BellGab.com Archive

Quote from: bateman link=topic=r3.msg326472#msg326472 date=1420504736
Riveting programming ahead.

I'm looking forward to when Jorch really hits the fringe with a show addressing the latest in cooking utensils.

Quote from: Morgus on January 05, 2015, 01:29:04 AM
Yep but we never heard them since Noory would just use his delay dump button and then claim "oops we seem to have mysteriously lost our guest, lets go to open lines" 

Just think about how many folks got to hear Lionel Fanthorpe over the years.

Quote from: bateman on January 05, 2015, 01:19:00 AM
I can't get over the title - so appropriate for Jorch. "Sumone's Hiding Sumpthin'!" 

You just nailed Jorch's sole contribution.  Too bad the publisher didn't properly capture Noory-phonetics.

Quote from: NoMoreNoory on January 04, 2015, 11:32:11 PM
I just wanted to quickly note this Friday night moment before we begin to submerge with the artists tonight.


Joorch introduced a caller as Joe, and then of course added 'Go ahead, Joseph!'
Hearing what was clearly a woman's voice on the phone, Noory spluttered 'Oh! You must be....a Josephine. Josephine!'
'No. Mary-Jo'


Maybe that'll teach him to quite this inane shortening or elongating of people's names. But I doubt it.

Just look what Jorch has learned from 12 years of experience hosting C2C and how much the show has benefited from it.

Quote from: Jorch Einstein on January 05, 2015, 12:05:40 AM
I wonder if Hoaxland had to prostrate himself before Jorch and kiss his ring before Jorch let him back on Coast.

I'm sure The Hoaxster had to endure some type of sadistic torture as penance.  Maybe Jorch forced him into a duet of "I've Got You, Babe."  The horror.

Quote from: coaster on January 04, 2015, 11:27:39 PM
Doubt it. Where else would they try to sell their garbage? Don't bite the hand that feeds you.

Look what happened to Hoagie after yukking it up with Art on DM.  Jorch is a petty, vengeful fellow.

Quote from: Paper*Boy on January 04, 2015, 10:19:37 PM
We're coming right up on Feb

"Jeesch, ish come'n quick'r thun everrr!"

Quote from: 3OctaveFart on January 04, 2015, 06:38:29 PM
Whatever self-reform he chooses, Noory should begin by eliminating several words from his vocabulary. Starting with "indeed" - a word that almost means nothing, hence being useful to Jorch.

"Valley Speak" is bad enough.  I cringe when I hear a vocabulary seemingly limited to "like," "awesome," "amazing," for sure," and "dude."  Noory can make a Valley Talker appear to be an Oxford graduate.

Quote from: zeebo on January 03, 2015, 11:12:33 PM
My recommendation, save that one for a great Knapp show, or maybe Art's first return show if it happens. 

Still it does make me wonder whether George drinks apple juice or warm milk when he reminisces about his glory days of youth, throwin' frogs at the wall and munchin' on moths.

He only breaks out the Ovaltine for those special hamster stomping memories.

Quote from: aldousburbank on January 04, 2015, 06:35:48 PM
Oh great- The Dubbster and Eyenoeyeno have called the dude playing a dude playing another dude's hand. Fuk.

Ok so... Yes, the dude and Eyenoeyeno are close, but like any other fools, don't always take the time to actually share what's up with each other- we just slide on being "friends", and inertia floats time forward so quickly that many things go unsaid. So here's a new year's message to her, (she's aware of many of my particulars and very smart so can fill in the blanks that the rest of you have to wonder about), and all of you alls from the dude behind the dude:

2014 was a year in which we lost a lot, pretty much everything we put ourselves into, we lost. I was on crutches or a cane for the last half of it and still am. But I have kids and grandkids so I can't just be lame and/or give up. So I tried to help myself.

Therefore, I have just returned from a two week journey of multiple thousands of miles and realities.

Exactly two weeks ago, in the most mystical place on earth that I know, my 26 year habit of rolling my own organic tobacco just threw itself into the tipi fire. Have not smoked anything since. (Using medibles and a couple of light vape hits daily for the medical needs donchaknow) Anyway, it's kinda weird because I was not trying to stop smoking, never really have, because I really like it. So yeah, some kind of medical miracle no craving thing. Feels weird to not own a lighter. Wow.

Anyhoo, this is not about smoking or not- it's about living or not.

Exactly one week ago, my 11 year old son and I were spending the night in a mountain cabin with two of my oldest friends who have been married to each other since we graduated high school together. It was snowy and awesome, above 9,000 ft altitude. I hadn't had a sip of alcohol in weeks, was not stoned, (waiting to smoke with friends), but something went awfully weird. Shortly after arriving, I felt really exhausted so said goodnight to my 3 fellow cabin mates and went upstairs to rest. But what I remember next was hearing, then seeing my friends and my son trying to bring me back into my body from... what seemed like somewhere slightly above the scene where I was floating super comfortably. I did not want to wake up or do whatever it was that they were saying loudly down there. I was so happy- until I saw my son totally freaked, yelling  "Dad Dad Dad!!!"

Holy shit! I suddenly noticed that they were leaning me over and I was puking and choking on puke and really very fucked up and hella disoriented and tripping not in a good way. I guess I was asphyxiating and luckily, they caught me. Food poisoning, combined with altitude sickness? I really don't care.

But since then it's felt like a twilight zone episode where I really did die and this whole week has just been Jacob's Laddering around, saying adios to friends and family, petting the cat, saying goodbye to things and places and myself and stuff.

Continuing the journey home, on new year's day, I was driving on the last leg of this epic journey just in time to see a freshly slammed into the back of a semi young freshly dead kid on his motor rocket cycle. Man, that really made me sad. It had me crying again when I had tried to give that up for 2015 and we were only a few hours in.

So yeah- Maybe life's always like this. Maybe I'm better off for the knowing how delicate it all is. But tobacco is a bad way to try to take yourself out. The good stuff which Eyenoeyeno and I have enjoyed together is too awesome to mess with this way IMO. Anyway there's a lot better and more likely ways to go. I've lost two dear friends to asphyxiation in the past few years and now with that experience myself, I know that they were perfectly comfortable when it happened. Yeah, THEY were. But not those of us left to bury their asses. It sucked for us.

Anyway, that is my weird and wandering new year's message with no point other than, if you are still alive, enjoy it. It doesn't last that long and lets go easy. You'll be fine when it inevitably happens, but we'll all miss you.

Post Edit- pondering why and what I just posted. Here is the moral of my story; I'd rather die in bed with pussy, than die in bed like a pussy!

You're The Man, Aldous.  May you keep on truck'n to enjoy many more sunrises and sunsets.

Quote from: Major Ed Damien on January 04, 2015, 04:26:14 PM

No such luck.

George will leave "Coast-to-Coast AM" only when his cold dead digits are examined for remaining life by the Numbers Lady, who we hope considers 911 a disguised 666.

Maybe Jorch will discuss his personal secrets for creating luck when eating pizza rolls.  Or how he finds meaning by reading Carnivora commercial scripts like a third grader.  Oh, the delicious anticipation.

Adam West was the best Batman.

Quote from: zeebo on January 03, 2015, 11:39:59 PM
Oh frig I just realized tomorrow's another Noory-patented Suckable Sunday.

Topics:  Creating Luck/ Finding Meaning. 

"Creating Luck/ Finding Meaning?"  Thanks for finally retiring tonight, Jorch!

Quote from: Major Ed Damien on January 03, 2015, 05:10:57 PM
I just saw George Noory yapping on some alien program featured by the Non-History Channel. 

George's wig and mustache were so uniformly inky black that it created its own alien mystery. 

A voice came to me sounding exactly like the program's narrator:

"Could aliens have dipped that shit into a substance so black and impenetrable -- so tar-like and false-looking -- as to make a sixty-something-year-old man look and sound even more foolish?"

I'm surprised Noory hasn't shown up on a reverse mortgage commercial yet.  I'm sure he and The Numbers lady could make a convincing effort.

Quote from: (Redacted) on January 03, 2015, 04:31:13 PM

What?!  I hope you didn't have to settle for Nacho Cheese Doritos; the horror.
Yes, I only wanted 5, so the other 2 went in the trash.  Cooked first, of coursh, I'm not a barbarian.

I can almost remember when I thought Nacho Cheese Doritos and Genesee Cream Ale were a gourmet meal.  Come to think of it...

 

Quote from: popple on January 03, 2015, 03:57:52 PM



Clearly no one cared what Jorch was up to when on air. No need to focus on the task at hand.

Does anyone have the GN sucks page number for when he got the smack down from Art? "i never lied to you folks. It's just not what i do"

Ha!  Those were hilarious days on BG.  Noory showing-up and just digging his cesspool even deeper.

The Art "smackdown" of Noory was priceless.  When was that?  September, October 2013?  Good times, good times.

Quote from: Zetaspeak on January 03, 2015, 12:03:18 PM
I am not sure if I am reading too much into this but at 2:16AM eastern time on the Friday night/Saturday morning show right in the middle of with his interview with Alten the C2C official twitter account tweeted out NOT information on how to get the guest book but information how to pre-order Noory's book.

I just found that odd timing (and somewhat lack of class) that his show's twitter account was promoting Noory side stuff during the exact same time Jorch are interviewing somebody else.

It's typical of Noory and the classless PremRat ops.  Any cheesy attempt to make a buck is the standard MO.

It did remind me of the time Noory popped-up on the GNS thread in one of his shameless promotion attempts.  It was during a C2C show and it became obvious he was ignoring the guest more than usual.  As you'd expect, Noory didn't notice until one of the GNS thread participants pointed out he might want to get back to his supposed hosting duty.  Classic.

Quote from: Morgus on January 03, 2015, 01:54:09 AM

...In contrast, Noory however doesn't mind the "lowest common denominator" at all apparently. 

That's one of the reasons PremRat keeps Noory.  Noory attracts them like an overflowing dumpster attracts vermin.  In C2C's case, it's all the fools dumb enough to keep buying Carnivora and all the other crap hawked by the PremRat radio carnival.  They think Noory is just swell.  Noory's just a very well paid imbecilic carny. 

Even Father Time is sick of Jorch.  He's speeding up time to get to Jorch's retirement sooner.

Quote from: 136 or 142 on January 02, 2015, 06:15:46 PM
Just out of curiosity, for balance, shouldn't there be a "George Noory doesn't suck" thread?

Hell, even Noory knew the GNS thread was the only place to post.

Quote from: Georgie For President 2216 on January 02, 2015, 05:27:21 PM
UFO Phil looks pretty good in that video.  He should keep going with this edgy themed music.

Ha!  This actually would be a giant leap for UFO Philicia.

Here's another one for Jorch.  It looks like one of his current fans did the video.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=953PkxFNiko

Quote from: Jorch Einstein on January 02, 2015, 02:31:05 PM
Next time Jorch treats an audience to his awful singing, he should do a version of Send In The Clowns.

That should be the opener for every Jorch show, instead of "The Chase."  It feels like an act of desecration everytime I hear a song that used to be so identified with an icon of radio, Art Bell, start off another wretched Noorathon. 

Welcome, ZetaSpeak.  Please forgive the oblique, unintended political reference but "I feel your pain."

Quote from: Juan Cena on January 02, 2015, 02:12:50 AM
FSU finally got what was coming to them.

Ohio State made its case it deserved to be in the CFP.

Paul Finebaum's show tomorrow is gonna be a whopper.

And the Buckeyes beat Bama with a third string QB.  I'll bet Cardale Jones wasn't saying "But I'm not Braxton Miller or J.T. Barrett," Jorch.

Quote from: zeebo on January 02, 2015, 01:01:58 AM
"George your turkee sammich weighs in at 14 ounces and 1+4=5 and that's the number of love."

LOL. )  PremRat, what hath thou wrought.

Quote from: 21st Century Man on January 02, 2015, 12:38:59 AM
Another year of bumper suckage at Coast to Coast.     There's a lot of great bands/singers from Detroit but what does the Motor City Moron play? Tony Bennett, Paul Anka, Frank Sinatra and Bobby Vinton.  :


I actually like Sinatra but Noory plays his sappiest tunes.

Sinatra, Bennett, great singers but for the appropriate time.  Noory has no sense of timing and, even worse, could give a crap less as long as he's riding the PremRat gravy train.  That's all he gives a rat's ass about.

Quote from: Morgus on January 02, 2015, 12:31:52 AM
Noory claims until man walks on Mars... 

Which isn't going to happen in Jorch's lifetime.  I believe he also claims he's going to torture everybody until he collapses on air.  Lucky us.

Quote from: zeebo on January 01, 2015, 11:06:09 PM
Some scars never completely heal.

I still remember Noory gloating about it.  What an insufferable jerk.  GNS.

Quote from: zeebo on January 01, 2015, 10:26:58 PM
To make it worse, I just realized we're nearing Jorch's 12th anniversary of suckage - Tues. the 6th by my calculations. 

I recall that it was the epic disaster of the infamously-awful 10th anniversary show which sent me into such an exasperated state that I first arrived here, seeking solace amongst other c2c refugees.

I remember that gut wrenching event.  How much longer will the pain continue?