


"Geez!"

"This is an incredible story."

"I'm sure you protested quite a bit, now let us know what exactly you're posed to."  (OPPOSED!!!)

"This is a strange story."

"He worked as a Nuclear Physysis..."

"You know I do not believe that disclosure is not going to come from governments, I think it's going to come from resherchers like..."

"...yuclear aircraft..."

"Now when you say that the plane disappeared, do you mean without a trace....it could'a been gobbled up!?!?!"

"Let me ask you, as we think back to Close Encounter of the Third Kind Movie, and craft are gobbled up..."

"To the phones we go, it'll be our wild car dine..."

"Geez...amazing..."


....................and I'm spent!  (That was me..not George.)

Frys Girl

Part of the reason he says such idiotic things is that he barely listens. I don't even think George listens to guests at all. All I hear him doing while they are talking is writing and scribbling. He's probably doodling self-portraits of himself being crowned king of the keebler elves or something.

Meegle

Here's what I took in from the Bigfoot show from last Friday I think...poor George was more stroke mouthy than ever. Unfortunately I couldn't take more than 30 minutes of the show.


"...the ingredient is in dozens of househole items."

"..it's next generation spacesue..."   (SUIT!!!!)

"...you know that the proof is in the pudding."   (very wise)

"...that's amazing..."

"...preciate it."      (Ap...?)

"If he told me to go to the bank, I'd take it to the bank!"

"Well, he we are Lone..."   (The guest's name is Lorn)

"This whole thing is BUHZAR!!!"  (Bazaar?)

"I love it!"

"He's made  Bigfoot cost ums before..."    (Um?)


Well...sorry folks I couldn't take anymore of this Bigfoot show...

I think I'll listen to Knapp now.

                                                   :)

Loui Zoot

That latest Knapp show was boring as hell, I hate to say it, but it was. It wasn't so much because of the topics that the guest had, it was the guest.

Frys Girl

LOL the bigfoot show. My favorite part was when he gave a theory (brilliant, of course) that the Bigfoot body could be a real human corpse accidentally shot by the dudes who were hunting bigfoot. Even the guest was silent and said "yea.... um. i dont think so"

EvB

Quote from: Loui Zoot on August 21, 2008, 11:06:40 AM
That latest Knapp show was boring as hell, I hate to say it, but it was. It wasn't so much because of the topics that the guest had, it was the guest.


Guess that's where personal interests come in.  This last Knapp show was the one that made me decide I liked George Knapp - and I enjoyed the program over all.


EvB

Quote from: Frys Girl on August 21, 2008, 11:24:09 AM
LOL the bigfoot show. My favorite part was when he gave a theory (brilliant, of course) that the Bigfoot body could be a real human corpse accidentally shot by the dudes who were hunting bigfoot. Even the guest was silent and said "yea.... um. i dont think so"

That WAS odd - but I think i came form the fact that the DNA that was tested was a combo of human and opossum! (Can you imagine the nerve of the people who sent THAT in!?)

Frys Girl

I think what was more crazy throughout this entire ordeal was Tom Biscardi on Fox claiming everyone involved are heros. What a douche.

Meegle

I saw that Leela.

But hey! When did "douche" become something "bad".....it cleans beautiful things no?

;D

EvB

Quote from: Meegle on August 21, 2008, 04:41:14 PM
I saw that Leela.

But hey! When did "douche" become something "bad".....it cleans beautiful things no?

;D

I asked a similar question when the site first opened.  What the answer boiled down to was, the guys just like SAYING the word!  LOL!

Frys Girl

In these parts, it's a very common word for fleabags. It's short and French..... a funny combo I guess. G-man is probably practicing his scolding for Biscardi tonight (in front of the mirror despite the fact that he'll be on radio). "What a shame. Shame.... shame..."


As for douches being related to beautiful things....that's true. Honestly, douche in my native language just means shower in general. Douching a vagina is kinda, um, I don't know! viva vagina, viva douche, eh i dont know.

Frys Girl

I also wanted to mention the quote "Alex, how about don't get arrested this time? Sheesh"

Alex jones is wearing a toupe/hair piece. I'm sure of it!


Loui Zoot


Frys Girl

If his toupe falls off while he gets arrested in Denver, he'd scream "Bastards!My toupe! It's in the bill of rights!" Sometimes I like the guy though, as nutty as he is.

Meegle

On to the DARK STAR episode....

"...yuclear missiles..."

"...reports that a 16 yearo girl had been texxing on her phone..."         (OK...is this an accent or can he really not speak?)

"...this is a Coast to Coast Am HOT story, a 10 year old Tortoise in New Jersey..."         (Hot? Who the fuck cares? Stupid Human Interest Bull Shit)

"This has all the makings of a huge disaster...I CAN FEEL IT!"        (....sky...falling......you know the drill.)

"...during whirl wore two..."        (If you can't say it why not just say "dubyadubyatoo"?)

"...and in terms of selecting a pa a pa President..."          ('That's all Folks!')

"...it was just so overwhelming, I had to digest myself into it..."       (Huh? Does he mean immerse? Submerge? What does that mean?)

"...ellipitical orbit chra-chec-tories..."        ( Truh   -    jek    -    tore    -  ees   !!!!!)

"Some dinosaurs beefy-four they died out...)         (Mmmmm...beefy!)"

"I could never forget that line from Contact, it said it doll."        (it....all!)


And well that's all I could take of this "Dark Star" show.

Was it me or did the guest sound like the GEICO Gecko?

Meegle

Here's what I got from the Joshua P. Warren show. I kinda like this guy. His voice is pretty cool and seems knowledgable and must have means! Especially if he's able to afford the things he puts on like cruises and such.


Onto the Georgeisms...


"...amosheds!"     (No idea...seriously)

"...we apparently talked to the person that..."    (Apparently? Does he not remember?)

"...when they talk about these very strange nomolies they saw..."       (I guess 4 syllables was just too much.)

"I saw a picture today of a dolphin trying to teach others how to walk on water with their little tail-fin.....isn't that something?"   (Nope, that is actually nothing.)

"...I can't believe that there are so many people out.....uh.....there...that...."    (Big ole cerebral air-biscuit!)

"Geeez."         (Jeebus again.)


________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Dialogue:

George - "A couple of months ago a frind of mine died in a motorcycle accident and, I've talked about this on the show, and as I was looking at him I thought that 'this is it' - 'there's nothing else'. I've never thought like that before. I've always thought that there was something after this life.........why did I think that?"

Guest - "....................................................Well you were looking at his corpse right?"

(LOL!!!!)
________________________________________________________________________________________________________



________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Quote from Guest Joshua P. Warren:

"You know I could wake up tomorrow and this could be a world where there's no George Noory."

                                                                                    I think we ALL have that dream....every night.
________________________________________________________________________________________________________



"When we come back we'll talk about those ex-uh-sizes..."    (Sit-uhps?)

"Zuswongonashowas a few surprises?"     (WTF? seriously)

"...or maybe some of your ghost's stories that he can analyze..."     (So a ghost will be interviewed?)

"Josha how does 2012 tie in here?"   (Josh - ooo - ah)

"Let's go to the phones dow."    (I think he meant NOW!!!!)


________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Guest quote:

"Most religions were founded by people who didn't know how a microwave oven works."
                                                                                               Never a truer word was spoke.
________________________________________________________________________________________________________


"Josha before we get back to calls."   (THAT'S TWICE! I hate when people mispronounce my name; I've noticed that George doesn't JUST leave letters out of words...he leaves whole syllables out too!)



That's it for this show...

Is it just me or does it seem that George HATES it when a caller asks how he and/or the guest(s) are doing and he's just waiting to hang up on them?

Bye for now...gonna go douche.   :P



Meegle

13 unexplained hooha yadda yaddas in a yawning unexplainabuhble whirl..........show.



"...large airy..."    (area? areola?)

"...his book was publissed..."    (Goodbye H)

"...with one of his cleansing breakfassus..."    (George talks too fassus!)

"..every periodically we'll do something like this..."    (That'sthat's redundantredundant.)

"...she recounted it on the the TV show 'That's Increbuhble'..."     (Saliva hoarding fool.)

"...they're putting in a missile defense system 150 miles from the Shrussian border."    (Prussia?)

"Skood question."

"I think the best physsisus out there are those that explain...."    (Let's Ssplain English to George shall we?)

"If people can't explain it to me then we won't do a show on it."  (So we're at the whim of a person with the sense of a donkey on exploring really interesting topics?)

"Are people tense there? Do they expect something BAD to happen?"    (Chicken Little et al.)

Guest:  "Somewhere in another universe there's another one of you George."     (ick)

"Re ruh ra and they do merge."    (Guess it won't turn over.)

"We'll be back in a moment and talk about alien life............................................................................alien life."    (I guess George thinks that it's dramatic to have huge pauses like that.)

And YAWN....It's insufferable to listen to George try and seem informed and intelligent when talking about Science. And I thought I was going to like this show. The guest sounded like Dr. Goodfellow from Buck Rogers.


Spikegirl

Quote from: Meegle on August 22, 2008, 02:19:25 PM


________________________________________________________________________________________________________


________________________________________________________________________________________________________



________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Quote from Guest Joshua P. Warren:

"You know I could wake up tomorrow and this could be a world where there's no George Noory."

                                                                                    I think we ALL have that dream....every night.
________________________________________________________________________________________________________





________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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LOL-that got an 'On the money'!

MV/Liberace!

Quote from: Frys Girl on August 21, 2008, 05:05:00 PM
Honestly, douche in my native language just means shower in general.

Yes!!  one of the observations i've made in my wife's quest to teach me arabic.

bisalama.

MV/Liberace!

Quote from: Meegle on August 22, 2008, 02:19:25 PM
"...we apparently talked to the person that..."    (Apparently? Does he not remember?)
HAHA yeah i heard this and wondered if anybody would pick up on it.  guess somebody did.

i love these posts of yours.

Frys Girl

Oh my. That poll is awesome. Set those results free/public. Snoory sucks!

Meegle

Well I actually listened to a whole show! Say what you will I find Hoagland's ideas fascinating. Here's what I caught from the Nazi show last Thursday.

"...he and his remote grevururing group..."     (...........Daisy..........daisy..........daisy...........)


Ray Bradbury: "I'm a great playwright too!"    (LOL!)


"Dyus da do ya feel 88 Ray...?      (da do run run)


"...his Apollo missions to the myune..."   (Circling the Earf)


"Coupla.......several..."     ( It's a new word folks!)


"You can do that with the goo-ons..."       (no idea)


"Speak in terms that I can understand."    (Hooked on Noorics)


Hoagland : "I wrote a book called Dark Mission..."    (Really? I've NEVER heard you say that before!)


"What did Sputnit do?     (American education system's failure)


"My dad wasn't scientific...BUT HE WAS AMERICAN!!!!!)     (The roots of his stupidity reveal themselves.)


"......so true.........so true......."     (Note to self: Say this to appear intelligent.)


"Jeez."        (New drinking game, everytime you hear George say this.......***drinks***.....)


"GOSH!"         (Close enough.......***drinks***....)


"Little to mole...uh too ta too too strong for what they thought?"      (Huh?)


"It wasn't according to you a mils, a miscalculation..."     (Cranial poot)


"WHEN WE COME BACK RICHARD...........................TELL..............US..............WHY!!!!!!!!)        (George....loves....his....voice.)



"..and everything elsh?"       (Shtupid lip)


"INDEED!"        (WHY DOES HE SAY THIS???!??!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?  No seriously WHY?!?!?!?!)


"Gosh!"       (***drinks***)


"JEEEZ!"        (***drink***)


Guest: "He fingers it very very precisely."     (Cue porn music.)


Hoagland: "He actually dangled that in front of me."     (Cue weird porn music)


Hoagland: "They're trying to stick their fingers in the dikes."     (Cue really cool porn music)


Hoagland: "...except his butt ached a lot cuz he'd been in a plane with a bunch of other guys in uniform."    (Cue 'YMCA' dance mix LP)


"...we'll give you an opportunity to chat with our guests...about.............space."      (Dramatic!)


"INDEED!"        (I feel like the Manchurian Candidate when he says this, I want to kill someone...something EVERY
time!!!)


"Marilyn in carol lo line...uh California hello Marilyn..."     (idiot)


"INDEED INDEED!"           (why.........WHY!?!?!?!?)


Caller: "...the Clintons, that would be Hillary and George...."     (LOL, the Funkmaster?)


Frys Girl

George Clinton. LOL!!!! Awesome catch.  :D

I'm listening to the Alex Jones bit from August 7 and I noticed that AJ pronounces Al Qaeda - Alkhayeena.

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