George Noory Sucks! - The Definitive Compendium

[HAL 9000]

I smell a familiar flower....

I smelled it several days ago, and threw it away because it smelled bad to me. 

Me too - sometime back in the last week of Feb., while strolling through the Garden of CoastGab, I noticed something familiar and malodorous. So I sprayed this vegetation with Weed B Gon. I initially thought it worked, but alas, this weed-like wallflower reappeared within a few days. Apparently I sprayed it with Miracle-Gro®.

C'est la vie. A rose is a rose is a rose - or is it a rose by any other name...

[Mind Flayer Monk]

GN: "akrainted" instead of acquainted. Did he just finish eating something?

[Roy Hinkley]

One thing I REALLY hate about the show is when sNoory has a news shtory (Georgie's pronunciation) and he brings on one of his "experts".  He asks one stupid question, lets them partially answer it, cuts them off and then moves on with another shtory.  Why waste the time getting them on the phone for 30 seconds just to verify whatever the shtory is?  Eighty percent of the time he never lets them finish their comment anyway!

 

[Maxwell]

Acrainted.

[Roy Hinkley]

GN: "akrainted" instead of acquainted. Did he just finish eating something?

LOL heard that too.  His only fricken job is to read his stupid news notes he stole from Drudge and he can't even get through it without a mistake.  He butchers a word almost every sentence.  Remember when he was talking about his book and how he narrated the audio version?  He said how tough it was and he'd never do it again.  It probably took thousands of takes to get through that book with all his linguistic shortcomings!

[Roy Hinkley]

Can this guy pitch his book any more?  Every other sentence is "it's in the book"....

[The General]

Acrainted.

Keep going George, no one will notice that you can't pronounce anything.

[Roy Hinkley]

LOL he just screwed up "open lines" and said "ohnpen ines" or "ohnpen nines" or something without an "L".

[Doomed]

Ith hith tongue. Ith thtuck in hith thoelathe. 

[ziznak]

nuttin like a good ol child accident for George... lol.  It's kinda sad but I find it so funny when he tries to warn people of all the ways children can get hurt.

"be careful bout whaaacher leetin em kidsh climb aan."

[Mind Flayer Monk]

Woahhhh what a transition.
The caller was talking about a fear of dangling their hand off the bed and then GN came up with, "next time that happens, hand them a business card" and then played that business card place he is plugging.
Its worth listening too.

[Tinfoil Hat]

I'm beginning to wonder if George isn't suffering from some kind of dementia.

[Juan]

Between the horrible Don Ho version of "Over the Rainbow" and UFO Phil's Friday monstrosity, George and Tommy had a little talk.  There have been suggestions on this forum of an "other than business-like" relationship between the two.  I'm finally believing it.  During the talk, Tommy was giggling like a teenage girl about to hook up with the quarterback.

The talk was about the time just after sNoory moved to LA.  He wanted to interview the Rat Pack, but since Sinatra, Lawford, Davis and Martin were all dead by then, and none of sNoory's guests offered to conduct a seance, Joey Bishop was the only member left to interview.  Tommy sent Joey an email inviting him to come on the show.  A couple of months went by, and Bishop joined his pals in the Great Casino in the Sky.  Shortly after, Tommy got around to reading his email and found a reply from Joey Bishop saying he would love to be on the show.

Tommy giggled and said, "I deal with hundreds of emails."  Over what period of time, he didn't say, but let's assume he meant hundreds a day. I get at least 100 marriage proposals from hot Russian girls every day, plus at least 50 business offers from Nigeria and the Ivory Coast.  Who doesn't?

How did Tommy fail to get fired over this?  Or at least demoted?  I certainly would have when I was a TV producer, and would have expected it. Did George and Tommy have a special relationship from the beginning?  Or maybe George remote viewed his need in 10-years for an LA-born person to take him to the hospital.

[PB the Deplorable]

... How did Tommy fail to get fired over this?...

Because it was just another lie George concocted on his way into the office today?  Staying with George all these years, Tommy clearly has the same attitude towards the show, the guests, callers, and the lsiteners that George has, and about as many friends and interests outside the office - he'll always happily go along.

If by chance the story is true (snort), well, George doesn't really care anyway - he'd much rather fill the time talking about some long ago interview or talking about wanting to do one than actually do it. 

[valdez]

...The caller was talking about a fear of dangling their hand off the bed and then GN came up with, "next time that happens, hand them a business card"...

     He also managed to push the "insider club" to a caller that said George was being preempted in some town somewhere.  He could do that all night. "Sounds like you need a little P-90x."  "Carnavora, buddy.  Buy some Carnavora." "Invest in silver.  Now."  And what's this big deal with this c2c "app"?  That's all he talks about now.  Is that a game, or something?  John Lott needs to learn how to deal with Piers Morgan - Alex Jones style.  Otherwise he's useless.  I found Barry Taft to be kind of creepy.  The open line caller who thought he was going to watch his daughter die was moving.  George got to talking with producer Tom about all the guest that have died since he has been hosting and thought it would be a good idea to do a show honoring some of those guest. "Pick six of them," he told Tom.  "And we'll do a show on them."  Because, you know, George can't pick 'em, because he has no emotional attachment to them, but he wants to do a show about them.  Any six of them.  Start the car.  Play the ufo phil song.  Clean out the fridge.  He's done.

...and Joey Bishop too.

[PB the Deplorable]

...  George got to talking with producer Tom about all the guest that have died since he has been hosting and thought it would be a good idea to do a show honoring some of those guest. "Pick six of them," he told Tom.  "And we'll do a show on them."  Because, you know, George can't pick 'em, because he has no emotional attachment to them, but he wants to do a show about them.  Any six of them...

Ah, the Noory lackadasical tribute show.  Hasn't he done a couple of these before (Glenn Kimball for sure) - a frequent guest dies, all week George teases the tribute show to be aired on Friday.  The special night comes, Tommy puts on a few pieces of random tape from old shows which featured that guest, and George and Tommy leave for the weekend - no personal memories, no narration, no introduction of segments, just a disjointed mashup of old interviews and an excuse to take a night off.

Do us all a favor George and skip it if that's all the thought and effort you are going to put in.  If I were a guest, I'd insist on a signed agreement George would not do one of these phony 'tribute' shows for me if I happened to die before he gets canned.

[Falkie2013]

LOL heard that too.  His only fricken job is to read his stupid news notes he stole from Drudge and he can't even get through it without a mistake.  He butchers a word almost every sentence.  Remember when he was talking about his book and how he narrated the audio version?  He said how tough it was and he'd never do it again.  It probably took thousands of takes to get through that book with all his linguistic shortcomings!

That's because the only books Snoorge is used to seeing are coloring books and it was so difficult for him that he got confused when he didn't have any connect the dot animals in front of him


Soeaking of which, here's a link to the grey aliens/Mothman coloring book. I thought I had seen it all. I was wrong. 


http://terencehanley.blogspot.com/p/aliens-monsters-creatures-ufos-flying.html


here's a link to another space aliens coloring page.

http://www.coloring.ws/aliens.htm


any thing to keep snoory entertained ...



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[Falkie2013]

     He also managed to push the "insider club" to a caller that said George was being preempted in some town somewhere.  He could do that all night. "Sounds like you need a little P-90x."  "Carnavora, buddy.  Buy some Carnavora." "Invest in silver.  Now."  And what's this big deal with this c2c "app"?  That's all he talks about now.  Is that a game, or something?  John Lott needs to learn how to deal with Piers Morgan - Alex Jones style.  Otherwise he's useless.  I found Barry Taft to be kind of creepy.  The open line caller who thought he was going to watch his daughter die was moving.  George got to talking with producer Tom about all the guest that have died since he has been hosting and thought it would be a good idea to do a show honoring some of those guest. "Pick six of them," he told Tom.  "And we'll do a show on them."  Because, you know, George can't pick 'em, because he has no emotional attachment to them, but he wants to do a show about them.  Any six of them.  Start the car.  Play the ufo phil song.  Clean out the fridge.  He's done.

...and Joey Bishop too.

Joey was the guy behind the scenes who kept the entire Rat Pack thing on stage going. Unlike Sinatra, et al, he didn't stay up all night drinking and partying. Kind of like the designated driver for a hard drinkin' bunch of guys and gals.

I used to watch his talk show waaaay back in the early 1960's. He could be very funny and had a ironic and self deprecating sense of humor.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMXpahmPDFI


And he brought the gorgeous Abby Dalton to even more prominence than she had gotten on Hennessy too !

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[ziznak]

ahhhhhh... you guys make me feel young when you talk about shit that happened before I was born like you were there... thanks

[Falkie2013]

Me too - sometime back in the last week of Feb., while strolling through the Garden of CoastGab, I noticed something familiar and malodorous. So I sprayed this vegetation with Weed B Gon. I initially thought it worked, but alas, this weed-like wallflower reappeared within a few days. Apparently I sprayed it with Miracle-Gro®.

C'est la vie. A rose is a rose is a rose - or is it a rose by any other name...

Now if we could just convince Ortho to develop Snoore B Gon ...

[Falkie2013]

ahhhhhh... you guys make me feel young when you talk about shit that happened before I was born like you were there... thanks

One of the cable networks has been re-running episodes of The Joey Bishop Show ( the tv show, not the talk show ) of late. Sadly, they're in black and white.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnzl-1Sh_TA

I have this list of about 100 women I faunched over in my youth. Abby's one of them.

* sigh *

[Juan]

I was looking at our friend Tinfoil Hat's avatar, and it occurred to me that perhaps the reason sNoory can't pronounce anything is because he's a LOL Cat.

[someguy]

     Early in the interview Robert Thomas stated that the God of the Bible was a myth, and spent most the night disparaging the world's religions, calling them a "plague on the earth," but he has no problem buying into the whole Annuaki thing (or as he called them: Anna-Nookies), and when George asked him for evidence (yeah, George asked for evidence...somebody send blankets to hell) Thomas said it wasn't up to him to prove anything, and that it was up to mainstream science to prove that these ancient Summerian tales didn't happen.  I'm going to have to read up on this "Gilgamesh" thing.  I liked his concept that the true God of the universe was the singularity that existed right before the bang.  And I thought his long pauses were cool.  I knew George was going to scold him for it.  No thinking on George's watch. Damon Vickers on the current Wall Street frenzy. Richard C. Hoagland takes a bow for being right about oceans on Europa splashing around something or other.



 

Anna-nookies!

It really pissed me off how he bitched at the guest for dead air. Hey Noory you dumb fuck, you're the host! It's your fucking job to fill that! Noory you fucking nonce.

[Morgus]

It really pissed me off how he bitched at the guest for dead air. Hey Noory you dumb fuck, you're the host! It's your fucking job to fill that! Noory you fucking nonce.

and it was all Noory's fault for asking some off topic questions the guest was not prepared to answer, like Noory's catholic religious view questions.

[coaster]

Woahhhh what a transition.
The caller was talking about a fear of dangling their hand off the bed and then GN came up with, "next time that happens, hand them a business card" and then played that business card place he is plugging.
Its worth listening too.

I'm not sure if thats the most brilliant segue ever, or the worst of all time.

[PB the Deplorable]

It really pissed me off how he bitched at the guest for dead air. Hey Noory you dumb fuck, you're the host! It's your fucking job to fill that! Noory you fucking nonce.

George thinks it's his job to schedule the guests and collect paychecks as the on air 'talent', and the guests job to present the material.

His mentor, Dr Morgus just introduced the late night movies and pushed 'play' - that's all George wants to do.

[popple]

I was looking at our friend Tinfoil Hat's avatar, and it occurred to me that perhaps the reason sNoory can't pronounce anything is because he's a LOL Cat.

[Falkie2013]

As a long time cat owner, I feel deeply insulted that anyone would think that Snoory had ANY similarity to any cat.

So do my cats and in all probability, Art's cats, my girlfriend's cat and all cats everywhere.

Snoory is more like snore cat than a lol cat anyway. But he isn't a cat and could never come up that high on the evolutionary ladder.

[Falkie2013]

" Here comes the Snoorge, the big number ecch.
  Snoorge is here, his cluelessness is second to none.

  Here comes the King of boobs, so throw your a fit and hope that no one will call.
  From the heights of Art, Snoorge took such a big fall.

  Snoorge is the one that's behind all the rest.
  And late at night we have to listen to this pest.
  One segment will tell you, so loud and clear.
  So many things you thought you'd never hear.

  There's only one Snoorge, and he comes to us from Premiere !

  When you say Snoorge, you've heard a lot of things no body else would say.

  When you say Snoorge,  he's said enough to give us all his very worst.

  When you say Snoorge, the King of garbled speech is on the air !

  The Snoorge is here, there and every where.

  So for your sanity, beware !

  When you say Snoorge, you've not quite sure you heard it all.

  When you say Snoorge, banality comes with every call.

  Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh.

  Listen long enough, it begins to take a toll.

  As he talks again about the burning pizza roll.

  It's Snoorge, it's Snoorge, it's Snoorge, it's Snoorge.

  Ya, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh. "

 

With apologies to Budweiser and Budweiser fans everywhere.

We would normally remind you to drink responsibly, but after 4 hours of Snoory, go ahead and get plastered so you might not be able to remember the program in the morning.







 

[Falkie2013]

LOL he just screwed up "open lines" and said "ohnpen ines" or "ohnpen nines" or something without an "L".

Ohnpen nines ?

Go fish.